"Got it."
"Okay. Love you."
I repeated the phrase back to him, hung up, and considered my surroundings.
I could be lazy. I could read, watch a movie, go back to sleep. Or I could go to Jordan's, knowing the guys would be there. But I must've really embraced the responsible side of me, because I found myself heading back to my room. I showered, dressed in ripped jeans and a black tank top, and grabbed the keys to one of Channing's extra trucks. He had a few, but all of them were here. He must've taken a Harley to work today.
Before driving to Cross and Taz's house, I stopped at the gas station for coffee and a couple energy drinks. It wasn't long after the before I was pulling into their driveway.
Hearing laughter from the backyard, I walked in the front door without knocking. "Taz?"
It was cool inside. The patio doors were open and a breeze wafted in, mixing with the smell of tanning oil and chlorine from the pool. I heard a door slide open, then Taz called, "Yeah! I'll get rum."
The door shut again, and she grumbled, "You'd think the world was dying if they lost their buzz."
I started for the kitchen until I heard the door open behind her.
"That was a little louder than you might've meant," a male voice told her.
"What?" She sounded alarmed.
A low chuckle.
I recognized Race.
"I heard you," he said. "No one else."
Taz groaned. "Sunday would've chewed my head off." She laughed. "I must be more buzzed than I realized."
They couldn't see me, but I heard hands sliding on clothes, a soft sigh...aaaaannd they were making out. She moaned.
I shifted back on my heel. This was awkward.
To move and deal with this now? Or not move and still deal with this now? Okay. There was my answer. I was going to deal.
I coughed, my first signal to them.
Race heard. "What the--"
I walked around the last doorframe. "Hey there." I held up a hand and offered a stiff smile.
He seemed frozen, his hands on Taz's waist. His dark hair had grown a little. It was wet and sticking up. He wore red swimming trunks and nothing else. Taz had on a white wrap that was translucent enough for me to see her red bikini underneath. Her sunglasses were pushed up over her forehead, and her hair was pulled back into a French braid.
If I hadn't known them, I would've assumed they were a perfect couple like you see on Instagram. The matching bathing suits did the trick. Taz was always pretty, but her hair was longer now, or she had extensions in, and she seemed to have upped her sophistication level. She could compete against the likes of Sunday--or hell, even the bitches from Fallen Crest.
I stopped and took them in for a moment. "Wow, Taz. You look incredible." I meant what I said. Her makeup was on point. Her nails looked manicured, the red matching her bikini. I checked her feet. Pedicured. Same red color.
I'd never felt drab before--no, I wasn't going there. I still didn't, but I felt like maybe I should have. She was dressed to be taken seriously.
"Bren."
That's all she could say. Her hands fell slowly from Race's shoulders, but his remained cemented on her waist. He seemed more startled than she did.
I grinned at them, crossing to hoist myself up on the counter. "Close your mouth, Race."
His mouth clamped shut, but his eyes were still wide.
Taz's shoulders lifted as she drew in some air. She turned around and leaned against the kitchen counter, across from where I'd sat. She folded her arms over her chest, pulling her wrap closed with the motion.
"My brother told you about us?" she asked.
"Jordan. Cross didn't know either."
"That's right." Taz blinked a few times, like she was remembering something. "You guys were supposed to be gone all weekend, weren't you? Or coming back tonight?"
I shrugged. "We came back today." I nodded to them. "Congratulations are in order? I feel like you guys have joined Roussou's Hall of Fame for Coupledom." I glanced behind them to the pool, and it was what I had assumed. Sunday Barnes, Monica--all the popular Normals were out there.
"How's your cousin feel about all this?" I asked Race.
"His feelings don't factor into anything I do." Clearing his throat, he asked Taz, "Where's the alcohol? I'll take it out back if you two want to talk."
"Oh." Her frown only deepened, but she grabbed the rum and handed him a few extra wine coolers. "Someone will want these."
He gathered them to his chest, reaching for a few beers too. With a last nod to me, he went back outside, his eyes on Taz as he pulled the patio door closed behind him.
