“Jah,” Rebecca said, resisting the urge to tackle Levi and demand an explanation.
She watched from the door as they trudged away side by side. She wished she were a fly on the wall of that bright red barn.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Levi walked next to Rebecca’s fater with his head lowered and his hands clasped behind his back, much like a prisoner going to his execution. Or perhaps his reprieve. He couldn’t be sure how Rebecca’s fater would react.
Who was he kidding? Levi knew exactly how he would react. From what he knew already, Rebecca’s fater was not an understanding man.
They entered the barn and Rebecca’s fater closed the door behind them, shutting out the bright light. They stood three feet from two milk cans, but her fater didn’t sit down and didn’t ask Levi to sit, either. Through the dimness, he scrutinized Levi with a frown on his face. With one look at that stern expression, Levi’s throat constricted and he found it impossible to speak. He hadn’t expected to be terrified out of his mind.
“What is the serious matter you wish to discuss?” her fater said.
Levi cleared his throat and wished he were sitting. It wouldn’t be good to pass out right now. “I have come to ask for forgiveness.”
“Forgiveness?”
“Jah, for the injury to Rebecca’s head.”
Her fater narrowed his eyes. “What happened?”
“We were riding in my car and got into a small accident.”
Rebecca’s fater took a step forward to study Levi more closely. “Your car? A good Amish boy does not own a car.”
Levi took a deep breath. With the next words out of his mouth, he might destroy his own future and seal his doom. But it had to be done, come what may. “My name is Levi Cooper,” he said. “My dat was Isaac Stutzman, and he died when I was seven years old. My mamm married an Englischer, who adopted me and gave me his name. I have been raised outside of the community ever since.”
Rebecca’s fater slowly folded his arms across his chest. “You are not Amish?”
“No.”
Her fater’s face darkened, and he shoved his finger into Levi’s chest. “What do you want with my Rebecca?” Then, louder, “What do you want with my daughter?”
“It’s not what you think.”
“You think my daughter is an easy target for an Englisch boy?” He pointed to the door and yelled, “Get out and never come back!”
Levi lifted his hands in surrender. “Will you listen to what I have to say?”
“You mock us by coming on our farm in these Amish clothes, making us believe you are something you are not. How far have you pulled Rebecca down?”
“I do not mock anyone,” Levi said, unable to keep the tears from sliding down his face. “And I would never harm Rebecca. I love her.”
The lines in her fater’s face deepened. “What have you done?”
Levi dared to take a step forward. “I want to explain everything to you. I mean no harm.” He motioned to the two milk cans. “Can we sit?”
Rebecca’s fater didn’t budge. He stood with his fists clenched at his sides, a pillar of stone frowning at Levi.
Levi opted to sit—hopefully a less-threatening position than towering over Rebecca’s dat. “I want to be baptized,” he said.
“Is this a joke?” her fater said, scowling.
“My life changed when I met Rebecca, and now she is the only thing that matters to me. I want to join the church and marry her.”
Her fater flinched. “Do not even suggest that.”
“I’m more serious about this than I have ever been about anything in my life. I want to be baptized.”
Her fater folded his arms. “You pretended to be Amish. Why should I believe anything you say?”
“Because I’m telling you the truth now. If she were my daughter, I would want to know. I met Rebecca in May, and we have been seeing each other ever since.”
“So she has been deceiving me also.”
“It is her rumschpringe. I didn’t want you to know. I thought you would put a stop to it.”
Her fater glared at Levi. “I would have.”
“I convinced her that it would be okay during rumschpringe.”
“Rumschpringe is no excuse for wickedness.”
“Rebecca has done nothing to shame herself. She won’t let me kiss her or hold hands in public.”
Rebecca’s fater rubbed his chin, and the frown seemed to soften a bit.
“She always behaves like the virtuous woman she is,” Levi said. “Believe me, she has done nothing wrong.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I want to marry your daughter, but things must be right between us first. How can I make all things right?”
Rebecca’s fater folded his arms and looked away. “I do not for one minute believe your sincerity.”
“Try me.”
He pinned Levi with an icy gaze. “You will not work on the farm or see Rebecca until you are baptized. Then we will see if you truly mean what you say.”
Even though he was expecting it, Levi felt as if his heart might crumble into a million pieces. How could he bear the thought of not seeing Rebecca? “I will agree to that,” Levi said, keeping his voice steady. “But I have two requests for you. I ask that you not tell Rebecca that I plan on being baptized. I want it to be a surprise.”
Her fater snorted in bitter laughter. “A surprise? I will be surprised if it comes to pass.”
“Will you keep it a secret?”
“Why the secrecy?”
“I want to have all my plans in place before I tell her. It must be the perfect time.”
“As you wish. It won’t amount to anything anyway,” said her fater.
Levi’s heart beat harder. “There is one more thing. Rebecca wants to go skiing. More than anything else in the world before she is baptized. And she wants me to take her.”
“Nae,” said her fater. “I have already said no.”
Levi stood and held out his hands. “You must understand. To her, it is almost a matter of life and death.”
“Why?”
