“I want to try. The music is mine, you know? That’s the one thing that is the same before and after the blindness.”
“I started to get that feeling as I listened to tape number six and realized you’d made it at about three in the morning. Those drumsticks you were tapping on the desk jarred the turntable, making the needle occasionally skip.”
“JoAnne and I were crashed at her place going through a stack of old LPs she found. I liked making those tapes. That gift was something I didn’t have to adapt because of my blindness.”
“That’s twice in the space of a few minutes you’ve drawn the line of before and after the accident. You’re not compromising when you make life work, Meg.”
“Sure I am.”
“It’s not ‘good for someone who’s blind’; it’s just good.”
She tilted her head, hearing under the quiet words a layer of steel. He’d taken her words personally and was offended at the idea on her behalf. “True. Maybe the compromises are more subtle. I don’t try some things now that I once would have. The adjustments are too great.”
“I hear you’re learning to ski.”
She laughed. “Two lessons and I about broke my leg.” She smiled at him and tossed off the melancholy that came when she talked of unfulfilled dreams. “Come on, Stephen. Serious discussions can come later. Let’s walk. I want to show you my town.”
He helped her with the jacket. “Do you need to lock up the house?”
“Pull the door and it will lock. I’ve got keys in my pocket.”
She snapped her fingers for Blackie. His harness was on a peg beside the door. He accepted it eagerly, his tail slapping against her jeans as she knelt beside him.
“He’s been a good addition to your life.”
“An excellent one. He’s saved my life a few times when it comes to crazy drivers ignoring lights.”
Stephen’s hand touched her arm. “I hope he’s not averse to working with a partner. There will be two of us watching for crazy drivers today.”
She found the fact he was up front about it reassuring. “I think Blackie likes you. Just be careful not to confuse him and point left when I say right.” He held the door and they stepped outside. She tightened her grip on the harness. “Let’s walk toward Main Street; I need to stop by the bank.”
“Sure.”
The sidewalk wasn’t wide enough to walk abreast without crowding Blackie. Stephen moved them to the street.
Meghan wasn’t sure about it. “Walking on the street is dangerous.”
“Silverton has how many cars total in the entire town?”
“Good point.” She settled into a rhythm with Blackie, the dog’s stride naturally fast. She liked heading somewhere with Blackie confidently leading the way. His assurance became hers, and she could move without worrying what was ahead of her.
“Tell me about your town.”
She turned her head toward him and smiled. “I’ve decided there are three types of small towns: the sad ones that are dying because people are moving away; the confused ones formed by transplanted residents from big cities trying to learn to function in small communities; and the best kind, like Silverton.”
She motioned to the houses on either side of the street. “Families have lived here for generations. The town is thriving but not trying to attract large numbers of new residents. The town has a heart to it in the library, post office, and restaurant. A center in its church. And functionality in its bank, general store, and pharmacy. The pace here is balanced between work and family.”
“Silverton has always been part of your dream—a community that is part of your life.”
“It’s one of the reasons it was so hard to translate my dreams to a big city. I wanted this small-town background. And this place fits my nursing career so well. Working in the hospital was just about treating the sick or injured. Here I’m part of my patients’ lives, and I know what’s going on with their jobs and their families. I’m able to go with Ashley on her rounds and sit and talk with Dad’s patients, have the follow-up conversations that can ferret out the small facts that can influence medication levels and recovery times.”
“Ashley’s been your father’s head nurse for several years, right?”
“Forever it seems. She was the reason I wanted to be a nurse. I’d go hang out with Dad at the clinic, and Ashley would show me what she was doing and why. She’s lived here for over twenty years; there are no secrets from her in this town. My blindness helps sometimes. Diabetes, age-related injuries, chronic pain—I understand the frustration of knowing what it’s like to battle something day after day. People are more willing to listen to my suggestions because I’ve been there.”
“You’re happy back here, with your job, your house?”
“Yes. It’s home, Stephen.”
“I’m glad.” He touched her arm. “The bank is just ahead.”
“I’ll be about ten minutes.”
“No hurry. Why don’t we meet at JoAnne’s store?”
She nodded, wondering what her friend would think when Stephen walked in. At least JoAnne would be able to tell her what Stephen looked like after months away.
Meghan walked toward JoAnne’s store, glad Stephen had offered to stay a while. Spending the next hour with him would be the highlight of her week.
“I’m right here, Meghan.”
She paused at the words.
“The bench by the restaurant. I got sidetracked.”
She heard the smile in Stephen’s voice. With a small signal she had Blackie take her to join him. She sat on the bench beside him.
“Your friend was giving away samples of her muffins. Slip off your glove.”
She did so and he handed her a still-warm muffin. “Mmm…blueberry and wonderful.”
She stretched out her legs, settled back, and grinned as she broke off a piece. “I stop and get one of these every morning on my way to work.”
“If she makes pies like this too, I can see why you claim the restaurant makes the best pies in the state.”
“Good enough I’ve learned to take a lot of walks. This is another reason Silverton is special. It’s kind of hard to do this in Chicago.”
“True. Any more errands you need to run?”
