“I live next door and we work together. It’s not like I was far away.”
Duke shook his head. “When you looked at me at lunch today and I saw all that emotion on your face, but none of the warmth you usually give me, it freaked me out. You don’t have to be in another state for you to be out of my reach.”
He stepped closer, pulling her to his body as the sultry sound of FKA twigs’s “Two Weeks” wafted through the air.
She swayed, just slightly, but he responded, wrapping his arms around her as they danced, and he fell that last bit into love with her when she rested her cheek on his chest like she was meant to fit right there.
“I missed you too,” she said quietly as the song ended and he needed to get back to the grill.
Emotions in his throat, he was grateful to have something to do with his hands so he didn’t leap on her and proclaim how he felt.
“I have a really nice bottle of white wine. I’ll run home to grab it.” She blushed as she rushed out and he let her, hoping she was feeling as connected and intensely as he was instead of panicking about a bad choice in letting him in her front door earlier that night.
Just that morning she’d been mad at him. No. Not mad. Hurt. Disappointed. And now? Now that he’d come to her and apologized so genuinely, after hearing what drove him to confront her? Now she was all mixed up because her usual kick him to the curb button was refusing to work.
Carmella headed for the kitchen, grabbing the bottle of wine she’d tucked away in her pantry. It wasn’t chilled, though, and she felt like a doofus.
Her belly still fluttered even with some time and space between them, and Carmella had to pause at her front door to get herself together again. He was a neighbor. A guy she dated and had sex with. A boss—which still made her nervous.
As long as she remembered their differences as well as the things that made them alike, she’d be fine. Because there was no call in getting more than superficially involved with Duke.
From what she could tell, he liked women, a lot of them. He dated around but never exclusively. She had no reason to believe he was with her either. And no call to demand it.
Even if she wanted it. Even if she maybe, in the smallest part of herself, thought maybe she was different. They were different. Which was the sort of thing that got a woman kicked in the feelings and she needed to remind herself of that.
Virgie was a woman with a foolish heart and it had rendered her into a hot, hot mess. It made Carmella cringe to imagine ever having her own child see her the way she routinely saw her mother.
Carmella gave herself a once-over in the mirror hanging near the front door. She had that look. The woman in the mirror smiled, sensual. That woman was one who just had a slow dance with a hot man on a summer night. Her skin was still a little flushed.
He’d said he missed her.
And when he said it, a warm wave of pleasure had slid over her. Duke made her want to sigh wistfully. His compliments were for Carmella. Or at least they felt like they were for her and not a general pickup line.
He spoke like he knew her. Even if he didn’t know half of what she had packed into the baggage she carried around. It was like he looked at her and saw to her truest self and he didn’t want to back off. Or take advantage. He just accepted it.
Even though he’d just had to apologize to her, she trusted him. Even as she knew he’d do something stupid again soon enough.
Then again, she’d trusted Clifton and look where that got her. Divorced at twenty-two and the years since then filled with all manner of people oozing into her life to try to use her connection to him in some way. Usually bill collectors, but she’d dealt with the police several times as well as Clifton himself, who managed to find her whenever he needed something.
She shook her head and then gave her hair a quick brush before pulling it back with a clip. This would be doable as long as it stayed casual. Fun. That’s what this thing with Duke was and as long as she never forgot that her heart would remain unbroken.
And as a result, they could still be friends after the sex stuff waned. People seemed to be able to do it well enough and she liked him. They were adults, damn it.
Pep talk delivered, Carmella locked up and headed back to Duke’s, feeling better by the time she found him out on the deck, his fairy lights on, some citronella candles burning to keep the mosquitoes at bay.
“Wow. This looks so pretty.”
“Thank you. I needed to make sure the surroundings matched my guest.” He took the wine off to chill and before too long they were eating a fantastic dinner and she allowed herself to enjoy it.
“This is so good and so fresh. The corn just makes it.”
“I had never eaten salmon until I ended up in Seattle after leaving the army.” Duke settled back in his chair. “Asa took me to a salmon bake. Have you been to one?”
“When I was a kid, every summer we’d drive out to Kalaloch to camp at the beach.” This was such a good memory. “The first full day we were there, we did a big one.” She would laugh and play with her cousins. Her aunt and uncle always happy to be able to take her away from her mom’s influence when they could. Her biggest responsibility was not getting sand in the watermelon her aunt had sliced up.
Duke grinned. “Exactly. It was a big one at the beach and I tried it and instantly loved it. Sometimes we get together with a big group of friends to fish in Alaska. They pack it in dry ice and send it back here. That’s what this is, but Asa and I weren’t able to go this year since we had to stick close with all the construction of the new showroom and stuff.”
“Still, pretty good friends to share their haul with you.”
He nodded. “They are. I’m going to have to invest in some of those outdoor heater things so we can keep on hanging out after work even when it gets cold.”
“Except rain. I should probably warn you now that I am not one of those Seattleites who loves to be out and about in a downpour.”
“The overhang here will keep us dry. I move the table closer to the house when it’s raining. I have an umbrella for the table, but it’s not good for heavy rain. Plus, I don’t want you unhappy.”
