‘No big rush,’ Duke told her. ‘Finish your burger.’
‘I’ll take it with me.’ Holding the hamburger in one hand, she stood up. She shoved her chair away with the backs of her legs. ‘You guys can fight over the end of my Pepsi. It’ll be watered down anyhow by the time I get back.’
‘I don’t know about this,’ Norman said.
‘Face it,’ Duke said, ‘you don’t know about much.’
‘I know, but . . .’
‘Don’t you worry about anything,’ Boots told him. She squeezed his shoulder. ‘I’m gonna show you boys the best time you ever had.’
She released his shoulder.
On her way toward the door, she sashayed past several crowded tables. Conversations stopped. Customers turned their heads. Stares latched onto her from every direction.
‘Look at ’em,’ Duke said. ‘The gals, they all hate her, figure her for a tramp. The guys, they’re thinking how they’d give their left nut to shack up with her for a night. They hate us just as much as the gals hate Boots. We’re the guys that have her, know what I mean?’
‘I guess so.’
‘We’re gonna have her all to ourselves, and those poor bastards know it. They can’t stand it. They’re ready to blow their pants right now.’
‘I really don’t know if we should do this.’
‘The room?’
‘Everything.’
‘Man, you’re a case.’ Shaking his head, Duke fixed Norman with a look of exaggerated disgust and pity. ‘You don’t watch out, you’re gonna go through your whole life and get to the end of it and find out you never done nothing. You gotta go for it, man. That’s what life’s all about.’
‘If you’re living a beer commercial.’
‘Ha! Good one.’
‘Maybe I should just go ahead and pay for a room,’ Norman suggested. ‘I mean, I don’t like this idea of trying to get a freebie.’
‘Take what you can get,’ Duke said. ‘Somebody wants to hand us a room for the night . . .’
‘But—’
‘Look, you’re just scared of getting caught. But the thing is, so what if we do get caught? Say Boots finds herself a horny clerk at the front desk – she gives him some head or whatever – he lets her have a room for the night and the boss shows up and finds out all about it. The clerk’s the guy that gets his ass reamed. We walk. The worst that happens, maybe we have to fork over whatever it would’ve cost us to get the room legitimate. See?’
‘I guess so. But it still seems like a bad idea.’
‘That’s ’cause you’re also scared to fuck her.’
Norman’s face flooded with heat. ‘I am not.’
‘Sure you are. Shit, she’s a scary bitch any way you slice it, but it’s gotta be real scary for a guy like you.’
‘What do you mean, like me?’
‘A guy that’s never done it before.’
‘Who says I’ve never done it?’
‘You told me.’
‘No, I didn’t.’ Norman frowned. Had he admitted such a thing to Duke? No! No way! He’d never told that to anyone, much less to Duke.
‘You want a piece of advice?’ Duke asked.
‘I don’t need any advice.’
‘Sure you do.’
‘Yeah, sure.’ Norman rolled his eyes upward. ‘Okay. Let’s hear it.’
‘First thing you gotta know, dames aren’t the same down there as guys.’
‘Very funny.’
Duke tried to look offended. ‘No! I mean it! Seriously. They haven’t got tools.’
‘Ha ha.’
‘You think I’m joking? I mean it!’
Norman started to laugh for real.
Leaning forward, Duke whispered, ‘It’s like their tools got cut off, and all they’ve got left is just this gash. Now, what you’ve gotta do is put your tool in her gash. Get it?’
‘I get it. Jeez!’
‘And you gotta make sure you stick it in the front. You don’t wanna stick it in the back by mistake, you know what I mean? That’s a good place to stay away from.’
Norman, shaking his head, tried to stop laughing.
‘Stick it in the right spot, and you got nothing to worry about.’
‘Except maybe for the clap and a few other things.’
‘No problemo, good buddy. They got a vending machine in the john.’
‘You mean, like for condoms?’
‘Right on. They got three varieties. We’ll go in and stock up, soon as we get done eating.’
Norman nodded, but wrinkled his nose. ‘Those things aren’t all that safe, you know.’
‘Sure they are. Ain’t you never heard of “safe sex”?’
