Page 7 of Thea at Sixteen


  “Lipstick?” Thea asked. To the best of her knowledge, Sybil didn’t even know what lipstick was.

  “Well, some girls my age wear makeup,” Sybil said. “My parents won’t let me. But I thought your mother might, and you probably couldn’t get out to buy any, so I got you some. It’s red.” She handed over the lipstick to Gina, and then grabbed it back. “It still has its price on it,” she explained. She unpeeled the sticker, and gave the lipstick to Gina.

  “It is red,” Gina said, twisting it open. “What do you think, Kip?”

  “It’s lovely,” he said. “Do you want to put some on?”

  “Can I?” Gina asked.

  “I don’t see why not,” Kip said.

  “I wish I had a mirror,” Gina said. “So I could put it on better.”

  “I have one,” Claire said, and she whipped a mirror out of her pocketbook. She handed it to Gina, until it became obvious Gina couldn’t manage both the lipstick and the mirror. Claire took the mirror back then, and held it so Gina could see her reflection.

  Gina carefully applied the lipstick. It was appallingly red, and it made Gina look all the paler. “How do I look?” Gina asked. “Older?”

  “Much older,” Kip said. “Thank you, Sybil.”

  “Why are you thanking her?” Claire asked. “Do you intend to wear it, Kip?”

  Kip and Gina both laughed. Thea could see then how much they looked alike, what Gina would have grown up to look like if things had been better.

  “Dani wears makeup,” Gina said. “Lots of it.”

  “I know,” Claire said. “She wears it really well, too. Some girls just cover their faces with it, and they don’t know what they’re doing, but Dani wears just the right amount and colors. I wish I could do that, but Nicky and Megs say I’m too young. Next year they say.”

  “You don’t need makeup,” Kip said. “Neither does Gina. You’re both natural beauties.”

  “Men,” Claire said to Gina. “They think that’s a compliment.” She and Gina shared a smile.

  “Uh, Claire, now that Kip’s here, maybe you and Sybil should get going,” Thea declared. “We don’t want to tire Gina out with too much company.”

  “Would you like us to stay a little longer, Gina?” Claire asked.

  “Thanks, Claire, but Thea’s right,” Kip said. “Natural beauties shouldn’t get overstimulated.”

  “All right,” Claire said with a sigh. “Come on, Sybil. We’re being kicked out.”

  “I know,” Sybil said. “I hope you like the lipstick, Gina.”

  “I love it,” Gina said. “Thank you, Sybil. Thank you, Claire.”

  “You’re welcome,” Claire said. She gathered her things and got up to leave. “Oh, Kip,” she said. “Nicky and Megs were both saying how much they’d like to meet you, too. Why don’t you come over for supper one day this week?”

  “Thank you,” Kip said. “Are you sure?”

  “Of course I’m sure,” Claire said. “Today’s Monday. How’s Wednesday?”

  “Oh, please go, Kip,” Gina said. “Then you can tell me all about their house.”

  Kip smiled. “Fine,” he said. “I’ll see you on Wednesday then.”

  “Great,” Claire said. “Come on, Sybil. Let’s give these people some peace and quiet.”

  “I’m coming,” Sybil said, and she followed Claire out.

  “That was wonderful,” Gina said. “Thank you, Thea.”

  “You’re welcome,” Thea said. “They wanted to meet you, too.”

  “Claire is so beautiful,” Gina said. “Isn’t she, Kip?”

  Kip nodded. “She’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,” he replied.

  Thea was used to hearing that about Claire, but it annoyed her anyway. “Sybil’s beautiful, too,” she said. “Or she will be when she gets older.” She turned suddenly to face Gina, with her mouth blood red and no chance at growing older, and wished she were anywhere but there.

  Kip looked stricken also, and Thea realized how painful it must have been for him, too, to contrast Gina to healthy girls her age. Thea wished she could be sure that Gina didn’t mind, but she seemed even smaller and weaker than she had been before Thea’s remark.

  “I don’t feel so good anymore,” Gina whispered.

  “I know, pumpkin,” Kip said, walking over to her. “Too much company. Too much excitement.”

  “Maybe I want to sleep,” Gina said.

