“Okay, okay. I’ll be right there,” Penelope said, as we set up the details of where we were going to meet.
“Do you trust her?” Bea said to me.
“I do. Let me handle this, guys. Y’all go home.”
I inhaled as I walked to my car. We’d dogged disaster. We had to keep it that way, so I headed to meet the leader of the line.
Penelope kept her word and came alone to the designated meeting spot, the nearby Waffle House. I was sitting inside with a cup of hot chocolate.
“Can I get you something?” I said to her when she first sat down.
“No, I want to make this as quick as possible. It’s late and you don’t need to be out here alone. What’s going on?”
“The line is in jeopardy,” I said defiantly.
“I really don’t understand. Talk to me, Hayden. What’s up?”
There was no need beating around the bush. I just wanted to get it all out and see what she was going to say.
“A lot of the girls want to quit. This has been a lot. We’ve had bloody noses, bruises, all kinds of stuff. We didn’t sign up for this, Penelope. Some are mad because they were on the pre-underground line and felt like they proved themselves and shouldn’t have to endure the brutality. Others who didn’t go through that, feel like they never let you guys think they would stand for such craziness. We’re divided and some want to squeal to the chapter advisor.”
Penelope looked at me with seriousness at that moment. She knew if someone blew the whistle she’d be held responsible. She had to fix this.
“Penelope, I know you tried to stand up against some of the other Betas, but they shot you down cold. I just don’t know if we can take it anymore.” I sipped on the hot chocolate and waited for her response.
“So who are you supposed to be?” she said smartly.
I really didn’t understand where the hostility was coming from because I came to her from the heart. I thought we were cooler than this, but she quickly let me know that in her mind I was still a pledge. How dare I tell her they needed to change or we’d walk away. But that’s what I said and I was waiting for a response.
“Okay, so you’re not gonna answer me?” she asked.
“I’m line president,” I told her as my neck happened to roll, further making the point that I could speak for everyone.
“Oh my gosh!” she said excitedly, as she got up and gave me the biggest hug. “They chose you to be the leader? Do you know how hard it is to get girls to agree on one person and they chose you already? Oh wow, this is major! They sent you here to talk to me? I’m loving it. I’m so proud of you, Hayden.”
Okay, I didn’t know where all of that was coming from. After she’d been distant, now she was being nice to me. It didn’t matter, I was here for one reason—to get her to call off the wolves.
“You just work your girls. Tell them Edythe and I got this. It’s not going to be easy, but we’ll certainly get the sisters to back down some. I’m so proud of you. This is a blessing. You’re the line president! Alright girl, keep working what you got. But I’ve got to go, we can’t be seen together.” Then Penelope got up and jetted.
I guess I had made her aware that she needed to get her girls to back off. I hoped she could change things. If she didn’t, me and my line sisters would take action. Whatever that meant. I sure hoped Penelope could fix things.
The next two nights, we didn’t have any underground activity. It was so awesome for us all to be in the library catching up on our studying. My line sisters were praising me for setting the Betas straight.
“I don’t know what you said to them,” Bea said to me as we sat together going over a psychology assignment. “But you did it.”
“She is the girl! She is the woman! She is the queen!” Trisha got up from her seat and started bowing.
“Oh see, now you are tripping. Stop,” I said, laughing.
“Well, we better get over there. We’ve got a gem ceremony tonight.”
“Yeah, I’m so excited,” Bea said.
“Me too!” I told the two of them. “I guess it’s another step. Forget the hazing, this is what the national chapter says we should go through to be in this sorority. If we listen to every word they say to us, really take in the experience, I know we’ll come out way better.”
“You all caught up in this ceremony stuff,” Bea said to me.
“Because I really want to be a Beta. I really want to understand what it’s all about. How can I use this to make a difference if I don’t have the proper training? That’s like going into the science test and thinking we’re going to get an A without studying! Uh uh! It don’t work like that, my sisters,” I said to them.
