He rolled one shoulder, not quite a shrug, more like trying to dislodge an uncomfortable weight. “I think so.”
“Great,” I said. “Just fab. And what if what Jingo Jingo said is true—if Dad’s been carving out holes in my head, preparing me all my damn life for him to possess me—what does that mean? I can’t live with him in my head my entire life. But if the only reason we don’t self-destruct is because Dad’s in me, what are we supposed to do? Stop using magic forever? Stop being with each other? I will not give up on you because of magic, Zay.”
He was in front of me so fast, I swear I didn’t see him move. He put his hands gently on both of my arms.
“Then don’t. We’ll find a way to remove your dad from your head. As soon as we deal with Leander and Isabelle and make magic safe to use again, then we can figure out how you and I can be together without him. If that means giving up magic, then, yes, I will give up magic for you.”
I nodded, knowing he had just told me he’d give up the life he had built for himself to be with me.
“I don’t want you to give up magic for me, Zay. Not out of fear of what might happen. I’m just tired. I don’t want to fight Leander and Isabelle to the death. I don’t want to have to…kill Shame and Terric. I still can’t deal with what…what I did to Bartholomew Wray. And Collins said this is war and a lot of people are going to die. I’m not a leader…not really, not with this much at stake. The entire city. The world. I’m just…” I shook my head. “Nothing.”
Zay gently tipped my chin up, the fingers of his hand warm against my jaw, his other hand on my hip. Magic, caught in whorls through my skin, heated at his touch, straining to be nearer him.
“You are not nothing.”
“How would you know?”
“Because I know what you have done. You saved Cody when he was just a stranger to you. You killed Lon Tragger and stood up to a Death magic user who was killing girls to use magic. You fought a Necromorph, and walked through a gate into death to bargain with my captor to bring me back to life. No matter what has been thrown at you, you have found a way forward, found a way to fight for innocent people to stay alive, for the Hounds to find pride in their work and each other, and for Portland to remain safe.”
I was shaking my head. I knew all those things he said were true, but were they enough?
“And,” he said, “because you are mine. As long as you want to be. We will walk this to the end. We will find our way, and a way to get rid of your father. This fight? That’s right now. Just right now.”
“Promise?” I searched his gaze, soft brown, heated by gold.
He brushed his thumb down my cheek. “With my dying breath.”
I swallowed back something that felt a lot like tears. “Thank you.”
I wanted to say more, to tell him how much I loved him. But if I kissed him right now, there was no way I was going to be able to let go and face everything else we needed to do. Things we should have done hours ago.
I stepped away.
Zayvion stepped with me, his hand never leaving my hip. “Allie.”
I knew he saw the fear in my eyes, saw my very uncertain need to be with him and my certainty that I should not be. Not now.
Then he kissed me, gently, his lips pressing softly against just the corner of my mouth. Before I could return the kiss, he whispered, “There are a whole lot of tomorrows ahead of us. And I plan on spending every damn one of them with you.”
That certainty, his firm belief that we were going to have our happily ever after no matter what, did me a lot of good.
I nodded, and we both pulled away, the distance between us much easier to bear. Which was good. We had a lot to take care of. “I’ll call for someone to see to her body,” I said, walking toward the door.
Zay didn’t follow me. I glanced back. He was staring at the wall. I followed his gaze to the shelves inset there.
And on those shelves were Void stones.
I knew exactly what he was thinking.
“Will they help?” I asked, stepping over to the other wall where more Void stones were displayed as art, jewelry, and just plain stones. I gathered up as many as I could carry. A strange numbing relief flowed out from those stones, like a balm on a burn. It was kind of wonderful.
“They might,” he said. “One way to find out.”
We hurried out of the inn, our hands loaded with Void stones of every size and style, from the plain gray pet rock–looking thing, to the polished and really quite beautiful stones set into necklaces, bracelets, and rings.
The Void stones had helped me when I was having trouble controlling magic. It made sense that they could help Shame and Terric too.
We left the building and Zay locked it before slamming the door shut. We marched through the grass to the van. Zay got in the driver’s seat and I stepped up into the passenger’s side.
“What took you so long?” Collins asked. It didn’t sound like he cared what I answered.
“Void stones,” I said, turning and crawling back toward Shame and Terric while Zay got the van moving. “Help me with them.”
“You stole them?” Suddenly Collins was alert and more than willing to help me place Void stone necklaces on Shame and Terric, latch bracelets on their wrists, and set stones on their laps, at their feet, and beside them on the seat.
Eleanor hovered just behind where Shame was sitting, and placed her fingers on the Void stone necklace against the back of his neck. Shame shivered, but his blank stare didn’t falter. I didn’t know if he was aware of the stones around him, but he could at least in some manner sense Eleanor’s ghost.
“Borrowed.” I braced as Zay made a hard left.
Zay was trying to make up for some lost time by breaking the speed limit. “Faith well, right?” I asked.
“That’s the plan,” he said.
My phone rang, and I shook my hands to clear the soft numbness from handling the Void stones, then planted myself back in the front seat and pulled the phone out of my pocket. “Beckstrom.”
