I love you, Courtney. You’re my better half.
My lungs screamed at me, burning and bursting. I reached out through the hazy water and hooked an arm around Emily’s waist. Her head jerked and then fell back onto my shoulder, just like it had upon arriving on Misfit Island, and my life played in reverse as Emily pulled us—with her mind—away from here.
Think about the end. Think about nothing but the end of the world. The silence.
That special part of my mind I’d recently learned to access burst to life, making the world underwater come alive, electricity buzzing through my fingers, coursing up my arms, shooting out through every extremity.
Think about the end. Think about nothing but the end of the world. The silence.
As I did this, as I succeeded in pulling myself toward death, I felt the weight of the excess timeline sitting on my chest like a boulder, I felt the floor of the ocean rumble below, the Earth’s core cracking beneath it. It was really happening. A whole world was being destroyed in order for another world to survive.
The moment of Holly jumping into my arms, whispering that she loved me, played over and over until I felt her with me, felt the importance of that moment and how it changed both of us. My body sank to the bottom of the ocean, while my heart remained above sea level with a girl I’d loved for so long I couldn’t remember what it felt like before.
Mission accomplished.
CHAPTER THIRTY
Some part of my mind registered that I was no longer underwater. I felt Emily’s weight pressed against my side. The only thought running through my head was the pills.
I’m still alive and I need those pills taped to my back before the world explodes.
The pressure of my nose being pinched distracted me momentarily. Air was forced into my lungs and then suddenly the world became clear around me, my eyes flying open, taking in the older woman leaning over me. She jolted back, startled by my awakening.
What happened? Did we do it or not?
I rolled onto my side and coughed up what felt like a gallon of ocean water. My teeth chattered. It wasn’t cold, but the cool breeze coupled with my soaking-wet clothing had me freezing.
“Courtney,” I managed to say. But she wasn’t here.
Sirens sounded around me, growing louder and closer. I looked around and took in the crowd of people circled in this outdoor location.
Where am I? When am I?
“Jackson.” Emily was stirring beside me, coughing and saying my name.
My muscles were too heavy and full of ocean water to roll over the other way.
“Where did they get wet?” a voice said.
“The pond, I guess,” said the woman who until just a moment ago had had her mouth intimately placed over mine.
More water ejected itself from my lungs and finally I had clarity enough to focus on my surroundings.
Central Park. I’m in Central freakin’ Park.
I sat up so abruptly, I nearly butted heads with a paramedic. Emily had also pulled herself into a sitting position beside me.
“Son, can you tell us what happened? Have you been in the pond?”
I turned to Emily, whose panicked face seemed to mimic mine. “What happened? Why are we here and not…?”
“I don’t know,” she said.
“What day is it?” I asked the paramedic.
“Actually, I need you to answer that question from me.”
I felt around on my back, smacking the plastic bag Marshall had taped to me. “I need my pills, they’re on my back.”
Both paramedics looked at me like I was insane but the woman who had been near me when I first woke up lifted my shirt and ripped the bag from it. I let out a yell of pain and then stared in shock at the clear plastic envelope she placed in my lap.
There were no pills. Only a piece of paper with handwriting I recognized immediately. Before I could open it, one person I hadn’t expected to see ever again came running toward me.
Dad.
“Oh my God,” Emily muttered.
“He’s alive,” I said, my heart quickening all over again. I didn’t know what to feel. What had happened?
Dad froze about twenty feet away, his eyes zooming in on Emily, but then just as quickly he composed himself and tucked his shock away, or maybe he realized it wasn’t Courtney. But that meant he didn’t know who Emily was.
I pulled myself to my feet, despite the paramedics’ protests for me to lie back down. “Dad, I’m okay. It was just one of those fainting spells I’m always having.”
He held it together perfectly. “Of course, let’s get you home.”
“Excuse me, sir,” the paramedic said in protest. “He wasn’t breathing when they called us, he should be taken to a hospital. The girl, too … is she yours as well?”
Emily jumped up beside me, both of us drenched. “Yes, we’re related. I just … I tried to go after him when he fainted and then I remembered…”
“That she couldn’t swim,” I finished for her.
I don’t know how Dad did it, but he managed to maneuver us away from the paramedics without further questions.
“Are you sure you’re okay to walk?” he whispered at me, taking two or three glances at Emily.
“Yeah, I’m okay.”
He walked briskly in front of us, his cell phone out and pressed to his ear. “Stewart, we’ve got a five-seven-two-four situation on the corner of…”
His voice faded away as I tuned him out and grabbed Emily’s sleeve, halting her. “Where’s Courtney? Why isn’t she here? What happened? We did it wrong, didn’t we?”
Emily’s eyes were huge and quickly filled with tears. “I don’t know. I felt it happen … I thought I did.”
“Me, too.”
Dad stopped and turned to face us. “Want to tell me who this kid is, Jackson?”
“Emily,” I said. “She’s sort of my clone.”
My own confusion took precedence over Dad’s and I snatched the phone from his hand and looked for the information I needed.
March 15, 2009, 5:22 P.M.
