It was growing light, and she had just closed her eyes against her fatigue and depression when the big man surprised her by touching her gently on the arm. When she lifted her head to look at him, he began to sign.
I want you to do something for me.
She nodded, and her fingers repeated her words. “What?”
It will be difficult for you, but it is necessary.
She tried to see his eyes and couldn’t. He was turned too far into the shadows.
I want you to forgive me.
“Forgive you for what?”
I have lied to you about something. I have lied repeatedly. Ever since I have known you.
She shook her head, confused, anxious, weary to the bone. “Lied about what?”
His gaze never faltered. About your parents. About your mother and father. I knew them. I knew who they were and where they came from. I knew everything.
She stared, not quite ready to believe what she was hearing.
Listen to me, Wren. Your mother understood the impact of Eowen’s prophecy far better than the queen. The prophecy said that you must be taken from Morrowindl if you were to live, but it also said that you would one day return to save the Elves. Your mother correctly judged that whatever salvation you could provide your people would be tied in some way to a confrontation with the evil they had created. I did not know this at the time; I have surmised it since. What I did know was that your mother was determined that you be raised to be strong enough to withstand any danger, any foe, any trial that was required of you. That was why she gave you to me.
Wren was stunned. “To you? Directly to you?”
Garth shifted, pushing himself into a sitting position, giving his hands more freedom. He grunted with the effort. Wren could see blood soaking through the bandages of his wounds.
She came with her husband to the Rovers, sent by the Wing Riders. She came to us because she was told that we were the strongest of the free peoples, that we trained our children from birth to survive because survival is the hardest part of every Rover’s life. We have always been an outcast people and as such have found it necessary to be stronger than any other. So your mother and your father came to us, to my family, a tribe of several hundred living on the plains below the Myrian, and asked if there were someone among us who could be trusted in the schooling of their daughter. They wished her to be trained in the Rover way, to begin learning as soon as she was old enough how to survive in a world where everyone and everything was a potential enemy. I was recommended. We talked, your parents and I, and I agreed to be your teacher.
He coughed, a deep, racking sound that tore from the depths of his chest. His head lowered momentarily as he gasped for breath.
“Garth,” she whispered, frightened now. “Tell me about this later, after you have rested.”
He shook his head. No. I want this finished. I have carried it with me for too long.
“But you can hardly breathe, you can barely . . .”
I am stronger than you think. His hand closed over her own momentarily and released. Are you afraid I might be dying?
She swallowed against her tears. “Yes.”
Does that frighten you so? After all I have taught you?
“Yes.’’
The dark eyes blinked, and he gave her a strange look. Then I will not die until you are ready for me to do so.
She nodded wordlessly, not understanding what he meant, wary of the look, anxious only that he live, whatever bargain it required.
His breath exhaled in a thick rattle. Good. Your mother, then. She was everything you have been told—strong, kind, determined, devoted to you. But she had decided that she must return to her people. She had made up her mind before she left Morrowindl, I think. Your father acquiesced. I don’t know the reason for their decision; I only know that your mother was bound in countless ways to her own mother and to her people, and your father was desperately in love with her. In any case, it was agreed that you should be sent to live with the Ohmsfords in Shady Vale until you were five—the beginning age for training a Rover child—and then given back to me. You were to be told that your mother was a Rover and your father an Ohmsford and. that your ancestors were Elves. You were to be told nothing else.
Wren shook her head in disbelief. “Why, Garth? Why keep it all a secret from me?”
Because your mother understood how dangerous it was to try to influence the workings of a prophecy. She could have tried to keep you safe, to prevent you from returning to Morrowindl. She could have stayed with you and told you what was foreordained. But what harm might she have caused by interfering so? She knew enough of prophecies to recognize the threat. It was better, she believed, that you grow to womanhood without knowing the specifics of what Eowen had foretold, that you find your destiny on your own, however it was meant to be. It was given to me to prepare you.
“So you knew everything? All of it? You knew about the Elfstones?”
No. Not about the Elfstones. Like you, I thought them painted rocks. I was told to make certain that you knew where they came from, that they were your heritage from your parents. I was to see to it that you never lost them. Your mother was convinced, I suppose, that like your destiny, the power of the Elfstones would reveal itself when it was time.
“But you knew the rest, all the time I was growing up? And after, when I went to the Hadeshorn, when I was sent in search of the Elves?”
I knew.
“And didn’t tell me?” There was a hint of anger in her voice now, the first. The impact of what he was telling her was beginning to set in. “Never a word, even when I asked?”
I could not.
“What do you mean, you could not?” She was incensed. “Why?”
Because I promised your mother. She swore me to secrecy. You were to know nothing of your true heritage, nothing of the Elessedils, Arborlon, or Morrowindl, nothing of the prophecy. You were to discover it on your own or not, as fate decreed. I was not to aid you in any way. I was to go with you when it came time if I chose. I was to protect you as best I could. But I was to tell you nothing.
