“But you need to listen to me; it is important. I know something.”
“Not now, okay?”
He started walking as if he wanted to walk right through me, which he could easily do. He knew that. I tried to stop him.
“I know you want to protect your mother, but I also know that something bad is going happen to you if you fight your step-dad,” I held my hand out in front of me. “Something really bad.”
He stopped and looked at me. Then he shook his head.
“Nothing bad could ever happen to me,” he said. “While you have been gone I bought a gun. It’s in the top drawer of my nightstand. So if he tries anything, I will just kill him.”
I sighed deeply. There had been no gun in the picture in the book.
“That might be, but you … I know for a fact that he will kill you.” There it was. I just blurted it out.
Jason stared at me with great disbelief. Then he shook his head again.
“I don’t mind dying, as long as I can protect my mother,” he said. “Then I can go and be with you. He will go to jail for killing me. I am not afraid of dying anymore. Not since I met you.”
I had really screwed things up. Now I knew why students weren’t supposed to leave the school area.
“But you don’t understand. You are way too young to die. You have your whole life ahead of you. Think of all the fun stuff you will miss out on.”
He lifted his shoulders.
“I don’t care. If my time is up, it’s up. I have to go.”
I was confused. I thought I was helping him by telling him, but it was as if he didn’t care!
“But …”
He stopped listening and went straight through my body like he would walk through a wave in the ocean.
I fell to the floor, trying to catch my breath. Meanwhile Jason continued toward the door. I heard him knock on it. I made myself invisible.
“Mom. It’s me, Jason. Open the door. Are you all right?”
The key turned and the door slowly opened. The woman’s small face appeared.
“Who were you talking too?” she asked with a trembling voice.
I didn’t hear him answer, but I felt the rage growing in him again. I went and stood next to him. Then I looked at his face. He was staring at his mother. Her eye was swollen and she had bruises all over her face. Blood was still running slowly out of her nose, and she wiped it off.
Jason stood motionless for a long time, like he was paralyzed. His hands shook and his body quivered. I saw a tear roll from his eye. He didn’t wipe it away as it rolled down his cheek and ended on his chin.
I tried to grab his hand, but I couldn’t. The shield burned my hand. His anger made him unreachable to me.
“Jason, just calm down. It’s going to be just fine. I’m okay. This just looks worse than it really is.” She attempted to smile but winced in pain.
“I am going to kill him,” Jason said with a shaky yet determined voice.
Everything inside of him seemed about to erupt—every little frustration buried but not forgotten, every stroke from his step-dad’s fists that he never returned, every humiliating situation never avenged.
“Please don’t, Jason,” his mother pleaded. “He will be good again once he sleeps this one off. You know that. He’s a great guy on the good days.”
“That’s not enough.” Jason pushed his way past the mother.
I was sure he would go for the gun, but instead he grabbed his baseball bat.
My heart stopped beating and I froze. I recognized the bat from the book. It was that same blue bat I knew his step-dad would beat him to death with.
“Don’t, Jason,” his mother continued.
But he didn’t listen. He had made his mind and heart up. He walked toward the stairs. As he walked through the living room I tried to talk to him. I felt tears in my eyes. I had no idea how to stop him.
“Please don’t do this, Jason,” I said with a soft voice. “Please. That bat is the one your step-dad will use to kill you. I have seen it. There was this book …”
But it was as though he couldn’t hear me any longer, like my voice wasn’t strong enough to go through that shield of anger. I saw it now like an orange fire surrounding his entire body as though he was glowing.
I felt my heart skip a beat. I knew where I had seen that kind of fire before. In Portia’s eyes. She had worn the same kind of anger inside.
Jason’s step-dad had aroused and was sitting at the kitchen table with his head bowed when Jason walked in, holding the bat in front of his body.
His step-dad lifted his head and looked at him. Then he burst into loud laughter. “Who the hell do you think you are?” He said.
Jason’s entire body trembled. “I’m here to kill you for what you did to my mother,” he said with a voice that was no longer shaky, but sharp and determined.
“You little rat.” His step-dad got up from his chair. “You think you can come here and threaten me?”
He took a couple of slow steps toward Jason with a sneer and eyes that looked like he would snap at any moment.
That was when I saw them: the small shadows on the wall again. Just like the ones I had seen in the operating room at the hospital. They crept along the walls, with a moaning and growling sound. I realized they were helping the step-dad, cheering him on. I thought about how they had gone into my head and told me all those lies They were probably doing the same for Jason’s step-dad right now. And he was listening to them.
He hit his fist on the table. “I am FED up with all your crap. You live here for free. You want me to support you while you do nothing around here. NOTHING! I have to work every freaking day to keep food on your table. To keep you alive. You can’t kill me. You know why? Because without me, you and that no-good mother of yours would starve to death.”
“We would figure it out. I could get a job,” Jason said.
I noticed the trembling in his voice was back. As his step-dad came closer, it got worse and Jason backed up. His eyes were filled with fear. Then he found his courage again and lifted the bat higher in the air.
