"What do you want from me?" I yelled, but my voice cracked. He only smiled and drove off quickly before Kai could do anymore damage. My fires cradled my failing body before spiraling themselves into feint smoke. I could barely stand and my chest and stomach felt like they were bruised all over. Kai and I stood for a few moments before we said anything to one another, watching the trail of dust from the SUV fade into nothing.
"Mahalo," Kai said with a tired grin.
"No kidding," I winced. The feeling had finally returned to most of my body. So did the massive pain from my throbbing wounds.
"Boy Max…you sure do bring out the best in people don't you." He laughed loudly. I tried to join his enthusiasm but it hurt too much to laugh. He turned to me with my black guitar in his hand. It was scuffed up but still in good condition.
"You sure you don't wanna finish what you started the other night with your car?" I asked smugly and coughed up a little blood in the process. I gently took my guitar from his sweaty hand.
"Now’s your chance."
"Don’t tempt me brother," he said as he twirled the bat in his other hand.
“Ouch,” I snapped the muscles in my neck into place and slid my instrument around my sore chest.
"What was that about?" he asked, worried.
"I don't know. I'm just glad you were stalking me too." I laughed but had to stop as my ribs cracked a little. He watched me closely.
"Ya, lucky you." He cringed at the sight of me.
"What were you doing out here?" I asked. He helped me back to Frank’s tattered truck and leaned me against the side of it. It’s cool metal felt soothing on my still hot skin. Kai threw his bat into the back of the truck and kneeled down to the damaged tires.
"Frank told me you were here. I don't know why I came all this way, I just did." He shrugged nervously. "I guess I wanted to talk."
"I’m glad you came," I said. He let a smile curl along his mouth.
“No prob…Mad Max.” A puff of laughter shot out. Man, I hated that nickname.
“I miss high school,” I said with a sore breath.
“Huh?”
“These real world bullies hurt!” I coughed. He patted me on the back.
"Well, let's get you some new tires,” Kai said as he dialed out on his cell phone. “Your uncle’s gonna kill you if you bring home his baby like this."
There was so much to say, so many questions to be asked, but I just smiled at him, hurting. Thank god for my best friend. Thank god for Kai.
“Okay,” I smiled.
Brothers - 15
~Sweet Emotion: Aerosmith~
Tuesday - 11:49 a.m. - November 21st.
Oz and I climbed into Frank’s truck with its brand new tires snuggly in place and hit the road. After some coaxing, Frank gave me Kai and Sam’s address and I found the truck driving itself over there. Apparently they’d been living together since Madison was born. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't hoping to see Sam and Madi, but this visit was for Kai. A boy’s day out. I walked up and knocked on the door nervously. After a few moments Kai grumpily opened the door. His hair was a mess and he was wearing some of the same clothes from the day before.
"Oh…it's you," he huffed. He seemed awfully crabby. "Sam isn't here. She's at class and Madi is with her grandma."
"Good, because I'm here to see you," I said quietly. There was sadness in my tone about not being able to see Madi’s big round face or Sam’s amazing green eyes. I hoped he hadn’t noticed it.
"What?"
"The boys are back." I smiled and pointed over my shoulder. He looked past me and at the truck. He noticed the two surfboards stretched along the bed
"What’s going on Max?" he asked, unsure.
"It's a beautiful day. I'd hate to waste it inside," I nudged.
"Since when do you surf?" he asked.
"Since Fiji," I winked. He looked at me cautiously.
"I don't know. I haven't had breakfast yet," he made an excuse.
"Well, its lunchtime," I corrected.
"Okay…I haven't eaten lunch then," he snapped. I didn't quite understand why he was being so stubborn after what happened yesterday. It almost felt like the good old days.
"Then let's eat," I snapped back. I brought my hand up to his face and inside my grip was a bag with two oversized sandwiches. His eyes grew bigger and he leaned into me.
"The works?" he asked, with his armor fading.
