“I...can’t.” I was terrified…afraid to find out what was waiting for me down there. Afraid that Nicholas wouldn’t be there when I reached the bottom of the hill. Afraid that he’d tell me Justin was dead, and that he was the one who’d killed him. Afraid that he’d look at me with those same cold and uncaring eyes that I had seen that morning at Ana’s right before he left…left and didn’t bother to come see me again.
Lily was incredulous. “You want to stay up here?”
I ignored her, and stood transfixed as Sophie landed on the shore next to Nicholas. They spoke briefly and hugged, then turned toward us.
“Why are you still standing there? Get down here!” Sophie thought to us.
“I think she needs a moment,” Lily thought back. Sophie turned and said something to Nicholas. He gave a slight, stiff nod, and she put her hand on his arm.
An instant later they were standing in front of us.
The impact of his presence took my breath away. Suddenly, all the anger and hurt I’d been suppressing for the past several weeks rushed to the surface and threatened to explode, fueled by a bitter, deep resentment. He had been gone for so long and had left me clueless, not knowing what was happening.
No. I wasn’t happy to see Nicholas. I was angry. Angry, because it would have been so easy for him to show up here, like he did right now, for even three seconds, just to let me know that they were both alive.
“Hello, Lily…Calista.” His voice was the same throaty velvet as before. But he sounded different now. Humbled. Exhausted.
I remained silent.
“Nicholas…” Lily gave me a sidelong glance before stepping forward to give him a hug. “It’s so good to see you! We’re so glad that you’re okay. You are okay, aren’t you?” She stepped back and scrutinized his face.
He gave her a weak smile before shifting his gaze to me. “Yes, I’ll be fine. Just a little tired.”
“Where’s Justin?” I snapped harshly. Lily and Sophie both turned to me, startled, but Nicholas remained impassive.
“He’s fine…as good as can be expected. He’s resting comfortably.” I could hear the strain in his voice.
My breath swooshed out of me and my legs felt suddenly weak.
He’s alive…they both are…
“Are you telling us it worked? You were able to cure Justin of the Hunter curse?” I whispered, unable to believe it.
He nodded. “It was touch and go there for a while, but we believe it was a success.”
I stared at his chiseled profile in the darkness. He seemed changed somehow. Something wasn’t right…
“Where is he?” Lily asked.
“He’s at the safe house…far from anyone. He has everything he requires for his recovery, but what he needs most right now is sleep. He’s been through a very rough ordeal. Frankly, I’m more than a little surprised he actually survived.”
“Why didn’t you bring him back with you?” My voice cut through the air like a knife.
Nicholas turned to me with the same intense look I’d pictured so often in my mind. The eyes I’d missed so desperately, and for so long. “He’s not ready to return yet. That’s one of the reasons I came back here. He’ll definitely need some memory modification, and unfortunately that’s not something I’m skilled at doing.”
He let out a deep sigh, and it was all I could do not to reach out to him. I was torn—half of me wanted to dive into his arms and hold him…kiss him…feel his hot breath on my neck. I wanted us to be the way we were that night in Druantia…that horrible, beautiful, fateful night. The other half of me wanted to pound on his chest and scream in his face for causing me so much agony for the past three weeks.
“Well, I’ll go see if Ana is free to help you. She’s probably still awake,” I replied evenly, and turned to walk away. But Nicholas reached out and took my arm.
“I said it’s one of the reasons I came here.”
Sophie and Lily exchanged glances. “Um, I think that’s our cue,” Sophie thought to me. As much as I wanted them here, I needed to be alone with Nicholas and have everything explained. Everything.
I nodded at her almost imperceptibly.
“Okay, so yeah, Lily and I need to go now…we need our New Year’s kisses and we’re already late. Nicholas, it’s great to have you back, and what you did for us was amazing. We are all eternally grateful to you—again.” She gave me a pointed look as she grasped onto Lily’s arm.
“Nicholas, thank you,” Lily echoed. “We really are happy to see you again. More than you know.” She gave me an encouraging smile as she and Sophie faded away into the night.
