“Jake, am I going to hell now?” Julie looked him square in the face. She needed to know the answer.
Jake was astounded. “Little lady, you’re not going to hell. Trucker has nothing to do with your soul and nobody has a purer soul than you.”
“Thank you.” She tipped her head to the side and truly smiled from the depths of her heart for the first time since all that mess came out. Jake pinched her cheek and smiled back.
“Just holler if you ever need me and not just for my amazing healing abilities. I’m here if you just need to talk. This is a hard world to be in . . . Julie, the safest place you can be is with Truck. You know too much now. Even if those crazy mind sweepers clean your mind, it’s still there just buried deep. The council will never let you live. Trucker will always protect you. You’re his now.” Jake gave her a quick kiss on the tip of her nose.
“How do I call you?” Julie asked as he vanished into thin air.
“Just whisper my name.” Julie heard in the wind as it whipped around her face.
Julie unable to move, thought about Jake’s warning, Catherine’s plea, and if Trucker would always protect her. All of it was too much for her. She was determined not to cry. Why not cry? I find out the man I have given my heart to doesn’t even have a heart. His family and he belong to an elite band of demons. He shattered my wrist by a mere touch. Yes, I have every right to cry. She didn’t even care to wipe the tears away as they rolled down her face. She just hugged herself as she gave into the misery of the day.
She wasn’t sure how long she sat there and cried, but all of a sudden Trucker was there. He looked tired, haggard, his hair unkempt, he wasn’t right. She glanced at his eyes and the sinister look in them appeared sharp and vivid. She tried to remain sane and appear that all was normal. He set down beside her. With a clumsy swipe of her hand, she wiped the tears from her face.
“Baby, don’t cry.” He placed his arm around her. “I’m the same guy. The only thing that has changed is now you know.”
She squeezed his knee more to feel his skin than to comfort him. His skin blazed
.
“I have every right to cry. The world as I knew it is gone and I’m left with.” Putting her head on his shoulder, she let out a sigh. “I don’t know what I’m left with.”
“You’re left with me.” He winked at her and her heart melted for the umpteenth time. The tears still flowed freely, but she felt the corners of her lips turn up.
“That’s enough.”
A big angelic smile shot across Trucker’s face making him look every bit an angel.
“Are you still staying tonight?” He sounded skeptical.
“Yeah,” she answered. The one thing she was sure of was she wanted to be with him.
“Why?” he asked.
“I need to be with you, to prove to you I want to be with you.” She knew what she had to do; she just didn’t know if she was ready. “I need to learn about your world. I’m ready now.”
He looked at Julie surprised, unsure, “Are you sure? It’s not an easy world to live in,” he warned.
“As long as I have you, I’m ready for anything. Thanks to Jake, I know where I belong now.” She jumped down and snuggled up between his legs. “I belong to you.”
He laughed. “Jake talked to you? I should’ve known. Did he kiss you too?”
She didn’t know how to answer him. She knew he had jealously issues, but he was also laughing. “Yeah, just a quick peck,” she answered, tapping Trucker’s nose.
“That’s how Jake eases your nerves. Jake is full of tricks.”
“I think you have a few tricks up your sleeve too.”
“Yeah, I do. Angel.” He pushed her hair off her face and pulled her bottom lip out of the death grip her teeth had on it. “I’ll tell you everything no holds bar, but only as the occasion arises, deal?”
His eyes sparkled. Julie was seeing the happy side of Trucker. He likes me in his world. Surely, I’m doing the right thing. Please God, forgive me and lead me on the right path. Please don’t let me be too late. I know he was just, well God, save us both.
“You were . . . in your room?” she asked twisting her mouth, and leaning her body against his to feel his cooling skin and smell his aroma.
“Yeah, my love, I was in my demonic form,” he answered.
“Why?”
“Emotions affect me differently than humans. I can’t take much. It’s been a very hard day on me too.” He looked away and clicked his tongue in shame.
She reached over to pull his face down to hers. “It’s okay, it’s who you are. Can I ever see you like that?”
“No,” he said. “It’s too dangerous.” He took a deep breath and stared intently into her eyes. “Julie,” he spoke directly but soft. “Anytime it gets too much, stop me. Deal?”
“Yeah.” She started toying with the buttons on his shirt. He gazed at the button she was fiddling with as he traced shapes with his fingers on her back. “Can I see your wings?”
“Yeah,” Trucker replied. All of the sudden she was covered in black downy feathers as he wrapped his wings around her. Each unbelievable soft feather tickled across her body as she smiled up at Trucker’s face. She loved to see how his eyes lit-up with his laughter.
He held her like that for the longest time, letting their nerves ease. Unaware of everything around her except the softest of his wings, Julie started nibbling on her lip again. Trucker flicked his thumb over her chin reminding her to stop.
“Why does that bother you?” she asked.
He groaned. “My dad always bites his lip when he hurts me or anyone for that matter.” He sighed. “I couldn’t take you hurting me . . . you’re the only person who could truly hurt me.”
Her heart bled for him. He had suffered so much in his short life. She slid her hand down the front of his shirt wishing she could take his pain away and make him whole. Wiggling her finger between the buttons on his shirt, she stroked one button with the pad of her thumb.