He had said too much already. Rebecca would not want her fater to know about the list. “I am a good skier. I can keep her safe. If I’m not allowed, I promise she’ll find a way to go by herself. And she could get badly hurt.”
Her fater shook his head. “She will not go if I forbid it.”
Levi took a breath and chose his words carefully. “You are gone from home every week. Rebecca is a gute girl, obedient and strong. But in this one thing, she will defy you. Are you willing to take that risk with her life?”
Anger flashed in Rebecca’s fater’s eyes. “She would not dare.”
Levi’s eyes stung with tears of frustration. “Mr. Miller, I made Rebecca a solemn promise that I would take her skiing, and I intend to keep it. Please don’t ask me to break one promise to keep another.”
Rebecca’s fater had no immediate argument. He sat down on one of the milk cans and rubbed his forehead with the tips of his fingers.
He was silent for nearly five minutes.
Levi felt sick to his stomach. He couldn’t do anything but pray.
“She wants to go skiing,” her fater said.
Not an argument or an accusation. Levi saw a ray of hope. “Jah, it is the last thing she wants to do before she is baptized, and she says she will not let Jacob Glick take her.”
“Jacob Glick is thirty years old and unbaptized. I will not let Jacob Glick take her either.”
Levi dared a half smile. “Just for one day. I will watch out for her and bring her safely back. And I will keep my promise about not seeing her otherwise.”
Rebecca’s fater grunted. “When she sets her mind to something, she cannot be talked out of it. It would be just like her to break her neck in stubbornness.” He shook his head. “I will find someone else to take her.”
Levi stood and squared his shoulders. “I will take her. I would appreciate your approval.”
Rebecca’s fater lifte
d his chin and folded his arms across his chest. His eyes bored into Levi’s skull as if hoping to extract the secrets there. They stared at each other in breathless suspense until her fater turned away. “See that she is safe,” he said.
Levi grabbed her fater’s hand and shook it vigorously even though her fater didn’t return his enthusiasm. “Denki. I will never forget your kindness,” he said, elated that he ranked slightly higher than Jacob Glick in Rebecca’s fater’s opinion.
It was a start.
Chapter Twenty-Six
After practically slamming the front door on Fater and Levi, Rebecca swept and mopped with unusual speed. If she didn’t work herself to death, the curiosity would kill her.
She had just hung the mop in the closet when she heard another knock. What? Had her house suddenly become more popular than the bus station?
She must be a very wicked girl for God to punish her so.
With hat in hand, Marvin Yutzy stood staring at her with a mixture of determination and stubbornness on his face. His eyes widened when he saw the bandage. “What happened to your head?”
Again her hand instinctively went to the cut. “I had an accident,” she said, hoping to put an end to the questions with her tone of voice. She certainly wasn’t going to bare her soul to Marvin Yutzy.
Marvin cleared his throat and hung that determined look on his face again. “Is your dat home?” he said. “I came to speak with him.”
Rebecca took a deep breath. Had Levi and Marvin conspired to humiliate her today? “He is in the barn,” she said.
“I will go find him.”
“Nae, Marvin, he is…someone else is talking to him. You had best wait your turn.”
“My turn?”
“Jah.”
Marvin pointed to the bench on the porch. “I will wait here.”
Reluctant as she was, Rebecca remembered her manners. “Nae, cum reu. Come in and sit. It is too chilly for sitting outside.”
Marvin wasted no time in planting himself on the sofa and inviting Rebecca to sit next to him. She couldn’t very well avoid his invitation without being rude, so she sat down on the end of the sofa farthest from him.
Ever since the day he discovered Levi and Rebecca in the middle of the water fight, Marvin had redoubled his efforts with Rebecca. Besides continuing to pick her up on Tuesdays from Mrs. Johnson’s house, he personally invited her to every singing and gathering and often came by on a Sunday evening to sit with the family.
“I saw your buggy wheel is fixed,” Marvin said. “I am glad you did not have to buy a new one. They are expensive. We bought a new buggy three years ago, and my dat hopes it is the last one we have. I think as long as you take good care of your buggy, it can last for several years, unless it gets hit in an accident.”
Marvin gave Rebecca a tutorial on the best way to clean buggy seats and windows. She listened intently simply because there was nothing else for her to do. She couldn’t very well leave Marvin in the living room talking to himself while she refilled the propane lamps and gathered the eggs.
Max and Danny both wandered into the room at some point but left after a few minutes of listening to Marvin talk about the color of the milk from the cows at the dairy. No doubt they went to find a more exciting pastime, like staring at the ceiling.
A half hour must have passed before, through the window, Rebecca saw Levi and Fater emerge from the barn and march resolutely toward the house.
Rebecca jumped to her feet, happy that she had been able to stay awake through Marvin’s droning. “Here comes Fater now.”
Fater stomped into the house, followed by Levi. Levi gave her a weak smile.
“Fater, Marvin has come to see you.”
Fater practically tripped over his feet in an effort to shake Marvin’s hand. “Marvin Yutzy,” he said with exaggerated friendliness.
