“I was given tolerance growing up. And I am drastically stretching the definition to make it applicable. I learned to do as I was told. I learned that if I obeyed him, I would not be the recipient of his animosity. At times, I was even rewarded.” Keely feels something flutter in her stomach, but it leaves her quickly. “I never new kindness, or empathy, or happiness. Those are very new to me. It’s very overwhelming, but in a pleasant way.” He bends at the knees so he is eye level with her. Keely feels frozen in place as he continues.
“I have always understood feelings of fear, and hatred, loneliness, and anger. I have experienced lust and want. But I did not know I was capable of these other feelings. I hardly recognized them. And they were not all yours, you see? Because you were scared, I was scared. But because you were scared, I also felt for your pain. I felt empathy and it was all mine. When you are sad, I feel sad, but I worry for you. When you feel happy, I am happy for you. When I get angered, I instantly feel regret because I do not want you to feel angry.
“The fact that I am capable of feeling anything for anybody else outside of lust or hatred is a miracle. It brings me joy and peace. I have never known this.
“Just from feeling what you feel I now know love. That one was hard. I felt it strongest when we found the human you refer to as your dad. It was so substantial. It filled me. I thought I may burst. I had never felt anything like it. I did not realize what it was at the time or why it was happening. Then, when I left the realm to return your parents…” He shakes his head. Puts his large cool hands on Keely’s arms. “I thought I was dying. I thought you were dying. I was never so scared in my life. The way you felt, it hurt me. It hurt me inside. I never want you to feel like that again.
“I do not know why this is happening. I dislike it and welcome it at the same time.” He let’s go of her and straightens his legs. “You ask me why I gave you the Grimoire. It is because through you I learned to empathize. That is where you imagine yourself in another’s situation, correct?”
Unable to speak, Keely nods stiffly.
“Yes, all right. I asked myself how I would feel if I were you. And then I had to ask myself how you would feel. You would not want this to happen. You would not want to be forced to do something that would hurt another. You would want to be warned. You would want a choice.”
Keely clears her throat softly. “It’s a prophecy. Someone looked into the future and saw me do this. I don’t have a choice. If I did, they would have prophesized that I didn’t do it. Apophis was right to try and kill me.”
Anger flows through Keely again. Nearly overtakes her. “Do not say that,” Asmoday says through his teeth. “You do have a choice. The future has not happened yet. You can change the prophecy. I have watched it change already. The girl has not always worn your face. She was many others before she was you. As Apophis killed them, they changed. But you do not have to die to change it again. Go to your Hierarchy. Explain why your father wants you. Obtain their allegiance and protection.”
“You’re going against our father?” Keely asks, dismayed.
“I am choosing correctly.” He dips his head at her. “My loyalty is to you, Princess. Whatever you choose.”
“Please don’t call me that. And please stop bowing. You’re a Prince; you shouldn’t bow to your sister.”
Very quickly, something tweaks at Keely’s heart. Discomfort. Deception. Guilt. She gives him a look that lets him know she feels it. “Asmoday, what are you lying to me about?”
He brushes his hand over his honey colored hair. “I have not lied,” he says quietly. She tests his statement against her—his feelings. He’s being honest.
“Why did you feel guilty a moment ago?”
“I cannot reveal all to you at this time. That is all. I promise I am not telling you untruths.”
Keely was not born yesterday. She has pretty good instincts, probably because of her heritage. “Are you lying by omission? Because by not telling me something I should know you are lying to me still. Or allowing me to believe something that isn’t true is just like lying. Are you doing either of those things right now?”
After a moment’s thought, Asmoday simply says, “Yes.”
“Are you going to elaborate?”
“No.”
“Then how can I trust you?”
“Because you know you can.”
The pitiful thing is he’s right. She knows without a doubt, she can trust Asmoday. So what is he keeping from her? And why?
