“People—things—keep acting in your name, attempting to accomplish your goals no matter the collateral damage. And you keep letting them.”
“I didn’t let them!” I shoved myself up, hunched over the table. At my outburst, James stepped forward, but that was all. A warning. I dropped my voice to a growl. “You have no idea what it’s like when people are willing to go to frightening lengths for you. When you can’t predict their actions. You have no idea what a terrifying burden that is.”
“Believe me, I do. I’ve seen enough well-meaning and untrained people pretend to be Black Knife because they wanted to help. But I stopped them, because I couldn’t allow them to get hurt—or anyone else they came in contact with.” He balled his fists and leaned forward, so close I could feel the heat of him. “You have to stop those people from making mistakes, especially the ones that hurt innocents like Meredith. How will you be a strong queen if you can’t trust your people to make wise decisions?”
Chills crawled over my body. I sat back down and whispered, “I don’t know.”
“You need to figure it out, Wilhelmina. What kind of queen will you be? The kind who allows others to murder in her name, or the kind who makes decisions her conscience can agree with? You might have spent the last nine years as a criminal, doing what you thought was necessary for survival, but you aren’t that girl anymore.”
“Aren’t I?” I fought to keep my voice level. “I’m still a criminal. I’m a flasher. I’ve forged dozens of official documents. Being a princess doesn’t cancel the fact that I impersonated a duchess for weeks. I am still that girl.”
The room was silent.
“But maybe you’re right. Maybe I’m not that girl anymore: maybe I’m worse. You don’t know what I am, anymore. You cannot fathom what I’ve endured. Don’t imagine you’ve tamed me.”
Tobiah stood, disgust written on his face. “Here’s what I know. You want your kingdom back. My uncle is less inclined than ever to enter negotiations, and most everyone thinks you should be in prison. I must do something, though I disagree prison is the answer. Your wraith pet could see it as a threat against you. Or you could just call him to you—or turn him against the city.”
He might as well have punched me. “If you think I’d even consider that, you really don’t know me at all.”
“Maybe I don’t. As you’ve reminded me.” He strode toward the door, James at his heels. When he faced me again, his expression was stiff. Resolved. “I’ve arranged for a house in Hawksbill. You will move in tonight, the rest of the Ospreys with you. And in case you think I’m simply allowing my people to be in danger, rather than myself, the house will be guarded at every opening. Doors. Windows. Even fireplaces. Mirrors are being installed on the ceiling of every room. Your wraith boy, if you will not send him away for good, will be confined to a wardrobe with mirrors surrounding it. If he tries to leave—”
“Will we all be confined to the house?” I asked.
“Everything you need will be provided. The tutor you hired will go to the house for lessons and training. When your presence is required here, you will be escorted. You will have no other reason to leave.”
My stomach knotted. “So we will be prisoners.”
“I cannot prevent you from seeing yourself that way.” His expression hardened. “Your wraith killed my fiancée. Not to mention several guards of the Indigo Order.”
“I wonder if others in the Indigo Order will be satisfied with that arrangement.” I cocked my head, as though honestly curious. “I wonder if they’ll see their new assignments as opportunities for revenge.”
“This isn’t the first time you’ve questioned my people’s honor,” Tobiah said, “and I know you struggle with trusting anyone in a position of authority. But I’ll tell you this one more time: you can trust that I trust them.”
“You want to keep me prisoner. Tell me why I should trust you.”
He jammed his fingers through his hair. “I must do something to show I am not complicit, nor do I approve of what was done today, regardless of your instructions—or lack of—to the wraith boy. There was a murder. Further lives were lost in the fight. Your wraith boy cannot understand the consequences of today, but surely you must see that being relocated to a comfortable house in Hawksbill is a punishment offered only to queens.”
I glanced at James, and he shifted closer to Tobiah. “Don’t punish the rest of the Ospreys.”
“They’re already on their way to the house.” He pulled open the door. “Your maid will be up to help you pack the necessities. The black bag isn’t one of them. And when it’s time to move your friend, a box will be provided.”
