His fingers moved in circular motions along my outer thigh before sweeping over my hip and landing dangerously close to my core. I inhaled deeply when his fingers slipped under the cotton of my tank top, ran up over my waist and landed on the underside of my breast, goose bumps covering my skin. His touch caused every inch of my body to come alive.
“Fuck I’m going to miss this body,” he purred in my ear. My fingers ran the length of his bare back, running my finger nails along his skin, digging in just enough to hear his moan against my skin. His mouth took over mine and he teeth pulled on my bottom lip, sucking it before he slipped his tongue into my mouth and intensified our kiss, both of us tasting each other. I opened my eyes, wanting to see him as we continued to attack each other’s mouths in a kiss that was electrifying every part of my body. I had no idea how I was going to survive a month without him. He had to come over to New York. No doubt about it.
“You could always fly over for booty calls,” I whimpered as his hand glided its way to my panties, running ever so lightly over the silk and lace. I could feel I was ready, I was aching for him. Tate rested his hand on my bare stomach and rubbed it affectionately as he molded his body against mine from behind. His thumb teased my skin and goose bumps stood to attention. I could feel my body being once again overcome by the effect of Tate Connors.
“I really wish I could have my way with you, but Simon is coming over with breakfast in an hour, and an hour wouldn’t be long enough for what I want to do to you. We will have to wait for that booty call.” His lips vibrated against mine as he spoke and I nearly lost control.
I loved that he called Mr. Davenport “Simon,” but I didn’t love that he was leaving my body unsatisfied. Damn it!
“Now who is the tease?” I sulked as I shuffled in bed so Tate’s body was half covering mine. I studied his face. Absolute perfection. The smile lines around his eyes were ever so soft; moments where he looked so devastatingly gorgeous with the smirk that made women swoon all over the place were overshadowed by the innocence of his face right now. My fingertips came alive and he watched me closely as I ran my fingernails up his arms and over his stomach and chest as I etched the feeling of his body into my memories. My ego soared sky-high as his eyes darkened and locked on my mouth when I bit my bottom lip as I drank him in. Two could play the game of teasing.
“Sav, I really need to get out of this bed,” he groaned, rubbing his hands over his face and shaking his head slowly. I smiled in victory.
The warmth that Tate’s body was providing escaped the moment he pulled away from me and climbed out of bed. He stood by the bed and stretched in front of me; his boxer shorts slipping dangerously low on his hips, his perfect V tempting me. I rolled to my side and propped up my head and unashamedly ogled his body. The sun had decided right at this moment to beam onto his body, not that it needed any more attention. A mischievous grin spread across his face as he watched me blatantly soak him in. I couldn’t get enough of him.
“Can I leave now? Or do you need to look a bit more?” He winked and smirked down at me, his cheeks flushing ever so slightly.
“Just spin for me.” I wiggled my finger in a circular motion to him and chuckled as he spun around in front of me with his hands on his hips.
“Yep, you are good to go. I just made you blush again,” I taunted with my own smirk.
“Stop it!” Tate grumbled as he walked into the adjoining bathroom and out of my line of vision.
Mr. Davenport arrived within the hour; his arms full of brown paper bags, holding what I knew would be my favorite breakfast—croissants and bagels. In the words of Tanzi, I was turning into an “honorary American.”
“Have I told you how much I love you lately?” I gushed as I pulled the paper bags out of his grasp and opened them to allow the delicious aroma to engulf my senses. I rose on my tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek.
“Not lately, no. It’s been lacking.”
“Jealous boyfriend over here!” Tate laughed and held his hand in the air as he threw humored daggers toward Mr. Davenport.
“You’re the one who impregnated her. Why are you jealous?” Jack laughed and stuffed a croissant in his mouth.
Tate threw a bunched up pair of socks at Jack’s head, hitting him right between the eyes as we all laughed. Did Jack really just say impregnated? “You are such a gentleman, Jack!”
The alarm on my phone buzzed, it was time to start getting ready organized to leave and for the unwelcome goodbyes to begin.
“Sav, your car will be here in ten minutes. Start your goodbyes,” Mr. Davenport said as he walked toward me with Tate by his side. Both men looked calm and composed and I silently thanked the heavens above. I couldn’t deal with either of their stubbornness today.
Lucas looked at me with hooded eyes as I hesitantly walked toward him and sat on the edge of the armchair that he was lounging in.
“You call me when you get there. You are not doing this on your own,” Lucas’ voice lowered to give us privacy in the craziness of the living room.
