Page 26 of Nexus


  Why did she feel so torn, like there were two people inside her warring over who should be the victor of the spoils?

  Tori did love Dante. She couldn’t deny that, and as proof, she had just given him the one thing she could never take back and no one else could ever have again. Her body belonged to him, but who owned her heart? Because a part of her loved him, too.

  It had been three days since Kerrigan’s gift of the Light had returned; only it had been a slow process. Each day, she felt it grow stronger inside her. It was still not enough for anyone to notice whom she didn’t want to, but undeniably there all the same. At first she’d had to concentrate to see it for herself, but as the days passed, it had become easier and easier to summon it at will. Going to her sanctuary took only a flicker of thought now. Because the gift had once been so potent in her life, relearning the ability to wield it was sort of like learning to ride a bike again—she never truly forgot how.

  Having sworn to never keep secrets again, she had told Dominic about her gift coming back. But only him—at first. When she broke the news, he had seemed hesitant to believe her, like acknowledging it was possible after she had mourned the loss for over twenty-one years would somehow get her hopes up when it had all only been a trick of her mind. Maybe he thought she had wanted it back so much that like a habitual liar who actually started to believe their own lies, she too had believed in something that just wasn’t true. Dominic, always the supportive and doting husband, had never uttered a word of doubt out loud, but Kerrigan had seen it in his eyes. So, she had proved herself with her eyes as well.

  Once he had seen the Light glowing in her baby blues, his entire expression, even his body’s slumped posture, had changed. Elated; he had definitely been elated, to say the least. Their joint excitement had only waned when they realized the enormity of what the Light’s return had to mean for Tori. It had hit them like a wrecking ball to the well-constructed house of impenetrable steel they had built to safeguard the only person that meant more to either of them than each other.

  Something huge was coming. Something that was too big for Tori and Dante to battle alone.

  That was when Dominic decided it would be a good idea to bring in reinforcements to make sure Kerrigan would be in top form should all Hell break loose—probably literally. Sworn to secrecy—only because they didn’t want to spook Tori or Dante—Drew had once again put on his Guardian trainer hat, and they were in full-blown preparation mode. They had used every spare moment of their children’s absence to practice calling on her gift. This was easier than they had anticipated given that Tori and Dante had been spending so much time together outside the house.

  Although she, Drew, and Dominic had made full use of the training room once Dante and Tori had vacated it for an outing, Kerrigan still felt the need to push harder. It had become more than an obsession to train as hard as she could to be sure she was in top form when her daughter needed her the most. What better help was there than a mother’s will to protect her child? So she snuck down to the garden, just hoping to test her ability on a few of the flower bulbs that hadn’t yet reached their full potential.

  The moon was bright and pregnant in the night sky, closer to the Earth than Kerrigan had ever seen it, like she could reach out and touch it with the tips of her fingers. Stars were scattered across the midnight blue blanket of the heavens, and without the cover of clouds to impede their show, their twinkling looked like a well-choreographed number in celebration of the Light’s return.

  Just as Kerrigan’s bare feet touched the plush carpet of grass at the bottom of the steps, she heard Tori’s faint giggle. A giggle that sounded quite flirtatious. Scanning the garden, she found Tori and Dante nestled together on the ground just off to the side of the water fountain with the statue. Using the cover of shadow, Kerrigan crept closer, not wanting to intrude, but also curious as to how cozy the two had become.

  With another flirtatious giggle, Tori pushed Dante until he was lying flat on his back, and then she straddled him. Okay, that was new. Kerrigan had never seen Tori behave like that, but then again, she had pretty much been secluded from boys of her own age since the day they had found out she had inherited Kerrigan’s gift.

  Tori pushed her hands under Dante’s shirt, and although Kerrigan couldn’t see them in plain sight, there was no mistaking the glow that came from underneath the thin cotton material. Dante’s head fell back and he moaned at her touch while biting his bottom lip. Then he flattened his palms on Tori’s bare thighs, his Light illuminating them as well as he daringly pushed them under her skirt. With a gasp, Tori grabbed his wrists and stopped him from going any farther.