“That was the only one.” The bench was freezing. She got up and stomped her feet to get some warmth back in them. “Let’s head back to my place and walk fast so I can warm up.”
He laughed and let her pull him to his feet. He didn’t release her hand.
She was glad she knew the streets, for it was hard to concentrate with her hand in his. She had so many questions for him, but at the core there was only one. “Tell me about your travels, Stephen. Did you find what you were searching for?”
He didn’t answer her for a long time. “No, I didn’t. But the time away was the break I needed. For years life has been driven by my career, by close family ties. Both of those have changed now in permanent ways. I don’t know yet what I want in their place.”
“I’m an expert on building a new life. You start with the foundation, the things that matter the deepest in your heart. Everything else you fit in around them.”
“A good perspective.”
“Are you going to resume your paramedic job?”
“I don’t think so, and that’s a pretty hard pill to swallow. I don’t want to walk away, and yet I don’t want it back as it was.”
“Give it time, Stephen. You’ll make the right decision. I’ve known you for years and I haven’t seen you make a strategic mistake yet.”
“Oh, I think I’ve made a few.”
He turned her direction—she heard in the change of his voice that he was looking at her. She squeezed his hand rather than say anything.
They were nearing her house. She took the lead, sitting on the top porch step to lean down and remove Blackie’s harness. “I know you need to go soon if you’re to get to Chicago to see Kate before it gets too late. I’m so glad you came.”
He
took a seat beside her. “I’m sorry I won’t be here to help with your piano.”
“Ken will bring at least a couple guys with him. Next time you’re in town, you can hear it after it’s tuned.”
“I’ll be back, Meghan. I’ve gotten pretty attached to the pace of small towns over the last few months.”
“You’ll find me at Dad’s clinic, or here, and I would love to buy you a piece of that world famous pie.” She folded Blackie’s harness as he scampered away, free to roam the yard. “I have a favor to ask.”
“Anything.”
“Can I see what you’ve become while you were away?”
“What do you mean?”
“Let me see your face.”
He stilled, which made her fear she’d asked that of him too soon. Then she heard his soft sigh and his hands clasped hers. He leaned over and lifted her hands to touch his face. “I’m older.”
His smile wasn’t perfect. It was a little bit higher on the right, but it leveled out as it grew to full breadth. She traced his mouth and that smile, ran her fingers across his cheekbones and around his eyes up to his forehead. “I like your face; it’s solid with a little character added with your slightly crooked nose.” She lifted her hands to trace the hairline around his face. “You haven’t aged. My memory of what you look like is stuck in time from five years ago.” She grinned as she lowered her hands. “I just thought you’d be flattered to know that.”
“I’ll take it. I’ve gone a bit gray, Meg, and the lines on my face are permanent now.”
“Growing old isn’t so bad.” She liked the new image she had of him in her mind. “I’m more adventurous now that I can’t see what my hair color looks like. I just go by the reactions I get from people to find out what works and what doesn’t.”
“Blond. I really like blond.”
“It feels small to try to get your attention with my hair color.”
“Nevertheless, a guy appreciates it.” He took her hands and kissed her palms. “I have to leave.” He stood.
Flustered by his actions, she tried to figure out where to set her hands without making it obvious she wanted to press them together to capture the kiss. “I know.”
Blackie bounded up the stairs, pushed into her arms, and dropped a find in her lap. “Yuck.” Stephen’s kiss had just got slobbered. The baseball was nearly chewed up and it was cold all the way through. “I was really hoping you had lost this for good, Blackie.”
He barked. She judged which direction her yard would be and tossed the ball. Blackie scrambled away. She wished she could see the chase she could hear.
“That dog loves you.”
She smiled. Not only that, but he knew how to get her out of an awkward moment. “It’s mutual. I hope you have a good welcome home. Call me tonight? Just to let me know you got there all right?”
“I will. Good-bye for now, Meg.”
She listened to him leave, his footsteps growing fainter. She lifted her hand to wave as she heard his truck start, then got to her feet. Jesus…thanks. I was worried about how he was doing. Stephen would be back. Her life had just gotten a lot more interesting.
Blackie bounded up the stairs to join her. “Come on, friend. Company is coming for dinner.”
Twelve
Welcome home!”
Stephen stopped, one hand on the light switch and the other holding his duffle bag. People were three deep in his home: the O’Malleys, guys from the fire department, former coworkers from emergency services. “Should I go away for a few more minutes so you can try to fit another person in here?”
Jack laughed and caught his arm to tug him inside. “The dynamic duo is back together, brother. Bring on the food!”
Laughter rippled around the room and the sea of people parted to let Stephen in his own home. His sister Rachel was in the center of things, directing food, drink, and people crowding the kitchen. She pushed through to meet him, and he hugged her tight. “How did you know when I was coming?”
“Meghan called and offered to hold you there a bit longer; she guessed your drive time back. This was the crew that was free on short notice. A bigger group will celebrate your arrival this weekend.”
I should have just kept driving.
Rachel laughed at his expression. “You know how many people dream about just taking off and driving around the country for several months? Everyone wants to hear the details.”
“I’m staggered.”