“Ever?”
The big man’s breath rattled in his chest, and his fingers hesitated. I swore an oath. I swore that I would tell you nothing until the prophecy came to pass, if it ever did—nothing until you had come back into Arborlon, until you had discovered the truth for yourself, until you had done whatever it was you were fated to do to help your people. I promised.
She sank back on her heels, despair washing through her. Trust no one, the Addershag had warned. No one. She had believed she realized the impact of those words. She had thought she understood.
But this . . .
“Oh, Garth,” she whispered in dismay. “I trusted you!”
You lost nothing by doing so, Wren.
“Didn’t I?”
They faced each other, silent, motionless. Everything that had happened to Wren since Cogline had first come to her those many weeks past seemed to gather and settle on her shoulders like an enormous weight. So many harrowing escapes, so many deaths, so much lost—she felt it all, the whole of it, come together in a single moment, in this truth terrible and unexpected.
Had you known before coming, it might have changed everything. Your mother understood that. Your father as well. Perhaps I would have told you if I could, but my promise bound me. The big frame shifted, and the sharply etched bones of the other’s face lifted into the light. Tell me, if you can, that I should have done otherwise. Tell me, Wren, that I should have broken my promise.
Her mouth was a tight, bitter line. “You should have.”
He held her gaze, dark eyes flat and expressionless.
“No,” she admitted finally, tears in her eyes. “You shouldn’t have.” She looked away, empty and lost. “But that doesn’t help. Everyone has lied to me. Everyone. Even you. The Addershag was right, Garth, and that’s what hurts. There were too many lies, too many secrets, and I wasn’t part of any of them.”
S
he cried silently, head lowered. “Someone should have trusted me. My whole life has been changed, and I have had nothing to say about it. Look what’s been done!”
One big hand brushed her own. Think, Wren. The choices have all been yours. No one has made them for you; no one has shown you the way. Had you known the truth of things, had you understood the expectations held for you, would it have been the same? Could you say the choices were yours in that case?
She looked back, hesitant.
Would it have been better to know you were Ellenroh Elessedil’s granddaughter, that the Elfstones you thought painted rocks were real, that when you grew to womanhood you would one day be expected to travel to Morrowindl and, because of a prophecy given before you were born, save the Elves? How free would you have been to act then? How much would you have grown? What would you have become?
She took a deep breath. “I don’t know. But perhaps I should have been given the chance to find out.”
The light was stronger now as dawn broke somewhere beyond the pall of the mist and trees. Faun lifted her head from out of Wren’s lap where she had lain motionless. Triss had come back from the edge of the dark; he stood watching them in silence. The night sounds had died away, and the frantic movement had ceased. In the distance, the sounds of Killeshan’s eruption continued unabated, steady and ominous. The earth shook faintly, and the fire of the lava rose skyward into gray smoke and ash.
Garth stirred, his hands moving. Wren, he signed. I did what I was asked, what I promised. I did the best I could. I wish it had not been necessary to deceive you. I wish I had been able to give you the chance you ask for.
She looked at him for a long time, and finally nodded. “I know.”
The strong, dark face was rigid with concentration. Don’t be angry with your mother and father. They did what they thought they had to do, what they believed was right.
She nodded again. She did not trust herself to speak.
You must find a way to forgive us all.
She swallowed hard. “I wish . . . I wish I didn’t hurt so much.”
Wren, look at me.
She did so, reluctantly, warily.
We are not finished yet. There is one thing more.
She felt a chill settle in the pit of her stomach, an ache of something sensed but not yet fully realized. She saw Stresa appear out of the trees to one side, lumbering heavily, winded and damp. He slowed as he approached them, aware that something was happening, a confrontation perhaps, a revelation, a thing inviolate.
“Stresa,” Wren greeted quickly, anxious to avoid hearing any more from Garth.
The Splinterscat swung his blunt cat face from one human to the other. “We can go now,” he said. “In fact, we should. The mountain is coming down. Sooner or later it will reach here.”
“We must hurry,” she agreed, rising. She snatched up the Ruhk Staff, then looked down anxiously at her injured friend. “Garth?”
We need to speak alone first.
Her throat tightened anew. “Why?”
Ask the others to go ahead a short distance and wait for us. Tell them we won’t be long.
She hesitated, then looked at Stresa and Triss. “I need a moment with Garth. Wait for us up ahead. Please.”
They stared back at her without speaking, then nodded reluctantly, Triss first, lean face expressionless, and Stresa with sharp-eyed suspicion.
“Take Faun,” she asked as an afterthought, disengaging the Tree Squeak from its perch on her shoulder and setting it gently on the ground.
Stresa hissed at the little creature and sent it racing off into the trees. He looked back at her with sad, knowing eyes. “Call, rwwwlll Wren of the Elves, if you need us.”
When they had gone, the sound of their footsteps fading, she faced Garth once more, the Staff gripped tightly in both hands.
“What is it?”
