CHAPTER XXXVII
HORNCASTLE FAIR
It had been my intention to be up and doing early on the followingmorning, but my slumbers proved so profound, that I did not wake untilabout eight; on arising, I again found myself the sole occupant of theapartment, my more alert companion having probably risen at a muchearlier hour. Having dressed myself, I descended, and going to thestable, found my horse under the hands of my friend the ostler, who wascarefully rubbing him down. 'There ain't a better horse in the fair,'said he to me, 'and as you are one of us, and appear to be all right,I'll give you a piece of advice--don't take less than a hundred and fiftyfor him; if you mind your hits, you may get it, for I have known twohundred given in this fair for one no better, if so good.' 'Well,' saidI, 'thank you for your advice, which I will take, and, if successful,will give you "summut" handsome.' 'Thank you,' said the ostler; 'and nowlet me ask whether you are up to all the ways of this here place?' 'Ihave never been here before,' said I, 'but I have a pair of tolerablysharp eyes in my head.' 'That I see you have,' said the ostler, 'butmany a body, with as sharp a pair of eyes as yourn, has lost his horse inthis fair, for want of having been here before. Therefore,' said he,'I'll give you a caution or two.' Thereupon the ostler proceeded to giveme at least half a dozen cautions, only two of which I shall relate tothe reader: the first, not to stop to listen to what any chance customermight have to say; and the last--the one on which he appeared to lay moststress--by no manner of means to permit a Yorkshireman to get up into thesaddle. 'For,' said he, 'if you do, it is three to one that he rides offwith the horse. He can't help it. Trust a cat amongst cream, but nevertrust a Yorkshireman on the saddle of a good horse. By-the-by,' hecontinued, 'that saddle of yours is not a particularly good one, no moreis the bridle. A shabby saddle and a bridle have more than once spoiledthe sale of a good horse. I tell you what, as you seem a decent kind ofa young chap, I'll lend you a saddle and bridle of my master's, almostbran new; he won't object I know, as you are a friend of his, only youmust not forget your promise to come down with summut handsome after youhave sold the animal.'
After a slight breakfast I mounted the horse, which, decked out in hisborrowed finery, really looked better by a large sum of money than on anyformer occasion. Making my way out of the yard of the inn, I wasinstantly in the principal street of the town, up and down which animmense number of horses were being exhibited, some led, and others withriders. 'A wonderful small quantity of good horses in the fair thistime!' I heard a stout jockey-looking individual say, who was staring upthe street with his side towards me. 'Halloo, young fellow!' said he, afew moments after I had passed, 'whose horse is that? Stop! I want tolook at him!' Though confident that he was addressing himself to me, Itook no notice, remembering the advice of the ostler, and proceeded upthe street. My horse possessed a good walking step; but walking, as thereader knows, was not his best pace, which was the long trot, at which Icould not well exercise him in the street, on account of the crowd of menand animals. However, as he walked along, I could easily perceive thathe attracted no slight attention amongst those who, by their jockey dressand general appearance, I imagined to be connoisseurs. I heard variouscalls to stop, to none of which I paid the slightest attention. In a fewminutes I found myself out of the town, when, turning round for thepurpose of returning, I found I had been followed by several of theconnoisseur-looking individuals, whom I had observed in the fair. 