“What exactly are you seeing?” I saw nothing but darkness all around me.
“There’s Andromeda,” she was pointing, “and there’s Gemini, Delphinus, Cassiopeia, Pegasus, and of course all the falling stars from the comet…”
“But how are you doing it? Is it some sort of spell or enchantment?” I asked.
“No. I can see it because of who I am, and you can see it because of who you are. We are the daughters of the stars, and we have the power to connect with that energy at any time. This ceiling can no more separate you from your birthright, than your clothes can separate you from your skin.”
I sat up in stunned silence, not so much at what Sophie was saying, but how she was saying it. Instantly, she seemed to have transformed from a giggling teenager to a wise woman dispensing metaphysical metaphors.
“Okay, then, how do I do it? How can I see what you guys are seeing?” I asked eagerly. I noticed how much more quickly I had recovered from the latest shock of a new magical trick, and I wondered if soon there’d be anything that could surprise me.
“It’s easy, really. You just have to want to see it and know that you can. Just close your eyes and focus on connecting to the outside world. Imagine what it looks like from where you are right now, and what it would be like without all the artificial barriers blocking you in.”
I did as Sophie instructed, and lay back down on the bed with my eyes closed, feeling my body relax with every deep breath. I breathed deeper...deeper...letting my mind relax... focus... see...believe...
When I opened my eyes, the scene in my bedroom had dramatically changed. I gasped in awe of the cosmic splendor that far exceeded any vision my mind alone could create.
Although I was still lying in my bed, the ceiling of the bedroom had completely disappeared, and the walls were reduced to only a few feet in height. The open air created a magical portal to the celestial dome above, and millions of diamonds sparkled in the velvety darkness.
I’d stared at the evening sky countless times before, but it had never looked anything like this. The stars appeared huge, as if I were seeing them through a powerful telescope. Instead of a flat blanket of white specks all of the same size and color, these heavenly bodies had depth, and shone with a pulsating array of Technicolor hues. And there were so many of them! Each one seemed to have its own life force – its own heartbeat; some beat quickly, others with a slower thump, thump.
Shooting between the stationary stars and planets, streams of red-orange lights streaked like exploding fireworks across the sky. It looked like a shower of fiery ice raining down on the earth.
“This is…incredible,” I said, stunned. What a dumb word, ‘incredible’. A whole new word needed to be invented for what I was seeing and feeling.
“Pretty cool, huh?” Sophie asked. “There’s nothing like seeing it for the first time. You like?”
“I love! But…is this really real? Is this really happening, or am I just imagining it?” Never in my wildest dreams had I thought it possible for the sky to be this alive...like I could reach out and actually touch it.
“Oh, it’s very real,” Lily said. “It’s more real than what everyone else sees. Well, almost everyone.”
The three of us lay there together in silence, each entranced by the beauty of the night. As I slowly drifted off to sleep under the warm love from the heavens, my final thought was of Nicholas...wondering if he was seeing the same sky...and if I’d see him again in my dreams.
Chapter 15. Deeper
I float toward the shining, mystical grove. He is there. I feel his love surround me…warm, and comforting. He smiles and takes my hands, kissing me softly.
“Nicholas,” I whisper.
“Calista,” he whispers in return. “I’ve been looking for you.”
“You found me.” I say it silently, but he hears me.
He kisses me gently on the lips, as I hear his words float through my mind.
“I will always find you.”
Wrapped in his strong embrace, we sail through the starlit sky enveloped in a sea of love and happiness. Time has no meaning when I am with him, and I fight the familiar pull that threatens to separate us once again…
I feel myself falling away, I hear him one last time.
“Calista…my love…promise you’ll find me again…”
“I promise.”
And then he is gone.
***
I opened my eyes to the sounds of laughter, and the smell of burnt toast. Sophie and Lily were already awake, and from the sounds of it, were in the kitchen talking with my dad.