  “Tell you what,” Kip said. “Why don’t we wipe off some of that lipstick, before you get it all over the pillow, and then you can take a nap.” He took a couple of tissues, and gently wiped his sister’s mouth. Most of the lipstick came off, and the trace that remained gave Gina the illusion of color. “Now, you take as long a nap as you want, and I’ll still be here when you wake up.”

  “Promise?” Gina asked.

  “Promise,” Kip said. He kissed her again, and stroked her hair, until Gina turned over and closed her eyes.

  Kip sat there for a moment, and Thea looked at them, brother and sister, sharing a connection that went deeper than any she’d ever felt with her sisters, no matter how much she loved them. If Kip could have stroked his life into Gina, Thea knew he would have. When they could hear Gina breathing deeply, Kip gestured for Thea to leave, and the two of them walked away.

  “There’s no reason for you to stay,” Kip said, once they were in the corridor. “Gina won’t be expecting you here when she wakes up.”

  “I know,” Thea said. “I’ll go in a minute.” She looked at Kip, and although she tried to prevent it, a tear rolled down her cheek. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I have no right.”

  “It’s okay,” Kip said, and he wiped the tear off with the same gentleness he had shown his sister. “Gina is worth some tears.”

  “She looks so small,” Thea said. “Small and sick. I never realized.”

  “It was a rough weekend,” Kip said. “Friday night was very bad, but then she pulled out of it. Not altogether, but she’s better than she was yesterday, and she was better then than Saturday.”

  “Good,” Thea said. “It isn’t right that she should die so soon.”

  “It isn’t going to be right whenever she dies,” Kip declared. “Look, on Friday, well I didn’t know. I mean, I know you’ll want to be informed when … when she’s dead, but should I call you before then?”

  “You mean when she’s dying?” Thea asked.

  “Yeah,” Kip said. “That’s what I mean.”

  Thea had never thought about that. She’d had fantasies about Gina making a miraculous recovery, but this was the first time she really pictured the dying, the death, the funeral. “What would happen if I knew?” she asked, feeling like a coward for not agreeing on the spot.

  “You could see her,” Kip said. “To say good-bye. I don’t know if she’ll be conscious, or aware that you’re there, so it would be more for you than her. If you don’t want to, you certainly don’t have to.”

  “Should I be there until it’s over?” Thea asked.

  Kip smiled and shook his head. “No,” he said. “My mother and I will be, we’ve already talked about it, and maybe Dani if we can convince her to, but not you. Just family. All you’d do is come in and say good-bye, and then you can go on home.”

  “I can do that,” Thea said. “I mean, I’d like to.”

  “What you mean is you can,” Kip said. “Good. Now I know. When the doctors tell us, I’ll tell you.”

  “Thank you,” Thea said. “Do you think it’s going to be soon?”

  “No,” Kip replied. “The weekend gave us a scare, and it really forced Mom and me to talk about things, but Gina should get stronger again. She might develop an infection, of course, but that risk has been there all along. The doctors think Gina might live another six months if we’re lucky.”

  “Six months,” Thea said. “That’s good.”

  “We need the time,” Kip said. “Mom does in particular. She still hasn’t made peace with herself.”

 
Thea nodded. Six months felt like forever just then. The world could change in six months. Cures could be found.

  “I’d better get back in there,” Kip said. “Gina’s been catnapping a lot lately. If she wakes up, she’ll worry about me.”

  “I’ll go home, then,” Thea said. “I’ll see you Thursday.”

  “Wednesday,” Kip said. “Remember? For dinner.”

  “Oh, that’s right,” Thea said. “Wednesday. See you then.”

  “And thanks, Thea,” Kip said. “You said Sybil would come, and she did. Now I know I can count on you.”

  “Good,” Thea said. “I’m glad.” She smiled at Kip, and walked away from him and the hospital and a pain so intense she didn’t know if she could bear to be within a hundred miles of it.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  “Our first dinner guest,” Meg declared, as she finished setting the table. “Everything should look just right.”

  “It looks beautiful, Megs,” Thea said. “Thank you.”

  “Yeah, thanks, Megs,” Claire said. “This has got to be a lot better than what Kip’s used to.”