Aware of her reluctance, Asmoday takes her hand. Electricity runs between their fingers. The cord hums. Elation and comfort swell Keely’s heart. But it’s all wrong. She shouldn’t feel this. Not with him. Not with her brother.
“It is all right.”
“No it’s not. Why are you doing this to me?”
“I am not. It is happening to me too.”
“I don’t want it.” It’s so much easier when she’s with Nick. She knows her feelings are hers. She doesn’t question her safety with him. She doesn’t feel sick for caring about him.
“I’m sorry, Keely.”
And she knows he is.
“I’m sorry too. This must be just as strange for you as it is for me. I keep forgetting that. But I want you to understand, I cannot ever act on these feelings. It will never happen. You’re my brother.”
“Where I am from, things like that do not matter. Often, families mate within themselves to keep the lineage pure.”
“It matters to me. I wasn’t raised where you’re from. Here we’re taught it’s wrong. I think it’s gross. Not you yourself. Just the thought of being with my brother.”
Asmoday nods as if he understands, but Keely isn’t convinced he does. “I can care for you as a brother does. For now. Maybe you will come around,” he says.
“I won’t. You understand that I have feelings for Nick, don’t you?”
“Yes. But you love me as well.”
“No. I feel something else for you. It’s this cord binding us. Witnessing your emotions and mine. Always feeling connected to you. And you’re my brother. We have the same blood, so there’s that connection as well.”
“Now that I understand love, it is very easy to recognize. You have love for me. I think you also have lust, which I thought was love for a long time, but now know is very different, although often comes together.”
Keely pulls her hand out of his. “I do not. You’re my brother.”
“If you say it enough, you may just talk yourself out of your feelings,” Asmoday laughs. “We are connected. I know your convictions as well as I know my own. You cannot hide from me.”
“Please just stop.”
He sweeps his hand over her cheek, brushing back her hair tenderly. “I will take you home.”
“I was going to Bryon’s.”
“You are safer in your home,” he states firmly.
“Why? Why am I all of a sudden safer there? Apophis got in there before. He can do it again.”
“Apophis will not come for you there. He knows we are watching. You are being protected from multiple sides. He would be a fool to make an attempt on your life.”
“He wants me too. Just like our father. He had the Grimoire. He must know the prophecy as well as you. I think he wants me to fulfill it now. I don’t know what changed his mind. I guess the power. But I think he’ll try to get to me before my father does. And if I don’t do this for him, he will kill me so I can’t do it for anyone else.”
“Then you should not be out wandering around a corn field by yourself,” Asmoday says. He raises a brow.
“I’m not. I’m with you. And you can take me to Bryon’s.” Keely smirks at him.
“I would prefer for you to go home and call Bryon to come to you.” Before she can interject, Asmoday adds, “You cannot afford to take risks. Not if you want to change your destiny. Besides, you are very damp. You could use a change of clothing.” His eyes graze over her disheveled appearance.
Keely knows he is right once
again. It’s a little annoying. “When I get upset, I have panic attacks. I feel trapped in that house,” she admits.
“Then I will come get you. No more jumping from your window.”
“Were you watching me?”
“You were upset. Scared. I came to check on you.”
“And you watched me jump from the window? You could have helped me out.”
Asmoday smiles at her causing her insides to jump. “I did not know you were going to do it until you were already committed. I didn’t want to startle you and cause you to injure yourself.”
“Well, thanks. I guess.”
“I have been staying close, so next time wait for me. I will come,” he assures her.
“You’re staying close? Where? Is that why I haven’t felt the cord snap?”
“Yes,” he says, only answering her last question. “I do not want to experience that again.”
“Yeah, neither do I.”
Twenty-Five:
“Keely? Nick is here,” Kevin says from the other side of her bedroom door.