'Nowwould be the time for a display,' thought I; and looking around me Iobserved two five-barred gates, one on each side of the road, andfronting each other. Turning my horse's head to one, I pressed my heelsto his sides, loosened the reins, and gave an encouraging cry, whereuponthe animal cleared the gate in a twinkling. Before he had advanced tenyards in the field to which the gate opened, I had turned him round, andagain giving him cry and rein, I caused him to leap back again into theroad, and still allowing him head, I made him leap the other gate; andforthwith turning him round, I caused him to leap once more into theroad, where he stood proudly tossing his head, as much as to say, 'Whatmore?' 'A fine horse! a capital horse!' said several of theconnoisseurs. 'What do you ask for him?' 'Too much for any of you topay,' said I. 'A horse like this is intended for other kind of customersthan any of you.' 'How do you know that?' said one--the very same personwhom I had heard complaining in the street of the paucity of good horsesin the fair. 'Come, let us know what you ask for him?' 'A hundred andfifty pounds!' said I; 'neither more nor less.' 'Do you call that agreat price?' said the man. 'Why, I thought you would have asked doublethat amount! You do yourself injustice, young man.' 'Perhaps I do,'said I; 'but that's my affair; I do not choose to take more.' 'I wishyou would let me get into the saddle,' said the man; 'the horse knowsyou, and therefore shows to more advantage; but I should like to see howhe would move under me, who am a stranger. Will you let me get into thesaddle, young man?' 'No,' said I, 'I will not let you get into thesaddle.' 'Why not?' said the man. 'Lest you should be a Yorkshireman,'said I; 'and should run away with the horse.' 'Yorkshire?' said the man;'I am from Suffolk; silly Suffolk--so you need not be afraid of myrunning away with the horse.' 'Oh! if that's the case,' said I, 'Ishould be afraid that the horse would run away with you; so I will by nomeans let you mount.' 'Will you let me look in his mouth?' said the man.'If you please,' said I; 'but I tell you, he's apt to bite.' 'He canscarcely be a worse bite than his master,' said the man, looking into thehorse's mouth; 'he's four off. I say, young man, will you warrant thishorse?' 'No,' said I; 'I never warrant horses; the horses that I ridecan always warrant themselves.' 'I wish you would let me speak a word toyou,' said he. 'Just come aside. It's a nice horse,' said he, in a halfwhisper, after I had ridden a few paces aside with him. 'It's a nicehorse,' said he, placing his hand upon the pommel of the saddle, andlooking up in my face, 'and I think I can find you a customer. If youwould take a hundred, I think my lord would purchase it, for he has sentme about the fair to look him up a horse, by which he could hope to makea honest penny.' 'Well,' said I, 'and could he not make a honest penny,and yet give me the price I ask?' 'Why,' said the go-between, 'a hundredand fifty pounds is as much as the animal is worth, or nearly so; and mylord, do you see--' 'I see no reason at all,' said I, 'why I should sellthe animal for less than he is worth, in order that his lordship may bebenefited by him; so that if his lordship wants to make an honest penny,he must find some person who would consider the disadvantage of sellinghim a horse for less than it is worth, as counterbalanced by the honourof dealing with a lord, which I should never do; but I can't be wastingmy time here. I am going back to the ---, where if you, or any person,are desirous of purchasing the horse, you must come within the nexthalf-hour, or I shall probably not feel disposed to sell him at all.''Another word, young man,' said the jockey; but without staying to hearwhat he had to say, I put the horse to his best trot, and re-entering thetown, and threading my way as well as I could through the press, Ireturned to the yard of the inn, where, dismounting, I stood still,holding the horse by the bridle.