  Her forced laugh was breathy and dripping with lust as she shook her head. “We can’t. Someone’s going to see us.”

  “You started it,” Dante replied in a deep voice that was thick with his British accent. “I thought I made it quite clear that if you touch me, you’re giving me permission to touch you back? Or have you forgotten all about that little game simply because I’ve let my guard down on occasion?”

  Tori gazed down at him with a sultry smile Kerrigan had definitely never seen her try on before, and that was when Kerrigan truly realized what she was seeing. She was no longer the little girl who liked to play dress-up with her mommy’s clothes and pretend to be an adult; Tori was all grown up. That smile was exactly like the one Kerrigan gave Dominic—particularly when she was in the mood for a closer connection of the sexual kind.

  Tori Milena Cruz-Grayson was definitely no longer a virgin.

  And when Dominic found out . . . well, maybe that was the reason Kerrigan got her gift back—to add to Drew and Tori’s protective wall around Dante when Dominic charged him. Because it was going to take a whole lot more than the Guardian of Mankind and the boy’s father to keep Dominic Grayson from tearing into the man who had the balls to deflower his baby girl.

  When Dante flipped Tori over and nestled himself between her legs, he kissed her passionately, solidifying Kerrigan’s assumption. It was like watching that heart-swelling moment at the end of a chick flick where the girl finally gets the guy. Although it sort of bordered on the edge of becoming a skin flick when Tori hitched her leg over Dante’s thigh and then his hand started to wander under her skirt again.

  Time for Kerrigan to make her presence known before things became too uncomfortable for her to watch.

  “Ahem,” she said, stepping from the shadows.

  Tori’s eyes popped open and she shoved Dante off her to bolt into a sitting position, all while fussing furiously with her disheveled clothes, as Dante jumped to his feet.

  Busted. It was sort of cute to watch their panicky behavior. Childlike, even though there was nothing innocent in what was just about to happen between the two had Kerrigan not interrupted.

  “Hey, Mom,” Tori said with a nervous edge to her voice. She scrambled to stand with Dante’s help. After looking up at him and then back to the ground in embarrassment, Tori said, “Um, we were just leaving.”

  She tugged on Dante’s hand, refusing to look up as she kept her head turned down to watch her feet shuffle along instead. When they made to walk past Kerrigan, she put her hand on Tori’s shoulder.

  “Run along, Dante. I think it’s time my daughter and I have a little talk . . . in private,” Kerrigan said, keeping her eyes on Tori.

  Like the gallant prince that Kerrigan had always thought him to be, Dante looked down at Tori, silently asking her what she wanted him to do.

  “It’s okay,” Tori told him with a forced smile. When he quirked a secretive brow, she gave him a reassuring smile and nodded. “I’ll be all right. Really. I won’t be long, ’kay?”

  Kerrigan watched as Dante slid his hand up and down Tori’s arm before giving her hand a squeeze like he just couldn’t bear not touching her. With a lingering gaze that spoke more than any words could, he finally relented.

  The way those two looked and moved around each other was like nothing Kerrigan had ever seen. It was
like they were reading each other’s minds, anticipating each other’s needs, like they were soul mates, even though their marks contradicted that theory. Kerrigan thought she and Dominic did the same things, but their connection was nothing compared to the thick hum of energy that passed between Tori and Dante. It was powerful, so much more powerful than anything she had ever experienced, which was saying a lot.

  Once Dante had disappeared into the house, Kerrigan turned to Tori. “What was that all about?”

  “I don’t know.” Tori shrugged. “He’s just a little protective of me, is all.”

  “Well, I’m glad to hear it, but that’s not what I was talking about, and you know it. You two were just about to get it on right here in the garden . . . where everyone can see you . . . in broad,” she looked up at the night sky, “moonlight, or whatever. What were you thinking?”

  Tori rolled her eyes and let her hands fall to her sides. “Jeez, can we not do this? Because if you’re trying to start an argument, I just don’t have the energy.”