“Alright, alright. I see what you’re saying,” Trisha said.
We all went our separate ways and met up an hour later at the gem ceremony. It was the first of five sacraments we’d attend to get a deeper understanding of the beliefs and values of the organization. The event was in the same lovely theatre where we became initiates. I was overjoyed to move a step closer to my beloved Beta Gamma Pi.
Edythe was at the mic with the advisor. They started singing the Gamma hymn. It’s the song for pledges. As we walked in, Edythe said, “Tonight is the first gem ceremony. You’ll be going through a life altering experience. This gem, a ruby, represents leadership. We know that deep inside each Beta is a powerful woman ready to take the world by storm.”
Then the advisor took the mic and said, “A leader never steps back from any adversity in front of her. Leaders stand boldly. Always upholding justice. You speak for those who can’t speak for themselves and you also speak for those who depend on your strength.”
Penelope came over and directed us all up to the stage. There were different cards with quotes on them that embodied principles of leadership which we read aloud. At the end, Edythe stood with a sword and said, “With this sword, I deem you a leader of strength.”
Then we read a card that said, “And I accept the honor. I will not let Beta Gamma Pi down. I will be a leader with purpose, vision, and passion.”
Then Edythe knighted us with the sword.
The ceremony was so powerful and impactful. I’d made a pledge to lead my generation to greatness.
After, we each held a red candle symbolizing strength and sang the meaningful Gamma hymn. Then there was a prayer and we exited the ceremony. I always thought being a leader was a part of my duty, but being in this room, with this group, at this time, I felt that leadership was truly in my blood, in my soul, and in my heart.
Anyone can go about their life caring only about themselves, doing their own thing, and standing up for nothing. But a person of substance, quality, and stamina is someone who wants to make the world better through change. Feeling that, knowing that, going through that, made this gem ceremony extra special for me. I didn’t know what was next to come, but I knew I was a leader. God called me to stand for Him. Believing that and being empowered by that made me feel blessed.
8
GONE
Penelope found a way to evade her line sisters and keep our line happy at the same time. One of the requirements for becoming a Beta was passing a comprehensive test covering the history, purpose and mission of the sorority. She had given us an impromptu practice test and all sixteen of us had failed it. This was harder than any college exam I had ever taken. The three-hour exam was comprised of multiple choice, matching and fill-in-the-blank questions, and an essay section.
We received a Beta Gamma Pi manual at the beginning of the process. We were supposed to know it front to back, which was virtually impossible without adequate study time, and if we had to do this underground foolishness there was no way we could study that and finish our school work. So for the last four days, Edythe, the Chapter President, and Penelope, the Vice President and leader of the line, kept us away from their sorors who wanted desperately to distract us.
“You guys hurry up. Get inside,” Penelope said, as we got to a new location none of the Bet
as knew about. “Nobody followed y’all, did they?”
“No, nobody followed us. We checked,” I assured her.
Edythe asked, “Because they’re getting real antsy. You sure nobody followed you?”
“No, nobody was following us,” Bea confirmed.
We all sat down and pulled out the manuals to begin studying. But then Dena started rustling around, looking for something. No one could concentrate.
Dena got up and said, “Aw, I left my manual in the car.”
Before Penelope could stop her, she fled outside. Suddenly, all craziness broke loose when Big Sister Keisha Mean Machine stood in the doorway with ten other not-so-happy Betas.
“Edythe and Penelope, I need to speak to you right now,” Keisha hollered out.
We were scattered all over the room. Instinctively, we dropped our pens and books and fell in line. Second nature was in and logic was obviously out.
“Yeah, y’all better get up and show some respect,” Keisha said to us with a mean stare that scared me. “Penelope, I thought you knew where they were, girl. I’ve been calling you. You won’t answer your phone. Stupid little pledges can’t even think for themselves. We were following them, but were lagging so far back that we lost them until one of your girls came outside. Just dumb! Obviously they want a butt whipping.”