‘I heard the things don’t work too well. Like they break when you’re inside her, or sometimes come off . . . that sort of stuff. A lot of the time. Like once out of six. I mean, that’s not very good odds. That’s the same sort of odds as playing Russian roulette with a six-shooter.’
Duke frowned. ‘So what? Just fuck her five times, you’re okay.’
Duke looked quite pleased with himself.
Norman laughed a bit, then said, ‘Good one.’
‘Yeah, I know. I’m a card. Fact is, though, you gotta lighten up. Who’s to say she’s even infected? It might be as sweet as a rose garden down there.’
‘Can we ask her?’
‘Like anyone’s gonna admit it.’
‘Do you have it?’
‘You mean AIDS?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Like I’d admit it?’
‘Do you?’
‘Don’t know, don’t care.’
‘How can you not care?’
‘I don’t worry about shit like that. I live how I wanna live. And I know one thing for sure – I ain’t ever gonna let no disease nail my ass. When I go out, I go out quick in a blaze of glory.’
‘Not with a whimper, but a bang.’
‘Right on.’
‘I think I’d rather live to a ripe old age and die in bed,’ Norman said.
‘Yeah? Gee whiz! How come that doesn’t just surprise the everlasting shit outta me?’
‘Make fun all you want. I don’t intend to go around risking my life for a few minutes of . . . screwing Boots, or whatever.’
‘So you’re telling me you ain’t gonna fuck her?’
‘It just isn’t worth it.’
‘What’re you aiming to do, stand around and watch us?’
Another blush scorched Norman’s face. ‘I don’t know,’ he muttered. ‘I figured I’d . . . just sort of go along to the room and see what happens.’
‘I know what’ll happen. We better load up on rubbers.’
By the time they were done eating, Boots still hadn’t returned. They asked for coffee. Then Norman gave Duke a five-dollar bill.
‘What’s this for?’
‘Why don’t you go up to the cashier and get some change? Whatever you need for the vending machine.’
‘Quarters.’
‘Yeah. Then, you know – go in the john and buy whatever we need.’
‘We? Changed your mind already?’
‘Okay, whatever you need.’
‘Sure you don’t wanna come along?’
‘No, that’s all right.’
‘Aren’t gonna run out on us, are you?’
He hadn’t thought of that.
I could!
Yeah, right, he thought. I couldn’t even make myself drive away from the beach, so I’m sure I’m gonna take off when I’ve got a chance to end up in a motel room with her.
Duke stood up from the table, his chair scooting back, its legs squawking against the floor. Breadcrumbs speckled his pants. Norman watched him walk toward the cashier’s counter. The five was in Duke’s left hand. His right hand was shoved partway down the seat pocket of his jeans. He walked with a swagger. Norman couldn’t see his face, but he knew there had to be a smirk on it. Guy acts like he owns the world.
Norman tried to picture himself wa
lking like Duke, dressing like him, smirking like him.
I’d look like a total dork, he decided. I just haven’t got what it takes.
What does it take? he wondered. Does it have to be in the genes to be able to wear jeans like that? Like you’re James Dean. Better yet, would I really want to be like him? Let’s face it, the guy’s a macho jerk and not all that bright.
But he sure is cool. What does it take to be that cool? Plenty of time attending the school of hard knocks, Norman supposed. More balls than brains. I wouldn’t want to be that way, he told himself. And a voice in a shadowy corner of his mind whispered, What good are brains if you’re a gutless wonder who hasn’t got any balls at all? You’ve gotta take chances sometimes or what’s the point? Carpe diem! Seize the day! Seize the babe! If you chicken out with Boots tonight, you’ll regret it the rest of your life.
Chapter Fourteen
Flushed and a little breathless, Boots dropped into her chair. She smiled at Duke and Norman in turn.
‘We was starting to take you for missing in action,’ Duke said.
‘Not me.’
‘How’d it go?’
She shifted onto her left buttock, reached behind the right, and pulled something out of the rear pocket of her jeans. A big green plastic tab with a key dangling from its end.
A smile spread across Duke’s face. ‘All right!’