Once it was just the two of us, a whole different feeling settled between us.
It was awkward again, like things had been tipped off-balance.
"Listen, I--" She gestured toward the pool area.
I stopped her with a brisk shake of my head. "Race is a good guy. You're a good girl. You two are perfect for each other." I meant it. I let her hear how genuine I was, and I didn't look away.
She did, her head folding down. Her neck grew red. I heard a sniffle, then she reached up to wipe her eyes.
I hadn't expected that response.
Grasping the counter, I leaned forward. "Are you okay?"
She threw herself at me. Her head landed right in my boobs, and her arms wrapped tightly around me. Her voice came out muffled. "Thank you. I wanted to tell you about Race, but Sunday kept telling me he had a thing for you, and he told me that wasn't the case, but I didn't know and you were gone, but now you're back, and I'm totally rambling and I can't stop. I just can't stop"
"Stop." I put a hand on her forehead and pushed gently.
She leaned back, then laughed. "Thank you." Her arms were still around me, and she snuggled in, pressing her head back to my boobs.
Good thing I didn't have huge boobs, or this might've been more weird.
"I'm sorry for not being around."
I expected her to pull back.
She didn't. She tightened her hold, hugging me harder. "I'm just so glad you're okay." Deep breath. "Cross said you were, that you just needed time, but I didn't know, and you know my brother. He never tells me the real truth when it comes to you. I'm so glad, though. And oh my God, I like Race soo much. You have no idea. All the girls are jealous. If they can't get my brother, they want my boyfriend. I don't know how to handle it, and they're all out there, and I'm so glad you're back."
My hands went to her shoulders. I was ready to push her back so we could have a real conversation when she stepped away, wiping the tears from her face.
"The first semester kinda sucked because you weren't there. But it kinda didn't because there were no big crew brawls happening. Everyone was on good behavior, and then Race happened." A soft smile appeared on her face. She beamed. "Tabatha is so jealous."
"Tabatha?"
"Tabatha Sweets."
The name rolled off her tongue like she said it often. I was a bit impressed.
"You're really moving up in the Roussou world."
Her cheeks pinked, and she ducked her head in a slightly embarrassed way. Moving back to her counter, she secured her wrap, hugging herself.
"You weren't around, and Race wasn't hanging out with the guys. He wasn't hanging out with the Ryersons, so he got snatched up by her crowd." She waved to the pool. "They're all out there."
I nodded. It made sense, what happened in my absence. Taz was now friends--or frenemies--with Sunday Barnes and her group. She'd been alone too, in a way. She'd usually be with me, and often it had been the three of us--her, me, Cross.
Cross probably congregated with Jordan and Zellman last semester, leaving Taz by herself.
If Race got claimed by Tabatha's group, that meant... I cocked my head to the side.
"Race showed interest in you, didn't he?"
He'd been the one to bring her in, not Tabatha.
She looked down again, and her entire neck went beet red.
"I
was so nervous. Tabatha had been throwing herself at him." She ran her hands down the front of her legs. Even now, it made her sweat. She laughed nervously. "I thought she was going to filet me alive."
Normally she would've. "Tabatha was nice to you?"
"Yeah. She's been super nice, actually. Sunday and Monica were starting to be bitches to me, more than normal, and Tab was the one to stop them."
Tab. Not Tabatha.
Tabatha Sweets had been after Cross for years too. She was smart. Hearing how it had all played out with his sister, a part of me wondered if she was biding her time, if maybe she was okay with missing out on Race if Taz was brought into the fold. Did she think she'd have better access to Cross? On a more personal level?
"Does Tabatha hang out here often?"
What was more personal than his home?
Taz's mouth tightened, and she shrugged. "Sometimes."
She grabbed a glass and started to walk past me.
"Hold." I shot a leg out from the counter, blocking her. "How often?"
I watched as her fingers tightened their grip on the cup. "I don't know."
"Taz." A low warning.
Another jerking shrug motion. "Maybe once or...three times a week."
"Fuck," I murmured.
"What?" She looked up at me now, holding that glass like it was shield. "She's a friend, Bren."
