Ashlyn turned and looked up at me, and I offered her a hopeful smile. This was blowing up in my face at a fast rate. Why the fuck had I decided to do this?
“If we’re owning up about our past partners, I guess I should tell you about Jack and me?” she admitted with a sigh, and turned to look at Jack longingly.
What the actual fuck?
“Remember when we went to Vegas and you had me up against the window? That was top three, best sex I’ve ever had,” Ashlyn admitted, then she stepped out of my arms and moved toward Jack. I watched, mouth agape, as she placed her hand on his chest and gave him a wistful smile.
“You were definitely unforgettable, Ash.” Jack smiled, and the two of them fell into each other’s gaze.
My body went rigid. How did I not know about this? Jack and Ashlyn? My girlfriend and my fucking friend?
“What’s wrong, Josh?” she asked, turning to face me and offering me a sweet smile. “If we are sharing stories, then you need to accept mine.”
“You and Jack have been together?”
“Is that a problem?” she pushed.
“This is fucking brilliant,” Tate said, then huffed and moved beside Ky to watch how this played out.
What could I say to that? Jack smirked like he was sitting on a fucking goldmine, and Ashlyn looked back at me expecting an answer. My head was going crazy. How did I not know about this? When the fuck did she go to Vegas?
“Nope, not a problem at all,” I replied with little conviction.
“Jack and I have never been together,” Ashlyn stated in a sassy tone. “Now stop messing with your friend’s head and come dance with me. It’s not very nice to be played, is it?”
“What the fuck?” I stammered.
“You just got played, asshole,” Jack said, and kissed Ashlyn on the cheek before she bowed and accepted their high fives like a pro.
The guys burst out laughing, and I looked at my girlfriend with newfound respect and a need to kiss the fuck out of her.
“You coming to dance with me or what?” she asked, before strutting away with an extra swing in her hips.
I didn’t stick around. I crossed the dance floor with her in my sight. Her hips swayed like pure seduction, while her hands lifted the hair off her bare back. Ashlyn turned around, and her heated gaze hit me full force. I turned her body so her back was to my chest, then rested my hands on her hips, and she pushed back into my body. Her arm threaded around my neck, and her fingers cut through my hair. I dropped my face to her neck, my mouth falling just near her ear. I groaned as her nails raked down the back of my neck.
Her body shuddered against mine, and I tightened my grip on her hips, pulling her back until there was not an ounce of space between us. My cock swelled as she continued to grind her ass into me with every movement she made, as the seductive music flooded the bar. The effect she had on me had always been so immediate, it was like turning a switch, and I would be hers in entirety. The truth was, she wasn’t mine, but I was hers. I had been hers from the very start, way back when she gave me her greatest gift.
I turned her in my arms until we were chest to chest. My hands were now resting on her lower back, and her arms surrounded my shoulders. I pulled her tight against me.
“I’m happy. I don’t think there is anything that could wreck this moment,” she whispered.
“I never thought I’d be good enough for you. I always knew that you deserved the world. But I’m going to give you the world every day I am with you. You’ll get my last breath, the last beat of my heart, and my last ounce of strength to make sure you are okay.”
“Can I tell you a secret?” she asked softly and leaned in. “You’ve always been good enough for me. No question about it, and we will take our last breaths together. I don’t want to imagine a time without you, especially now that I’ve only just gotten you. But when we go, we go together.”
“Josh, we need to go,” Ky said behind me, completely interrupting mine and Ashlyn’s moment, seconds before I was about to tell her then and there that I was in love with her.
“What’s going on?” I swung around and was greeted by my brother’s stern face, flickering with warning and anger.
“Lachlan’s turned up. We need to take the girls home.”
I didn’t hesitate. I stepped straight into protective mode as soon as I heard his name. This was getting beyond a fucking joke. He needed to piss off back to Australia immediately. My hand wrapped around Ashlyn’s, and I pulled her through the crowd toward the exit, with one goal in mind: to get her the fuck away from here. To say I was shocked when she suddenly stopped would be an understatement.