“That’s my favorite? The one I can’t get enough of.”
“Favorite what?” she asked, stroking his face.
“My favorite one of your tics . . . When you get nervous, your little habits of either biting your nails, sucking on that lip, and now playing with the buttons on my shirt.” He slid his thumb over her lip, before grasping her hand.
“Is that why you always wear button-up shirts?”
“That’s certainly one of them. I like it when you get comfort from me,” he answered as his wings receded.
“Always.” She put her head back on his chest. He crushed her to his body, and buried his nose in her hair.
Chapter 12
Since the first day she met Trucker Castleman, he could make her obey his commands with just a look. Julie found it impossible to ignore that part of her that wanted to give him anything he craved. Curled in his arms, she realized that giving him his desire was what made her heart sing. But her mind consistently reminded her, that she needed to guard that heart.
He went to kiss her but stopped just short of her mouth. His eyes never left hers, not even for a second. “Would you take a walk with me?” he breathed against her skin, but still never made contact.
Julie cut her eyes over at the vast woodlot behind his house and was horrified of being alone with him in the confines of the woods. She also knew if she was ever going to save him, she had to be alone with him. “Yeah,” she answered. “Do you need to change shirts?”
“The holes are no biggie. I’ll change later.” He jumped down and gently held her against him. She felt every one of his hard muscle pressed to her, his steamy hot breath on her face. “I lied to you,” he whispered, sucking her earlobe between his teeth and tugging on it. “I can’t let you go. I’ll never let you go.”
Her heart went into spasms. She should have been scared. A demon was holding her and taking ownership. She should have been but she wasn’t. The thought of never feeling his fingers crawling up her spine as he nibbled on
her collarbone was worse than any fate she could think of. She pulled him toward the woods.
They walked hand and hand through the trees. Both aware they could handle anything.
“My family is a member of a band of demons called the Brotherhood of the Oni.” He turned over a leather bracelet that he always wore and showed her the ornate crest on it. “That’s their symbol. It’s an honor and privilege in my society to be a member. My dad is their leader.” He scrutinized her face. She was so numb; her face appeared dumbfounded. Her eyes widened as a fleeting thought came over her.
“My bracelet?”
“Claims you as mine.” He raised her hand and kissed her wrist. “None of my kind can touch you as long as you wear this talisman.” He turned the bracelet over and pointed to the clasp. It was shaped like a crown with a tiny diamond on each of the six arches. “That’s my symbol. My kind can see this a mile away. There is none of us that is brave enough to mess with my girl.” He placed his hand around her wrist completely covering the bracelet. “I have to protect you. As long as you wear this none of us can hurt you, even me. Please, Angel, always wear it. It would destroy me if something was to happen to you.”
She rubbed the cross necklace around her neck that was once her grandma’s as she realized she was wearing the symbol of one of the greatest evil around her wrist. Her heart and mind were in complete conflict. “It won’t will it?”
“Won’t want?”
“Nothing will happen to me?”
“No,” he answered and shook his head. “No one is brave enough to hurt the prince’s woman?”
“The prince?”
“I’ve been their prince since the day I was born. A prophet predicted a great leader that was half human-half demon. My dad was the most powerful demonic figure there was, so he found a willing human, and nine months later there was me.” Trucker hesitated and traced the contour of her ear. “Baby, their story is not ours. I’m half human. I have human qualities. Our relationship is not a game but true feelings.” He swiftly but ever so lightly crushed her to him. “Matter of fact, it throws a wrench into everything. I was born to take a powerful position in politics. The perfect mate for me to carry out my mission was even foreseen.”
“Emily,” Julie gasped.
“Yeah, my sweet love, she was born to be my partner. She’s been raised to be the perfect mate. The best way for evil to infiltrate the world is for evil to take over their government and businesses. I’m half human so I understand humans. My demonic bloodline is from some of the most powerful demons ever. I’m the perfect person to wreak havoc on the world and for the world to not know what hit it.”
Trucker released her and walked over to a huge oak tree. Julie watched intently as he stood there, staring out over the horizon. He was so still he appeared to be turning into stone. That is why Julie jumped when in an unnatural speed he broke off an oversized limb on a nearby tree and impelled it across the tree line. In a blur, Trucker was at Julie’s side again and had her secured in his arms. She wrapped her hand around his forearm and stroked her fingertips along the underside. She could feel his tendons running along his arms and his muscles that were twitching uncontrollably.
“Do you care about Emily?” she asked and squashed her face against his chest.
Trucker’s lips parted as he inhaled sharply. He released her, his eyes darted around. They grazed across every object around them, everything but Julie.
“I understand. She gets you,” Julie said with her heart splitting in two.
“She gets part of me.” He paused and kicked some loose leaves around. “She has always been in my life, but she means nothing compared to you.” He shook his head and reached for her hand. “Nobody but you matters.”
“It’s okay,” Julie said, but it wasn’t okay. Emily was a malicious, heinous monster and he cared about her.