“I have another idea.”
Tobiah waited.
“You said Prince Colin would leave for Aecor—” After the wedding. After the disaster. “You said Prince Colin wanted to quell Patrick’s rebellion and retake Aecor City.”
“Yes.”
“I will go with him.” I lifted my chin. “You say I’m not your hostage or prisoner. Let me prove it to my people. In the meantime, it will get me out of Skyvale. No one wants me here.”
Muscles around Tobiah’s jaw flexed. “There’s war in Aecor City. You’d be walking straight into danger.”
“If I don’t take that risk, I have no business being queen.”
For the first time since the wedding, he locked eyes with me. But there was no warmth. No worry. Nothing but assessment and barely contained grief. “Fine. But you’ll go without the other Ospreys, and you’ll be closely guarded. You will be under Indigo Kingdom authority, with none of your own. You are still a ward of the Indigo Kingdom and subject to all that entails.”
“I understand.”
When both boys left the room, I began to pack.
TWENTY-TWO
“HOW LONG DO we have to stay here?” Connor asked.
“Until King Tobiah gives you permission to leave.”
By Hawksbill standards, the house was small, but it had plenty of space for us. Several rooms had a private washroom attached, so no one would have to share. The kitchen pantry was fully stocked, and Carl had already declared his intentions to learn to cook. Four small desks had been moved into the library for their sessions with Alana Todd. Mirrors on every wall and ceiling made the house a fortress against the wraith boy, who was locked in a wardrobe, which was tucked into a broom closet.
In spite of the generous accommodations, to the Ospreys, moving from the palace to the house was not much different from being transferred from one prison to another.
“I don’t want to stay here.” Carl picked up a silver box of mints and started to put it in his pocket, but laid it down instead. He didn’t even want to steal anymore.
I paced the length of the parlor, the plush carpet softening my footfalls. “You’ll follow the king’s orders, attend your lessons, and behave exactly as you would for me.”
Theresa cocked an eyebrow.
“Better than you would for me,” I amended. “Behave as if you actually know what it means to be nobility and future leaders in Aecor.”
“Shouldn’t we go with you?” Kevin asked. “There’s only a few months until the anniversary, and if we’re supposed to meet that deadline . . .”
The other Ospreys nodded in agreement.
“None of you are coming with me.” I held up a hand to forestall Theresa, who perched on the arm of a chair, tracing the fleur-de-lis pattern in the upholstery. “No, not even you.”
She scowled and slumped back. “What will people say, you going to Aecor without a female companion?”
“What does that matter, compared to what they already say? I can silence entire rooms by walking through a door.” It had been two days since the wedding and I’d been back and forth from the palace seven times to sign things, answer questions, and mostly just be inconvenienced. As though forcing me to make the short trip so often were anywhere close to the punishment I deserved.
But I was a princess—a future queen: nothing they were p
ermitted to do would ever come close to making reparation.
“I don’t like you going alone,” muttered Kevin.
“I’ll be traveling with Crown Prince Colin,” I said, “and heading toward Patrick. I won’t drag any of you into a war.”
“How will we know you’re safe, though?” Connor turned his silver mirror in his hands, faster and faster. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“The wraith boy will be with me.” I glanced at his broom closet. “He won’t let anyone hurt me.”
The room went silent while everyone took that in.
“What is your plan?” Kevin asked. “You’ll be traveling with enemies, and the wraith boy isn’t exactly trustworthy. And in Aecor . . .”
There’d be Patrick and the Ospreys who’d followed him, and the resistance groups who’d united to fight in my name. The Red Militia. Not to mention the other dangers present in a city whose leadership was in flux. Crime. Violence. Desperate people doing desperate things.
“Will you declare yourself queen?” Carl asked. “That’s what Patrick wants you to do. And what everyone will expect.”
The others all nodded, their message clear: they’d like me to declare myself queen, too. They viewed it as a solution to all our problems.