"Come on, it's time for us to catch up. Besides, I think I owe you a thank you for yesterday." I shook my head. "I owe you an explanation about the last year too."
"All right," he gave in. His stomach rumbled violently and he grabbed it as he blushed. I smiled and led him to the truck.
"Woof!" Oz greeted him with a cheerful yap. He patted him on the head and slid in the truck.
"King Oz!" he said with a big smile. He twisted his fingers inside the fur behind his ear just like Oz liked. I started the truck and headed for our destination.
Paia beach was known for it's perfect waves, beautiful golden sand, and the perfect conditions for surfing for beginners to pros. The weather conditions were perfect. The wind rolled over us, bringing the smell of the waves with it. As we stood side by side in our shorts just before those breaking waves, I felt a calmness fill me.
"I haven't done this in a while," Kai announced.
"I almost died the last time I tried this," I laughed. Kai looked at me surprised. My hand slid to the ribs I had broken before and I winced. I flipped the hair from my eyes and charged the incoming waves. Kai hollered at the top of his lungs and followed my footprints into the water. Oz bounced along the shoreline, barely getting his paws wet as he did. He barked as loud as he could as he watched us paddle away.
We surfed for hours. We laughed, we crashed, and we bonded. It was hard on my beaten and bruised body but it felt good, it felt right. My best friend and the unforgiving ocean. We were young. We were crazy. Most of all, we were together again. Brothers.
After a while we found ourselves sitting in the back of the truck drinking some ice cold bottled waters. I wanted to talk to him about Sam and Madi but thought I should start with an easier subject.
"I wish Marcus was here," I said. Marcus Allen was the third piece to our friendship tripod. The last member in our broken band. If I closed my eyes I could still see his bright red Mohawk and crazy smile.
"He’s long gone my friend. His family yanked him back to Australia after graduation." Kai shook his head in disappointment.
"Really?"
"He’s working on some ocean liner that docks off the shore of Sydney. The last time I talked to him he was having a blast."
"Wow. Did he ever ask about me?" I asked, even though it didn't really matter now.
"Yeah, once or twice. He was a little sad about the band breaking up but that turned to worrying about…" he paused.
"Go on," I pushed.
"Sam and the baby."
"Oh." I shut up. Oz looked at us as the awkward silence set in. The waves smashed against the shore finally breaking the silence.
"If I had known he was in Australia I would have looked him up," I said sadly.
"Down under huh? Sounds like you were quite busy this past 365," he said. His tone was more accusing than lighthearted. I pretended like I didn't notice it though.
"Asia and I went everywhere bro. Mexico, Fiji, China…if we felt like going, we did." I shrugged my shoulders. "She’s the one that taught me how to surf."
"I guess that's what took you so long to come back," he said with a growing understanding.
"I guess." I drifted off watching the waves. They were growing more restless by the hour.
"I understand that no one told you about Madison, but how could you stay away when you heard about Frank’s health. I mean, come on Max, he's had a lot harder time than he puts on." Kai’s eyes searched mine.
"Kai, no one told me about his health."
"Not even Asia?"
"Nope," I whispered under my breat
h. "I’m not sure why."
"Oh," he said.
“That’s why I came back alone.” I hopped down from the truck and Kai quickly followed with a soft thud.
4:56 p.m.
We walked slowly along the beach until we found a dry spot and sat down. The sand was still hot and Oz chased after both of us with a bounce. I was unaware that I was making all kinds of grunts and whines with every move I made. Kai noticed whenever my sore body scolded me and frowned.
“You can ask me what you’ve been avoiding all afternoon Max,” he said from nowhere. It shocked me at first but made my mind feel at ease.
"If I had known about Sam and the baby I never would have left. You gotta believe me Kai," I pleaded. He just sat next to me quietly. Oz barked softly at the tension in the air.
"At least she was in good hands." I smiled halfheartedly. He fell quiet with a growing thought on his face.
“I’m sorry for the other night brother.”
“It’s okay,” I cringed at the thought.
