Page 31 of The Shorter Poems


  In whatso please employ his personage,

  That may be matter meete to gaine him praise;

  780

  For he is fit to vse in all assayes,

  Whether for Armes and warlike amenaunce,

  Or else for wise and ciuill gouernaunce.

  For he is practiz’d well in policie,

  And thereto doth his Courting most applie:

  785

  To learne the enterdeale of Princes strange,

  To marke th’intent of Counsells, and the change

  Of states, and eke of priuate men somewhile,

  Supplanted by fine falshood and faire guile;

  Of all the which he gathereth, what is fit

  790

  T’enrich the storehouse of his powerfull wit,

  Which through wise speaches, and graue conference

  He daylie eekes, and brings to excellence.

  Such is the rightfull Courtier in his kinde:

  But vnto such the Ape lent not his minde;

  795

  Such were for him no fit companions,

  Such would descrie his lewd conditions:

  But the yong lustie gallants he did chose

  To follow, meete to whom he might disclose

  His witlesse pleasance, and ill pleasing vaine.

  800

  A thousand wayes he them could entertaine,

  With all the thriftles games, that may be found

  With mumming and with masking all around,

  With dice, with cards, with balliards farre vnfit,

  With shuttelcocks, misseeming manlie wit,

  805

  With courtizans, and costly riotize,

  Whereof still somewhat to his share did rize:

  Ne, them to pleasure, would he sometimes scorne

  A Pandares coate (so basely was he borne);

  Thereto he could fine louing verses frame,

  810

  And play the Poet oft. But ah, for shame

  Let not sweete Poets praise, whose onely pride

  Is vertue to aduaunce, and vice deride,

  Be with the worke of losels wit defamed,

  Ne let such verses Poetrie be named:

  815

  Yet he the name on him would rashly take,

  Maugre the sacred Muses, and it make

  A seruant to the vile affection

  Of such, as he depended most vpon,

  And with the sugrie sweete thereof allure

  820

  Chast Ladies eares to fantasies impure.

  To such delights the noble wits he led

  Which him relieu’d, and their vaine humours fed

  With fruitles follies, and vnsound delights.

  But if perhaps into their noble sprights

  825

  Desire of honor, or braue thought of armes

  Did euer creepe, then with his wicked charmes

  And strong conceipts he would it driue away,

  Ne suffer it to house there halfe a day.

  And whenso loue of letters did inspire

  830

  Their gentle wits, and kindly wise desire,

  That chieflie doth each noble minde adorne,

  Then he would scoffe at learning, and eke scorne

  The Sectaries thereof, as people base

  And simple men, which neuer came in place

  835

  Of worlds affaires, but in darke corners mewd,

  Muttred of matters, as their bookes them shewd,

  Ne other knowledge euer did attaine,

  But with their gownes their grauitie maintaine.

  From them he would his impudent lewde speach

  840

  Against Gods holie Ministers oft reach,

  And mocke Diuines and their profession:

  What else then did he by progression,

  But mocke high God himselfe, whom they professe?

  But what car’d he for God, or godlinesse?

  845

  All his care was himselfe how to aduaunce,

  And to vphold his courtly countenaunce

  By all the cunning meanes he could deuise;

  Were it by honest wayes, or otherwise,

  He made small choyce: yet sure his honestie

  850

  Got him small gaines, but shameles flatterie,

  And filthie brocage, and vnseemly shifts,

  And borowe base, and some good Ladies gifts:

  But the best helpe, which chiefly him sustain’d,

  Was his man Raynolds purchase which he gain’d.

  855

  For he was school’d by kinde in all the skill

  Of close conueyance, and each practise ill

  Of coosinage and cleanly knauerie,

  Which oft maintain’d his masters brauerie.