If I declared myself queen, I’d start a war against the Indigo Kingdom.
“I can’t.” I looked them all in the eye, one at a time. “Not yet. Our relationship with the Indigo Kingdom is already fragile. Even more now that Meredith—” Her name caught in my throat. I took a steadying breath and tried again. “I’m not sure we’ll ever be able to fully recover from what happened at the wedding.”
“But it wasn’t your fault!” Connor pressed his mirror against his knees. “You didn’t tell the wraith boy to kill her. You didn’t want any of that to happen.”
“You’re right.” I fought to keep my voice even, but it was too late: the cracks were showing. “I didn’t want that to happen, but it did, and because the wraith boy is supposed to be under my control, I need to accept responsibility. That’s part of what it means to be a queen.”
Connor and Theresa both stared down at their knees. Carl and Kevin glared toward the closet containing the wraith boy.
“If I declare myself queen now, it will mean I’ve sided with Patrick, and that Aecor is truly at war with the Indigo Kingdom. It won’t be just the Red Militia rising against Indigo Kingdom rule. I don’t like Prince Colin controlling my kingdom any more than the rest of you, but for now I must help him calm the rebellion growing in the capital. I must announce directly to the people that the letters I sent were genuine, and that I’m working with the Indigo Kingdom to peacefully reclaim the vermillion throne.”
“You think that will be it?” Kevin asked. “That you’ll just go in and everything will be fine once you explain?”
“And you’ll accept Prince Colin’s authority?” Theresa shuddered.
“No, I don’t anticipate it will be that simple, but I hope that the reappearance of their long-lost princess will force people to listen. The wraith is already close. I need to stop the war so we can focus on bigger problems.”
“Patrick will find some way to turn this all against you.” Kevin drummed his fingers on his knee. “He’s wanted this war for years.”
“He has.” I paused next to a bookcase, the gold-foil titles gleaming in the lamplight: A History of Mirrors, The Flora of the Indigo Valley, and The One-Night War: An Indigo Kingdom Victory. “Nevertheless, I’m going to do everything in my power.”
“I don’t think this is safe,” Connor said.
It wasn’t safe. Not here. Not there. The only safe place in the world was Mirror Lake. “I know.”
“How will we communicate?” Connor asked again.
“By courier, I assume. Unless you know of a better way.”
“Magic?” His voice was small. “I just want to know you’re safe. You’ll be all alone.”
I ran my fingers across the spine of The World Poison: Magic and sighed. “I have an idea.” I headed into the study, where I found a pair of white notebooks, blank on every page. “Wake up,” I whispered. “Be the same. What is written in one will be written in the other—at the same time and in the same hand—no matter the distance.”
A wave of dizziness surged through my head, and I gripped the desk to steady myself. When it passed, I took the notebooks out to the parlor again to explain how they’d work.
I emerged from the house as cold dawn glowed over the valley. The mountains were dark with winter, and as familiar as the Ospreys’ faces. For years we’d lived in the old palace in those mountains. Now I’d be going through them, down the piedmont, and beyond. . . .
“This way, Your Highness.” Sergeant Ferris ushered me toward the carriage that would take me to Prince Colin’s convoy. The driver sat on the front seat, glaring at the pair of bay horses. “Your belongings are already stowed in the convoy wagon.”
“The wraith boy?” I was stalling. I knew his wardrobe had been taken to the convoy because I’d ordered him to cooperate—to simply accept any bruises gathered while the wardrobe shifted around him, and not react to any jeers or insults given through the crack in the door.
Sergeant Ferris motioned at the carriage. “Your Highness—”
The front door opened again and Connor threw himself outside, clad only in his bedclothes and a too-big coat. No shoes. “Wil! I caught you!” He hugged me so tightly I nearly fell over.
“Barely.” I glanced at the carriage, as though irritated and pressed for time. “I was about to leave.”
Sergeant Ferris’s disapproving frown shifted into the palest of smiles.