“Holy shit.” I showed the phone to Emily. “This isn’t happening…”
Dad set his hands on my shoulders, lowering his eyes to mine. “Jackson, what happened to you?”
Instead of focusing on his question, my mind turned over a different question—what wouldn’t happen…?
If I didn’t show up in the same place at the same time, something very important might not happen. My heart pounded in my ears, my hands shaking as I broke free from Dad’s grip. Maybe it was stupid to even think about this when I had no clue how or why I landed here with only one of the two people I’d jumped into that whirlpool with, but I think my mind and body just wanted to grasp something real and familiar, to ground myself into this time.
March 15, 2009. Again.
I dropped the plastic bag onto the ground and then stripped off my heavy wet coat and sweatshirt, tossing it down beside the bag.
“I’ll be right back!” I took off before he could reply, ignoring his shouting my name.
The adrenaline fueled the movement of my legs as I ran toward Ninety-second Street. I had to see her, had to see if she showed up. My life had become this exhausting merry-go-round, constantly bringing me full circle to this exact same spot.
I reached the Ninety-second Street Y in only a few minutes and I leaned against a tree, hunched over catching my breath and clutching my side, trying to rub away the stabbing pain. It probably wasn’t the best idea to go for a half-mile sprint just minutes after nearly drowning.
The sun was beginning to set, but I could still see clearly down the block, just like I’d been able to that first time. My breath caught in my throat, my heart nearly stopping as I watched Holly Flynn walk toward the building I stood near, a book open in one hand and a pink smoothie in the other.
What now? Do I bump into her? Introduce myself? Head into the counselor training, leaving Dad with Emily and no explanation for my abrupt departure?
I held my b
reath, my heart racing as she moved closer.
Go over there! Do something, you idiot.
Just as I placed one foot forward to move toward Holly, her eyes lifted to meet mine and she stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, at least thirty feet still separating us. Her jaw dropped open. The smoothie slipped through her fingers and fell to the ground, splattering all over.
“Oh my God,” she muttered.
Okay, this is different.
I tentatively walked a few steps closer as people moved around us. “Do you … do you know who I am?” She just continued to stare, the frozen strawberry smoothie forming a puddle at her feet. “Holly?”
She shook her head and seemed to pull herself together, stepping sideways and moving onto the grass beside the sidewalk. “I didn’t think I’d see you again.”
“Again?”
Where the hell am I? Is this heaven? Have I been reincarnated?
“Oh!” she said, suddenly remembering something. I watched her blond ponytail swing forward as she bent over to retrieve something out of her bag. “I still have your note.”
“My note?”
“The one you left me.” She stood again, holding a tiny slip of white paper between her fingers. She stepped closer, closing the gap between us.
Slowly, I reached forward and took the note from her hand.
Holly,
Please don’t give up on me.
Love, Jackson
I lifted my eyes back to her, staring in disbelief. “You’re … you’re…”
She gave me a tiny yet shy smile. “Adam says you call me 007 Holly, but I wasn’t sure exactly why…?”
My hands landed on her cheeks before I could think about whether or not this Holly would mind. I had to make sure she was real. “I’m not supposed to be here. This world isn’t supposed to exist anymore.”
Her eyes dropped down and then slowly moved upward as if taking in my appearance for the first time. “Why are you all wet? Does your dad know you’re here?”
“Like here in this world or here with you?”
And that was when my adrenaline rush ran out. My legs wobbled beneath me and I felt Holly struggle to help me sit down in the grass. She leaned close, keeping one hand on my shoulder as she removed her phone and dialed. “He’s with me, he’s okay.”
“Who is that?” I asked warily. “Who are you talking to?”
“Your dad.” She glanced around the street before finally sighing with relief as a black car pulled up front.
I mustered the strength to stand and reached for Holly’s hand, squeezing it tight. “Please come with me. I don’t know what happened and I don’t want you to go away.”
Her eyes locked with mine, her chest brushing against mine as tears sprang to her eyes. “That’s funny because I was thinking the same thing. I don’t want you to go away, Jackson. Are you going to leave again?”
Inside my head, it was so much quieter than it had been since my first full jump when I created World B. The silence was beautiful, but replaying my time with this Holly had come a little slower and was finally just hitting me. “Wait … you love me. You told me you loved me.”
She dropped her eyes to the ground, drawing in a deep breath before nodding. “And then I was gone, right? You haven’t seen me since?”
“No.”
“So it’s been like, what? A year and half?” I asked, and she nodded. I leaned in until my forehead touched hers and I could clearly see the tears trickling down her cheeks. “Holly?”
“What?” she said, sniffling.
“Can I kiss you?”
She surprised me by laughing, her hands shaking as they reached up to touch my face. “Yeah, you can kiss me.”
I covered her hands with mine and kissed her quickly while Dad held the door to the car open. “I’m sorry I left you.”
I slid into the car beside Emily, who immediately dropped the plastic envelope with the handwritten letter into my lap. I began to read it as Holly and Dad joined us and the car jolted into motion.
Dear Jackson,
I know you’re probably very confused and after finding out what’s happened, you may be very angry with me. Please know that I had no choice and if presented with the options, you would have never done what needed to be done.