  Besides he vsde another slipprie slight,

  860

  In taking on himselfe in common sight,

  False personages fit for euerie sted,

  With which he thousands cleanly coosined:

  Now like a Merchant, Merchants to deceaue,

  With whom his credite he did often leaue

  865

  In gage, for his gay Masters hopelesse dett:

  Now like a Lawyer, when he land would lett,

  Or sell fee-simples in his Masters name,

  Which he had neuer, nor ought like the same:

  Then would he be a Broker, and draw in

  870

  Both wares and money, by exchange to win:

  Then would he seeme a Farmer, that would sell

  Bargaines of woods, which he did lately fell,

  Or corne, or cattle, or such other ware,

  Thereby to coosin men not well aware;

  875

  Of all the which there came a secret fee

  To th’Ape, that he his countenaunce might bee.

  Besides all this, he vsd’ oft to beguile

  Poore suters, that in Court did haunt some while:

  For he would learne their busines secretly,

  880

  And then informe his Master hastely,

  That he by meanes might cast them to preuent,

  And beg the sute, the which the other ment.

  Or otherwise false Reynold would abuse

  The simple Suter, and wish him to chuse

  885

  His Master, being one of great regard

  In Court, to compas anie sute not hard,

  In case his paines were recompenst with reason:

  So would he worke the silly man by treason

  To buy his Masters friuolous good will,

  890

  That had not power to doo him good or ill.

  So pitifull a thing is Suters state.

  Most miserable man, whom wicked fate

  Hath brought to Court, to sue for had ywist,

  That few haue found, and manie one hath mist;

  895

  Full little knowest thou that hast not tride,

  What hell it is, in suing long to bide:

  To loose good dayes, that might be better spent;

  To wast long nights in pensiue discontent;

  To speed to day, to be put back to morrow;

  900

  To feed on hope, to pine with feare and sorrow;

  To haue thy Princes grace, yet want her Peeres;

  To haue thy asking, yet waite manie yeeres;

  To fret thy soule with crosses and with cares;

  To eate thy heart through comfortlesse dispaires;

  905

  To fawne, to crowche, to waite, to ride, to ronne,

  To spend, to giue, to want, to be vndonne.

  Vnhappie wight, borne to desastrous end,

  That doth his life in so long tendance spend.

  Who euer leaues sweete home, where meane estate

  910

  In safe assurance, without strife or hate,

  Findes all things needfull for contentment meeke;

  And will to Court for shadowes
vaine to seeke,

  Or hope to gaine, himselfe will a daw trie:

  That curse God send vnto mine enemie.

  915

  For none but such as this bold Ape vnblest,

  Can euer thriue in that vnluckie quest;

  Or such as hath a Reynold to his man,

  That by his shifts his Master furnish can.

  But yet this Foxe could not so closely hide

  920

  His craftie feates, but that they were descride

  At length, by such as sate in iustice seate,

  Who for the same him fowlie did entreate;

  And hauing worthily him punished,

  Out of the Court for euer banished.

  925

  And now the Ape wanting his huckster man,

  That wont prouide his necessaries, gan

  To growe into great lacke, ne could vpholde

  His countenaunce in those his garments olde:

  Ne new ones could he easily prouide,

  930

  Though all men him vncased gan deride,

  Like as a Puppit placed in a play,

  Whose part once past all men bid take away:

  So that he driuen was to great distresse,

  And shortly brought to hopelesse wretchednesse.

  935

  Then closely as he might he cast to leaue

  The Court, not asking any passe or leaue;

  But ran away in his rent rags by night,

  Ne euer stayd in place ne spake to wight,

  Till that the Foxe his copesmate he had found,

  940

  To whome complayning his vnhappy stound,

  At last againe with him in trauell ioynd,

  And with him far’d some better chaunce to fynde.

  So in the world long time they wandered,

  And mickle want and hardnesse suffered;

  945

  That them repented much so foolishly

  To come so farre to seeke for misery,

  And leaue the sweetnes of contented home,

  Though eating hipps, and drinking watry fome.