“I’m not going to be doing this on my own. I have Tate,” I whispered and I saw Lucas look over at Tate and anger flash over his face. “Lucas, please,” I begged and grabbed his hand, softly pulling his attention back to me.
He closed his eyes and sighed as he raised his head and looked at the ceiling in frustration. “Anything you need, you call me. Anytime, okay? Uncle Lucas is on speed dial.” He smiled and kissed forehead before walking to Ali.
I walked toward Tanzi, who looked like she was about to burst into tears. Eyes so similar to Tate’s were looking at me in shaded happiness. I felt the lump grow in my throat as I looked at my best friend.
“Look after your brother, okay? He is going to need you. We both know he is fighting demons that this little one has brought up. I can’t think of him not being around, Tanzi. I don’t want to imagine it.” Tanzi pulled me into a tight hug and I felt her shaking under me. Not only was Tate hurting and dealing with the memories of his past, I knew Tanzi was hurting just as much and seeing her brother in turmoil was paining her.
“He loves you and he loves jellybean. Please don’t give up on him. I’m going to take him baby clothes shopping this weekend.” Tanzi grabbed my hand and looked at me with her big blue eyes and a hidden smile.
“I’m so scared that I’m going to come back and everything will be different,” I admitted sheepishly as my eyes flickered toward Tate, who was watching us closely but not able to hear us. I didn’t want to say it out loud, but my thoughts were running rampant.
“Call me as soon as you get there. I want weekly photos of your stomach and I expect you back here in a month. No excuses. You will get your ass back here. We have shopping to do.” I smiled at my best friend as she walked toward Lucas and Ali, and I felt my heart warm as I turned to Tate.
Tate grabbed me with shaky hands and pulled me close to his body. I could feel his heart thumping hard in his chest as I rested against him. He was panicking and I felt absolutely helpless. I huddled into him, trying so desperately to comfort him, but I couldn’t help but feel that I needed comforting too. We stood in silence, chest to chest as everything around us seemed to stop. I couldn’t ignore the tumultuous thoughts booming inside my head. Tate pulled away and with a finger and thumb lifted my face to look at him. I looked into those blue eyes that had held me captivated from the very beginning, the eyes that had comforted me and saw me for who I was, and I couldn’t help but let my tears fall over my cheeks. I was overwhelmed with happiness to have him but sad to be leaving him.
“Hey…don’t cry,” Tate whispered as he swept my tears away with his thumbs. “I love you, Sav. When you come home we have clothes to buy, names to decide on, I need to watch that little stomach of yours grow. My future is with you and Jellybean, okay? It’s just us three remember.”
“I don’t want to leave,” I whispered and huddled closely back into his chest.
“You will be back before we both know it. This is an awesome ex
perience with you. It’s only a month; we have the rest of our lives ok. I’ve got to show you that shower in New York, remember…hang on… Can we still have sex?” he said in barely a whisper, his brow furrowing. I giggled between my sobs.
His hands held my face as he made me look at him. His eyes were fighting tears of their own and I watched in slow motion as a single tear ran down his face, which caused my heart to swell, he needed me just as much as I needed him. His lips met mine softly and lovingly.
“I love you. Just please promise to talk to me, tell me how you are feeling,” I requested and gave him my biggest smile. I loved this man, and nothing was going to break the love I had for him. We were starting a family together and I was willing to do whatever I had to make him see what he meant to us.
“Sav, you’ve got to go,” Mr. Davenport said sympathetically beside me. I looked at him and sighed. Damn it!
I turned back toward the people who had now become my family and gave them the biggest smile I could muster.
“See you all soon! Don’t forget me. Jack, look after my best friend or else we’ll never have Jack-and-Sav time again. Tanzi, don’t you dare replace me. Ali, keep Lucas in line and Lucas, please make sure Jack doesn’t get arrested.” I laughed softly and grabbed the handle of my suitcase as Mr. Davenport’s impatience grew.
“I’ll walk you out,” Tate said softly beside me and took my suitcase out of my grasp.
“I already miss you, Sav!” Jack cried overdramatically, causing us all to laugh loudly, lifting the mood.
“I am pretty missable.” I winked at him and gave them one last look before walking out into the hall and out of the apartment building.
“So the minute you get back we need to talk names because Tanzi and Ali are going to drive me mad. Tanzi already wants to take me clothes shopping, she wants to dress Jellybean up as a kangaroo and she is talking about baby showers. I don’t even know what the hell a baby shower is.” Tate laughed softly beside me as he lifted my suitcase into the trunk.