Rebecca glanced at Levi, who seemed to bear Marvin’s presence with composure. He watched them but didn’t change expressions.
Marvin shook hands with Fater while keeping his eyes glued to Levi. “I wish to speak with you, Amos,” he said. “In private.”
Fater forced a jovial laugh and took Marvin by the elbow. “Well, then,” he said, “step into my office.” He opened the door and led Marvin to the barn. Good thing the cows had already been milked. No one else would see the inside of that barn this morning.
Rebecca glanced at Levi. He stared out the window and pursed his lips. For some reason she wanted to give him comfort—for what, she couldn’t say.
Levi glanced at her. “The vultures are circling. And your fater would much rather have him for a son-in-law.”
“My fater will not pick my husband.”
“But your future husband must have your fater’s approval. Marvin has already won your fater to his side.”
“Fater does not wish for me to marry. I am needed at home.”
“With such a pretty daughter, I think he’s resigned himself to the inevitable.”
Rebecca folded her arms. “You two had a lot to say to each other.”
To her surprise, he reached out and gently drew her in for an embrace. She had absolutely no desire to pull away. “Oh, Rebecca, I had to do it.”
She felt a tear splash on her cheek. She looked up. He was crying. “Do what?”
“My mom said I needed to, and she was right. I told your fater everything.”
“Everything?”
He squeezed her tighter. “Not what we talked about last night. I told him about how you hurt your head. I told him about my Amish parents and my Englisch stepfather. He was very angry. We shouldn’t have kept that from him, kid. I rationalized that it was better to deceive him because you needed the help. But he is your fater. He deserves to know.”
Rebecca’s eyes stung with tears that she refused to shed. She knew what was coming.
“He won’t allow me to set foot on this farm,” Levi said, “until…”
“Until what?”
“Until pigs fly, I guess.”
She pulled away from his warm embrace and turned her back on him. “Why did you come? I told you not to come.”
“I have to make right what I can.”
“Did you tell him about the list?”
He shook his head. “That is between you and Dottie Mae.”
“What about the skiing?”
His voice was mild but held undercurrents of profound pain. “Is that all I am to you? A means to an end? A skiing trip?”
Rebecca couldn’t look into his eyes. “What does it matter?”
He sighed, sat down, and buried his face in his hands. “He gave me permission to take you skiing.”
“He did?”
“I told him I’d take you whether he agreed or not.”
The news that she had permission to go skiing should have made her ecstatic. But all she saw in the skiing trip was an end to her relationship with Levi.
It is better this way.
I have to be strong.
“Isn’t it great?” he said, his voice cracking. “You get to go skiing.”
She sat down next to him. “Great,” she replied flatly.
They sat together, the silence cramming into Rebecca’s ears.
“When will I see you again?” she said.
“Could I call you every day?”
“Jah. But can I see you ever?”
“When we go skiing.”
“But when else?” she said.
He studied her face. “Does it matter?”
She took a deep breath to clear the grief filling up her chest. “Jah,” she said. “It matters.”
He let the air out of his lungs as if he had been holding it for a long time. “Denki,” he said. He took her hand then released it just as suddenly. “But I want to gain your fater’s approval.”
“It is my rumschpringe. Fater may be able to keep you off this farm, but he cannot keep me on it.”
“Just the thought of being away from you until the snows fall is enough to make me mise
rable,” he said. “But more than anything, I want to do this the right way. To honor your fater and your traditions. It’s the only way.”
“The only way what? Levi, you are making me frustrated.”
He chuckled. “I promise, when I sort this all out, you’ll be the first to know. Just trust me, okay?”
“No, I won’t. I can look after myself.”
He stood up. She followed him to the door. He reached for her then pulled back before he made contact. “This is killing me, kid. But I’ll call every night. Will you answer the phone if you’re not too frustrated?”
“Jah.”
He took a long look at her, as if memorizing her face. “Let’s hope the snows come soon,” he said.
She could have no such wish. Falling snow meant the end of her perfect summer.
Before she said another word, he was gone. She watched through the window until his long strides took him from her view. Could he have walked a little slower?
Not until after she mixed the bread dough did Fater and Marvin appear in the kitchen demanding Rebecca’s attention. Fater looked no less pleased with himself than Marvin did.
“Marvin wants to come help you on the farm, Becky,” Fater said, as if it were the best, most original idea to ever cross his mind. “And I have given him my permission.”
Marvin grinned and fiddled with the brim of his hat. “I would like to come on Wednesdays after work at the dairy.”
Wednesdays. How convenient.
Rebecca’s throat tightened. “I am grateful for your help.”
“Since your fater cannot be here, you must put me to work doing anything you need,” Marvin said. “I want to lighten your burden.”
Why did Marvin’s kindness make Rebecca want to pull out all her hair? She thought of Levi with his old car and faded blue jeans. An Englischer, plain and simple. Nothing would change that.
Marvin, on the other hand, would make the perfect Amish husband: hardworking, loyal, faithful, predictable.
Rebecca suddenly saw the long years of her life laid out before her. Excusing herself as best she could, she hurried out of the room as it began to spin.
Chapter Twenty-Seven