Sharon was in front of Trisha, her regular spot, and she said, “Y’all, if they touch me, I’m out of here.”
“Just hold it together,” I said. “Ain’t nobody gonna have to go nowhere.”
“Is Penelope going to handle this?” Bea said from behind me.
“We wouldn’t be hiding out in the first place if she was able to tell Keisha what part of her body to kiss and mean it,” Trisha said.
“Just stay cool, guys,” I said.
“I don’t understand the two of y’all,” Keisha said as she pulled Penelope and Edythe to her face. “Y’all supposed to want what’s best for the sorority, not stand up for these little hussies.”
“You went too far last time, Keisha,” Edythe said, surprising us all by standing up for us.
“Girl, get out of my way,” Keisha said, pushing her to the side. “Bring in the stuff, y’all.”
One of the old heads said, “Yeah, we got it right here.”
“See, pledges, we figured you guys were studying so hard that y’all were hungry. Now it’s time to eat a Beta sandwich. You jerks have a minute to get rid of these peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I don’t know how you’re going to do it, but you better make sure that everyone has some.”
“They don’t have time to do this.” Penelope snatched the bread as Keisha tried to hand it to Dena at the front of the line. “They’re studying. They have an exam to take. Or they won’t be Betas at all.”
“Whatever girl, please, that is not as important as them passing my exam. This is Alpha Chapter. We have history here that cannot be ignored. Everybody has to eat the Beta sandwich in a minute and this line is no exception. Y’all don’t even want to know what the consequences are if you don’t comply.”
“I’m allergic to peanuts,” Sharon wailed, surprising us all.
What a good idea, I thought. Three more girls on the line said they were allergic as well. Keisha looked as if she wasn’t having it.
Then Sharon started shaking and said, “No, I’m serious.”
Trisha said, “Did you hear that, Hayden? Tell them that she is allergic for real.”
I raised my hand. Sharon wasn’t a kidder. If she was allergic, Keisha needed to back off.
“What?” Keisha responded, looking like she wanted to throw the peanut butter and jelly at me.
“Sharon really is allergic to peanuts, Big Sister Keisha Mean Machine.”
“That’s a cop-out. I don’t believe you guys. Now hush up and get ready to eat this. You all do not want a beat-down. Go!” she said, as everybody except Sharon started scrambling over to the peanut butter.
There wasn’t even a knife. We had to use our fingers to put the peanut butter and jelly on the bread.
“Just don’t eat any,” I said to Sharon. “Fake it. Make it look like you are.”
“Okay, okay. I can do that. But I can’t touch the stuff,” Sharon said.
Unfortunately, Keisha and the rest of the Betas were watching every move we made. Keisha went over to Sharon with a sandwich and stuffed it in her mouth before any of us could stop her. What had she done?
“Chew it, darn it. Telling me you’re allergic. I don’t have time for that foolishness,” Keisha said, as she shoved the remaining bread into Sharon’s mouth.
Within an instant Sharon started choking. Her lips turned bright red and several bumps appeared on her face. She fell to the ground and no one else in the abandoned building moved. This was far worse than the girl who had choked. Sharon lay still. We were going to lose her.
“We’ve got to call the paramedics,” Dena shouted.
None of us had cell phones except the leader of our line. The Betas always collected our phones so we wouldn’t be disturbed while on line. Dena was right. We needed help immediately.
“Whatever, stand back,” Keisha said. “Give her a second. No one is calling the paramedics. That’s out.”
Sharon was already a light-skinned girl but now she was deathly pale. Something was severely wrong and there was no way her fifteen line sisters were going to let her die on our watch.
Without caring about the consequences, I got up from Sharon’s side and went to Penelope and said, “Give me your phone. NOW!”
Penelope hesitated for a minute. I didn’t know Trisha and Dena were behind me. None of us were playing.