“Good luck!” was Sophie’s parting thought.
Nicholas and I stood there quietly in the chilly mist. How many times had I imagined our reunion, with me running into his arms, and him smiling down as he held me in his loving embrace? Our kiss would be so passionate it would put the greatest lovers in history to shame, and he would whisper all the things I yearned to hear.
This reunion was nothing like that.
The tension mounted as we stood and stared at each other in awkward silence. I tried to tell myself that this was the same boy from that amazing night—from my real-life fantasy. This was the person who was with me on the Isle…holding me…kissing me.
But the boy standing next to me no longer seemed like the boy from my dreams.
He felt like a stranger.
“Calista,” Nicholas finally whispered. “Can we go somewhere and talk?”
“Would you like to come inside?” I asked politely. He nodded, and we walked back to the cottage in silence.
I led the way to my bedroom, but when I turned to confront him, I recoiled in shock. Outside, under the cover of darkness, I hadn’t been able to see him clearly. But now I saw that his face—that once beautiful, vibrant, god-like face—was sunken and sallow. Black circles carved deep pockets under his bloodshot eyes, and there were distinct bruises on both of his cheeks. His lip had been split, and claw-like scratches wrapped around the front of his neck and up toward his ear.
“Oh my God, what happened?” I gasped, and automatically reached out to lightly caress his wounds. All my anger, all my resentment, suddenly washed away…replaced by a flood of guilt.
“It’s nothing…I’m fine. I’ll fix myself up tomorrow once I have some strength back,” he murmured. Without another word, he staggered over to my bed and collapsed onto it.
I stared at him, stunned.
Okay…I need a moment here. Nicholas is on my bed. Earlier today I was sure I’d never see him again. And now his head is resting on my favorite pillow. Am I dreaming?
I stood there, not sure what to do. Then, I made my way over to the other side of the bed and crawled in next to him.
“Were you in a fight?” I asked quietly.
He slowly opened one puffy eye. “You could say that.” Then he opened both eyes and stared directly at me. “Do I look disgusting to you now?” he asked with a tiny smile.
“No…don’t be silly. I’m just worried about you. You’re hurt.”
“I’m a lot better now.” The sexiness in his voice was unmistakable. Heat rushed to my cheeks, and I quickly glanced away.
“So, do you hate me?” he asked softly.
“What? No. Of course not. Why would you even ask that?”
“You don’t seem very happy to see me.” This time, there was a twinge of hurt in his voice. I scooted a little closer to him on the bed. Close enough so that he could reach out and touch me if he wanted to.
“I’m very happy to see you.”
“But?”
But…what was I supposed to say? He had returned to me like a wounded hero after a war, and I was irritated because he didn’t drop everything to pop in to say hi once in a while?
I shook my head. “I was just really worried…more than you probably know. All I could think about was you…and Justin…all the time. I was so worried, I felt sick…and so helpless. I couldn’t even think about anything else, n
o matter how hard I tried.” My eyes grew moist and I prayed I wouldn’t turn into a blubbering idiot.
“And you’re mad because I haven’t come to see you before tonight,” Nicholas added gently.
Why lie? He could read my heart and do all sorts of other magical tricks. He was probably reading my mind right now anyway.
“I was scared. Worried sick. Then sad…then mad.”
I heard the air rush out of him. He turned his battered face away from me and stared up at the ceiling. “Do you mind if I turn this off? The light is killing my eyes.”
“Go ahead.”
Nicholas barely lifted his fingers, and the room was pitched into darkness. An instant later, the three candles on my dresser ignited, casting an eerie glow and dancing shadows over the room.
“Much better,” he murmured. “Where were we? Oh yes. You were mad at me.”
I sighed and shifted closer to him. “Not mad. Worried, sad, and then just a little bit mad.” My voice had dropped to just above a whisper.
