‘I guess there’s only one way to find out. I, for one, hope that I’m not only older but considerably wiser.’ He reached out and took her hand. ‘As I told you before, there hasn’t been a day in all this time that I haven’t thought of you. Every night I’ve gone to sleep thinking of you, wondering where you are. I haven’t forgotten a single thing about our time together. I just bitterly regret that, through my own foolishness, it ended. When I received your email all those years ago, I shouldn’t have called Tyler. I shouldn’t have listened to his side of the story. That was stupid of me. I should have got on a plane right away and headed straight back to change your mind.’
‘My mind didn’t need changing. I still loved you. Adored you. Perhaps I should have done the same when I got your email. But I was so devastated, I wasn’t thinking straight.’
‘Me neither.’ Simon’s handsome face darkened. ‘I could kill him for doing this to us. We both let Tyler dictate the course of our lives. I’d like to think we’ve learned from that, at least.’
She nodded her agreement, still unable to grasp the extent of her husband’s manipulation of them both. It was cruel and unforgivable.
‘I’m so glad I came back, Kirsten. I wish I’d followed my instinct years ago instead of fighting it. Now I have a chance of putting it right. Until I did that, I was going to live for ever with “what if?”’ He smiled at her sadly. ‘Then I saw you tonight and nothing had changed. I was filled with such overwhelming feelings of desire, and love, and the need to take care of you, I don’t want to let you go again.’ He tilted her chin to make her look at him. ‘I want nothing more than to make you happy.’
Her engagement ring and matching diamond-studded Tiffany wedding band sparkled in the overhead lights. She slid them both off and let them sit on the coffee table in front of them.
She was near to tears. ‘I feel as if I’ve wasted so many of the good years of my life that I do want to throw caution to the wind and get on with living.’
‘Me too.’
‘Can I really trust you, Simon Conway?’ she asked. ‘I don’t want my heart broken all over again.’
‘Of course you can.’
‘Do you swear you still love me as much as you did?’
‘I do.’
His eyes met hers and the sincerity in their depths made her breath catch. ‘Then take me to bed.’
Chapter Thirty-eight
I glance up at my parents’ house. The lights are still on upstairs. That will be Dad, restless and wakeful until I’m home. Some things don’t change. He was just the same when I was a teenager out on a date. He’d never go to bed until I was safely home.
The street my parents live in hasn’t changed all that much since I was a child either. They bought their house when they were first married and have lived here ever since. It has been my rock throughout my life. They had uPVC windows put in a few years ago and the kitchen was upgraded shortly afterwards. There’s a fancy water feature in the garden, but the front door is still the same colour it’s always been. My parents aren’t big on change.
I look up at the room that used to be mine as a girl, and picture Mia sleeping soundly there. My mum and dad put a brave face on it, but I know they sometimes find it hard for us to be back with them. There’s no break from Mia’s exuberance and occasionally I catch a glimpse of them both looking so tired and, I hate to say this, a bit old. I feel as if I’ve brought the responsibility of my failed relationship home with me. But now they can’t simply pat my hand and tell me there are plenty more fish in the sea. Now there’s Mia to consider. And the three adults in the household all scuttle round to work to her rhythm.
I hoped my new job would be my ticket out of here. Mia and I should have our own place. My parents should be enjoying the latter end of their working life in peace and comfort by themselves. Plus they’re the sort of people who save up for years so that they can buy a new washing machine or something. They don’t even have credit cards, so I know the amount of debt that I have is as terrifying for them as it is for me. I so wanted to relieve them of that worry.
Josh and I are sitting together in his car, parked up across the end of the drive, just talking. He’s easy company and I’m glad he persuaded me to accept a lift with him rather than face the scrum of the Fossil Oil coaches.
We’re bathed in the dim glow of the streetlamps and I’m comfortable and warm in the car. It’s very plush and I realise that Fossil must be quite generous with their car allowance. I can hardly bring myself to leave and go out into the cold.
I’m exhausted after the party. What a night.