“And I’m leaving you with that for a month.” I couldn’t help but laugh.
“Yeah, thanks for that.”
“Okay, lovebirds, we need to break this up. Sav, if you don’t get in that car right now, I will fire you.” Mr. Davenport tapped his foot and pointed into the backseat of my waiting car.
I rolled my eyes at him and scoffed. “Jesus, you threaten to fire me a lot.”
Tate grabbed my waist and pulled me toward him, breaking my standoff with Mr. Davenport. “Call me when you get there,” Tate whispered against my lips. He kissed me deeply and held me tightly. I didn’t want him to let me go. I wanted to stay in his arms forever.
“Of course. It’s only a month.” I smiled up at him as I climbed into the back of the cab and watched as he closed the door. I let out the biggest sigh.
I collapsed into my seat in the back of the cab beside Mr. Davenport and watched as my home faded away behind me. My body and mind were exhausted. I loved Tate like I had never loved another person. The thought of Tate struggling to come to terms with becoming a father and the way that our baby had reopened the wounds of his past broke my heart.
The moment I found out about Jellybean my world spun out of control and for once the thought of being out of control excited me. I was scared, afraid and petrified but I felt my heart swell beyond anything I had experienced. This little person growing inside of me was my savior; he or she would become my greatest accomplishment and the darkness and uncertainty of my past had been forgotten the moment I was told I had someone dependent on me. My little miracle. I knew this baby would heal so many wounds that Tate and I had—if we just gave it a chance.
I placed a protective hand on my stomach and shifted back into the leather seats. “I’m your mum, Jellybean, and I will always protect you, I will always love you and I’ll probably embarrass you way too many times. Your mummy and daddy love you so much.”
I looked down at my phone and looked at the words California and New York on my flight information. They even sounded so far away, so distant, so separate. I shut my eyes tightly as fresh tears threatened to spill. The feeling that I was going to regret the decision to go on this trip was so strong.
The life that I knew would never be the same again. I had moved to Los Angeles with the only family I had. I was smiling every day. I had fallen in love and now I had been given a miracle. This was a bittersweet moment and I couldn’t have been happier. I felt lucky, astonished, privileged and honored to be carrying such a precious gift of the beautiful baby growing inside of me, but I couldn’t shake the unease of a cloud threatening my sunshine. Even though I felt like the love of my life was slowly pulling away from me, I couldn’t help but feel like I was finally breathing.
To be continued
Acknowledgements
To my amazing family - your love and continued encouragement is what makes me who I am today. Without you I would not be the person I am today. I love you more than each of you could ever imagine.
To my own personal Tanzi – thanks for the craziness, the antics and the memories over the years, you are truly one in a billion
Elizabeth Lee – the critique master and all round top chick!! Thank you for your support, advice, comic relief and laughter at my Aussie slang. I don’t know what I’d do without you, you made me continue this story and I cannot thank you enough! Bring on 2014!
Holly Westring - Thank you for pushing me to my limits and for your encouragement along the way! What a ride!
Emma Hart – Thank you for my amazing cover and for being there to provide answers to all of my crazy questions. I’d be rocking in the corner if it wasn’t for you.
To my beta’s – your support of Sav and Tate has been exceptional! Thanks for being my sounding board and for pushing me to write faster!
A huge thank you to all of the fellow writers, readers and bloggers who I have met along this crazy ride, your friendship, support and encouragement has been truly appreciated. What an amazing community to be a part of
And to you reading this… I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You are helping me achieve my dream and for that I will be forever grateful. Thank you.
About the Author
Rachel Brookes is from a coastal town on the east coast of Australia where beaches, kangaroos and surfers roam free. She writes stories with a pinch of craziness, a dash of drama, a cup of romance, a spoonful of sexiness and the main ingredient hot guys. Rachel sometimes forgets to eat, sometimes forgets to sleep and sometimes can’t remember the last time she cleaned her apartment but that’s because she is in a long term relationship with her laptop and they are constantly writing together. When she does step away from her laptop she can be found taking too many photos, making scrumptious cocktails, laughing at Adam Sandler movies and spending her time with her amazing family and friends.
Facebook: www.facebook.com/authorrachelbrookes
Twitter: @RachelBrookes_
Goodreads: www.goodreads.com/rachelbrookes
Blog: www.rachelbrookes.blogspot.com.au/
Email:
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Rachel Brookes, Just Breathe
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