Grateful for the moment of solitude, I replayed the memories of Nicholas in my mind. A contented smile slowly spread over my face. The sensation of the dream was still as clear and vivid as if it had really happened, and I hugged my pillow close and imagined it was Nicholas I was holding. How good it felt to be with him! Even if it was only in my dreams…
Our nocturnal encounters happened with consistent regularity now; every night, Nicholas and I found each other.
I knew this was just my overactive, obsessed imagination, but so what? So what if it wasn’t real? It felt real...He felt real. That’s all that mattered, right? How was believing a fantasy any different than so-called ‘reality’? Really? Every night when I was in Nicholas’s arms, I felt his love as plainly as if it were real. So how was it not?
I let out a deep sigh and rolled over, noticing the date on the calendar. October 16...The day Calista McCoy went officially crazy.
I threw on some sweats and padded out into the kitchen area. My father stood by the stove, Lily sat on a barstool at the counter, and Sophie was on the couch by the patio doors.
“I just think that New York has a much better defense than Baltimore,” Lily was saying.
“Baltimore’s ground game has got much better since they drafted Walker, though. Can’t count them out,” Dad said as he scraped a pan with his spatula.
I felt like I’d stepped into the twilight zone. Dad cooking breakfast? Lily, a football fan?
“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Sophie said.
Dad looked up at me and smiled. “Mornin’, Sunshine. Thought I’d try my hand here at makin’ some eggs for y’all.”
I adjusted my glasses, convinced my eyes were playing tricks on me. I’d never seen my dad make so much as a bowl of cereal before.
“How long have you guys been awake?” I asked them.
“Not long, just a few minutes,” Lily answered.
“We were going to come wake you in a bit if you didn’t come out soon,” said Sophie, who was thumbing through a magazine from the coffee table.
“Why don’t you let me help you with that,” I offered, as Dad shook the pan back and forth.
He brushed me off. “I got it, I got it...I seen you do it plenty o’ times. It ain’t rocket science.” He carefully picked out a part of the eggshell that had fallen into the mix. I gulped.
“People don’t actually die from salmonella poisoning, do they?” I thought to Sophie and Lily, who both suppressed a laugh.
“Here ya go, eat up,” he said, as he slid the greasy mixture on to our plates. “Toast is over there.” He pointed to the blackened stack of bread next to the toaster.
“Thanks, Mr. McCoy. This looks great!” Sophie said enthusiastically. I briefly wondered if she’d gone blind.
“Don’t worry, Lily guided him through the whole thing. It may not taste the greatest, but it won’t make us sick,” Sophie thought as she retrieved her plate.
The three of us sat around the table with my dad, listening to his stories of the night before. He’d won almost two hundred dollars from Henri and the other men, and was boasting of his superior bluff-detecting skills. “Can’t no one put nothin’ past me, no sireee.”
We finished eating and went back to my room. Sophie’s and Lily’s parents weren’t coming until noon, so we decided to go down to the beach for a few hours.
“It’s so pretty down here,” Sophie s
aid as we reached the shore. “If I lived in your house I’d come walk on the sand every day.”
“I have been, mostly. At least in the afternoons for a while. I like to watch the sun set over the water. When I’m able to stop wearing these glasses, I’m gonna start taking early jogs before school.” I’d been toying with the idea for several days now, and each day the desire had grown stronger and stronger.
“Beautiful place to do it,” Lily said, but Sophie made a face.
“Ugh, I hate having to run. It’s bad enough when they make us do laps in PE; I’d never want to do it on purpose.”
“I’ve always enjoyed running,” I said. “It makes me relaxed; I feel freer, more at peace. I’ve had a lot of pent up energy lately, and sometimes I feel like I’m going to come undone if I don’t let it out somehow.”
“Yeah, that’s how I feel about dancing,” Sophie agreed. “I broke my ankle a few years ago and couldn’t dance for two months. I thought I was going to come out of my skin!” She did a little pirouette in the sand.