"She's using you."
There was no heat in my words. I wasn't pushing her to believe me, but the way I said it broke her.
She looked down. "Don't do this."
"You know she's using you."
Her head snapped back up. "I was alone! Do you get that?! I'm always alone except when you're around, and that's only some of the time. You've been gone for months. I had no one."
I could've said, "You have your brother," but I knew she didn't. I could've said she had the cheerleading squad, but she didn't, even when she was on it. We were back to the conversation we'd had at the beginning of the year. The crew had taken her brother, and that was even more obvious when I was absent.
I felt bad. I did.
"You could've gone crew." I knew that was stupid, though. That wasn't Taz.
"Right." She barked out an incredulous laugh. "Are you kidding me? Because I'm the fighting type. Yeah, I'm the girl who reaches for a knife or wades into a fight when guys are swinging fists. Are you kidding me?" She glared. "I'm not tough like that. You're one of two girls in a crew. You know I wouldn't be able to hack it. Even if I tried, something would happen. I wouldn't be able to back someone up, and that would be bad." She quieted. I heard the pain there. "No, Bren. I can't hack it, and you know that."
"I think it's something you can aspire toward?" I was teasing her, and she knew it.
She laughed again, sounding much more relaxed this time. "God, I've missed you."
Whatever anxiety or irritation I'd had after hearing about Tabatha faded. Taz had me with those four words, and I slid off the counter, my arms out. She stepped into them, her arms coming around my back.
"It was so boring without you in school."
I laughed, still leaning against the counter. "Right. With the Roussou royalty circling you and Race Ryerson trying to date you, I'm sure it was super lame. So boring not having to worry about your friend fighting or stabbing principals."
"Well, you know what I mean. It was dull." She looked out to the pool again. "Somewhat." She turned back to me. "Crews are different. Crew life is...exciting, exhilarating, dangerous." She nodded toward her friends. "They're like that, but in a different way."
I pressed my lips together. My opinion of Normals--Taz and now Race being the exceptions--was a bit low. There was a lot of backstabbing and manipulation. We had politics, but we had loyalty in crews.
"Have fun with that," I told her.
"Bren..." She laughed and stepped to the side, hip-checking me. "Tabatha wants to hang out with you, but she's scared to death."
I smiled. "Really?"
"They're all terrified of the crews, but what'd she call you the other night?" She tapped her forehead. "Oh yeah. She said you were like a wolf. Your crew is aptly named. You're beautiful to look at, but lethal. She's right. It's a good metaphor for you."
I frowned. "Are you talking about me, or all crews?"
She thought about that. "You. Well, I mean, the conversation was about all crews, but she was really only talking about you."
And Cross.
"She's got a thing for your brother. You know that." I tried to gentle my tone, but it had to be addressed.
"Bren." She let out a soft puff of air. "You're judging."
I didn't care. People like Tabatha Sweets needed to be watched, your back never turned toward them.
But she wasn't going to hear me now. I could tell. I'd push it later.
I held my hands up. "Okay. Backing off, but if she hurts you, I'm going after her."
She hugged me again. "I'm glad you're back."
Another melting moment here. She might've not been Jordan or Zellman, but I'd back her like she was.
This girl was crew to me.
Taz pulled away a second later, frowning up at me. "Cross wouldn't tell me anything, but is everything sorted? I mean, with the stabbing..."
"Yeah, and that's why I'm here--" I caught the guarded flash in her eyes and amended. "It's one of the reasons I wanted to see you. I have to figure out my community service hours. Cross mentioned your charity thing might be approved."
Her eyes went wide, and a smile crept over her face. "Yes! Oh my gosh." She jumped back, clapping softly. "Yes, yes! I'd love that. I threw that out to Cross, but I didn't think he'd actually tell you, but yes. Ms. Bagirianni is the head of our committee. She'd be approved in a heartbeat by the judge. She's the one who mentioned it."
Shiiiiiit. I forgot about The Badger.
Despite all the cursing in my head, I knew I was stuck. They'd given me a list of places I could volunteer, but none held my interest. At least I'd be with Taz for this one, but The Badger?