“I wanted to give you this.” Connor thrust his small silver mirror into my hands. “In case he turns on you.”
I gripped the tarnished piece of metal and studied his thin, earnest face. “Won’t you need it?” It was his prized possession, with stylized birds stamped into the border.
“You’ll need it more.” He offered an awkward, sideways hug.
I forced a smile. “Thank you.”
Before I could say anything else, he was back inside.
“That was a sweet gesture.”
Inside the carriage, I spread my gray travel dress over my legs and tucked the silver mirror into a pocket in my bag. “Connor is the younger brother I always wanted.” My chest felt heavy as I glanced at the house once more, and found four faces peering out of the second-story bedroom overlooking the road. I snapped and thumped my chest, but the carriage jerked into motion before I had a chance to see if they’d noticed the salute.
“You’ve known him a long time.”
“After the One-Night War, a handful of toddlers were taken to the orphanage. Connor and Carl. The third, Ezra, died a few months ago during a mission Patrick sent him on. His older sister was killed, too.” I squeezed the signet ring on a chain around my neck. “I hadn’t wanted them to go. I thought it was too dangerous. But Patrick insisted.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I want him stopped, Sergeant. No matter what anyone thinks about me, I want Patrick Lien stopped.”
As we drove through Hawksbill, I could almost pretend this was an official state visit and something good was about to happen. Not that this was a desperate ploy to halt a war. Not that I was fleeing the Indigo Kingdom where I was unanimously reviled.
At last, we stopped at the main avenue leading out of the district. This was where I’d been arrested after my Liadian residency papers had been discovered as forgeries, and where I’d been revealed as Princess Wilhelmina, thanks to the newly solid wraith boy.
The convoy was almost ready. Bridles clanked and men called orders. Maids scurried from place to place, carrying baskets and boxes. Soldiers checked wheels, hinges, and locks on supply wagons. Indigo banners snapped in the breeze, bearing family crests and House sigils. Hawksbill residents stared out from their windows or doors; some of the ladies gave silk scarves or lace shawls to the soldiers. For luck. For prot
ection, as though they were going to fight the wraith.
“Where will I be?” I asked Sergeant Ferris.
He handed my bag to me, Connor’s mirror peeking out from a pocket. A proper princess would have allowed him to carry it, but the idea of being separated from my emergency supplies—a change of clothes, weapons, rations—made me nauseous.
“The king ordered a wagon for you.” He pointed toward a pale wagon with red trim and wheels, and a flock of ospreys painted under the eaves.
“What a good target it will make when someone wonders if it would be easier to set me on fire than endure my presence on the way to Aecor.”
“Ever the pessimist.” Tobiah’s voice made my stomach drop, and I spun around.
“Your Majesty.” I dipped into a polite curtsy as Tobiah and James emerged from the crowd of nobles saying good-bye. “Come to see off your uncle?”
He glanced toward the fore of the convoy. “Yes, of course. But there was something I needed to discuss with you.”
I straightened my shoulders and lifted my chin. “Yes?”
“Walk with me to your wagon.” He gestured forward, and James and Sergeant Ferris took up their places behind us. “There are two things. First, I’m sending James with you.”
I turned my head so sharply my neck stung. “James?”
Tobiah gave a stiff nod. “Sergeant Ferris will stay here with the Aecorian nobles. He will be their guard.”
I hated when plans changed at the last minute.
As we strode down the avenue, soldiers and maids hurried out of our way. A few bowed or curtsied, but toward Tobiah, who wore a mourning gray suit and nothing to denote his rank. They simply knew.
Several rude looks and little fingers were aimed my way, but I ignored them.
“I have found Sergeant Ferris a more than adequate guard, and I’d hate to deprive you of your cousin,” I said at last. I kept my tone even, but I knew why he’d switched my guard: both the captain and sergeant would spy on me for him, but this way he could keep the Ospreys feeling secure. By leaving them with someone they knew, they’d speak more freely. After all, he’d been my guard. He was a trusted figure, as far as members of the Indigo Order went.