“I know you won’t. You keep your own secrets, don’t you? I see them floating across your eyes when you’re thinking really hard.”
I had a whole bunch of them. “Do you want one of mine?”
“I…”
A knock sounded on the door. Maven called through the door, “Come on, sleepyhead. We have garbage to get out of the gardens. Sorry to wake you, Giovanna.”
Chance stepped back. He walked to his closet and dressed. Jeans. A t-shirt and a sweatshirt with his SPiI letters on it. A black coat. Socks and boots. All of it was done super fast. I was impressed. I couldn’t put on clothes that quickly.
He finally spoke. “Another time if you want to share, I’ll listen. It’s what friends do. I’m guessing yours aren’t an illustration all over your back. What will you do today?”
“The literary magazine, and I’ll read. It’s icy, so I guess I’m not jogging.”
He pointed to the floor. “Back of the basement, behind the dance floor, there’s a brown door. The gym is in there. Couple of treadmills. Bikes. Weights. Have at it. No need to worry about falling. Put on one of those pins that’s on the treadmill, so if you do fall, it turns off.”
I nodded. “I will. Thanks.”
“See you later.” He bent over to kiss me on the lips.
And just like that, he was gone. With the door open, I heard his footsteps going down the stairs; Banyan said something and then laughter; the door opening and closing. I was alone in the SPiI house.
I texted the girls. Did everyone have a nice Christmas?
Neither my books nor the literary entries seemed appealing. I put on my shorts, a bra, a white t-shirt, socks and sneakers before I made my way down to the basement. I stopped in my tracks. Chance had said dance floor, and he hadn’t been kidding. They had a dance floor the size of a ballroom, complete with a DJ booth that was above the floor, like a box in a theater. Lights of all different colors hung from the ceiling. More rooms than I bothered to count were attached, leading who knew where. The house was huge upstairs. I should have realized the basement would be the same.
They didn’t just party here… they partied.
I shook my head. Just when I thought I got comfortable with everything, I found myself having to readjust again. SPiI wasn’t just this place where guys bonded in brotherhood and became better people than they used to be. It was where people came to party with them. There were reasons I’d designed my life to be quiet.
I was really, really bad at parties.
Well, there wasn’t one at the moment. I followed Chance’s instructions and found the gym. The treadmill called my name. By the time I had run three miles, I wasn’t worried about the dance floor. Whatever they wanted to do was not my business. I was figuring out this friendship with the three of them, but I suspected it would have nothing to do with this.
I took the stairs two at a time and used their shower again. This time, I styled my unruly hair and tried to dress like I cared what I looked like. I wasn’t always a mess. I didn’t think.
The girls had answered my text, and I read their responses. Molly griped a little bit about R.J. being distracted, but otherwise, everyone was fine. Maybe she’d break up with him. I kept hoping.
It was lunchtime, and I was still not interested in what I should be doing. The main dining hall was open, so I walked over to it and bought a bunch of sandwiches. The guys needed to get hours in to make their community service happen. I’d bring them something to eat.
For a small school of two thousand people, the campus was actually quite spread out. Between the walk to the dining hall and the walk to the garden area, I added a mile to the three miles I’d traveled that day.
The gardens looked like they’d been half cleaned. Who had made such a mess of them to begin with? I could imagine the dreaded Dean Brown throwing his trash all over them just to give the guys something to do on the otherwise immaculate campus. Well, immaculate other than my burned dorm. I shuddered. I’d love to never have to get out of a building on fire again. For the rest of my life.
“Hey.” Maven saw me first and waved. “Come to see us in all our glory?”
He set down the trash bag he was holding as the other two turned around. “Came to feed you.”
I held up the bag I’d brought. Banyan grinned from ear-to-ear. “The woman is a goddess.”
“Thank you.” Maven stretched his arms over his head. “We’ll take it.”
“Did you walk here?” Chase pointed at me like I didn’t know who the you referred to. “After you went to the dining hall?”