He really meant that. Or made a convincing act of it. It brought the flutter back to her belly.
“I won’t complain about having a nice dinner made for me.”
“That’s what I like to hear. What are you doing this weekend?”
He poured the wine, and after she snuck a piece of her salmon to Ginger, they cleared the table, and since he’d cooked, she volunteered to clean up.
And for whatever reason he found it hot to watch her tidy up so why not?
Once they’d finished, they ended up in his living room, snuggled on his couch watching a movie.
His hand was up her shirt and he was explaining just what it was he planned to do with her, when his doorbell started ringing as someone pounded on the door.
Carmella jumped, startled, nearly falling off the couch. Laughing and cursing all at the same time, Duke caught her, sat her upright, and got to his feet.
“I’m going to ignore that.”
As she was ready to have sex with the man, it wasn’t as if she wanted to argue. But his friends were persistent and kept at it until it was clear he didn’t have the option.
Carmella couldn’t stop laughing, even though she doubted there’d be any sexytimes that night. “They’re not going away.”
“I’m going to kill someone,” he muttered, heading to the door, opening it hard.
“What took you so long?” Carmella heard Mick say. “We have beer and wings.” He walked into the living room, startled into stillness when he caught sight of Carmella on the couch.
“As you can see, I’m busy,” Duke said as he came in with three more people. “Carm and I are watching a movie. We had dinner. Carmella, don’t eat those or they’ll stay forever!”
Carmella shrugged as she dug into one of the wings. “They’re already here.” If she made a big deal of it, it woul
d only highlight their relationship. She’d grown up around guys like these. They were good-hearted and all, but they’d tease forever if they smelled blood in the water.
“See? She’s cool with it.” Mick sat next to her on the couch and Ginger poked her head around the corner, one ear flopped back as she caught sight of Mick and trotted over. “Hey, gorgeous. Come see me.”
Pretty soon the room was full of big men spoiling her dog with love and pets. Duke was annoyed, but he’d given in.
By ten, though, they’d started playing video games and were still drinking beer so she figured it was best to head home. She needed to go to sleep and the last several nights had been hard enough.
“I should go home,” she said to Duke quietly.
He tightened his arm around her shoulders. “What? No. Stay here. Stay the night. I’ll make them leave.”
She didn’t spend the night with lovers. She had her own bed. And her own house and that’s where she slept. She already explained this to him—sort of—before.
Carmella shook her head. “They’re too drunk.” She snorted a laugh. “I’ll see you tomorrow. At work. Thanks for dinner.”
Duke glowered at the men in his house but sighed.
“Fine, at least let me walk you home.”
At her front door he paused. “So you didn’t answer me earlier. What are you doing this weekend?”
She made the choice to give him a little more of her life. “I have to drop stuff at my mom’s in the morning but I’ll be done by nine. Why?”
“It’s supposed to be gorgeous so a bunch of us are going out for a bike ride around the peninsula. Come along.” He cocked his head, brushing the pad of his thumb over her bottom lip. “Summer’s coming to a close. Not a lot of weekends left to get out for nice long rides left. I want to spend them with you.”
She didn’t quite know what to say. He touched her in a deep place that was so desolate, so lonely, that she found it hard not to respond. Not to need more of it.
“I’d like that.”
He smiled, stepping close enough to bridge the gap between them. “Good. I’m sorry about my friends bursting in on us.”
“Duke, it’s part of who you are. Who they are. It comes with you. I know that. I need to get some sleep anyway. Thanks for dinner.”
“I’m glad we worked this through.” He kissed her then. Right on her doorstep. Over at his place she heard them oooooh and aaaaah so she knew his friends were watching.
Every one of her cells came to life. This was a public declaration, yes. But for her too. He knew that as he nipped her bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth.
Duke flipped them off and broke the kiss. “They’re assholes. Just because they don’t have women, they have to cockblock me.” He pressed his lips to her ear. “But I bet you’re wet right now, knowing they saw me with my mouth and hands on you.”
A full body shiver went through her. “You’re a cruel, cruel man.”
His laugh was a caress. “I can’t be the only one feeling this way. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He gave Ginger a last scritch behind the ear and stepped back, waiting for her to get inside before he went back home.
CHAPTER
Thirteen
Good morning, Carmella.” Duke loped into her office and put a package on her desk. “Brought you a little something.”
Presents? She tried to remain unhurried as she made her way over to the desk. “I was just about to make a pot of coffee in here. But if you can’t wait, Asa skulked out of the break room not too long ago with a mug.”
“He totally skulks. He denies it. Says he prowls. Prowls? Asshole.” The entire time he spoke, he grinned.
“Sometimes he stalks. Usually if PJ is around.” Then the very darkly handsome man kept his focus on his girlfriend. It was so hot to see that interplay between them, and while being with a man like Asa was way beyond Carmella’s skill level, the two clicked perfectly. “Totally sexy.”
Duke’s grin turned into a glower and he kissed her. Kissed. Her. Right there in her office! It was lightning quick, but yes, the crazy man had kissed her at work.