‘If an angel flies over, that frown will stay,’ he notes.
‘I’m thinking about tomorrow,’ I admit to Josh. He’s turned towards me in the driver’s seat and the darkness picks out the line of his jaw, his cheekbones, making him look even more handsome. His eyes are dark with concern. ‘With some trepidation, I’m wondering what will happen when Tyler sobers up.’
‘Perhaps he’ll see the funny side of things.’
‘Is there one?’ I sigh. ‘Even if he doesn’t sack me outright, can I still keep working for a man who I have absolutely no respect for?’
‘Tyler’s all bluster. A capable woman like you can keep him in his place.’
‘His wife thinks he’s having an affair with me. How do I handle that?’
Josh grimaces as he says, ‘I’m not sure if you know this yet, but it’s fairly common knowledge that Tyler is in a relationship with the chairman’s wife.’
‘Melissa Harvey?’
He nods.
‘You’re kidding me!’
‘Karen is obviously slipping with her gossip.’
‘Oh my God.’ I can’t get my head round this one. Why would someone like Melissa Harvey – someone who seems to have it all – get involved with a sleazebag like Tyler Benson? ‘I assume Lance doesn’t know.’
‘I’m guessing not.’
As I’m still trying to process this, the lights in the hall flicker on and off. I laugh out loud.
‘That’s my dad,’ I say to Josh. ‘Obviously he thinks it’s time for me to say goodnight.’
He strokes a finger across my cheek. ‘That’s a shame.’
‘Yes.’
‘I’ve enjoyed this evening, Louise. Can we do it again sometime?’
‘I don’t know. Could we really work together and be romantically involved?’
He raises an eyebrow. ‘I think we should try.’
I laugh at that too. ‘After tomorrow it might not be an issue.’
‘Tomorrow is another day. Let’s see what it brings.’
He tilts my chin and his warm lips gently brush mine. The sensation sends tingles all through me.
At that moment, my phone rings. We both roll our eyes but nevertheless I reach in my pocket for it and pull it out. I smile when I see the caller display.
He frowns. ‘Tyler?’
‘Worse.’ I turn it to face him. ‘Dad.’ Punching to answer, I say, ‘Won’t be long, Dad.’
‘I was starting to get a bit worried, Lou-Lou,’ my father says at the other end of the line.
‘Don’t. I’m fine.’ I hang up and tuck my phone away. If Dad rings again I’m not answering a second time. ‘And they wonder why I want my own place again.’
‘They’re only concerned for you,’ Josh says.
This time I kiss him properly and just hope Dad isn’t watching out of the window. Then, reluctantly, I go to get out of the car.
‘Thanks, Josh.’
‘I’ll see you at the office tomorrow.’
‘I look forward to it,’ I say.
‘Louise,’ he calls out as I’m about to shut the car door. ‘We could make this work.’
‘Maybe we could,’ I agree. Then I skip down the path and catch my dear old dad peering through the letterbox.
Chapter Thirty-nine
Tyler looked for an escape route, but he was too high up to jump from the window. On top of all the humiliatio
ns he’d suffered tonight, he didn’t want to add breaking a leg or even his neck to them. Plus there was the small matter of him being stark bollock naked.
‘Help!’ he shouted again, but the staff just stared at him. Was no one going to rush to his aid? Were all the Fossil staff totally lacking in compassion?
It looked as if the answer might be a resounding yes.
In a vain attempt to cover himself, Tyler tried to pull down one of the heavy brocade curtains, but to no avail. He was almost swinging on them but they weren’t budging. Whoever had put these up had made sure they were going nowhere.
Now the smell of smoke was getting stronger and the fire alarm was still wailing away.
Where had Kirsten got to? Wasn’t she worried about him? He could only hope she’d calmed down now after mistakenly believing she’d seen him with Louise. What was she thinking? Did she really think he was that careless?
Tyler sighed wearily as he listened to the whirling machinations of his own contorted brain. Why did he have to do this? And on a regular basis? Why put himself through all this anxiety? Wasn’t his working life stressful enough without making his love life complicated too?