“Why are you stopping?” I asked quickly, pulling on our hands briefly to try and get her to walk.
“I need to know why he is doing this,” she said.
“Ash, I’m not letting him near you. Not again.”
“Josh, I need to know. I need to tell him one last time that I’m done. That I‘m with you.” Her face flashed with determination and a need to finally close this part of her life. I didn’t have a good feeling about this. This wasn’t going to end well, but how could I refuse her when she was looking at me like this was the key to finally saying goodbye that fucked up part of her life.
“Ky, where is he?” I asked before I decided against it.
“Just got word from Tate that he is out front. Apparently, Tanzi checked us all in on Facebook and he saw.”
“Come on,” I said, and she offered me a thankful smile.
In silence, we headed for the exit and the unknown. When we stepped onto the path, Tate and Jack turned to look at us, and Lachlan’s gaze found Ashlyn. She immediately dropped my hand and headed toward him.
“Why are you doing this? Just tell me why,” Ashlyn said sternly, and I watched as my girl straightened her shoulders and approached him.
“You want to know why?” he asked with a scoff. “Because even when we were in a relationship, I knew Josh was all you thought about. You thought you hid it, but I saw through it. The looks, the innocent touches, the way you spoke about him . . . like he was everything you wanted. What do you think that does to a man? You might have been sharing my bed, but I didn’t have all of you. That fucks with a guy’s head, Ashlyn,” he sneered.
“I was with you, Lachlan. You. Two years I spent with you, and you cheated on me repeatedly. I never cheated on you. I was getting ready to spend my life with you.”
He shot a look of pure fury my way. “Yeah, until Josh decided to grow a set of balls and make a move. You would have run to him without question.”
“You don’t know that, Lachlan. It was you that ended our relationship. It was you who fucked around behind my back, and it was you who left. I refuse to listen to this bullshit when you have no reason to spit it. Leave, Lachlan. Go back to Australia and forget about me.”
His mouth twisted into an evil smirk as his gaze locked onto Ashlyn. My blood boiled. His eyes on her made me possessive, like I was an uncaged animal wanting to rip the throat of whoever stood between me and my prize. I took toward her, and grabbed her hand in protection.
Anger was a fire I knew I could contain, but fury was a wildfire, so uncontrollable that it had the potential to destroy everything in its path. Fury was now sweeping through me at a rapid rate.
“You’ll never forget me, Ashlyn. I’ll make sure you remember me for the rest of your life. A constant reminder.”
Without another word, he turned around and walked down the street and away from us. There was no snarky remark, no threatening glare, and no intimidating stance as he walked off. Nothing. Ashlyn’s grip on my hand lessened, and she took a deep breath as I tried to understand exactly what had just happened. It was way too easy. Way too fucking easy. My protective instincts kicked in, and my only concern was Ashlyn and getting her the fuck out of here.
“Come here, Ashy.” I pulled her against my chest, and wrapped her with my warmth and protection. My eyes didn’t leave his retreating figure until his was ou
t of sight. Though out of sight, his unpredictability still lingered in the air.
“Is it over?” she whispered against my chest, and her arms around my waist grew tighter. “It can’t be that easy.”
“He isn’t getting near you again Ashy. I promise you that. Tomorrow we are going to the police station and putting a stop to this.” She nodded against my chest before lifting her head and finding my eyes. “Let me take you home. We can have a bath and I can take care of you.”
“I’d like that.” She whispered, and gave me a weak smile.
“Ky, can you stay with Ash? I’m just going to grab us a cab across the street. They never stop out front of here for some reason.”
Ky nodded, and I reluctantly untangled my arms from around Ashlyn. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her to his side. Her eyes found mine and, in that split second, it felt like a million words were said between us, but I couldn’t understand one of them. It was the craziest of feelings, like the universe was trying to tell us something that neither of us could hear.
I needed to take my girl home and as far away from this scene as possible.
Unease was sitting in my chest, and I fucking hated it.
I warned you, Ashlyn. Here’s a constant reminder.