  Kerrigan sighed. Why did it always have to be like this between them?

  “I’m not trying to start an argument with you, Victoria. I’m trying to be your mother. And after what I just saw between the two of you, I realize I might be a little late with the talk, but I think we need to have it nonetheless. After all, there are things that are special about you.”

  “You have no idea,” she mumbled.

  “What did you just say?”

  “Nothing. The talk, right? There really isn’t anything more you can tell me about it. I already know the particulars: insert tab A into slot B, yada, yada, yada.”

  “Tori . . .” Kerrigan said with a tone that was both motherly and nonconfrontational.

  Tori stopped her rant, but crossed her arms over her chest defiantly. “What?”

  “There’s more to sex than tab A and slot B, and the fact that you would even use that analogy to describe what should be a beautiful act tells me you definitely had a lot more to learn before you ever took your relationship with Dante to that level.”

  “Don’t be so dramatic, Mom. I know more than you give me credit for.”

  “Really? Do you have feelings for him? Feelings that can stand alone without the physicality of it all?”

  Tori shrugged. “Pretty much so, yeah.”

  “And what about Dante? Does he reciprocate those feelings?”

  A smile tugged at the corner of Tori’s mouth and her eyes glowed with her Light. “He says he loves me.”

  “I see. Well, have you told him that you love him as well?”

  “Not exactly.”

  “Why not?”

  Tori relaxed her defensive posture, almost relieved to have someone to talk to about the situation. “Because saying it out loud makes it . . . I don’t know. It makes it permanent, you know? Like really permanent. Once it’s out there, I can’t take it back.”

  Finally, they were talking like two human beings—like an honest to God mother and daughter should be able to talk.

  “And that scares you?” Kerrigan asked, not wanting to lose the momentum of the conversation by pointing out the fact that they actually were having a sensible conversation.

  “Of course it does.”

  “Why is that?”

  “Because it just does, Mom. I don’t know how, but I’ve got this gut instinct telling me that if I say it, I’ll be binding myself and everything I am to him and only him—not just for a lifetime, but for an eternity.”

  “And that’s not what you want? If you loved him, it wouldn’t be a problem. So . . . you don’t love him.”

  Tori shook her head. “I didn’t say that. You’re putting words in my mouth.”

  “No, you said he told you he loves you, but you can’t say the same in return.”

  “I said I haven’t, not that I can’t. I’m not ready to make that kind of a commitment. I mean, I’m twenty-one, and I’ve only just met him for crying out loud.”

  “You knew him long enough to give him your virginity though, didn’t you?”

  Tori gaped. “Mom! That is so none of your business!”

  Kerrigan held up her hands up in surrender. “Okay, okay. I won’t go there, but it is a valid point—one you probably shouldn’t bring up to your dad.”

  Tori smiled at the thought of her overprotective father. “No worries there. I kind of like Dante’s face the way it is, and I’m pretty sure he’s quite attached to it as well.”

  “Yeah? And what about his other body parts? Huh?” Kerrigan asked, nudging Tori with her shoulder in an attempt to goad her into dishing the girl talk.

  “Gross, Mom. That’s wrong on so many levels.” Tori shook out the shiver that ran down her spine. “I’m not discussing my sex life or any of Dante’s body parts either, for that matter.”

  Kerrigan laughed. “I’m kidding, Tor.” She took her daughter’s hand and practically dragged her over to one of the benches to sit. Once they were both seated, she turned to Tori, intent on making the most of the chance to make her daughter see reason.

  “Look, all I’m saying is that there obviously isn’t any doubt in Dante’s mind about his feelings for you. You can’t play house with him, Tori—going through all the motions and leading him on—not until you know for sure how you feel about him in return. You’re not being fair to him, and you’re not being fair to yourself either. And until you’re able to say the words out loud, those feelings aren’t real—not to him, at least.” Kerrigan sighed. “I’m sure Dante has probably told you that you don’t need to say it back, but I’m here to tell you, oh daughter of mine, after putting all that he is out on the line like that, he most definitely needs to hear it. He’s probably hanging on your every breath, praying each syllable that crosses your lips will somehow morph into those three little words.”