“Come any closer and I will hit you with this,” Jason said. “I will kill you. But I will not make it a merciful death. I want you to suffer!”
That’s why he didn’t bring the gun instead, I thought. He didn’t want his step-dad to have an easy death. But the baseball bat didn’t seem to frighten him one bit.
Jason’s step-dad burst into loud laughter again. I could tell it scared Jason that his step-dad wasn’t afraid of him.
“You? You are nothing but a scared little kid” He took another step closer to Jason. “A little mamma’s boy, aren’t you?”
“I will hit you with this,” Jason stuttered.
I felt my heart break into pieces. There was no way Jason could win this fight. It would all happen as shown in the book. I couldn’t bear it. Had I come in vain?
The step-dad smirked and took another step toward Jason. Jason didn’t hesitate one second. He swung the bat. But as it came close to his face, the step-dad lifted his hand and grabbed the other end of the bat. Just one second later, it would have hit his face.
Jason froze and so did I.
The step-dad held on to the bat and Jason couldn’t wrest it out of his hand. When the step-dad started turning it, I could see it was hurting Jason’s arm and he had to let go of it.
My heart raced. I felt so chilled inside, like ice-cold water was running in my body causing me to freeze.
I had to do something. If I didn’t, it would go exactly as predicted in the book. I couldn’t let that happen. I just couldn’t. I had to give it a try.
In that second the step-dad turned the bat, lifted it, and took a swing at Jason, who ducked and avoided the first blow. But the second blow hit him straight in the stomach and he bent over in pain.
I didn’t know what to do. I felt horrified. Jason was in pain and his step-dad lifted the bat to take another swing at him. He hit him in the back and Jason fell flat
on the ground. I started crying and then I thought of something. A chair in the back wouldn’t be enough this time. He would just come after Jason at another time.
I hurried upstairs and took in a deep breath. For the first time, I managed to go through a massive wood door. I went into Jason’s room and placed myself close to his mother. She was sitting on the bed, crying and holding her hands to her head, blocking her eyes from the reality going on downstairs. I heard Jason scream once more and felt more tears in my eyes.
Now where had he told me the gun was? In the top drawer of the nightstand! I turned and found the nightstand with a little blue lamp on it.
I tried to pull the drawer open but my hand kept slipping through. I took in a couple of deep breaths to calm down. I tried to remember what Mrs. Ohayashi had taught us in the Art of Transition class. It was all in my head. She had taken us to a pond outside and made us look into the water.
“See,” she said. “Now it is nice and still. Your minds are like that water,” she said and threw a rock in it. “When it gets agitated you can’t see. Everything is blurry and unclear to you. You need to be like the calm water.”
If I am too agitated I can’t hold on to anything. I need to keep calm, I said to myself while trying to breathe deeply. Another scream came from Jason downstairs. I tried to block it out. I couldn’t let it disturb my focus.
I reached out one more time. This time I managed to grab the handle and hold it between my fingers. Then carefully I pulled with all my strength.
The drawer came open and the gun appeared. As it did, Jason’s mother heard the sound and turned around. She looked around and then she saw the gun. She stared at it for a few seconds before she took it up. She turned it a couple of times in her hand like she wanted to feel it, feel its power, and then she seemed to make a decision.
As another scream came from downstairs Jason’s mother pulled the door open to his room and walked out with the gun in her hand.
Chapter 21
I was scared as I followed Jason’s mother down the stairs. Scared of what was going to happen. Was I about to change Jason’s destiny? Had I already done it by opening the drawer? Was that even possible? Could I change someone’s course of life? Even if it was written in the book of “meant-to-be”?
Jason’s mom walked slowly and carefully. Every time she heard Jason scream she stopped, like she needed to find the courage to go on. She was holding the gun between her hands and I noticed she had a hard time holding it still.
That was when I remembered what Mick had done at the hospital. I started whispering encouraging words to her, giving her the strength to go on, to help Jason. I don’t know if I got through to her, I don’t know if she heard me, but as she kept on walking across the living room, it seemed like she was getting more and more strength and power in her steps. The sound of the baseball bat hitting Jason one more time filled the air, but this time there was no scream. As we entered the kitchen we both saw why. He was lying completely still on the tiles—motionless, lifeless. My heart stopped beating.
Had we come too late?
It all looked exactly as it did in the book. This was the picture, except for one thing. The mother hadn’t been in it.
When I realized that, I turned to look at her and saw her lift the gun and point it at her husband. He was still bent over Jason’s lifeless body and now he was raising the bat to give him that final stroke I remembered from the book. The one that would kill Jason.
First I looked at Jason and all the blood on the floor, next at the mother. In the second between lifting and swinging the bat the man looked up and his eyes caught those of the mother. He froze for one fatal second.
Then she pulled the trigger.
The bullet hissed through the air and hit the man right in the heart. It was as if time stood still and nothing moved in the room. Time and even the air were frozen. All I heard was the bullet hitting the flesh and going straight through his body. I’m certain I even heard his heartbeat stop.