In spite of it all, he did love Kirsten. Truly. She was all a man could want. It was just that he needed something more. Something that would provide a rush of excitement. What did that say about him? Perhaps he was getting too old for all this philandering. After all, there’s no lech quite as pathetic as an old lech. You only had to look at Lance Harvey to see that. It could well be that the day had come when he should think about settling down and embracing the hitherto unfamiliar concept of marital fidelity with open arms. He knew that was what Kirsten wanted. She deserved it too.
Now Simon Conway was back on the scene, and Tyler was sure she’d always carried a torch for him, no matter how much she might protest otherwise. Well, Conway would have to stand on the sidelines for this dance. There was no way he was going to worm his way back into Kirsten’s affections. Oh, no. Not on Tyler Benson’s watch.
Tyler breathed heavily. This little scare could well have provided a timely reminder of which side his connubial bread was buttered.
Chapter Forty
Together, Melissa and Martin manhandled Lance into the house. They struggled to get him up the stairs and tipped him on to the bed. Lance let out an inelegant ‘Ouff’. One of his shoes fell off.
‘Thank you, Martin.’ Melissa straightened her hair. ‘I can manage now.’
He looked as if he didn’t want to leave her.
‘Really, I’ll be fine.’
‘If you like, I could stay and make you some tea, Mrs Harvey?’
She thought about dismissing him for the night – no one should have to witness Lance in this state – but then Martin had already seen everything Lance had got to offer. He’d vomited in the back of the Bentley before now, had wet himself in his sleep. Martin was under no illusions. And she felt lonely, so very desperately lonely. It was comforting to have a friendly face here, someone who was always on her side.
‘That would be lovely,’ she said to him. ‘You know where everything is?’
He nodded.
As soon as he left the room, she set about undressing Lance. He stirred as she tugged off his jacket.
‘I love you, you know?’ he slurred. ‘I’ve always loved you.’
Lance being belligerent was bad enough, but Lance being maudlin was always a complete catastrophe.
‘Of course you do, honey.’ The words came automatically from her mouth now, bypassing her brain. She might have believed that once, a very long time ago.
‘You’re the only one who still loves me.’
She wrestled with the buttons on his shirt. ‘Lots of people love you, angel.’
‘No they don’t!’ He sounded tearful now. ‘No one loves me. My boys don’t love me. They never come to see me.’
‘The boys are busy, darling. You know that. It’s not that they don’t love you.’ Perhaps if Lance hadn’t always been permanently pissed when they did come to stay, they wouldn’t be in such a tearing hurry to get away again. They hardly knew Lance anyway. While their father had chased his corporate dream the boys had been sentenced to life in an expensive, loveless boarding school rather than a warm family home. Even in the holidays, which Melissa clung on to as precious time with her sons, he’d always been too busy to see them.
It was something she regretted bitterly. She should have left Lance to pursue his career and stayed in one place to give the boys the life they deserved. At the time she’d reasoned it away by convincing herself that she’d been protecting them from his drinking. Perhaps, in her own way, she had. But the boys weren’t fools. They knew the score with their father. The only miracle was that she still had a good relationship with them, and she was thankful every day for that. Although they could never understand why she stayed with Lance. Frankly, neither could she any more.
‘The company doesn’t love me,’ her husband continued. ‘My entire working life I’ve slaved my guts out for them. Running round Europe at the drop of a beret.’ He looked at her wistfully, his eyes cloudy with tears. ‘You were right, Melissa. I’m being sidelined. Shunted into the buffers at the last-chance railway station. At sixty-six I’m over the hill. Pushed out of the way to make room for younger, brighter, hungrier men.’
The brightest and hungriest of them being Tyler Benson. Even now a pain nipped at her heart at the thought of his name. She could tell Lance that she’d been having an affair with his right-hand man, but what purpose would that serve? If she came clean, confessed all, it would only lower her to Tyler’s level. She had to handle this with dignity. It was over, and the sooner she accepted that, the better. Tyler had used her, got what he wanted, and now he didn’t need her any more. Well, more fool her. That was the price you had to pay for falling in love with someone unsuitable, and forbidden to boot.