Nicholas moved his arm across the bed, reaching for me. His hand landed gently just above my knee, sending fiery tingles up through my leg and into my chest. “I’m so sorry you were worried,” he whispered, lightly caressing my thigh with his fingertips. “I’m sorry you were scared for even one second. And it breaks my heart to hear that you were sad. But if you’re mad at me…I don’t know if I can take it.”
My heart felt like it had dropped into my stomach. “I’m not mad…that was the wrong word. I take it back…it’s just…where were you?! Why didn’t you come back, if only for a few minutes? I looked for you every night and couldn’t—”
“I was afraid you’d think that.” His voice was heavy. “The truth is, I couldn’t. Where we were…where we had to go…there were constant threats everywhere. I could never let my guard down.”
“Not even to—”
“I’ll tell you the long version later. Right now all I can say is that Justin’s life was in imminent danger the entire time, and so was mine for bringing him there. I couldn’t take my eyes off him for even one second, let alone shimmer away somewhere….as much as I wanted to.” His fingers slowly traced small circles up and down my calf, and he locked his gaze on mine.
I shifted my body closer. “But what about when you slept?” I whispered. “Why couldn’t you find me then?”
He groaned softly, and with great effort pulled himself into a sitting position. Our faces were only inches apart. He moved his hand up past my knee and gently squeezed my thigh.
“Calista…I haven’t had a wink of sleep in twenty-one days.”
“What?” That was impossible! But I knew he was telling the truth. I felt it. But how could that be? A person would surely die, wouldn’t they? Nicholas did look like he’d been through hell. More than once. Even in the dimness of the candlelit room, I could clearly see the suffering on his face.
“You’ve been through so much,” I whispered, my eyes lowered. “And it was all my fault this happened. That you had to go—”
“No—” he interrupted forcefully. “None of this was your fault. None of this is anybody’s fault. No one we can blame, anyway. And don’t worry about me or what I went through. If it means keeping you safe, then it’s worth it.”
“You could’ve just killed Justin. Said he did it himself or that it was an accident. But you protected him. At great cost to yourself.”
Nicholas shrugged.
“Why?”
His eyes fixed on mine again, and I was swept away by their intensity. “I made it my mission to ensure his survival, because I had a feeling that if he died you’d be inconsolable. And you’d never stop blaming yourself. I don’t want you to be unhappy. Ever. And I sure as hell don’t want to be the guy responsible for causing you pain. That’s why.”
I gently brushed away the tuft of ebony hair that had fallen over his eyes, and traced his perfect features with my finger. This bruised and exhausted boy had never looked more beautiful to me.
“I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can get for you? Do for you? Anything you need?” I whispered.
His lips parted slightly, and I saw a glimmer in his eye. “Well, now that you mention it, yes, there is something I need.”
“What?” Can he feel the way he makes my heart pound?
“This,” he breathed. Resting one hand on my waist, he wrapped the other around the back of my neck, pulling me closer to him. His lips met mine with the sweet reunion of long-lost lovers. His mouth was warm and yielding, and danced lightly over mine with a sensuous desire. He moaned softly and pressed his body to mine. I pulled him even closer, holding him tight.
He kissed my mouth…my forehead… my neck… One hand softly caressed my thigh while the other burrowed deeply into my long hair…along the side of my head, touching my face. After several long and intense minutes he turned his head slightly and gave a low chuckle.
“What’s so funny?” I murmured as I nibbled on his ear.
“You are.” I felt his cheek smiling against mine.
“Oh yeah, why’s that?”
“I like your hat. Or is it a tiara? It’s very…festive.”
Oh my God—I had completely forgotten about the garish headdress Sophie had tacked on me earlier in the evening. How was it even still attached after Sophie took us on that crazy flight?
“Yeah, well…just getting in the spirit of things,” I mumbled, happy it was too dark for him to see the blush that was surely creeping up the side of my neck. I started to remove the tiara, but Nicholas put his hand on mine.
“No, leave it,” he said.
“It’s so stupid. I totally forgot it was even on.”
“Well, I think it’s perfect.” He wrapped both of his hands around mine and kissed me again.