Keely looks around trying to orient herself. In a panic she looks at Asmoday who apparently finds this very amusing. She doesn’t think she will ever get used to him—whatever it is he does. Teleporting? Anyway, she has only been back a few seconds and her body doesn’t quite know it. If her dad opens the door and finds Asmoday here, he will flip. And her mom… She can’t even finish the thought. “I’ll be right down,” Keely croaks.
Asmoday wanders over to her desk. Starts poking through the piles of sketches. “Your artwork is really quite nice. Your father is a painter. You have a similar eye.”
“Um, I don’t want to be rude, but I have to be. I need to go downstairs.” Keely throws a thumb over her shoulder at the door.
“Yes, go. I will be fine.” He picks up a sketch of the field they were in minutes ago. He is mesmerized by it. “You captured it perfectly,” he says in a whisper.
“You’re going to stay? In my room? Alone?”
He gazes at her and smirks. “I promise not to raid your panty drawer.”
“Oh, ew. You better not. And don’t leave my room.”
He starts to bow his head, but stops himself. “Of course.”
Keely stares at him for a second hoping this doesn’t blow up in her face. On her way to the door, she catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She’s a mess. Her clothes are wet and her hair is tangled and wind-blown. She does an about face and goes to her closet. Tugs a plain black v-neck tee and a pair of jeans off their hangers. Goes to her bathroom and changes as quickly as she can. She rips a brush through her hair causing it to frizz to twice its normal volume. It will have to do.
She practically runs through her room with one last glance at Asmoday. One side of his mouth lifts slightly in a wicked smile that does very bad things for her nerves. She shuts her door and bounds down the stairs.
Her first instinct when she sees Nick is to hug him, but she doesn’t. Not with her mom in the room. Not after the conversation they had. She smiles at him in place of the hug. He doesn’t smile back.
“What’s wrong?” she asks quickly.
“We’ve been summoned. Tomorrow at noon.”
“Both of you?” Kimberly asks stunned.
“Yes.”
“What do you mean summoned? To what?”
“The Hierarchy. They’ve decided to take council.”
“Oh.” Keely has mixed feeling about this. After all, Asmoday just suggested she go to them for help, but Nick may get in trouble. “Wait, why do they want me to go?”
“I don’t know for certain. My dad says they just want to speak to you. To meet you.”
“They want to make sure you’re not a threat,” her mom says. “It’ll be fine. You just tell them what you told me. That you want to honor the Angel and attend Deus Lucem Academy to train for Guardianship.” Her expression doesn’t match her words. She doesn’t look like everything will be fine.
“Should I be worried?”
“No.”
“Yes,” Nick sighs.
Kimberly fixes Nick with a glare. “Don’t make her anxious. She’s prone to panic attacks.”
“Excuse me, Mrs. Kiem, but don’t lie to her. She needs to be prepared.”
“But you said they just want to meet me.”
“They do, Keely. They want to get a feel for you. Like your mom said, they need to verify that you aren’t a threat. But the fact that your dad wants you alive…” He leaves it in the air. They have already discussed this. She knows how bad this could get.
“Mom, you said no more lies.” She stares heavily at her mother. “Do you think it is at all possible that they could decide I am too big of a risk? Could they decide to kill me?”
“Of course not,” Kevin says. “They’re the good guys, right?”
Nobody says anything for much too long.
“Right?” Her dad tries again, worried now.
“It is a small possibility. But nobody even knows why he wants you. And as long as you stay true to the Angel, you should be fine.”
“I’m dead.” Keely shakes her head as if she is trying to shake the thought away. “I’m dead for sure.”
“Didn’t you listen to me at all? Just tell them-”
Keely cuts her off. “I know why he wants me. And it’s bad. They’re going to kill me when they find out.” She sinks into a chair. She doesn’t want to die yet. Not now. Not when Asmoday has just given her hope.
Nick kneels in front of her. “Keely, what did you find out?”