Lily laughed. “You big liar. You cheated the whole time, I know you did! I caught you, remember?”
Sophie blushed and playfully pushed her. “I didn’t cheat the whole time…just once or twice. It was just bad luck that you happened to see me.”
Before I had to ask what they were talking about, they both turned to me and started to explain at the same time. Finally, Lily let Sophie tell it because it was her story to tell.
“I did break my ankle in class a few years ago. If I’d been alone it wouldn’t have been any big deal, but I was with about twenty other people. My mom came and got me and said she was taking me to the hospital, but of course she didn’t. She’s a Healer. She can fix bones and injuries and such. So she fixed me right up good as new. Problem was everyone had seen me, and since bones don’t mend overnight, I was forced to hobble around in a cast for two months—crutches and everything.”
She rolled her eyes and did another little spin. “I begged her to do a memory spell on them so they’d forget they saw me fall. But you can’t do one of those without involving the Council, messing with free will and human destiny and all. So I was stuck playing a cripple. Just one time I thought I would go absolutely mad if I didn’t dance some, so I took off my cast and had a go at it for a while. And, of course, Lily had to barge in my room uninvited at that very moment and catch me.”
Lily was cracking up. “The best part is, when I opened the door she was floating in the air doing some spins. I startled her and broke her concentration. She fell and landed right on her butt.”
“It wasn’t funny,” Sophie retorted. “It really hurt.”
“Yes, it was funny,” Lily said, tears of laughter now streaming down her face. Sophie was trying hard to suppress a smile. After a few seconds Lily composed herself and added, “Better me than your father. Imagine what would have happened then.”
“I know, I know. Mom already read me the riot act. Did you guys know that her face can actually turn purple sometimes?” She spun ahead of us as we walked down the shoreline, showing off with perfect leaps and tight twirls.
“I think it’s cool that you like running,” Lily said to me as we followed behind the dancing Sophie. “Maybe you can try out for the track team in the spring. St. Morgan’s has one of the best programs in the state.”
“Oh, I don’t know if I’m good enough to make a team,” I scoffed. “I just need the exercise, and it’s a good way to clear my head.”
“Still, you should consider it. My parents have always stressed to me the importance of trying to lead as normal and balanced a life as possible. We need something other than just school, boys, and being witches.” She smiled. “Sometimes you need something that’s just yours…for you and you alone. Sophie has her dancing, I have my music…it would be good for you to find something that fulfills you, too.”
I thought about what she was saying, and it made pretty good sense. Maybe it would help if I had something I could focus on and be proud of. But I’d never tried out for anything before in my life, let alone actually competed.
“I think you’re right about having something for myself. But I don’t know if that includes competing on a track team – especially one that’s the best in the state. I don’t even know if I’m good. I just like running.”
“Well, think about it. No harm in trying is there? Besides, if you haven’t figured it out by now you will soon enough.” Lily peeked at me from the corner of her eye, and smoothed her long ebony hair from her face.
“What?”
“Well, you are a witch, there is no denying that. And that’s not something that can just be turned on or off like a light switch. If you do want to pursue running, or track, or anything…you will most likely be very good at it. As in, you need to be careful not to be too good.”
“Got it,” I said, remembering Sophie’s story about getting in trouble with the Council. “Let’s go fetch our little dancing ballerina before she spins off into the ocean, shall we?”
*****
That Monday at school, I anxiously counted down the minutes until my ‘appointment’ with the eye doctor. As of four o’clock this afternoon, I’d no longer be forced to wear my glasses for other people’s benefit. It was all I could do not to throw them in the trash can as I passed it.
As I headed down the hallway toward photography class, I heard, “Hey, Callie, wait up a sec.”
I turned to see Justin jogging a few steps to catch up with me. I smiled back at his easy grin.
“Hi, Justin.”