“Running you down with my Mustang was a little bit of overkill,” he laughed.
I smiled lightly. “Nah! Totally justified.” I found my laughter too. Kai watched me closely before speaking again. The waves grew louder in front of us.
"Sam and I didn’t plan on hooking up Max, it just sort of happened," he huffed.
"Kai, you do not have to explain yourself. You did nothing wrong," I said.
"But I knew how much she meant to you and still I…" he stuttered. I nudged his arm.
"Don’t. I'm the one who should be sorry. And I am. I should have never left the island…or the band. I really enjoyed our music. It helped heal the issues I was dealing with. It was so hard to walk away from it. It was so hard to walk away from you too. I'm sorry Kai." I really was.
"Well, it's okay. If you hadn't of left, Sam wouldn't have been able to talk me into continuing my schooling. I just might shoot for my degree in teaching music. How funny would that be?" he laughed out loud.
"You…a teacher? God save the children," I kidded. We laughed together for a moment.
"Sam has a way of bringing the best out of people."
“I know,” I finished softly. He grew very still and quiet. The water slid up onto the sand, carrying a hint of unnerving truth.
"She still loves you Max."
"What?" I was shocked by his words. I was scared that he would see how much I wanted those words to be true. I had hurt him so much after I left and I didn't want to be a source of pain for him anymore.
"No." I tried to ignore him.
"Yup."
"Don’t say stupid things like that!" I warned, even though I wanted it to be very true.
"The big question is, how do you feel about her?" he asked nervously. I felt trapped. I tried to change the conversation to something else.
"I didn't come back for her." That was a half lie and he could see that. "I came back to help Uncle Frank."
"Yes, but things have a way of changing. You should know that better than anyone my friend." He sounded more grown up than I ever heard before.
"You mean little Madison," I sighed. He nodded in agreement.
"I love her like my own daughter Max but I never let myself forget who she really was. Where she really came from." I couldn't believe my ears. My mouth grew dry.
"I’ve been so mad at you all this time but I would never let her see that, you know…" he trailed off a little. His hands were squishing sand through them. I sat stunned and still.
"Really?" I asked.
"She needs to know the truth. Where she came from. Who she came from. Madison loves and cares for me, but the truth is, she needs her father." Kai smiled even though I could tell it hurt him to say that.
"Kai, I don't know what to say." I was numb.
"How bout, Kai I'm sorry. Let's start over."
"Kai, I'm sorry brother. You are my best friend." I placed my hand on his shoulder. "Its time I started acting like it."
"Woof, woof!" Oz announced as he jumped in between us. Kai reached out and patted his head and then grabbed my hand and shook it firmly. And just like the old days…we were healed. Almost as good as new.
"So…do you still play?" I asked. He smiled wide.
"Silly rabbit…" he chuckled.
At that precise moment, the ocean grew angry and the waves rustled and swished. Dark clouds danced along the edge of the horizon filling the air with a familiar smell. It slammed into us with the force of a tropical storm. Kai looked at me cautiously and smiled.
"Good old days…huh." He laughed and I joined in but inside my stomach rolled over.
“Asia’s home.”
Blackout - 16
~Crash Into Me: Dave Matthews Band~
7:32 p.m.
After the day at the beach with Kai, I found myself staring at the surrounding island from my bedroom window. The night sky was covered in a darkening purple hue with streaks of orange and red. Thunderclouds could now be seen even closer to the shore. That made me nervous. It had been a little over an hour since I had dropped Kai back home. My room still smelled of the beach and all its comforts. Oz scratched at his ears, shaking out loose grains of sand.
“Max, dinners on the table,” Frank called from the kitchen. I pulled my earbuds from my head and jumped to my feet. Oz followed with a shake of his fur.
"I’m starving," I said as I slid up to the table. Oz paced back and forth by his dog dish until I slipped him some food off of my plate. Frank shook his head in disapproval.
"You know it took me over a year to break him of that habit," he huffed. I smiled before shoving the night’s dinner into my mouth. Frank just leaned back in his chair.