‘Jeez,’ Norman gasped. ‘You did it?’
‘Told you I was gonna, didn’t I?’ Boots glanced around the diner as if worried about spies, then quickly returned the motel key to her seat pocket. ‘It was a cinch.’
‘Really?’ Norman asked. He found himself leaning toward her and whispering. ‘You really got it for free?’
She beamed at him.
Duke grinned. ‘I think Normy here wants all the juicy details.’
‘That so, Normy?’
‘Well . . .’
‘You wanna sit here and listen to how I got the room for us, or you wanna go over and get into it?’
‘You betcha,’ Duke said
Norman felt as if his face might burst into flame. ‘Well . . .’
‘I think Normy’s got the jitters.’ Duke winked.
‘Would you quit calling me “Normy”? Please?’
His eyes on Boots, Duke said, ‘Normy’s got such a bad case of the jitters, he’s about ready to shit.’
Boots reached out and took hold of Norman’s hand. ‘What’re you scared of?’
Norman shrugged.
‘He’s scared of getting in trouble with the law,’ Duke explained. ‘And he’s scared of you. He’s a virgin.’
‘Good deal!’ She squeezed Norman’s hand. ‘I’ll break you in.’
‘That’s what scares him.’
‘Well, it ain’t like I’m gonna hurt him.’ To Norman, she said, ‘You got nothing to be scared of, honey. This is gonna be the night of your life. Now, come on. Let’s get the show on the road.’ She took her hand away and stood up.
‘Are you sure you don’t want anything else before we go?’ Norman asked her. ‘Did you get enough to eat? Do you need a Pepsi, or something?’ To Duke he said, ‘How about you? Don’t you want another hot dog, or something?’
‘Only one thing I’m hankering to eat, good buddy, and it ain’t a doggie.’
Boots laughed. She leaned over the table and slapped Duke’s shoulder.
Giving her a smirky grin, Duke got to his feet.
‘Just a minute,’ Norman said. He took out his wallet and removed a few dollars for the tip. His hands trembled as he folded the bills. He tucked them under a corner of his coffee mug. When he stood up, his legs were shaking. My God, I can’t believe I’m really gonna go through with this.
I’m not going through with anything, he told himself. Not yet, anyhow. Just gonna pay the tab and go outside. Which I’d be doing anyway. Then maybe I’ll go over to the motel with them, or maybe not. I can do whatever I want. Nobody’s holding a gun to my dick . . . Dick? I mean head. I wonder if she gives head . . . Oh Christ, I’m rambling . . .
Duke and Boots waited by the cashier’s counter while Norman paid. Then they walked ahead of him to the door.
As he followed them he gazed at Boots. She wore her tank top, cutoff jeans and white boots. In the beach parking lot, by the side of the Cherokee, Norman and Duke had watched her put them on. Still in her black-knit bikini, she’d stepped into the shorts and pulled them up. Then she’d slipped the tank top down over her head. After putting her boots back on she had untied the yarn at the nape of her neck, then reached up under the back of the tank top, fiddled around in there, and finally plucked out the upper part of her bikini.
It had gone into her big denim bag. But her bikini pants had stayed on.
Norman wondered if she was still wearing them, just as he was still wearing his swimming trunks underneath his shorts. He stared at the seat of her cutoffs. The blue denim, faded almost white, was packed tight with her buttocks. No telltale lines to indicate that she was wearing the bikini pants underneath.
Maybe they’re in her bag by now.
Maybe she took them off for the benefit of the motel’s desk clerk.
She’s such a slut, he thought. Not to mention ugly. I’d have to be nuts to mess around with her. She doesn’t even seem like a real human being. Maybe she’s the result of a laboratory experiment. A fusion of human and pig DNA. Now she’s broken free. She’s making men pay for the result of the obscene experiment. The Revenge of the Pig Woman . . . oh Christ, I really am rambling . . .
But it excited him, knowing that her breasts were loose inside her tank top and that she was probably naked underneath the ragged cutoff jeans. Wow, gonna make bacon tonight . . . with the Pig Woman. Gonna make a hog of myself, too . . . The excitement made Norman dizzy.