If you’re reading this, then you’ve landed in the place I know you like to call World B. I’m so sorry to tell you this but the destruction to World A was irreversible. This was always the place you’d end up. This was always going to be your home for good but there are things that needed to be done to make that happen. I know how you must feel, leaving that other world behind, but I can assure you, every individual you loved is here with you as they should be and much better off than they’d be under the viral outbreak caused by the convergence.
Of course as you’ve also probably noticed, Courtney isn’t with you and that’s because the course of her life has always ended at the same place and there is no way to reverse that. I know it probably seems as though you’ve been played by Chief Marshall but this was a plan we developed long ago, before you were born. If time travel got so out of hand in the future that it began to affect the past, we had the responsibility of moving life to a world without time travel. Yes, a world without time travel. The future of World B will include the Tempus gene but the evolution of time travelers will never happen here because of the force that you created from the timestorm—a feat that never could have been done if you’d known the truth. The sacrifice and the gravity of what you’d hoped to accomplish is the element that brought your powers to that level. In order for the destruction of World A to be successful, you, Courtney, and Emily needed to believe that you were putting every last drop of your being into that time jump. Unlike the others, both you and Emily use emotions like anger, fear, love, and loyalty to unleash that insurmountable power. The timestorm created a blanket or a sort of force field over World B to prevent human access to the part of the mind used for time travel.
I have one more matter to discuss with you in this letter. I want you to take a moment and close your eyes, count to five and pay attention to what you feel. Don’t try to talk Dr. Melvin out of testing you to verify this himself but you can feel it, can’t you? Or maybe it’s more of an absence of feeling. The electricity you once felt, the expansion of your mind that once allowed you to time-travel has quieted. You have done so much and you’ve worked long and hard toward these noble goals and the brain can only handle so much. The power is gone. The part of your mind that copies everything is gone, too, and as you’ve seen what that power has done to Emily, consider this a gift. You’re free, Jackson. I imagine the skills that you’ve learned training under Kevin’s watch will all still be around. You’re exceptional even without the superpowers. I wouldn’t be surprised if you choose to remain an agent for the Tempest Division.
Do not allow yourself to be overcome with guilt because you’re alive. You were so brave, Jackson. You’re exactly where you deserve to be. Remember to live life for not only yourself but for me and your sister, too. All we want is for you to be happy, so that’s what you need to do.
I love you always.
Your mother in almost every sense of the word,
Eileen
My hands shook, tears dripping from my eyes down the end of my nose. I turned to Emily and caught her wiping away her own tears. “Marshall tricked us,” I said.
“Yes.”
“They’re gone … World A is gone.” I took her hand and she leaned against me, her cheek resting on my arm.
I felt a warmer, softer hand wrap around my other wrist. I turned my head to face Holly. “What did Adam tell you? Do you know—”
“That you’re a time traveler?” Holly finished, surprising me.
“He’s not anymore,” Emily said, her head snapping up as the realization hit her. “You’re not anymore. Eileen was right. I can’t feel you.”
“Is your power gone, too?”
She hesitated then nodded. “I think so.”
Her gaze fell to her lap. “Will I stay here with you, then? In 2009?”
I looked to Dad and then back to Emily. I felt myself smiling. “Yeah, you’re staying with me, my fingerprint clone.”
“You’re not leaving then?” Holly asked. “You don’t have to return to some important other place or time?”
I released Emily’s hand and turned to face Holly again. “I’m not leaving, Holly. Not ever again. I’m stuck here, just like you.”
She closed her eyes briefly, sighing with relief. I leaned in and kissed her forehead. “So, you’ve really been waiting around for me all this time? Because of my note? I wasn’t even sure I’d be back here.”
“I guess I wasn’t sure either, I just hoped you would.” She looked down at our fingers twined together. “I haven’t been sitting in my room crying for a year and a half, if that’s what you’re asking.”
I laughed, and the sound of it, the feeling, startled me. “I’d never ever think you’d cry over me for that long. A year, maybe…”
The car had stopped in front of the building so we all tumbled out and held our conversations to a minimum until we reached the safety of our apartment. I knew Dad had so many questions for me and I could imagine that Dr. Melvin was probably already on his way, but I had to check Eileen’s work and see if her letter was accurate. I led Holly into my bedroom and shut the door behind me. I nudged her toward the end of the bed and pressed on her shoulders until she sat down, then I knelt in front of her, resting my hands on her thighs.
“I need you to answer a few questions for me and not ask for details if it doesn’t make sense.” I exhaled, looking down at my hands before raising my eyes to hers again. “I’m actually hoping you have no idea what I’m talking about.”
Holly smiled a little. “Jackson, just ask me.”
“You don’t have a … boyfriend, do you?”
She burst out laughing. “That’s what you wanted to ask me? Are we in middle school?”
I gave her a sad smile in return. “So, no?”
“Besides my mostly imaginary time-traveling boyfriend … no,” she teased.
A wave of dizziness and exhaustion hit me. I rose to my feet and fell onto the bed beside Holly, before lying all the way back, staring up at the ceiling fan. “Have you ever heard of Eyewall or know anyone named Agent Carter?”