"It’s good to have you home son," he said giving up. "So how did today go? Did Kai calm down finally?"
"I think so. I feel bad for putting him through this situation. It seems like all I do is hurt everyone around me lately," I sulked. Frank just looked up at me with a smile.
"Not everyone," he made me feel at ease even though I didn't totally believe him.
We spent the beginning of the evening catching up on the day’s events. As we both finished up our dinner a knock came from the front door. Before I could get up from the table to answer it, Frank called out from his seat. His voice cracked as he did.
"Come on in."
"Uncle Frank?" I looked worried. The door swung open quickly and to my surprise, Kai stumbled in.
"Hey Uncle," he said kindly. He scratched the top of his hair nervously and adjusted the purple and black bag that was slung around his shoulder.
"Kai?" I asked as his eyes met mine.
"Glad you made it!" Frank said standing up from the table. I began to do the same when my eyes focused on Madison cooing from the car seat in his arms.
"Hey there lil' bug!" Frank shouted and scooped her up from the seat. He kissed her on top of her head, which was wrapped in two balled up ponytails. The little bundles popped from both sides of her head. I watched paralyzed, as Frank safely squeezed my daughter in his arms. He had obviously done this many times in her 6 months on the planet.
"You miss your uncle?" he asked full of joy. Madi cooed and reached for his cheeks with her chubby little fingers. When her hands met his skin his smile grew twice its size and his cheeks flushed bright red.
"Ahh, that's my favorite thing in the whole world!" Frank said with a curious look on his face. His eyes spoke to me as he said the words. I didn't understand at the moment but I would later in the night.
"Well, it looks like she's content," Kai interrupted shyly. "I’ll be back for her later."
"You don't have to go Kai," I said nervously. I didn't know if I offered because of guilt or because I was scared to be with Madison alone.
"Yes, please stay. There’s plenty of food for all of us," Frank added. Kai shuffled nervously with Madison’s diaper bag under his arms before relinquishing it to the couch. His eyes watched Madi for a second then found me standing quiet and unsure.
&n
bsp; "Nah…I think it would be best," he nodded and then reached out his hand for me to shake. I did so and watched his expression change from sad to happy and back to melancholy.
"Are you sure?” I asked one last time. He nodded it was okay, but I could tell it was hurting him more than he was letting on. He turned to leave, and just before he reached the front door I stopped him.
"Thanks brother."
"Mahalo," he smiled, and stole one last glance at Madison before heading to his car. As he started it up and drove away I noticed he hadn't replaced the broken headlight from the other night. My back tightened just thinking about it. I shut the front door and turned back to my uncle who was holding Madi directly in front of me. My hands popped with heat at the surprising sight.
"Go on son. Don't be shy. She's missed you."
"What?" I felt my heart start to race.
"Trust me,” he winked. "You’ll understand."
"Okay," I said in a whisper. Slowly I took her from his cradled embrace and placed her across my arm like I was holding a football. Sweat filled my hands as she squirmed slightly while I found my confidence. She quickly settled into my arms and began mumbling as if she were about to say something. Her eyes smiled up at me and my heart exploded. I couldn't stop smiling as we finally and formally met.
"Nice to meet you Madison Lee."
"Ooooooooeeeeee!" she squealed and reached out her hands for my face. Her fingers wiggled as she tried to reach my cheeks. I looked at my uncle Frank for reassurance and he nodded it would be just fine. I leaned my head down closer for her to reach, and when she finally did, the world came alive. I wasn't ready for our first touch.
Her left hand tickled my bangs for a moment before it found my cheek, and her right hand slid softly over my chin to my bottom lip. My face filled with warm heat. A warm and familiar heat. As my body reacted to her touch it heated up accordingly. She felt it too, and became very still holding onto me. The heat pulsed through us as if we were one. An extension of each other’s aura. The heat pulsed and I could hear her heart. Not just the beating but also the blood as it flowed, and the strength it had.