“Seattle’s on the road and furious,” Davy said. It sounded like he was running. “Go, go!” A car door slammed behind him and all I could hear was clattering, squealing wheels, and something that sounded like the cell phone hitting the ground.
“Still there?” Davy asked.
“What’s going on?”
“They’re headed into Portland. Should make the city limits in a half hour. We’ll do what we can.”
“Stay low,” I said. “Stay out of sight.”
“They’ll never see us coming.”
“No. Davy, no. That’s not what I mean. Stay out of their range. Do not fight them.”
He hung up.
“Davy says more from Seattle are headed to the city. Half an hour out,” I said.
Zay took a hard turn and crossed three lanes to hit an exit.
“What are you doing?” I asked as soon as we were on four wheels again.
“Heading to the Life well.”
“All the way out to Multnomah Falls?” I asked. “Faith well. We’re supposed to be headed to the Faith well. Southwest. Under the Japanese Gardens. Not headed east.”
“Seattle’s coming into the city,” he said. “Life well is the farthest out. We need to purify it and close it, lock it, to take it out of play. Faith and Death wells are close enough we can get to each of them fast after the Life well is closed.”
“So, change of plans,” I said.
I could call Kevin and tell him to get a car out to the falls to take Shame and Terric back, and tell him to send me two more people who could help us with the wells, but we didn’t have the time to wait for them.
Maybe I’d tell Terric and Shame to stay in the car. They should be fine with the Void stones if they didn’t try to cast magic. I had cast magic twice. It hurt, but maybe I could take up some of the slack. Between Collins, Zayvion, and me, we still might be able to do this.
I glanced over my shoulder. Shame was staring straight ahead, like he?
??d just had a front-row-seat view of the end of the world. Terric’s eyes were closed, though I thought I saw a glimmer of a tear slipping down his jaw.
Okay, maybe they wouldn’t be fine. But they probably wouldn’t cause themselves, or anyone else, damage if we left them in the car. I guess I could leave Collins in the car to keep an eye on them.
No. We’d need at least three of us to purify the well. Zay, Collins, and me, and of course, my dad.
Dad, I thought, we’re going to need you to be ready for this.
Nothing.
Dad?
Okay. So it might just be me, Zayvion, and Collins. Yes, I could use magic again. I hoped. But I hadn’t paid close enough attention to the spells Dad used to get the magic out of Stone. I didn’t know if I could do this without him.
I glanced at the speedometer. Zayvion was at a hundred miles an hour and climbing. It felt like the miles crawled by. Finally, finally, he turned into the parking area. We’d have to cross under the train trestle to get to the well.
Zay parked and turned off the engine. He got out of the van and so did I, pulling open the van side door.
“You’re staying—” I said to Terric.
“We are not.” Terric pushed his way past me. His shoulder brushed against mine and sent a weird numbing tingle down my spine. Not magic. Rather, the lack of it. He was covered in Void stones. So many that even a brush felt like a cool breeze sucking magic away from me.
Terric turned so he was facing the inside of the van, blocking Collins’ and Stone’s exit.
“Shame,” Terric said, “we have work to do.”
Shame didn’t budge, didn’t move an inch. He was still sitting stiff and straight, staring without blinking. Eleanor had moved to sit between him and the window. She seemed a little less sad, and a little more curious as she considered him in profile. She put her hand hesitantly on his shoulder and he twitched at the contact.
One of the traits all good Hounds learn quickly is how to read lips. I couldn’t hear Eleanor, but I knew she said, “Shame. You have to go.”
Shame shivered just slightly. I knew he could hear her.
“Terric,” I said. “Maybe you should give Shame some time.”
“Maybe you should let me handle this.” Terric flared, gold white, and the Void stones heated red before expelling that cool breeze sensation again. He wasn’t glowing anymore.
Didn’t mean he wasn’t angry.
Terric was a nice guy. Someone I counted as one of my closest friends. Magic had changed him. Yeah, well, welcome to the club.
This angry-killer look wasn’t anything magic had done to him. I was pretty sure that was just Terric, pissed off and ready to fight anything unlucky enough to get in his way.
I hoped that included the magic he tried to use.
Stone pushed his big head against Terric’s arm and Terric moved aside enough for him to tromp out of the van. Collins slid out behind him, carefully avoiding touching Terric.
“Nice place for an ambush,” Collins noted, staring up at Multnomah Falls caught by moonlight as it tumbled down against the cliff side on the other side of the railroad trestle and parking lot.
I took a couple of steps away from the van. Zay came around from the front and walked up to Terric. “You’re both staying here.”
Terric ignored him. “Shame.” He reached into the van and touched Shame’s wrist. A Void stone rattled and rolled toward the back of the seat.
Shame turned his head. Looked at Terric. His eyes were more black than green, but there was no anger in them. Actually, there was no emotion on his face at all. He just looked broken. Blank.
Sweet hells.
“This isn’t over for us,” Terric said. “We can’t change what we’ve done. But we don’t have time to deal with the fallout. Not now. You’ve been here before, Shame. Been to this darkness. You lost control of magic like this, when you broke me, broke my ability to use magic when we were younger. You almost killed me. Would have if Zay hadn’t stopped you.