  Tori was quiet for a moment, seeming to let the words sink in. “But what if, by doing so, I’m making a mistake?”

  “How would telling Dante you love him be a mistake if you really feel that way?”

  Tori huffed in exasperation and looked up at the sky before turning back to Kerrigan. “What if he’s not the one? I mean, our marks aren’t identical. Soul mates’ marks are supposed to be identical, right? So, what if by tethering myself to him for eternity—and that’s what I’d be doing; I can feel it to my bones that that’s what I’d be doing—but what if by doing so, I’m making the wrong choice?”

  Kerrigan nodded in understanding, but she had a different theory. “It’s true that a Guardian’s soul mate normally shares a twin mark, but yours and Dante’s are twins on a whole other level. I’ve seen a picture of his. It’s the other half that makes your mark whole, Tori. And that makes sense to me because you two are gifted beyond any other Guardian.” She paused as an idea hit her. “There is one way to know for sure. You just have to be willing to do it.”

  Tori’s eyes brightened at the prospect of an answer to her confusion. “Right now my thoughts are so convoluted about all this that I’ll take any help I can get to figure it out. How? Just tell me what it is, and I’ll do it.”

  “Have you taken him into your sanctuary?”

  Confusion, mixed with what Kerrigan recognized as Tori’s attempt to carefully disguise fear she hadn’t meant to be seen, morphed her expression. “No. Why would I do that?”

  “There was a time when I was desperate to help your dad, and I didn’t have a clue as to how to do it. And then I remembered how Drew took me into his sanctuary when we first met and told me that nothing is kept hidden from a Guardian within their sanctuary. He could see everything about me and actually found out the truth of my pregnancy with you. So, after a long time of trying to figure out how to do it only for it to happen by accident, I took Dominic into my sanctuary. Once we were there, I knew exactly what I needed to do to save him from fading away. Maybe that will work for you, too. Maybe if you take Dante into your sanctuary, you’ll see whether or not he’s the right choice. Couldn’t hurt to try, right?”
br />   Tori paled, her words slow, statements of realization formed as questions. “Nothing is hidden from a Guardian in their sanctuary? They can see everything? Everything?”

  “As far as I know. I mean, you should probably ask Dante’s permission first because it would sort of be an invasion of his privacy if you didn’t. You wouldn’t want him to think you were being deceitful, but yeah, I think it could work.”

  Tori stared off, making the connection. “Drew took you into his sanctuary, and he’s been training Dante since the day he was born, so chances are . . . Dante already knows what it means to take someone else into his, right?”

  “Drew is nothing if not thorough. I’d say since Dante is his son, he’d leave no stone unturned with his training, especially since he’s been charged as the Guardian of the Guardian. He’d make sure he was ready for anything that might come his way.”

  Tori swore under her breath as she clenched her fists, her whole body shaking.

  “Tori, are you okay?” Kerrigan asked, concerned.

  Tori gave her a humorless laugh, her thoughts obviously somewhere else entirely. “Oh, I’m just peachy keen.”

  “Are you sure? Because you’re shaking.”

  “Must just be the chill in the air.”

  Kerrigan thought it felt quite comfortable outside, warm even.

  Tori stood. “Thanks for the talk, Mom. You have no idea just how informative it’s been. If you’ll excuse me,” she said, standing, “I think I should go see Dante about a little matter of making that trip. Wouldn’t want to be deceitful or anything because he would never dream of doing something like that to me.”

  Kerrigan couldn’t help but notice how Tori’s words dripped with sarcasm, but before she could press her further on what had upset her so much, Tori was marching into the house, a woman on a mission.

  To say Tori was furious would be an understatement.

  Dante had tricked her. He knew full well what would happen when he took her into his sanctuary, and he had done it without uttering so much as a word to her about it. No, she had no proof, but only an idiot would believe the son of Andrew Dickens didn’t know what fruits could be gained by taking another Guardian into his sanctuary.