I nodded, approaching them. “Yes.”
“There’s ice all over the ground.” A muscle ticked in his jaw. “It’s dangerous, Vonni. If you fell, there might not be anyone around for hours or even days to see you needed help.”
“Hey.” Banyan patted his back. “She’s okay. I get it. But she’s okay.”
Chance looked away. “Thank you for lunch. Sorry for the attitude.”
That wasn’t attitude. That was fear. “I stuck to the sidewalks that were salted.” I lifted my left foot. “Wearing my boots. I didn’t mean to frighten you. I just wanted to feed you because you guys have been feeding me.”
Chance’s gaze warmed. “I’ve clearly got an issue with this because of my mom. Thank you for lunch, Vonni.”
“I know. It’s okay.” I handed him a wrapped sandwich.
Maven looked between us. “Glad he told you about his mom so I don’t have to try to talk around why my brother here just lost his mind.”
“If you want to go somewhere and there is ice on the ground, could you call or text me? I’ll come and get you, or one of these two will.”
I handed Banyan and Maven their sandwiches. “Well, I could. But I don’t have your cell numbers.”
“That,” Banyan said as he pulled out his phone, “we have to fix. Here, I’ll put us all in your phone. You put yourself in mine and then share the contact with these two.”
My mom liked to study moments in cultures that held significance. To do A, meant B. Like in Judaism, to have a bar mitzvah was to be considered a man. At our little college, to exchange numbers really meant we were friends. I was officially in their contact lists, and they were in mine.
“Need some help?” I pointed to the mess. “I bet after lunch, four people could clean this better than three.”
I highly suspected this was so slow moving because these three SPiI brothers had never cleaned anything like this in their life. I had. For once, I could be useful to them.
Chapter 7
I sat on the couch in the SPiI house next to Maven, with Banyan on my other side. Chance sat across from us, his feet up on the table. We were all pretty tired and frozen from our day outside cleaning. But the garden was beautiful now. It would bloom in the spring without any garbage to mar its beauty, assuming no one else dumped their stuff there.
“Who is keeping track of your hours?” The thought dawned on me.
Maven raised his hand. “Me. Dean Brown said he trusted me to be an upstanding human being.”
Banyan laughed. “Boy did he know how to motivate you.”
“I do tend to respond to people saying they trust me. I know I’m manipulated that way.” He groaned. “It’s like my kryptonite.”
He had just made a geek reference. I grinned. “I wouldn’t have pegged you as a comic book guy. Or is it just the movies?”
“You should see his room at home.” Chance raised his eyebrows. “Mister Suave here has comic books all over his room.”
“A Superman reference is mild for me. If I get going, I start talking about really obscure characters only I know, and then it’s all downhill from there.” He nudged me. “Don’t judge.”
I held up my hands. “Never. Do you fudge the times at all? Like maybe you could shave ten minutes here and there.”
“No.” Chance shook his head. “He’d never do that. Never lies unless it’s to protect someone. Never cheats. We’ll do every minute and mayb
e ten more if he thinks there might be question about whether or not he’s done it correctly.”
Maven didn’t argue. “Correct. They’d be the same way.”
That was interesting. “What are you all going to do tonight?”
Chance smiled. “What are you going to do?”
“I’m probably going to go to a movie. That tends to be what I do. I study. I go to the movies. I read. Pretty boring.” I pointed downstairs. “That’s quite a dance floor you have down there.”
Banyan nudged my foot. “Don’t dance?”
“Not if I can help it.”
Maven stood. “Looks like we’re all going to the movies tonight.”
“You guys don’t have to. It’s within walking distance and”—I made eye contact with Chance—“I’ll be very careful.”
Banyan put his arm around me. “Nothing for it, sweetheart. We’re all going to the movies, and we’re going to do this incredible thing—we’re going to drive there because that will keep us warmer. I like my car. I only see it when I’m at school. No need for the car in the city. We’re going to use mine.”