“You found your way out of that darkness. You found your way to a place of sanity. Without my help. I’m here to help you this time.
“So pull yourself the fuck together, Flynn. You can cry over the horror later. Flynns don’t give up. Flynns come up swinging. You told me that. You told me Flynn blood isn’t smart enough to know when to stop fighting. And right now, we need that. Need you. Because we have a war to fight. More than just a handful of lives are on the line. I’m not going to sit this fight out. You damn well better not either.”
Shame tipped his head down; his shoulders slumped.
“I’m going in there without you,” Terric said. “So are Zay and Allie. Are you going to sit in the car and cry?”
Shame lifted his head. “Hate you,” he rasped.
“I know.” Terric held out his hand.
Shame took it and pulled himself out of the van. He stood next to Terric for a minute and seemed to suddenly notice all the rocks hanging from his neck and wrists.
He nodded, absently, not taking any of them off. “You think this will do any good?” There was no tone in his voice, no emotion. He was on his feet, but he sure as hell wasn’t all together yet.
“It won’t hurt,” Terric said. “Plus, if you try that shit you did back there again, I will knock you on your ass.”
Shame didn’t say anything, didn’t glare, didn’t flip Terric off. He just stood there, as if waiting to be told what to do next. As if all the fire in him had been snuffed out.
It was strange. Frightening to see him like this. Just as frightening as seeing him mindlessly drinking down the dead.
“Enough talking,” Zay said. “Let’s close this well.”
Chapter Eleven
Zay and I jogged across the parking lot. Stone seemed to think we’d come out to play some kind of running game and was zipping around all of us like a race car doing laps. Each time he passed by me he made a little happy croon, which just made him sound like a tiny train zooming by with its whistle stuck.
I didn’t look back to check on Shame and Terric or Collins, but from the sound of footfalls, they were all right behind us.
There were only a few people leaving the parking lot since it was completely dark now. They looked our way, probably surprised to see a gargoyle running around like a dog off a leash. Not that I cared. No time for stealth. No time for secrets.
We’d gotten the word out not to use magic. We’d gotten the word out that magic was getting shut down. But that hadn’t stopped people from coming to see the falls.
We jogged past the parking area, past the espresso stand, up the concrete pathway that wound between green ferns and moss to our right and trees and scrub to our left with nothing but moonlight to guide us. Hit the bridge at the midpoint of the falls.
I slowed, because, damn, I was hurt, tired, and out of shape. I did manage to keep it to a fast walk as we took the next rise in the hill.
Zay slowed too, probably more for my burning lungs than for his own limitations.
No matter how fast we ran up this hill, then down those damn stairs to the well, there was no chance we’d get back to town before the rest of the people from Seattle got there first.
Unless the Hounds managed to trip them up, slow them down.
Maybe. Davy sounded like he was on the chase behind them, not in front of them. And Hounds weren’t the sort of people who gave up easily.
Zay stopped, and I nearly ran into his wide back.
We must have reached the doorway to the Life well. I never could recognize the exact spot where it was hidden in the hillside.
I stepped to the side of the trail while Zay drew magic from the well to cast an Illusion in case someone came upon us, although it was unlikely so late at night. Then he cast the spell that would reveal the doorway in the side of the hill that would lead down to the well.
“Very nice,” Collins said, a little out of breath. “This is well hidden.”
Great. This must be part of the memori
es he’d had Closed and taken away from him by the Authority.
Shame and Terric didn’t look tired. Standing there, blank darkness and brooding light, they weren’t even breathing hard.
Even better, the darkness and light around them was very subtle. The Void stones were doing a good job of keeping the magic that was available to them dampened.
Of course, neither of them was actually trying to draw on magic. I had a feeling if they did, not even the half-dozen Void stones they each wore would be enough to slow them down.
The door opened and we all stepped through it onto the platform at the top of the stairs.
Terric flipped on the light switch and electric lights flickered to life all the way down the staircase, shining wet and yellow against the stone walls.
Stone burbled, still standing outside on the trail.
“Come on, Stone,” I said. “This isn’t going to hurt.”
His ears flapped back, and then up, his wings stretched.
“Come on, boy,” I said again as I started down the stairs. “Let’s do magic.”
He finally clambered in, then pushed past me, so that I had to hug the wooden rail. Stone galloped down the stairs, with his very humanlike hands wrapping around each step as he went, his wings out for balance.
I took the stairs as fast as I could, trying not to think about having to run back up the damn things in a few minutes.
At the bottom of the stairs, I stopped to get my breathing in order while Zay unlocked the big double doors with that ribbonlike spell that spooled out from his fingertips.
Then he slammed the doors open and strode into the room. “Terric, you think you can open this one?”
If Terric was surprised by Zay asking for his help, the only indication of it was a slight pause in his step. “Should be able to.”
“Then you do that,” Zayvion said. “Shame, I’ll want you to close it. Allie, you and your dad will purify the well with Stone. Collins, you and I handle Shield and Ground and anything else we might need. Let’s make it fast.”
Terric pulled off the stones on his wrist, and then the three he wore around his neck. He handed all of those to Shame. “If I turn this place into a rain forest, stop me.”