  “I still don’t see why you invited him,” Sybil said. “You know Nicky doesn’t want him here.”

  “That’s why,” Claire replied. “And to make Thea happy. After all, the only place she gets to see him is by a hospital bed. That’s no way to conduct a courtship.”

  “There’s no courtship to conduct,” Thea declared. “And you’ve got to stop doing things that drive Nicky crazy. It isn’t fair.”

  “Life isn’t fair,” Claire said with a shrug. “And driving Nicky crazy is one of my few real pleasures. Megs doesn’t mind, do you, Megs?”

  “It keeps things interesting,” Meg replied. “Thea, get Nicky out from his office. I want us all to be in the living room when Kip arrives.”

  “Why?” Sybil asked.

  “To make sure Nicky makes an appearance,” Claire replied. “Shrewd thinking, Megs.”

  “And I don’t want any teasing tonight,” Meg declared. “Poor Kip will probably feel overwhelmed, anyway, and we want this to be as pleasant a dinner as possible. You owe him that, Claire, since this was all your idea.”

  “I’ll be a saint,” Claire promised.

  “That’ll be the day,” Thea said, and she left to retrieve Nicky. He was sitting by his desk, staring out at the trees by his window. The autumn colors were starting to burst forth. “Megs wants you to join us,” Thea said, hating to disturb him.

  “So I won’t have to make a grand entrance?” Nick asked. “Fair enough. I’ll be in in a minute.”

  “I’ll wait here for you,” Thea replied, planting herself by the door.

  Nicky laughed. “All right, I’m coming,” he said. “I’m glad for the interruption, anyway. My thoughts weren’t such pretty ones.”

  “What were they?” Thea asked.

  “Things from the past,” Nick replied. “I was thinking about my mother.”

  Thea was silent. She wanted Nicky to tell her more, but was afraid that anything she might say would cause him not to.

  “I realized how sick she was on a day very much like this one,” Nick said. “I was sixteen, the same as you. She died a few months later.”

  “That must have been awful,” Thea said.

  Nicky shrugged and again reminded Thea of Claire. “It was a relief,” he said. “My mother hated her life. She didn’t will herself to be sick, but she certainly didn’t try to get well.”

  “But she must have wanted to stay alive for you,” Thea said. “She must have loved you a lot.”

  “Not that I ever noticed,” Nick replied. “I was a constant reminder of my father.”

  Thea couldn’t understand how that could be bad, when Nicky’s father had died a hero on D-day. But maybe his stepfather had hated the comparison between himself and Nicky’s father, Mr. Sebastian. Thea realized she had no names for her grandparents, and very little sense of who they were.

  “Enough,” Nick said. “It’s ancient history. Now, what do I need to know about this Kip Claire so cavalierly invited for dinner?”

  “He’s very nice,” Thea replied. “And he’s going to go to college in New York as soon as … as he can.”

  Nicky nodded, and got up. “So Burger Bliss isn’t his life’s work,” he said.

  “It’s just for the money,” Thea said. “Kip’s different, Nicky. He has responsibilities.”

  “Some people do,” Nick said. They began walking toward the living room, but as they did, the doorbell rang. “You’d better get that,” he said. “Before Claire does, and eats him alive.”

  Thea smiled, and ran to the door. She beat Claire there by half a step.

  “Hi, Kip,” she said, opening it to find him there. Suddenly she felt self-conscious about all the things they had yet to do with the house. Nicky would never have permitted a real guest, someone helpful in his business dealings, to see the house in the state it was in. “Come on in.”

  “I brought flowers,” Kip said, handing over a supermarket bouquet to her. He was wearing a suit that looked as though it had fit him better a couple of years before. Thea could see from two little nicks that he had just shaved. She realized he must have worked, visited Gina, then gone home, and changed. She wondered if his mother had insisted on the suit. She wished he weren’t wearing it; he looked so gawky and ill at ease.

  “You’ve met Claire,” she said, leading him into the living room. “And Sybil. And these are my parents. Nicky, Megs, this is Kip Dozier.”

  “It’s very nice to meet you, Kip,” Meg said, giving him one of her best warm-welcoming smiles. Nicky stood still and appraised the cost of Kip’s suit. “Thea’s told us so much about you.”