My stomach shot to my throat, and my grip tightened on my phone as I looked down at Lachlan’s words.
“Ash, what’s wrong?” Ky asked beside me as I froze against his body.
I frantically dialed Josh’s number. “We need to go. I have to get to Josh.”
“What’s happened? Talk to me. What’s wrong with Josh?” His eyes pleaded with me.
I pushed his arm away and started frantically looking for any sign of Josh. I didn’t have time to talk, I needed to find him, and then we needed to get as far away from here as possible.
The breath I didn’t know I was holding escaped when I found him about to cross the road. He was in sight. The tension in my body relaxed, and he spun around, as if he knew I was there, and his eyes connected with mine. The overwhelming need to yell out to him, to tell him exactly how I felt about him, shot through me. All I wanted was for him to know that I was in love with him, that I was his as much as he was mine. I didn’t want to wait a second longer, because a second may never be enough time.
A piercing screech of tires hit my ears and my head swung around. A blue sedan with tinted windows was approaching way too fast. My eyes locked with Josh’s, and everything seemed to move in slow motion. My movements, my heart rate, my breathing. Josh’s gaze darted from away briefly, before jumping back to mine for a split second. A second later his eyes were gone. The sound of his body colliding with the car was sickening, and the sound of the car speeding off was devastating.
“Josh,” I screamed and bolted toward him, not caring about anything but getting to him. My heart thundered in my chest as I focused entirely on his lifeless body crumpled in the middle of the road. He wasn’t moving. I heard people yelling and the scuffle of movement all around me, but all I cared about was getting to him. Everything seemed like it was going in slow motion. I had to be having a nightmare, because this couldn’t be happening. Not now. Not when I was about to tell him I was in love with him.
I dropped to my knees and wrapped him in my arms, lifting him as much as I could. Wetness immediately seeped into my dress, and I could smell blood tainting the air. His blood. His body was limp, all strength gone, and I was cradling him like he was a newborn baby.
“Josh, look at me. Please, look at me,” I cried, shaking him lightly, desperate to bring him back. “I need to see your eyes. Why won’t you show me your eyes?”
I dropped my forehead to his chest and let the sob crash from me. “Someone call an ambulance,” I attempted to scream, but it came out as barely a whisper. I sat on the road with his head resting in my lap, and ran my fingers through his hair. I knew he loved that. My dress was covered in his blood. It was coming from a head wound and seeping through his shirt, the silver of the fabric changing to a disturbing shade of red, and his lifeless body refused to show me any sign of hope.
In the distance, the sound of sirens held my attention, and I was thankful someone had the capacity to call.
“Joshy, they are coming. Can you hear that? Squeeze my hand to tell me you can hear that?”
Nothing.
“I was going to tell you tonight that I am in love with you, and that I’ve always been your girl. I was going to tell you that my heart has always been yours.” I sobbed louder and shook him a little harder. “Please show me that you can hear me. Please squeeze my hand. Josh, this cannot happen. Not now.”
Time stood still as I waited, but there was nothing.
“Please don’t leave me,” I whispered softly as my vision was stolen by a cascade of tears. “I need you to fight.”
“Ash, let them in,” Ky said in a hollow voice behind me.
I hadn’t even thought of Ky. I hadn’t thought of anyone. I broke my gaze from concentrating on Josh and turned to find Ky. His face was blank, but his eyes screamed everything as he looked at his brother.
“Miss, you need to let us help him.” When a paramedic grabbed my arm and attempted to pull me away, I lost it. I shouted, thrashed around, and screamed at him to leave me alone. The thought of being away from Josh was unimaginable. He needed me. He had taken care of me for so long and made sure I was okay, and now it was my turn to take care of him. I had to make him okay.
“I have to stay with him. He needs me,” I screamed, and pushed on the paramedic’s chest as all sense of reason was lost. At that moment, they weren’t paramedics, they were simply people trying to take him away from me.