“We talked about this.” Carmella stepped around her desk, cutting off his access as she pulled the package toward her.
He raised one shoulder. “We did. But that doesn’t mean I agree with anything you said. It’s not a secret that we’re together and I like that just fine. You should open that.”
She gave him a severe look. One just for him and his lashes swept down as he closed his eyes briefly.
“It’s my present. I’ll open it when I’m ready,” she teased.
He nearly made her faint after the smolder he sent her way. “I’m racing tonight. Come out to the track and then back home with me. We need to take up where we left off a million years ago.”
She needed to change the subject before he talked her into doing god knew what right there in the office, so she pulled away the tissue paper and gasped when she pulled out a bag of whole bean Kona coffee. Her favorite, and a treat she allowed herself only a few times a year because it was so expensive. “I can’t take this!”
He thought this was hilarious, getting even closer, squeezing behind her desk with her, blocking her in.
“Back up,” she said, panic and delight warring inside her.
He shook his head. “Nope. See, you make this sound when you drink the coffee at my house. I like that sound. I’ve got a vested interest in hearing it more. Ergo, I thought to bring you a bag so that happens.”
“This is like thirty bucks a pound!”
“That particular bag is forty-eight dollars. It’s my money. I like to see you get all flushed with delight like you are right now. I won’t say no if you want to offer me some, naturally.”
“And you can see me from your office when I make it,” she murmured. Man, he must have been a handful as a kid.
His grin widened. “I did think of that, yes. But I’m rarely in my office. I’ll have to be sure to get in there more often so I can watch you.”
“Or here’s something, you can just go about your day and stop trying to cop a feel at work.”
“Where’s the fun in that?” He kissed her forehead and ducked away.
“Thank you,” she said, turning quickly to prevent him from coming in for another kiss. She headed over to make a pot of coffee, sighing happily when she opened the bag and the scent of the beans spilled out.
He’d even remembered she had a little grinder at work because she loved the ritual of grinding the beans as part of making coffee. That he noticed those details was so unexpectedly charming. Another aspect to his sexiness. He paid attention.
“You were about to say yes to coming out to watch me race tonight.”
She loved cars and bikes and racing. But since she and Duke had been dating, that bevy of women friends at the track, several of them former … what? Flames? Sex partners? Just what did you call all this complicated stuff? In any case, it made her crazy. Which made her crazy in and of itself. She wasn’t that person! So, then she had to pretend it didn’t bother her and that was tiring.
But the thing that had her most unsure about going that night was that there were raggedy edges of that crowd at the track that felt a lot like the losers her mother had living with them over the time Carmella grew up.
Wild boys never grew up. They may be hot as hell and pretty decent in bed, but the ones like her ex left a mess for other people—usually women—to clean up. Being around that again wore on her. Though those guys weren’t really part of the crew Twisted Steel hung with, they did have a spot right across from theirs so it was impossible not to see and be around.
She poured the water after measuring the coffee and started the pot, thinking about just what to say to him.
“This seems like one of those times when you’re bothered by something and aren’t telling me. I thought you liked racing?” Duke asked.
“I do. I’m tired, that’s all. I was just thinking about everything I needed to do.”
“Now see, this is a problem because I know this something you’re not saying is about me. I might have to kiss you and rub all over you until you share and people will see.”
Carmella nearly guffawed. “You’re so spoiled.”
“When you’re around, I definitely am. Tell me why you’re hesitating. Has someone said or done something to upset you?”
This was one of those moments where if she pushed him away, he’d stay away. She could tell. Or maybe it was more like she wanted to share, to open up a little, but it wasn’t the right place.
“I really don’t want to do this here. Or now. But it’s nothing you do. I can say that.”
“Fair enough. I do have a rear suspension issue I need to figure out. And a cup of coffee to drink after I hear that sound. I normally would ask you to lunch so we could talk, but I need to work through so I can finish that damned Chevy or die trying before quitting time. Stay home tonight if you want. Leave your kitchen light on if you’re awake and I’ll come over. Work for you?”
She nodded as the coffee finished up and she didn’t even need to fake the nearly orgasmic sound of appreciation she made when she took that first sip.
Maybe she was the one who was spoiled.
Whatever the case, she wasn’t going to overthink it. Much.
Duke tried to put whatever it was bothering Carmella out of his mind that morning and afternoon. But as he did his best thinking while he fiddled with a broken machine, it wasn’t always easy. Mostly he let his brain go, gave over to that part of him that always just seemed to be able to figure out how to fix things.
But in the back of his mind, he thought about the track from her perspective. He knew she’d come out to racing events for years with her cousin Craig. In the months she’d worked at Twisted Steel, she’d become closer friends with PJ, and everyone at the shop seemed to love her just as much.
So it was nearly certainly something else.
“You have a client meeting at four,” Carmella called out as she approached him some hours later.
“Oh shit. I forgot that was today.”
“That’s why I gave you an hour. Mick will be by soon enough to nudge you and Asa.” She kept walking, pausing to speak to Asa.