  Thus as they them complayned too and fro,

  950

  Whilst through the forest rechlesse they did goe,

  Lo where they spide, how in a gloomy glade,

  The Lyon sleeping lay in secret shade,

  His Crowne and Scepter lying him beside,

  And hauing doft for heate his dreadfull hide:

  955

  Which when they sawe, the Ape was sore afrayde,

  And would haue fled with terror all dismayde.

  But him the Foxe with hardy words did stay,

  And bad him put all cowardize away:

  For now was time (if euer they would hope)

  960

  To ayme their counsels to the fairest scope,

  And them for euer highly to aduaunce,

  In case the good which their owne happie chaunce

  Them freely offred, they would wisely take.

  Scarse could the Ape yet speake, so did he quake,

  965

  Yet as he could, he askt how good might growe,

  Where nought but dread and death do seeme in show.

  Now (sayd he) whiles the Lyon sleepeth sound,

  May we his Crowne and Mace take from the ground,

  And eke his skinne the terror of the wood,

  970

  Wherewith we may our selues (if we thinke good)

  Make Kings of Beasts, and Lords of forests all,

  Subiect vnto that powre imperiall.

  Ah but (sayd the Ape) who is so bold a wretch,

  That dare his hardy hand to those outstretch:

  975

  When as he knowes his meede, if he be spide,

  To be a thousand deathes, and shame beside?

  Fond Ape (sayd then the Foxe) into whose brest

  Neuer crept thought of honor, nor braue gest,

  Who will not venture life a King to be,

  980

  And rather rule and raigne in soueraign see,

  Than dwell in dust inglorious and bace,

  Where none shall name the number of his place?

  One ioyous houre in blisfull happines,

  I chose before a life of wretchednes.

  985

  Be therefore counselled herein by me,

  And shake off this vile harted cowardree.

  If he awake, yet is not death the next,

  For we may coulor it with some pretext

  Of this, or that, that may excuse the cryme:

  990

  Else we may flye; thou to a tree mayst clyme,

  And I creepe vnder ground; both from his reach:

  Therefore be rul’d to doo as I doo teach.

  The Ape, that earst did nought but chill and quake,

  Now gan some courage vnto him to take,

  995

  And was content to attempt that enterprise,

  Tickled with glorie and rash couetise.

  But first gan question, whether should assay

  Those royall ornaments to steale away?

  Marie that shall your selfe (quoth he theretoo)

  1000

  For ye be fine and nimble it to doo;

  Of all the beasts which in the forrests bee,

  Is not a fitter for this turne than yee:

  Therefore, mine owne deare brother take good hart,

  And euer thinke a Kingdome is your part.

  1005

  Loath was the Ape, though praised, to aduenter,

  Yet faintly gan into his worke to enter,

  Afraid of euerie leafe, that stir’d him by,

  And euerie stick, that vnderneath did ly;

  Vpon his tiptoes nicely he vp went,

  1010

  For making noyse, and still his eare he lent

  To euerie sound, that vnder heauen blew,

  Now went, now stept, now crept, now backward drew,

  That it good sport had been him to haue eyde:

  Yet at the last (so well he him applyde,)

  1015

  Through his fine handling, and cleanly play,

  He all those royall signes had stolne away,

  And with the Foxes helpe them borne aside,

  Into a secret corner vnespide.

  Whither whenas they came, they fell at words,

  1020

  Whether of them should be the Lord of Lords:

  For th’Ape was stryfull, and ambicious;

  And the Foxe guilefull, and most couetous,

  That neither pleased was, to haue the rayne

  Twixt them diuided into euen twaine,

  1025

  But either (algates) would be Lords alone:

  For Loue and Lordship bide no paragone.

  I am most worthie (said the Ape) sith I

  For it did put my life in ieopardie:

  Thereto I am in person, and in stature

  1030

  Most like a man, the Lord of euerie creature,

  So that it seemeth I was made to raigne,

  And borne to be a Kingly soueraigne.

  Nay (said the Foxe) Sir Ape you are astray:

  For though to steale the Diademe away