Jack slapped him on the back. “You were gone for months and managed to come back with only one bag?”
Stephen dug out his keys. “You have got to see the new wheels. The truck is in the drive. You might want to bring up what’s in the passenger seat for me.” Kate was sure to be in this crowd somewhere, and he was going to need that gift.
“You got it.”
Jack looked so smugly happy that Stephen wanted to drop a headlock on him and ask why, but he had a good idea of the cause. His brother had gotten himself engaged. “Where’s Cassie?”
“That way.” Jack nodded down the hall toward the rooms Stephen had turned into an office and workshop. “I made sure we had at least one quiet spot in this medley so she could keep her sanity and not damage her sensitive hearing. You weren’t around to help me pick out the ring. Cassie calls it excessive.”
Stephen laughed. “A good beginning, Jack. I’ll find her.”
He moved through the crowd, greeting friends, his hand getting mangled in handshakes and his shoulder thumped in welcome. He spotted Kate coming toward him and his smile became a touch uncertain as he assessed her first reaction. “Hi, Kate.” She was beginning to show, just a little. He knew her well enough to see the subtle signs. Her face was beautiful. His smile broadened. He was so proud of her.
She laughed as she hugged him. “You were gone a long time.”
“I brought a stack of photos from every town I passed through.” Stephen looked around the crowded rooms, then reached down and picked up Kate. “Coming through,” he warned people, walking down the hallway.
Her arms strangled him. “Stephen, put me down!”
“Quiet.” He caught Dave’s attention and saw his surprise, then got a laugh and a thumbs-up.
The noise dropped as he left the main gathering. He heard Cassie’s laughter from somewhere ahead and elbowed open the guest-room door. He sat Kate on the bed and then spun a chair around so he could sit facing her. “I unerstand you have news. I want to hear it firsthand.”
Her face softened. “I’m pregnant.”
He brushed her hair back, studying the changes in her face. “How do you feel about that?”
Her smile about burst from her face. “Thrilled. Terrified. Dave is doing some major hand-holding. I’m sicker than a dog most of the day, but it’s fine. I can do this. I’m going to be an awesome mom, Stephen.”
“What’s your due date?”
“July 10.”
“You’ll be early,” he predicted. Her pregnancy was good news, but also news with so many implications. “I heard you made some major changes at work. I’m sorry it was such an abrupt transition.”
“I’m now a detective in robbery, fraud, and white-collar crimes. The first rule of parenting is to watch out for your kids, and I guess it starts now with a safer job. You know how much is stolen every year in this city? There is more stolen jewelry and equipment floating around this city than you could pick up in a lifetime.”
“And I bet you try to find it all. I heard you eventually want homicide.”
“A dead body at least gives you a case with boundaries. Most robberies are nothing but paperwork, and the goods are easy to disperse.”
“Homicide won’t help the nausea any.”
“A hurdle I’ll cross when I get to it.” She studied his face. “You look different, older. Was the trip okay?”
Stephen wasn’t sure how to answer her. Every answer he gave to that question just suggested another. “Useful, but not everything I had hoped. Not having to wear a watch helped. Th
e solitude made me realize how much I missed everyone.” He smiled at her, not wanting to get into a deep discussion. “I came back as promised.”
“Are you going to stay in Chicago now?”
He ran a knuckle along her chin. “A decision left for another day.”
Jack tapped on the door. “If this family meeting is over, you might want to give her this thing.”
“What in the world?” Kate said.
Stephen got up to take the huge rabbit. “I saw it and thought of you, Kate.”
“You got that for me?”
Stephen laughed. “For my new niece or nephew. When are you going to know which it is, by the way?”
“I’m not telling. And I can’t believe you bought that.”
Stephen set it in her lap and it dwarfed his sister. “It’s perfect.”
“Come cut your cake, buddy,” Jack said. “Oh, and priorities, man. We’re playing basketball tonight. Anyone tell you that yet?”
Stephen looked around the rabbit to see Kate. “Are you providing the bleacher commentary?”
“Absolutely.”
Stephen turned to Jack. “Can I plead out of practice now before the evidence becomes obvious?”
“As a homecoming gift I’ll carry you this game,” Jack offered. “Late night basketball will get you back in the swing of things fast.”
The gym was hot and smelled of sweat and floor wax. Stephen couldn’t get enough oxygen to his muscles to walk, let alone make a decent attempt at a jump shot. His legs, arms, and back muscles were quivering. It was a basketball game O’Malley style. The intensity over every point made it feel like a small war, nobly fought. The elbows and fouls were being tempered, but the pushing and shoving had an art to it.
He wasn’t going to let Jack down. He wasn’t going to… Stephen took the basketball in a snap throw and forced his feet to move again.
“You’re a bit rusty,” Marcus said, sweat dripping off his face as he checked Stephen’s forward progress with an outstretched hand and backed toward the basket. Marcus had flown back just to say welcome home and to join the game. Only he would think that a good use of time and money.
It would take breath to be able to answer. Stephen replied by faking out Marcus and going around him. Dave blocked him and Stephen passed off to Jack, relieved to have the ball out of his hands. Jack slammed it down in a dunk.