Melissa went to undo Lance’s trousers, but stilled her hands. He was fast asleep again, spreadeagled on the bed. He snored loudly, producing percolating bubbles of spit from the corner of his mouth which burst on the out-breath, considerately making room for the next watery eruption. She was used to it. Of course she was. But this time, something about the way Lance looked made her stomach turn. Was this what she had to look forward to for the rest of her life?
She thought back to a time when, after a night out, they would have tumbled together into the bed, craving each other, so passionate, so in love. It seemed like a very long time ago.
Wearily, she bent to pick up his fallen shoe and tugged the other one off his foot at the same time. Then she eased the throw at the bottom of the bed over him. Lance wouldn’t know whether he was dressed or undressed, covered or not. Collecting his shirt and jacket, she put them over the dumb valet that stood in the corner. Perhaps she was every bit as dumb as it was.
Going downstairs, she found Martin in the kitchen. He’d taken off his suit jacket and was pouring two cups of tea.
He’d only switched on the lights that illuminated the work surface, so the kitchen was subtly lit. Just as she liked it. Martin turned when he heard her step on the stairs.
‘I hope you don’t mind, Mrs Harvey,’ he said, nodding at his jacket. ‘I took the liberty.’
‘Of course not.’ She slipped on to a stool at the breakfast bar and let Martin serve her the tea. ‘I hate stools,’ she said. ‘What fool invented them?’
‘You can’t beat a good chair,’ Martin agreed and that made her laugh, though she didn’t know why.
‘Do sit down, Martin. It’s too late to be hovering. You must be exhausted. I know I am.’
He took the stool opposite her and they sat in the dim light, nursing their cups.
‘I hope the tea’s as you like it.’
‘It’s perfect,’ she said and then took a moment to notice its soothing warmth. ‘Just perfect.’
‘Is Mr Harvey all right?’ Martin eventually asked.
She shrugged. ‘For now.’
‘What will you do?’
She knew what he meant. He didn’t have to spell it out for her. Martin knew as well as she did that this couldn’t go on. ‘I don’t know.’
‘I could take you somewhere,’ he said, concentrating on his cup. ‘Anywhere you wanted to go.’
Her mouth was dry. ‘You’d do that for me?’
He nodded. ‘I don’t like to see you unhappy, Mrs Harvey.’
‘But I am, Martin,’ she admitted. ‘Desperately.’
‘He doesn’t deserve you.’
She forced a smile. ‘I think you’re probably right.’
‘I didn’t mean to speak out of turn.’ Martin stood up. ‘I should go, Mrs Harvey.’
Melissa sighed. She couldn’t do this any longer. Whatever happened, she couldn’t go to Washington DC with Lance. ‘Will you wait for me?’ she asked. ‘I won’t be very long.’
‘Shall I go out to the car?’
‘No, no. Sit here for a moment, Martin. I’d like you to be here.’
Something inside her had clicked. With blinding clarity, she knew she’d reached the end of the road with Lance. Melissa knew that if she didn’t leave him now, then she never would.
Chapter Forty-one
Simon moved above her. Kirsten clung to the contours of his lean back and moulded her body to his. It was a long time since she’d known such all-encompassing ecstasy. Everything else that had happened tonight was obliterated as they moved together in a harmony of love.
Sex with Tyler had always been a marathon of athletics. He wasn’t content unless they’d tried a dozen different acrobatic positions, and it had gone on for hours. It had become a performance, not a mutually shared pleasure. It felt as if he didn’t want her, so much as his own ego-boosting gratification. She didn’t have the stamina or the stomach for that now, so in recent months she’d tried to avoid it as much as possible.
Yet, with Simon, making love was just as she remembered. He’d loved her with strength and tenderness and without the need to resort to several chapters of the Kama Sutra. It was as refreshing as it was exciting. Making love to him had been like coming home, and she wanted more of it.