Two guesses as to who'd end up being my counselor. A sinking feeling washed through me.
Taz was still talking, not knowing I'd slipped into the Fucks of all Fucks Fairyland. When I tuned back in, she was saying, "...call her, but I know it'll all work out. We have our first meeting Monday after school." She paused, an expectant look on her face. She had her phone out too. "Should I?"
"What?" I looked from her to the phone, and back again.
"Should I call her?"
"Why would you call her?" I was playing.
"Bren!"
"I'm kidding."
"Oh!" She laughed, then flicked her eyes upward. "But for real, do you want me to call her? I can do it now."
I wanted to say no, give myself more time to find another option, but I had to be realistic. I'd already wasted four months. I needed to get this done, and it'd take me a long time to fulfill the thousand hours, plus twenty counseling sessions.
My cheeks hurt because my smile was so forced. "Sure."
"Great! I'm on it. This will be so much fun."
I was going to regret this. I felt it in my bones. Way too much The Badger.
I nodded, my neck so damned stiff. "Yeah."
She picked up her glass again, gesturing outside with her phone. "I'm going to let Race know what I'm doing, and then I'll give her a call. Are you sticking--"
I gave her a pitying look.
She stopped herself. "No. Your crew isn't out there."
I stood up from the counter, nodding toward the front door. "I'm going to call the guy--"
"Bren Monroe!"
Tabatha Sweets had come inside.
Sunday and Monica were right behind her, both with differing expressions. Sunday's mouth hung open, but she recovered quickly, smoothing a hand down her hair. Monica looked less shocked and more snarly. She didn't hide her sneer.
I looked from them to Taz and asked, "You guys have a uniform protocol now?"
All wore the same sort of
wraps, but in different colors. Tabatha wore blue. Monica had red. Sunday had black, and all with bikinis underneath. The only one not wearing high heels was Taz, and they all had hair extensions with their hair down.
Not one person looked like they'd gone swimming.
Tabatha laughed. "We just spend a lot of time together." She came forward as Sunday and Monica hung back by the table. She came right into the kitchen, making Taz move to the side so she could open the fridge. Refilling her glass with juice, she leaned against the spot Taz had vacated. "How are you?"
I should've expected this. She was circling the wagons, bringing Taz in. She had her new backup. I glanced at Sunday. She'd tried approaching me in the fall. That hadn't gone well. But Tabatha was bigger and badder. I'm not talking physically. Power. I was usually lost in the crew world, but I knew enough to know that Tabatha Sweets was the top of the top, for the Normal world.
"You're friends with Taz now, I hear."
Her fake smile fell flat. "I am. I'm trying to be anyway."
I shook my head. I was going to call a spade a spade. "No, you're trying to get to Cross. You've been trying for years."
I waited for the denial.
She lifted a shoulder. "If I wanted to use Taz to get to her brother, I would've done it freshman year." She looked over to Taz. "I'll be honest. Race liked you. That's part of the reason I reached out, and yeah..." She glanced at me. "Some of it might've been about Cross. Can you blame me? Your brother is the best-looking guy in school," she told Taz. "But we're friends because I do like you."
"Are you serious?" Taz's lips opened in surprise. "You were using me?"
"I've been over here how many times now?"
She waited.
"Like thirty?" Taz said.
"And how many times has your brother been here, much less talked to me?"
Taz considered it. "Maybe once?"
"Once. One time. And that was just seeing him walk inside, talk to you, grab something from his room, and leave again. I never talked to him. I didn't even try, right?"
"Right."
Taz was buying it. She was licking it up like cream left for a cat. She wanted to believe it, and wariness heightened my dislike for this girl. She was good, damned good.
She was going to be a problem.
Cockiness flared in Tabatha's eyes as she swung her gaze my way.
I stepped up to her, keeping my voice low, because she wasn't worth the extra energy. "You're going to want to hope Race doesn't leave."
Now her lips parted. Confusion pulled her eyebrows together.
"Because if he leaves, there goes Taz's anchor in your group. We'll find out then if you become that anchor instead."