“Come here, Ash.” I was pried from the ground, and Ky pulled me to his chest, my back to him, and his arms wrapped around me, pinning mine down to my side.
I lost control. My loud sobs filled the night air, and I soon lost control of my breathing. Panic hit me as I watched the paramedics work frantically on Josh. He still hadn’t opened his eyes. Why wasn’t he opening his eyes? I had no idea what the paramedics were saying, but I couldn’t ignore the looks they were giving each other.
“We are taking him to Memorial. I would suggest making your way as soon as you can,” the paramedic that I hit said.
“Is he going to be okay?” I whispered, afraid of the question, but desperate for the answer. “He needs to be okay.”
“We are trying our best, miss.”
“Let’s go and get you cleaned up,” Ky said softly beside me after we watched the ambulance scream off down the road. Tate, Savannah, Tanzi, and Jack had all huddled together, waiting for our next move. Eden was standing next to Ky quietly crying.
“Take me to the hospital,” I whispered, my voice hoarse and void of emotion.
“Ash, let me take you home so you can get out of your dress and get into some clean clothes that don’t have . . .” Ky couldn’t say the word blood.
“I don’t want to go home. I want to go to Josh. He needs me, Ky. Take me. Please,” I begged, my words getting louder and more desperate.
“We can go and get some clothes, then bring them to the hospital,” Savannah said softly and squeezed my hand. “Take her to the hospital, Ky.”
“I need to be with him.”
Ky grabbed my hand and hailed a cab, and soon we were heading to the hospital. I couldn’t recall the trip even if I tried. The image of Josh’s lifeless body had ingrained itself in my memory, and that was all I saw and all I could think about.
“Ash, we are here,” Ky said softly beside me, pain evident in his words.
I looked out with the window to find Memorial Hospital illuminated in front of me. There was no time to talk. I opened the door and ran for the entrance. The thought of the unknown was dangerous. I had no clue what I would find. Was he okay? What had happened since they took him? What would I find?
“Let’s go.” Ky grabbed my hand and we headed to the desk. The lady looked up at us, and she must have been hired for her calmin
g smile alone. The effect she had on me was instant.
“We are Josh Crawford’s family,” Ky said through a thick voice.
“I will call the doctor right away.”
What did that mean? Did they always call the doctor right away? I squeezed Ky’s hand and his gaze fell to me. He offered me a smile, but his eyes told another story. He had seen the blood, he had seen Josh not moving, and he had seen the car. It hit me like a freight train. Suddenly, I felt like I was going to be sick. This was premeditated, this was with intent, this was . . .
“Lachlan,” I whispered. How could someone who once said he cared about me do something so severe? “It was Lachlan.”
“What did you say?” Ky pulled me toward the waiting room and I moved in a daze. “Ashlyn, what the fuck did you just say?”
I pulled my phone from my bag and went to my text messages. Lachlan’s message was still taunting me on the screen, and I handed it to Ky. He cursed under his breath, and I watched his knuckles turn white with the grip he had on my phone.
“That motherfucking asshole,” Ky spat, then quickly stood from the seat and began to pace. Eden rushed to her fiancé’s side and began speaking quietly with him, soothingly calming him down. Ky pulled his own phone from his back pocket, and I knew he’d be calling the police.
“I am looking for the family of Joshua Crawford.”
My head snapped around. I shot up from my seat and moved toward a man dressed in scrubs.
“Is he okay?” I asked
“He is in surgery for a serious abdominal wound. He has lost a lot of blood, and there is some internal bleeding we are trying to get under control. He took a hard fall, and there is some swelling on the brain. Our concerns are the head trauma and internal bleeding. We are trying our best, miss, and I will ensure that you are kept informed.”
Hours turned into days, tiredness turned into mind-altering exhaustion, and food became non-existent. I was surviving on the hope that I would see his eyes soon. A constant stream of people came to visit, but all I saw was him. I was head over heels, entirely, and unconditionally in love with Josh Crawford, but there was a possibility that he would never know. He had become my beginning, my end, and everything in between, and I refused to believe that he would never know that.