  “She’s been great,” Kip said. “I mean, visiting Gina and all.” He looked like he wanted to burst out of his suit and run. Thea wasn’t sure she blamed him.

  “Supper’s informal tonight,” Meg said. “I hope you don’t mind if we eat in the kitchen. We’re working on the dining room just now, and it doesn’t have any furniture.”

  “We’ve been scrubbing the walls,” Claire told him. “It’s hell on fingernails. See.” She thrust her hands at him so Kip could examine the nonexistent damage.

  “Devastating,” Kip said, and for the first time he sounded like himself. Thea smiled at him, and he smiled back.

  “Please sit down, Kip,” Meg said. “Would you like something to drink?”

  “No, thank you,” he said. “This is a very nice house, Mrs. Sebastian.”

  “It will be soon,” Meg said. “Right now we’re still in the scrubbing and peeling stage. I always said I wanted to renovate an old house, but now that I’m doing it, I have to question why.”

  “Do you want us to move?” Nick asked. “We can, Daisy, if that’s what you want.”

  Megs laughed. “I just want the right to complain,” she replied. “And then when the house is perfect, I want to be allowed to brag for two solid years.”

  “I hate renovating,” Claire said. Thea was pleased to see she was behaving like herself, and not that strange saintlike visitor Kip had met on Monday. “I intend to complain even after the house is perfect.”

  “It must be difficult,” Kip said. “Are you doing all the work yourself?”

  “We are as a family,” Meg replied.

  “I supervise,” Nick said. “I don’t like working with my hands.”

  “Ah,” Kip said. “I do.”

  “Do you, now,” Nick said. “Are you good with mechanics, that sort of thing?”

  “I’m good enough,” Kip said. “But that isn’t my primary interest.”

  “What is?” Meg asked.

  “Sculpting,” Kip replied. “I’m going to be a sculptor.”

  “You’re kidding,” Thea said. “You never told me that.”

  “It never came up,” Kip said, and Thea realized that was true. Their conversations almost always revolved around Gina and her needs.

  “A sculptor,” Nick said. “That’s a
n interesting career choice.”

  “I never met anyone who wanted to be a sculptor,” Claire said, as though, by age fourteen, she’d met one of everything else. “Is there any money in it?”

  “Probably not,” Kip replied. “And it’s murder on fingernails.”

  “I bet,” Claire said, checking hers again.

  “It is an unusual ambition for a high-school student,” Meg said.

  “I’m no longer in high school,” Kip said. “Although to be honest, I’ve wanted to be one for a few years now.”

  “But why a sculptor?” Sybil asked. “Why not a painter, or a cabinetmaker?”

  Kip laughed. “Or a dentist or an accountant?” he said. “Or a sub assistant manager at a Burger Bliss?”

  “We all understand why you don’t want to be a sub assistant manager,” Nick said. “But Sybil’s question is a valid one. Why sculpting, as opposed to some other form of art?”

  “Because I’m interested in immortality,” Kip said. “Watercolors can be used to line bird cages. Oils can be painted over, until the only way you can find the original is by X rays. Etchings and lithographs are pleasant enough, but they don’t last, either. I want my work to be around even when I’m gone.”

  “Have you ever sculpted Gina?” Claire asked.

  Kip shook his head. “I don’t do representational work,” he replied. “I work in metals mostly, welding my pieces together, when I can afford it. Lately, all I’ve been doing is sketching things I’d like to put together someday.”

  “That’s fascinating,” Meg said. “Will art be your major when you to college?”

  “Yeah,” Kip said. “And burgers’ll be my minor. I’m going to have to work my way through, even with the scholarship aid I’m getting.”

  “They must have been impressed with your work,” Nick said. “To offer you the scholarship.”

  “I’m good,” Kip said. “I’m going to get a lot better.”

  Thea looked at Kip and wondered where this person had come from. Where was the gentle, loving Kip who could make Gina laugh? Where was the sharp-tongued Kip who could make Thea shrivel? How many sides were there to him, and how many would she ever get to know?

  “How do your parents feel about your ambitions?” Nick asked.