It takes Keely a second to look at Nick. She’s in a daze, consumed with her realization of undeniable death. “I read the prophecy in the Grimoire. I bring Hell to Earth. I open the realms. And I make the Heavens fall. Every evil being arises from Hell. They tear the worlds apart. Kill everything, over, and over, and over. There is no peace for anyone. And I do it. Asmoday said I can change it. He said he’s watched it change before. But the Hierarchy, they’ll never believe it. How can I be so powerful? It doesn’t make sense.”
“How do you do it?” Nick asks gently. He regrets his wording as Keely grimaces.
“It was like this story I read once in school. This guy goes to Hell to save his wife. He sings a song so beautiful that he’s told they can go. But his wife must walk behind him the entire way until they make it out of Hell. He’s not allowed to look back at her. Not even once. If he does, she has to go back. It was exactly like that. I don’t know what I’m not allowed to look back at, but I do it. I know I shouldn’t, but I do. The stairs just kept going forever like they never ever stopped no matter how far I made it. Almost like I was meant to spend eternity walking these steps. Like it was a trick. When I looked back, I swear I looked at myself, but it’s impossible. I wasn’t really there.”
“How can he make her do that? How could he ever force her to walk up a never ending flight of stairs?” Kevin asks.
“Threatening her,” Kimberly answers.
“Bargaining. Trading someone she loves for this simple task,” Asmoday says behind them. “Go up these stairs without looking back and you may free your loved one.”
“Oh, crap,” Keely breathes. “You were supposed to stay in my room.”
Asmoday shrugs. “You needed me.”
“I—I did not.”
“Why was he in your room?” Nick grumbles.
“Why is he in our house?” Kimberly seethes.
“Who is he? Who are you?” Kevin redirects his question.
“Asmoday. I brought you back from the Demon realm you were imprisoned in.” He holds out his hand and Kevin takes it as he tries to recall his face.
“Don’t shake his hand! He’s a Demon, Kevin,” her mom shrieks.
“Why not? He’s my brother. And he helped us. He saved you! If it wasn’t for Asmoday, we would all be stuck in another realm. In fact, we would probably be dead.”
“Keely, you don’t understand how things work. I’m grateful for the help he offered us, but he did t
hat on his father’s command. He is not trustworthy. He’s a Demon.”
“He’s part Angel. And he gave us the Grimoire. He warned me about the prophecy. He has proven to me I can trust him, Mom. Please trust me if you can’t trust him.”
“Get out of my house. Now,” Kimberly spits.
Keely stands in front of Asmoday. “He’s my brother. If he isn’t welcome than neither am I.”
“Keely, what are you doing?” Nick stammers.
“You’ve done something to her. You put a Demon spell on her,” Kimberly accuses.
“He didn’t do anything to me except help me. He’s on our side.”
“No. I am on your side,” Asmoday corrects her. “And I am making things difficult for you. I’ll go. But I will be close if you need me.”
Keely turns around to protest, but he’s already gone. She knows he stayed true to his word and stayed close. The cord hardly pulls.
“What’s going on, Keely?” Nick looks hurt and she can’t stand it. She doesn’t know why it’s so important that they accept Asmoday. It just is.
“You can’t do this again. If you act like this in front of the Hierarchy, they will find you as a traitor for sure,” Kimberly says. She massages her eye brows. “It’s punishable by death. You mustn’t have any connection to him. Can’t you see I am only trying to protect you?”
“But I am connected to him.” More than they know. “I’m not an idiot. I’m not going to go tell the Hierarchy that I think my brother’s a super special guy. But I need you guys to understand. I am seriously starting to feel like you don’t want anybody in my life but you, Mom.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“Is it?” Kevin lifts his brows.
“Yes, it is,” Kimberly answers coolly. “I have to protect her. No matter what it takes.”
***
Nick sits across from Keely unsure where to begin. The way she had acted with Asmoday, something is bothering him. How had she gotten so close to him so quickly? How is she so certain she can trust him? He knows his time alone with her is limited. If he could just find the right words.