The big man beckoned. Don’t be frightened. Here. Sit next to me. Listen a moment and don’t interrupt.
She did as he asked, kneeling close enough that her leg was pressed up against his body. She could feel the heat of his fever. Mist and pale light obscured him in a shading of gray, and the world about was fuzzy and thick with heat.
She lay the Ruhk Staff down beside her, and Garth’s big hands began to sign.
Something is happening to me. Inside. The Wisteron’s poison, I think. It creeps through me like a living thing, fire that sears and deadens. I can feel it working about, changing me. It is a bad feeling.
“I’ll wash the wounds again, rebind them.”
No, Wren. What is happening now is beyond that, beyond anything you can do. The poison is in my system, all through me.
Her breath was hurried, angry. “If you are too weak, we will carry you.”
I was weak at first, but the weakness is passing now. I am growing stronger again. But the strength is not my own.
She stared at him, not really understanding, but frightened all the same. She shook her head. “What are you saying?”
He looked at her with fierce determination, his dark eyes hard, his face all angles and planes, chiseled in stone. The Wisteron was a Shadowen. Like the Drakuls. Remember Eowen?
She shuddered, jerked back and tried to rise. He grabbed her and held her in place, keeping their eyes locked. Look at me.
She tried and couldn’t. She saw him and at the same time didn’t, aware of the lines that framed him but unable to see the colors and shadings between, as if doing so would reveal the truth she feared. “Let me go!”
Then everything broke within her, and she began to cry. She did so soundlessly, and only the heaving of her shoulders gave her away. She closed her eyes against the rage of feelings within, the horror of the world about her, the terrible price it seemed to require over and over again. She saw Garth even there, etched within her mind—the dark confidence and strength radiating from his face, the smile he reserved exclusively for her, the wisdom, the friendship, and the love.
“I can’t lose you,” she whispered, no longer bothering to sign, the words a murmur. “I can’t!”
His hands released her, and her eyes opened. Look at me.
She took a deep breath and did so.
Look into my eyes.
She did. She looked down into the soul of her oldest and most trusted friend. A wicked red glimmer looked back.
It already begins, he signed.
She shook her head in furious denial.
I can’t let it happen, Wren. But I can’t do it alone. Not and be sure. You have to help me let go.
“No.”
One hand slipped down to his belt and pulled free the long knife, its razor-sharp blade glinting in the half-light. She shuddered and drew back, but he grabbed her wrist and forced the handle of the knife into her palm.
His hands signed, quick, steady. There is no more time left to us. What we’ve had has been good. I do not regret a moment, of it. I am proud of you, Wren. You are my strength, my wisdom, my skill, my experience, my life, everything I am, the best of me. And still your own person, distinct in every way. You are what you were meant to be—a Rover girl become Queen of the Elves. I can’t give you anything more. It is a good time to say good-bye.
Wren couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t see clearly. “You can’t ask this of me! You can’t!”
I have to. There is no one else. No one I could depend upon to do it right.
“No!” She dropped the knife as if it had burned her skin. “I would rather,” she choked, crying, “be dead myself!”
He reached down for the knife and carefully placed it back in her hand. She shook her head over and over, saying no, no. He touched her, drawing her eyes once more to his own. He was shivering now, just cold perhaps, but maybe something more. The red glow was more pronounced, stronger.
I am slipping away, Wren. I am being stolen from myself. You have to hurry. Do it quickly. Don’t let me become...He couldn’t finish, his great, strong hands shaking now as well. You can do it. We have practiced often
enough. I can’t trust myself I might...
Wren’s muscles were so tight she could barely move. She glanced over her shoulder, thinking to call Stresa back, or Triss, desperate for anyone. But there was no one who could help her, she knew. There was nothing anyone could do.
She turned quickly back. “There must be an antidote that will counteract the poison, mustn’t there?” Her words were frantic. “I’ll ask Stresa! He’ll know! I’ll get him back!”
The big hands cut her short. Stresa already knows the truth. You saw it in his eyes. There isn’t anything he can do. There never was. Let it go. Help me. Take the knife and use it.
No!
You have to.
No!
One hand swept up suddenly as if to strike her, and instinctively she reacted with a block to counter, the hand with the knife lifting, freezing, inches above his chest. Their eyes locked. For an instant, everything washed away within Wren but the terrible recognition of what was needed. Tile truth stunned tier. She caught her breath and held it.
Quick, Wren . . . She did not move. He took her hand and gently lowered it until the knife blade was resting against his tunic, against his chest. Do it.
Her head shook slowly, steadily from side to side, a barely perceptible movement.
Wren. Help me.
She looked down at him, deep into his eyes, and into the red glare that was consuming him, that rose out of the horror growing within. She remembered standing next to him as a child when she had first come to live with the Rovers, barely as tall as his knee. She remembered herself at ten, whip-thin, leather tough, racing to catch him in the forest. She remembered their games, constant, unending, all directed toward her training.