Then he fell to the floor. The bat clattered on the tiles. It bounced a couple of times making the loudest noise I have ever heard. It was like it wouldn’t stop. All I heard in my head was that sound.
Then I sensed someone else was in the room. I turned and saw Rahmiel. She put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it. I hadn’t realized I had started crying. Her touch made me feel warm and loved like never before.
What I didn’t know was that I needed her protection for the next thing that was about to happen. Suddenly it was like there was a fire in the room. It became burning hot. The shadows on the wall became bigger and their groaning louder. The man’s spirit rose slowly from his body and as it did, the floor opened up underneath him. A horrific screaming came into the room and filled me with nothing but sorrow and pain. It was as if all life and hope was sucked out of me. Rahmiel saw it and held me tight. I heard her voice inside of my head, whispering comforting words, telling me I was loved.
Then the opening in the floor turned into what looked like an open mouth. Like a burning crater, like a giant volcano with nothing but death and despair in it. I now realized the screaming came from that burning crater. It was an endless crying and screaming that burned its way into my heart and made me feel empty and hopeless. I fell to my knees. Rahmiel knelt next to me. With her mighty body she picked me up and held me in her arms. Meanwhile the spirit of the step-dad started falling into the burning crater. His face twisted in pain as he himself started screaming.
Then the floor closed and he was gone. The burning and the screaming stopped. Even the shadows had gone as well.
Jason’s mother hadn’t moved, but now she dropped the gun and ran toward Jason. She turned him around and wiped blood off his face. She wailed and it made my stomach turn. I loved him so much and I only wanted to help him. I wanted him not to get beaten. But it had happened anyway.
I got back on my feet and flew closer. As I did I heard a moan. It came from Jason. He was still alive!
Filled with such amazing joy inside, I turned to look at Rahmiel. She smiled her comforting smile. I felt like everything was going to be all right after all.
While his mother turned her back at us and started calling for an ambulance Jason even opened his eyes and looked at me. I was sure that I saw him smile behind that beaten-up face when I made myself visible for a second. I smiled at him and touched him gently.
“You will be all right now,” I whispered before I made myself invisible again.
Then I heard the mother call the police.
“I shot my husband,” she said.
I held Jason’s hand and sat next to him. The police were first on the scene; the paramedics followed quickly after. A paramedic declared the step-dad dead and the police started interrogating the mother about what had happened.
The paramedics examined Jason and his wounds before they put him on a stretcher. But Jason wouldn’t lie still. He kept looking at his mother while she was talking to the police and crying. That was when I realized why he was so worried. A second later she was put in handcuffs and two officers were escorting her out of the house.
Another officer approached Jason.
“I am sorry, son, but we have to take your mother in.”
Jason’s eyes became wide and filled with anxiety.
“But why? She saved my life!” he yelled.
“She has killed a man. She killed your stepfather and that needs to be investigated.”
“He was beating me … and her!”
“We still need to investigate if a crime has been committed. As I said, I am sorry, but that’s the way it is.”
Jason was now furious and tossing himself around on the stretcher.
“You can’t touch her! She was defending me!” he yelled with all of his strength. I tried to approach him, but his anger made it impossible.
Jason was carried out of the house on the stretcher while he was screaming at the police. I felt Rahmiel’s hand on my shoulder once again and I looked up. “It is tim
e to go,” she said.
I nodded and followed her back to the bathroom where we went through the mirror. Rahmiel didn’t say a word to me all the way back, not until I was in my bed again. Then she looked me deep in the eyes.
“You did something extremely brave but also very foolish today,” she said. “We will talk about it later. Now get some sleep.”
Then she kissed me on the forehead and as she left the room with her glowing body all the light in the room disappeared.
Chapter 22
A month went by with exams and, to my own surprise, I was happy to learn that I passed with good marks. Even The Art of Transition went pretty well, not something Mrs. Ohayashi had expected either. After the exam she came out of the classroom into the hall where I was waiting to hear if I had passed or not. She looked at me with her narrow black eyes and said:
“Well, it seems as though we will be getting on each other’s nerves in Advanced Art of Transition next year as well.” And then she went back into the classroom and closed the door.
“I guess so,” I mumbled happily while I went to see Mick in the kitchen.
“I passed all of my exams,” I said and hugged him.
“Now that is something to celebrate,” he said with a great smile.
He concentrated for a second while staring into my eyes and then he smiled again.
“You want strawberries dipped in chocolate, huh?”
I smiled again. “Those are my favorite.”
“Well, your wish is my command, my lady,” he said and bowed in front of me. Then he took a plate in his hand and looked at it intensely until the strawberries appeared a second later.
“So how have you been?” he asked while we ate.
“Up and down. Mostly concentrating on my exams.”
“What about the whole Jason story?”
I sighed. “I don’t know. I haven’t visited him since, so I have no idea how he is doing.”
“Why is that?”
“I feel like I’ve messed everything up. I mean I am happy that I saved his life, but … I don’t know.”