“I like my car, too.” Maven rolled his eyes. “And you spent most of high school in boarding school in Connecticut. You used your car there. I am the only one out of the three of us who actually spent time living in Manhattan. Having your mailing address there doesn’t count. You two got to drive. I had to get my license to come to college.”
Banyan shrugged. “Still driving.”
They were funny. “I’m a really terrible driver. I mean really bad. I learned in Kenya, but then I didn’t drive for years. I’m just horrible at it.”
Chance leaned forward. “We may have to do something about that. Can’t have you getting hurt.”
“I almost never drive. So it’s not a problem.”
Maven pointed at the door. “Movies. Now. Before we all end up on this couch drinking beer, except for Giovanna with her water. And soon we’ll have corrupted her into doing nothing with us except sitting on the couch on nights we don’t have parties. She actually does things. Let’s do them, too.”
“You guys cleaned all day. It’s perfectly okay to sit on the couch.”
Banyan rose. “No, he’s right. Let’s go to the movies. When was the last time we went to the movies? Years?”
Chance shook his head. “I went last month. I took a girl out. It didn’t go well. Not the movie’s fault. I pissed her off when I didn’t like the movie. That was some sort of personal affront.”
Forty-five minutes later, I sat in the discount-for-students movie theater waiting to see the movie French Kiss with the three of them. For a dollar, the movie theater showed old movies once a week. I loved going, and Meg Ryan was a favorite of mine.
I wasn’t sure how this was going to go over with them, but they’d bought popcorn, candy, and soda. Plus, they seemed to be laughing at the right times. At one point, Banyan leaned over to whisper in my ear. “We could be in France by tomorrow.”
We’d had this back and forth already. Besides, it was amazing how much I could learn about someone in twenty-four hours. “You wouldn’t leave them here to do this without you.”
He squeezed my knee, and a jolt of pleasure traveled up my spine. “That’s true, sweetheart. That’s true. So when the community service is over in May, we could go.”
“Not unless I am paying for my half.” I shook my head. “Grand Canyon, remember?”
“Counting on it.”
Maven threw popcorn at Banyan. “Stop. Don’t talk during the movie.”
So we shut up.
I’d never been to Paris. Maybe someday I would go. But it wouldn’t be tomorrow. That was someone else’s fairytale, not mine. I’d never wanted to be that girl swept off her feet and taken care of. I just wanted to be wanted, wherever I was. That was all I needed in life. I never wanted to be anyone’s burden.
Not anymore.
I shook my head, turning my attention back to Meg. She was lost in Paris. I could think of worse places to be lost.
The sun had gone to bed by the time we came out of the movie. Maven pointed at a restaurant across the street. “I’ve been there. Do you like Italian, Giovanna?”
“I do, actually. As my first name might indicate, that’s my mom’s background. I love it.”
Maven nodded, his face very serious. “Then we have to drive to Manhattan, because the Italian food here is not good Italian food.”
“It’s edible. It’s open. The rest of the town is practically shut down until after New Year’s. Let’s go,” Banyan answered.
Maven had been right. The food was just fine, not great, but I ate my pasta and happily listened to the three of them talk. Maven seemed to be pretty serious. He would smile and laugh, but he didn’t make the jokes, which made the fact that he called me library out on the street pretty amazing. Why had he done that? Chance was charming, although every once in a while he’d get really quiet, his eyes far away. Either Maven or Banyan would bring him back to the present. Banyan made everyone laugh. He was sweet.
I fell into my usual routine, where I was comfortable: watching. If they spoke to me, I answered, but I didn’t start the conversations. I actually preferred it this way. Dinner was always pressure to impress with whatever I talked about. I’d rather listen. I could learn so much more that way.
No one asked me what was wrong. No one tried to get me to talk by asking pointed questions. I hated those moments. All I had to do was enjoy.
When the check came, all three of them reached for it. I pulled out my wallet. I’d been careful with what I ordered. I had that much to spend. Maven had bought the movie for everyone, and although I’d almost objected when he did it, I’d backed off. The other two didn’t seem to mind him doing it.