“Baby, it’s not what you think. No, I don’t care about her. It’s hard to explain. She saved me, when I turned.” He narrowed his eyes, his chest beginning to heave with labored breathing. “I didn’t understand what was happening to me. I was fourteen years old. I had all these raging hormones, then this evil came alive in me. She showed me how to deal with it all. But baby.” He combed his fingers through her hair. “You’ve saved me completely.”
“Emily, is she friend or foe?”
“Foe, she is one hundred percent demon and only cares about what is in it for her. Angel, never invite her in your home, make sure your parents never let her in too.”
“Why?”
“Sin can’t enter a place without first being invited in.”
She thought back to the first day he came to her home and his warning about inviting sin in.
“That’s another vampire myth?” she asked.
“It’s another me thing,” he said with a smug smile and a shrug of his left shoulder.
“Sure you’re not a vamp. It might be easier to swallow then the prince of darkness thing.”
“Angel, there is no such thing as a vampire. Well, maybe except for the human variety, who bleed you dry for their own desires,” he stated nonchalantly with a robust laugh.
“I thought there was no such things as you too,” she said sarcastically, his laughter suddenly bothered her.
“I promise no vampires, werewolves, or even ghost. People take some of our traits and put them on their monsters. It is better to imagine a monster that was once human with human traits. Better than us, just pure evil, no human characteristics at all.”
She was taken aback by the causal way he spoke about it all. “You have human characteristics.” She needed to see those characteristics and soon.
“Yes, but I’m a rarity. I’m half human. Angel, my kind have no redeeming qualities don’t trust anyone.”
“Jake is neutral?” She wanted to change the subject. She sat down on a fallen tree to give her some space from him. He sat down beside her without touching her.
“Yes, he helps the bad and good, so no humans can learn of our plans. The world is a balance between good and evil. It has leaned one way or another at times, but it has always revolved around not realizing where it comes from. Jake and others like him are here for the greater good.”
Struck by his tremendous beauty, she blurted out. “Demons are supposed to be grotesque, not beautiful?”
He laughed again. “That’s the world’s view. It wants us to be. So you weak humans can avoid us. The truth is reversed. We’re beautiful, bewitching, appealing like sin. Your Jake is average looking, right?”
She nodded her head.
“Because he can go both ways, he’s the middle ground. Angels are ugly, odd, unappealing. Think about bad and good, which one is more fun, more appealing? Which one is hard, less appealing?”
“You call me angel all the time because I am unappealing?” She didn’t know why, but it hurt her when he described that. He moved closer to her.
“No, baby, I call you that because of your goodness. I can see auras.” His voice cracked as confusion washed over her face. “Do you know what that is?”
“I’ve heard of it, it’s your mood, what you radiate from your true self.”
“Exactly, I can see everyone’s auras. I’ve never in my life seen an aura as pure as yours . . . it’s blinding, it hurts.”
“You feel that horrible pain every time I touch you?” Julie cringed thinking about the burn she felt as he’d ran his fingers down her arm.
“Yeah, my sweet Angel, it feels like a thousand little bee stings. It hurts so damn bad, it’s hard to breathe sometimes.”
“Why do you touch me then?”
“I love your touch.”
“Why?”
“Because baby, your touch does things to me I never dreamed possible. As painful as it is physically, the mental pain of not having your touch is unbearable.” He leaned in, she thought he was going to kiss her but he paused. He pushed the hair off her face, nudged her neck with his nose, and inhaled deeply. “When you asked me to go to churc
h with you? The pain would’ve been so severe I would have come unglued.” He linked his fingers with hers. That simple gesture meant the world to her. The thought that her touch physically hurt him was unnerving, but even through the pain he still craved her. She scooted closer to him and placed her head on his shoulder, and marveled at his skins coolness. After that day, she assumed it would’ve been scalding.
“I know when you’re hot, your other side is taking over.”
“You do?” he asked, surprised.
She clasped her hand around his knee, taking in the natural humanly warmth of his skin. “Thank you for being in control with me now.”
“It’s easier when I’m not hiding who I am. I knew it would be easier when you finally knew, but I didn’t know I would like it so much. I don’t want to keep anything from you ever again.” His face lit up with the most beautiful smile. His eyes were glowing, but she could still see the malicious look his eyes had.
“What do I see in your eyes?” she asked as she laid her head against is forearm.
“The eye is the lamp of the body. The window to your soul.” He closed his eyes. Shaking, he pulled her close to his side. She wanted to yell and tell him, that was not true. It might be a window to the evil in him, but his soul was bright and good. She had to believe that because his soul was what she was fighting for.
“Truck, why can I see the look in your eyes but no one else seems too?”
“I don’t know.” He cupped her jaw and rubbed the pad of his thumb over her bottom lip. “It’s never happened before. Only you have ever seen who I truly am.”
“What?” Julie asked and raised one eyebrow.
“We kind of hypnotize people. They see what they want to see, all their desires, their hopes. That’s one of the ways we are most dangerous; we make you believe we are the answers to all your problems, but in reality, we are the problem,” he answered. He turned his head so she couldn’t see his eyes. “Only you,” he said with a shake of his head.
“I like what I see,” she muttered. His eyes met hers.