He flipped his hair out of his eyes and fell into step beside me. “Hey. How was your weekend? Do anything fun?”
I felt how happy he was to see me. He’d actually missed talking to me. I forced myself to stay focused on the crowded hallway and not on Justin’s intense pleasure at being by my side.
“Pretty mellow. Had a few friends spend the night on Friday. Hung out at the beach a bit. Caught up on my studying. How was yours?”
“Cool. Went surfing with my pops down in Malibu, and took some pictures with my new underwater camera. I’m hoping Mr. Walters will take a look at them and tell me what he thinks.”
“You’re really into photography, huh?” I asked as we reached the classroom. He opened the door for me.
“Yeah, besides surfing it’s probably my favorite hobby.” He took the seat next to mine, and we continued chatting until Mr. Walters started class.
It felt so nice sitting beside Justin. He had such a strong, pure energy about him. And I couldn’t help but be flattered by how happy he was to be around me, always...I’d never had that with someone before. Just having me near him for an hour was enough to make his whole world light up. The fact that I could bring so much joy to another person—just by sitting here, doing nothing special at all—made me feel really good. Powerful, almost. But at the same time, a small nagging sense of guilt kept creeping into the back of my mind.
I feared that Justin’s feelings for me would go unreciprocated, and that I would eventually hurt him, which was the absolute last thing I ever wanted to do. At the same time, I was a little disappointed in myself. Here was this amazing guy, who genuinely cared for me and who was actually here—a living, breathing, corporeal human I could touch and bring home to meet Dad and Ana. But my eyes and heart were not open to him. They were firmly in the possession of another who seemed to dwell only in the deepest corners of my dreams and fantasies.
When class was finally over, I hurried toward the front of the building to meet Henri. Justin walked alongside me until he reached his row of lockers. I started to say goodbye, but he pulled me back. “Hey, I wanna show you something real quick.”
Mia and Zoe stood by their lockers gawking at us. But I ignored them as Justin’s sudden nervousness made my stomach jump. He opened his locker and pulled out some pictures.
“Here, take a look, but don’t let anyone else see…I took these over the weekend down in Malibu. What do you think?”
&nbs
p; The photos were magnificent, and looked like they’d been taken by a professional. When I told him so, he blushed modestly and looked down. “Nah, not that good, but thanks. You’re the only one I’ve ever shown any of my stuff to, other than my parents and Mr. Walters. He keeps telling me to enter the photo contest the paper is sponsoring, but I’m not sure if they’re any good or not...”
“Definitely good. You should enter for sure.” I glanced around and saw Mia and Zoe still glowering at us. I was half tempted to throw my arms around Justin and kiss him, just to see what they would do. But Henri had just pulled up in the shiny town car.
“Sorry, Justin, I gotta run—my ride is here. See you tomorrow.”
“Later. Good luck at your appointment.” He flashed a quick smile.
Sophie and Lily stood by the car, waiting.
“Geez, could you guys be any more obvious?” Sophie teased.
I rolled my eyes. “What?! He was just showing me some pictures in his locker. Settle down.”
“Well, just so you know, Mia and Zoe were watching you guys, and I’m sure Savannah is getting an earful this very moment,” Lily said, glancing around.
I shrugged. “So?”
“You guys did look sort of intimate,” Sophie went on. “Like you were sharing some sort of secret…”
“Oh, please!” I exploded. “This is ridiculous! I can talk to whoever I want, whenever I want, and if someone has a problem with that, well, that’s her problem! I don’t care anymore!” Lily and Sophie stared at me, their eyes wide.
“I’m serious,” I continued, my hands in clenched balls on my hips. “Justin’s only my friend. A friend. And anyways, why should I care about what someone else thinks? Especially when he doesn’t even like her?!”
Sophie and Lily were still staring at me bug-eyed when I heard a voice behind me ask coolly, “Who doesn’t he like?”
I spun around and stared straight into the icy glare of Savannah Banyan.