Banyan had the bill. “Wallet away, sweetheart.”
“Banyan, you don’t have to buy me dinner.”
He smiled, pulling out his credit card. “You bought me lunch.”
That was true. I had. I’d spent roughly the same on dinner so I put my money away. “That was a thank you.”
“Are you going to fight me on the ten dollars I spent on your chicken?”
I shook my head. “Thank you for dinner, Banyan.”
“You’re welcome.” He smiled like I’d really just given him a gift.
Chance sighed. “Thank you for dinner, Banyan.”
“Aw, fuck off.” Banyan threw a piece of bread at him, which made everyone laugh. “Come on. We’re going home.”
Home. I guessed it was for them. They’d been living in it for three years. It probably did feel like home. “Do all of the houses look like yours?”
Maven took my hand and led me toward the car. Snow fell slightly on our heads. “No. Ours is the nicest.”
“Well, obviously.” I laughed. “But what do the others look like?”
Chance answered. “We spend a lot of time keeping ours up. It needs paint on the outside, but we have cleaners who come after every party. It’s all part of our dues. The others are varying degrees of nice and disgusting and everywhere in between. Why do you ask?”
“My roommate, Molly, is always trying to get me to go to her boyfriend’s frat, DKI. I was just wondering what it looked like inside? She spends a lot of time there.”
Banyan opened the door. “Who’s her boyfriend?”
“His name is R.J. Winters.”
Banyan groaned. “Serious douchebag.”
“I hate him,” Maven agreed. “Sorry. He’s probably your friend right?”
“No, I hardly know him, actually.” And what I did know, I didn’t like. I got in the car at the same time as Chance, and Maven scooted in next to me.
Banyan got in the driver’s seat and stared back at the three of us. “Are you kidding with this? One of you has to sit up front. Come on Giovanna, you’re up. Sit next to me.”
“You wanted to drive, man.” Maven smirked. “Drive. Girl stays back here with me. She’s spending the night with you. I get to sit next to h
er.”
Chance shrugged. “She smells good. I’m not moving.”
He played with the end of my hair. I watched his fingers move slightly, remembering suddenly what he’d been doing with them this morning. Heat infused my cheeks.
“Fuck.” Banyan groaned. “I hate all of you.”
Maven kicked the back of his seat. “You know you don’t, bro. I’ll get up front.”
Banyan winked at me in the mirror. “Paris. Tokyo. You name it.”
I winked back at him. This was just a game, and we both knew it. It didn’t require a response from me. Maven got up front, and then we were off. Driving back to SPiI together like it was the most natural thing in the world for us to be doing.
“Guys, you know I’m not usually comfortable around people. I don’t talk very much. I’m not sure why it’s so easy with you, but I appreciate it. Feeling like this—easy, I guess—for just a short period of time is really wonderful.”
Maven turned around from the front seat. “It’s all because of me, library. I shouted at you on the street.”
“Oh come on.” Chance shifted a little until it occurred to me that I was still sitting in the middle of the backseat. That couldn’t be comfortable for him. I should move across. I undid my seatbelt to move, and he grabbed my belt, rehooking it. “Don’t do that. We’re driving. Not safe.”
“I thought you might not be comfortable having to be squished up against me. I wanted to give you more room.”
He shook his head. “I don’t want more room. Lean on me. Stay buckled.” He put his arm around me, and I did lean on him.
I waited for a flippant remark from either Maven or Banyan, but none came. They didn’t seem to react badly when Chance expressed safety concerns. Maybe they were just used to it, or maybe they understood so well what was behind it they’d never say a word. Did he tell them to be careful on the ice or was this just me?
We got back to the frat house, and they all headed up the stairs. Banyan took my hand. “You’re with me tonight, unless you’d rather not be. Always up to you.”
“I’m happy to come with you.”
He tugged me to his side. “Great.”