I had been standing in this manner about five minutes, when I saw thejockey enter the yard, accompanied by another individual. They advanceddirectly towards me. 'Here is my lord come to look at the horse, youngman,' said the jockey. My lord, {224} as the jockey called him, was atall figure of about five-and-thirty. He had on his head a hat somewhatrusty, and on his back a surtout of blue rather the worse for wear. Hisforehead, if not high, was exceedingly narrow; his eyes were brown, witha rat-like glare in them; the nose was rather long, and the mouth verywide; the cheek-bones high, and the cheeks, as to hue and consistency,exhibiting very much the appearance of a withered red apple; there was agaunt expression of hunger in the whole countenance. He had scarcelyglanced at the horse, when drawing in his cheeks, he thrust out his lipsvery much after the manner of a baboon, when he sees a piece of sugarheld out towards him. 'Is this horse yours?' said he, suddenly turningtowards me, with a kind of smirk. 'It's my horse,' said I; 'are you theperson
who wishes to make a honest penny by it?' 'How!' said he, drawingup his head with a very consequential look, and speaking with a veryhaughty tone, 'what do you mean?' We looked at each other full in theface; after a few moments the muscles of the mouth of him of the hungrylook began to move violently, the face was puckered into innumerablewrinkles, and the eyes became half closed. 'Well,' said I, 'have youever seen me before? I suppose you are asking yourself that question.''Excuse me, sir,' said he, dropping his lofty look, and speaking in avery subdued and civil tone, 'I have never had the honour of seeing youbefore, that is'--said he, slightly glancing at me again, and againmoving the muscles of his mouth--'no, I have never seen you before,' headded, making me a low bow, 'I have never had that pleasure; my businesswith you at present is to inquire the lowest price you are willing totake for this horse. My agent here informs me that you ask one hundredand fifty pounds, which I can't think of giving; the horse is a showyhorse, but look, my dear sir, he has a defect here, and there in his nearfore-leg I observe something which looks very like a splint--yes, upon mycredit,' said he, touching the animal, 'he has a splint, or somethingwhich will end in one. A hundred and fifty pounds, sir! What could haveinduced you ever to ask anything like that for this animal? I protestthat, in my time, I have frequently bought a better for ---. Who areyou, sir? I am in treaty for this horse,' said he to a man who had comeup whilst he was talking, and was now looking into the horse's mouth.'Who am I?' said the man, still looking into the horse's mouth--'who amI? his lordship asks me. Ah, I see, close on five,' said he, releasingthe horse's jaws, and looking at me. This new comer was a thin,wiry-made individual, with wiry curling brown hair; his face was dark,and wore an arch and somewhat roguish expression; upon one of his eyeswas a kind of speck or beam; he might be about forty, wore a green jockeycoat, and held in his hand a black riding-whip, with a knob of silverwire. As I gazed upon his countenance it brought powerfully to my mindthe face which, by the light of the candle, I had seen staring over me onthe preceding night, when lying in bed and half asleep. Close besidehim, and seemingly in his company, stood an exceedingly tall figure, thatof a youth, seemingly about one-and-twenty, dressed in a handsomeriding-dress, and wearing on his head a singular hat, green in colour,and with a very high peak. 'What do you ask for this horse?' said he ofthe green coat, winking at me with the eye which had a beam in it, whilstthe other shone and sparkled like Mrs. Colonel W---'s Golconda diamond.'Who are you, sir, I demand once more?' said he of the hungry look. 'Whoam I? Why who should I be but Jack Dale, who buys horses for himself andother folk; I want one at present for this short young gentleman,' saidhe, motioning with his finger to the gigantic youth. 'Well, sir,' saidthe other, 'and what business have you to interfere between me and anypurchase I may be disposed to make?' 'Well, then,' said the other, 'bequick and purchase the horse, or perhaps I may.' 'Do you think I am tobe dictated to by a fellow of your description?' said his lordship;'begone, or--' 'What do you ask for this horse?' said the other to me,very coolly. 'A hundred and fifty,' said I. 'I shouldn't mind giving ityou,' said he. 'You will do no such thing,' said his lordship, speakingso fast that he almost stuttered. 'Sir,' said he to me, 'I must give youwhat you ask. Symmonds, take possession of the animal for me,' said heto the other jockey who attended him. 'You will please to do no suchthing without my consent,' said I; 'I have not sold him.' 'I have thismoment told you that I will give you the price you demand,' said hislordship, 'is not that sufficient?' 