“You heard her,” little Dena said, coming to my side.
“God don’t like ugly,” Audria shouted out.
I leaned over to Penelope and said, “If something happens to her I’ll testify in court. Give me the phone.”
Quickly, she reached into her pocket and handed it to me. I dialed 911 and gave them all of the information. Audria knelt down to take care of Sharon. Bea and the rest of the girls on the line started crying and praying.
“She can’t breathe. She doesn’t have air. Tell the paramedics to hurry, they’ve got to hurry,” I said to the operator. “It might take them too long to get here. We need to get her into the car and get her to the hospital now.”
Without worrying about what any Beta thought, we tended to our girl. I couldn’t believe this was happening. Was not being a paper line so important that intelligent young women would threaten another woman’s life?
When we got to the car, Penelope said, “Just stay on the phone with the operator. When you get to the emergency room, please call Edythe and let us know that Sharon’s okay. Edythe’s number is stored in my phone, but I can’t go with you, I need to stay here.”
Keisha came out of the door and said, “Y’all are letting them go to the hospital? This line is over.”
“Well, if you wouldn’t have come here, then this would have never started,” Edythe turned to her and said.
I got in the driver’s seat and Trisha sat beside me. In the back were Audria, Bea and Dena holding Sharon the best they could. I had driven fast before, but never as if I were trying to win the Indy 500 or something. Trisha looked out to my left and right when we got to stoplights. When she told me it was clear, I kept on going. We couldn’t lose Sharon.
When I pulled up to the emergency door, Trisha ran to get help. Audria had Sharon’s head in her lap and she was praying. All of us were glad she had such a strong connection with God. He had to help us.
“It’s all my fault,” I said, with my head on the steering wheel. “Sharon wanted to quit. She wanted to get out. I told her it was going to be okay. I thought we had it settled. She wouldn’t be going through this if I hadn’t talked her out of it.”
Bea stroked the back of my head and said, “Like you can blame yourself. This is Keisha’s fault. She came over and stuffed a peanut butter sandwich in someone’s face, when they said
they were allergic to it. I mean, even if she didn’t believe Sharon, how could she take that chance? They need to lock her tail up in jail somewhere.”
It seemed like it was taking Trisha forever to come back with help. Sharon’s body had no movement. So we opened the door and carried Sharon in.
Bea screamed, “Somebody has to see her now! Help her now! We called on the phone, we spoke with the operator. HELP!”
“Okay, okay. We’re here,” one of the nurses said, as a doctor followed right behind her.
“She’s critical! Let’s take her back,” the doctor said after checking her pupils.
Her face was so distorted, she clearly was allergic to peanuts in the worst way. All of us stayed around in the waiting room and held hands, praying. I had wanted to be a Beta more than anything these last few months, but if it meant losing Sharon, I would trade that dream for her being okay. Penelope’s phone rang. I hadn’t even realized that it was still in my hand.
“Hello,” I answered.
“Hey, this is Edythe. How’s Sharon? Please tell us that she is okay?”
“We don’t know anything right now. She’s in with the doctor,” I said half-heartedly, not wanting to talk to any of them.
“Well look, we called Cynthia Berry, our advisor, and she is going to meet all of you at the hospital. If you don’t want the line to drop, please be smart about what you tell her,” Edythe said.
“Edythe, are you kidding me? Sharon is fighting for her life, and you’re telling me to watch what I say to the advisor? I’m sorry, I can’t even talk to you right now.” I hung up the phone.
Tears started streaming down my face. I really needed to know how Sharon was doing. She had to be alright.
“Okay, what did Edythe want?” Bea said, breaking through my tears.
“Our advisor is going to be here in a second and Edythe wanted me to lie to her about what happened with Sharon.”
“Wait!” Bea said. “Edythe has a point. We’ll lose everything we worked so hard for if we tell the truth. Why don’t we think about this?”