Then, between tiny kisses on my neck, he whispered,
“Happy New Year, Calista.”
Chapter 7. Simple Joys
Perhaps it was because I lay awake in his arms for every second of the twelve hours that Nicholas slept that it seemed like such a long time. For him to sleep…not for me to lie there with him. That part I could do forever.
I wanted him to wake up. I wanted to look into his mossy green eyes again and hear the sexy richness of his voice as he said my name. But I knew that he desperately needed to sleep. So I contented myself with softly stroking his arms and back as I watched the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest.
Strange how I was not the least bit tired. Lying there, wrapped in Nicholas’s arms as he slept peacefully through the night—and now most of the day—I’d never felt more awake. I so enjoyed just looking at him…touching him…feeling his warm breath tickle my face. I didn’t want to waste even one precious second on stupid sleep.
But to be totally honest with myself, I had to admit I was afraid—afraid that if I did fall asleep, when I woke up he’d be gone. And this whole thing would be nothing but a beautiful dream. And a cruel nightmare.
I hadn’t moved since he fell asleep several hours ago, except to flick my hand to close the curtains, and then toward my bedroom door to snap the lock shut. It was the first time I’d ever locked it, but I thought it would be easier to try to explain why the door was locked than to risk my father innocently walking in and seeing us lying in bed together.
The mid-day sun filtered softly through the edges of the curtains, and I heard my father clanking around in the kitchen. Still Nicholas did not budge. It was almost two o’clock in the afternoon, and I knew that even if it was New Year’s Day, I was seriously pushing my luck if I stayed hidden away in my room much longer. Actually, I was surprised Dad hadn’t come knocking sooner.
With a sigh and a soft kiss on his lips, I carefully slid out from under Nicholas’s protective embrace, hoping not to waken him. He groaned softly and rolled over. I froze…but his breathing remained even and slow. I watched him a moment, then tucked a large down pillow between his open arms to replace my warm body.
I tip-toed over to the closet and changed out
of my clothes from the night before and into a pair of casual sweats. I splashed some cold water on my face, then twisted my hair into a quick bun. A few moments later I emerged from my bedroom to find my father staring into the refrigerator, looking confused. When he saw me, his eyes popped open dramatically, and he grinned.
“Holy smokes, it’s alive!” he teased. “Startin’ to think you done gone into a coma on me.”
I wandered over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Hi, Dad. Happy New Year.”
“You too, kiddo. You girls have fun last night?”
“Yeah, it was really nice. Probably my best New Year’s Eve ever. How about you?” I suddenly realized I hadn’t even heard him come in last night. My mind had obviously been elsewhere.
“Good music…good people. Good times all ‘round.”
“Are you making sandwiches?” I asked, eyeing the stacks of various meats and cheeses piled high between pieces of bread.
“Uh...yeah, well, I’m goin’ over to Ray’s to watch the game and didn’t wanna show up empty handed. Not polite.”
“Here, let me help.”
“Thanks.” He smiled, noticeably relieved. I had to give him credit for trying to make his own food, but some people were not meant to be anywhere near a kitchen, and my father was one of them.
I pulled out the lettuce, mayo, and mustard from the refrigerator and started to slice a tomato and onion. Dad sat on a stool at the countertop, eyeing me curiously.
“Ya know, with your hair like that you really resemble your ma. She had red hair too, ya know.” His mouth shaped into a small, crooked grin.
Careful not to cut my fingers off at his unexpected comment, I gave him a wobbly smile. “Really?” I asked, feigning ignorance. He didn’t know I’d seen the album with all her pictures. He didn’t know I knew anything at all about her.
Dad’s focus shifted the slightest bit, as if he was still looking at me, but no longer seeing me. His mind was somewhere else, lost in a memory. “Yeah…it was her pretty red hair that I noticed first about her. Like a cold winter’s night fire dancin’ in the air. Prettiest thing I ever seen in my whole life. Yours is a bit…brighter. But it suits ya, it really does.”