'No,' said I, 'there is a propermanner of doing everything. Had you come forward in a manly andgentlemanly manner to purchase the horse, I should have been happy tosell him to you, but after all the fault you have found with him, I wouldnot sell him to you at any price, so send your friend to find upanother.' 'You behave in this manner, I suppose,' said his lordship,'because this fellow has expressed a willingness to come to your terms.I would advise you to be cautious how you trust the animal in his hands;I think I have seen him before, and could tell you--' 'What can you tellof me?' said the other, going up to him, 'except that I have been a poordicky-boy, {226a} and that now I am a dealer in horses, and that myfather was lagged? {226b} that is all you could tell of me, and that Idon't mind telling myself; but there are two things they can't say of me,they can't say that I am either a coward, or a screw either, except sofar as one who gets his bread by horses may be expected to be; and theycan't say of me that I ever ate up an ice which a young woman was waitingfor, or that I ever backed out of a fight. Horse!' said he, motioningwith his finger tauntingly to the other, 'what do you want with a horse,except to take the bread out of the mouth of a poor man--to-morrow is notthe battle of Waterloo, so that you don't want to back out of danger bypretending to have hurt yourself by falling from the creature's back, mylord of the white feather--come, none of your fierce looks--I am notafraid of you.' In fact, the other had assumed an expression of thedeadliest malice, his teeth were clenched, his lips quivered and werequite pale; the rat-like eyes sparkled, and he made a half spring, a larat, towards his adversary, who only laughed. Restraining himself,however, he suddenly turned to his understrapper, saying, 'Symmonds, willyou see me thus insulted? Go and trounce this scoundrel; you can, Iknow.' 'Symmonds trounce me!' said the other, going up to the personaddressed, and drawing his hand contemptuously over his face; 'why I beatSymmonds in this very yard in one round three years ago, didn't I,Symmonds?' said he to the understrapper, who held down his head,muttering in a surly tone, 'I didn't come here to fight; let every onetake his own part.' 'That's right, Symmonds,' said the other,'especially every one from whom there is nothing to be got. I would giveyou half-a crown for all the trouble you have had, provided I were notafraid that my Lord Plume there would get it from you as soon as youleave the yard together. Come, take yourselves both off; there's nothingto be made here.' Indeed, his lordship seemed to be of the same opinion,for after a further glance at the horse, a contemptuous look at me, and ascowl at the jockey, he turned on his heel, muttering something whichsounded like fellows, and stalked out of the yard, followed by Symmonds.
'And now, young man,' said the jockey, or whatever he was, turning to mewith an arch leer, 'I suppose I may consider myself as the purchaser ofthis here animal, for the use and behoof of this young gentleman,' makinga sign with his head towards the tall young man by his side. 'By nomeans,' said I, 'I am utterly unacquainted with either of you, and beforeparting with the horse I must be satisfied as to the respectability ofthe purchaser.' 'Oh! as to that matter,' said he, 'I have plenty ofvouchers for my respectability about me;' and, thrusting his hand intohis bosom below his waistcoat, he drew out a large bundle of notes.'These are the kind of things,' said he, 'which vouch best for a man'srespectability.' 'Not always,' said I; 'indeed, sometimes these kind ofthings need vouchers for themselves.' The man looked at me with apeculiar look. 'Do you mean to say that these notes are not sufficientnotes?' said he, 'because if you do I shall take the liberty of thinkingthat you are not over civil, and when I thinks a person is not over andabove civil I sometimes takes off my coat; and when my coat is off--.''You sometimes knock people down,' I added; 'well, whether you knock medown or not, I beg leave to tell you that I am a stranger in this fair,and that I shall part with the horse to nobody who has no betterguarantee for his respectability than a roll of bank-notes, which may begood or not for what I know, who am not a judge of such things.' 'Oh! ifyou are a stranger here,' said the man, 'as I believe you are, neverhaving seen you here before except last night, when I think I saw youabove stairs by the glimmer of a candle--I say, if you are a stranger,you are quite right to be cautious; queer things being done in this fair,as nobody knows better than myself,' he added, with a leer; 'but Isuppose if the landlord of the house vouches for me and my notes, youwill have no objection to part with the horse to me?' 'None whatever,'said I, 'and in the meantime the horse can return to the stable.'
Thereupon I delivered the horse to my friend the ostler. The landlord ofthe house, on being questioned by me as to the charac
ter and condition ofmy new acquaintance, informed me that he was a respectable horsedealer,and an intimate friend of his, whereupon the purchase was soon brought toa satisfactory conclusion.