Duke stepped outside the diner and held the door open. Boots walked out. Norman followed her.
The sun must’ve just gone down. When they’d entered the diner, the town had been aglare with sunlight flashing off glass and chrome. Now all the harsh brightness was gone. The white rocks of the parking lot had a mild blue tint. Boots rubbed her arms.
She started to turn around, so Norman glanced at the slit side of her cut-offs. Bare skin was all he saw.
Nothing under there but Boots, he thought. I’d bet on it. Pure pork belly . . . Stop it, he told himself. You’re making crap jokes because you’re nervous.
Stick around and find out what’s under those tight clothes of hers.
‘Wait’ll you get a look at the room,’ she said. ‘It’s a real peach.’
‘You’re the peach,’ Duke told her.
Lame, Norman thought.
Duke stood there in a slouch, a smirk on his face, both arms up as he ran a comb through his greased waves of hair.
If he doesn’t watch out, Norman thought, he’ll get mobbed by autograph hounds.
Except there seemed to be no one nearby.
And the stars Duke seemed to be copying were long dead: Elvis, Dean, Brando.
‘You gonna stick around?’ Duke asked.
Norman looked across the road at the Golden Anchor Inn and felt himself go squirmy inside.
A nice place. A long, two-story complex, with stairways going up to the second level. Freshly painted. Lights aglow in some of the big picture windows of the guest rooms. The parking lot was about half-full, and the red neon VACANCY sign seemed shockingly bright in the mellow dusk. ‘Well . . .’
‘Come on,’ Boots said. Turning away, she sashayed toward the Cherokee. The blue-white stones of the parking lot made crunching sounds under her boots.
‘How about it, Norm?’ Duke asked. ‘Ready to turn the boy into a man?
‘We’ll see. I don’t know yet.’
Boots smiled over her shoulder. ‘If you don’t, you’re gonna be sorry.’
Either way, he thought, I’m gonna be sorry. They climbed into his car.
Boots, in the back seat, leaned forward as Norman started the engine. He saw her face be
side his shoulder. ‘We even got cable TV and a thingy . . . a channel-changer.’
Norman started to back up. ‘What should we do about parking?’ he asked.
‘Just do it.’
‘Maybe we shouldn’t use the motel parking lot. Since we aren’t registered?’
Duke snorted. ‘You worry too much. Or have I already mentioned that?’
Norman shifted, and steered toward an opening near the far end of the lot. ‘Maybe you’d worry,’ he said, ‘if it was your car.’
‘Your old man’s car, you mean?’
‘Which is even worse,’ Norman pointed out. ‘I’m just saying maybe we should leave it on the next block, or something. Just in case something does go wrong.’
Boot’s fingers slid gently up the back of Norman’s head. ‘Nothing’s gonna go wrong, honey.’ The fingers felt awfully good. They made him squirm. But then she took them away.
‘Let’s put it smack in front of the room so we don’t have to walk so far.’
‘I don’t know.’
Maybe that isn’t such a bad idea, he thought. If we’re right at the door, we can hurry into the room really fast. Less chance of being spotted. Not to mention how convenient it’ll be if we need to make a quick getaway. What if somebody takes down the license plate?
Big deal, Norman told himself. I do worry too much. My God, it’s not like we’re committing a federal offense or something. We’re getting a free room for the night, that’s all. It’s no big deal, so lighten up.
No traffic was coming, so he steered onto the road and drove slowly back toward the Golden Anchor.
‘Don’t take the first entrance,’ Boots told him.
Norman saw that it led directly to the portico in front of the motel office.
‘There’s another way in,’ she added. ‘Down at the other end of the lot.’
‘Scared your clerk might wanna join the party?’ Duke asked.
‘He ain’t on duty now. His boss was coming on.’
Norman groaned.
‘Don’t worry, hon. What he don’t know ain’t gonna hurt him.’
‘What if he checks somebody into our room?’
Duke laughed.
‘I don’t see what’s so funny. It could happen.’
‘It ain’t gonna happen,’ Boots said. ‘My guy took care of it.’