Part Four CHAPTER 12
Elise stared at the empty place where Sterling had stood. What was he afraid of? Did he think she could never be happy living the life he lived? Did he believe she'd prefer a dull life with a man of wealth? She riffled through her valise and retrieved her nightgown.
Although she'd been frightened of the troupe players when she'd first met them, she'd come to realize that regardless of their differences, they were ordinary people. All but Mora, leastwise. Elise still considered the snake charmer as dangerous as she had the first time she'd met the woman. Regardless, Elise could be happy among these people, if Sterling would only surrender to his feelings and open himself to her. She could truly live the life of an adventurer as she had always dreamed of doing. And she could dance for many if, in her mind, she only danced for the man she loved.
Elise slipped off the skimpy costume, tugging her modest nightgown over her head. There was a soft rap upon the wagon door. She heard a child's voice on the other side.
"I have your veils!" Dawn called.
Swinging the door open, Elise frowned down at the girl. "I thought you were supposed to be in bed. "
Dawn handed her the veils. "I had to see your first performance, and you did very well. I heard my mother tell Philip that you brought in the most coins this evening. " She glanced behind Elise, as if looking for someone. "Where is Sterling? I thought for sure he'd be here with you. "
The girl really was exposed to more than a child her age should be, Elise decided. "Sterling has gone out for a while, and you must go to bed. It isn't safe for you to roam about after dark. "
"You sound like my mother," Dawn complained. "I-I thought we were friends. "
Elise smiled. "We are friends, and friends care about each other. I'm concerned for your well-being. "
Dawn blushed. "All right. I'll hurry back to my parents' wagon. I'll be quiet as a mouse and as fleet as a deer. "
And she was. The girl disappeared. Elise shut the door, turned out the lantern, and crawled into the cot. She felt a certain elation that she had danced tonight and, she supposed, well enough. But Sterling had stolen her joy. Why was he so stubborn? She knew he desired her. Elise was ready to give herself, but he kept promising one thing with his eyes and denying that promise with his lips.
The door creaked. She held her breath. Would he come to her now and make her a woman, make her his woman? The door softly closed and she sighed, not with relief but with frustration. Well, perhaps he at least battled the desire to surrender to her. Maybe he would lose before the night's end.
Elise snuggled deeper beneath her blanket and closed her eyes. She'd nearly drifted off when she felt a presence - an intruder in her bed. Her heart nearly stopped beating. What had crawled beneath the covers with her did not caress her with warm, gentle fingers but slithered against her legs.
Sterling paced beside the animal wagons. Raja and Leena were once again huddled in their corners, warily watching him. He could not get Elise out of his head. He wanted her, wanted her more than he'd ever wanted anything in his life, but the curse stood between them.
"I know what you're thinking," he said to the cats. "You're thinking that it's already too late, but you're wrong. " He clasped the bars of Raja's cage and stared at him. "Look at me. I haven't changed. " He held out his hands. "Skin, not fur. I am a man, not a beast!"
Raja rushed forward and slashed at him, his sharp claws connecting with Sterling's hand. Stumbling back, Sterling swore, then brought the injured hand to his mouth. He tasted blood. He'd forgotten his own rules concerning the cats. Lowering his guard with them for even a moment had cost him a nasty scratch.
He glared at the tiger, heard an animalistic growl of warning rise from his human throat. Raja slunk back into his corner. The scratch stung. Sterling knew he must tend to it, but that would mean returning to his wagon for the necessary supplies. That would mean facing the temptation of Elise again. He tore a piece of cloth from the hem of his shirt and wound it around his hand. His gaze cut toward the moonlit shape of his wagon. No light shining from beneath the crack of the door. Elise had gone to bed. . . alone.
As if he had no will of his own, Sterling was drawn toward the wagon - helpless to resist. He eased open the door and climbed inside, careful to close it softly. Elise did not speak to him. He listened to the thick silence. She was asleep. Sterling unwrapped his hand and used the basin to clean the scratch. It stung slightly. He started to leave but couldn't resist standing over Elise, staring down at her. To his surprise, he could see unusually well.
Elise's eyes stared up at him. Her face looked like a pale moon in the darkness. He could not hear her breathing. . . but wait - he swore he heard the sound of her heart pounding frantically inside of her chest. Or was it his? He started to touch her, but her eyes widened. Then he sensed it. . . a cold and deadly presence.
Something moved beneath her blanket, winding a path upward. Sterling held his breath, stood very still. Once the snake's head appeared, frightfully close to Elise's neck, Sterling snatched the reptile, kicked open the door, and flung it outside.
Elise wanted to scream, but her throat felt frozen with terror. She turned her head to see Sterling outlined against the doorway, his hands pressed on either side, looking as if he was having trouble catching his breath. She owed him her life.
"Sterling," she managed to whisper.
He turned slowly to face her. Her breath lodged in her throat and her heart lurched again. In the moonlight spilling through the open doorway, he looked different. His eyes had an unnatural glow about them, and his features seemed distorted. His nose appeared longer, his teeth gleamed white, but they were pointed. She closed her eyes tight, hoping that when she opened them, he would appear normal.
She heard the door close and felt him settle next to her. "Elise, are you all right?"
Forcing her eyes open, she glanced up at him. The moonlight was gone, and so was her ability to see him clearly. "Light the lantern," she demanded in a shaky voice.
A soft glow filled the wagon and chased away the shadows. Sterling rejoined her. She ran her gaze over him. He looked like the same handsome man she knew. "Sterling," she sobbed, then threw her arms around his neck. "I was so frightened. "
He ran a hand over her hair. "It's gone. You're safe. " His fingers tightened around a thick strand. "I will strangle Mora for putting your life in danger. " He started to rise, but Elise clung to him.
"Don't leave me. I need you. "
His muscles were tense, but as she held him, he relaxed. Elise pressed her head against his solid chest. The steady beat of his heart calmed her. Once her terror began to fade, she noticed the heat and strength of his body - how safe she felt in his arms.
She lifted her head to look up at him. Their lips were a breath apart. The soft lantern light bathed them within a cozy glow. Sterling stared down into her eyes. She silently begged for him to kiss her. Tonight had shown her how short life could be. Elise realized that there was no one in the world whom she would rather spend her time with than Sterling.
Slowly, his head lowered and his mouth brushed hers. She moaned over the gentleness of his kiss, marveled that a big man, strong as an ox and as tall as a tree, could be tender with her. He gently nudged her mouth open, his tongue slipping inside, and thoughts of sweetness faded. Elise knotted her fingers into his long hair. She hadn't known that the touch of tongues, the wetness and warmth of two mouths joined, would heat her blood and make her ache for more.
He touched her through her nightgown - cupped her breast, his thumb rubbing her nipple through the thin fabric until it hardened. She wanted closer contact. She wanted skin against skin. As if he knew her thoughts, he gathered her nightgown, pulling it up past her hips and over her head. Elise now sat before him naked. Some small part of her chastised her lack of modesty with him, but in truth, she felt no embarrassment, only excitement as his gaze
ran the length of her and he sucked in his breath.
"My God, Elise," he rasped. "You are perfect to my eyes. "
His praise sent tingles of pleasure racing over her skin. A moment later, his hands followed their pathway. His fingertips brushed her breasts, her stomach, hips, thighs.
"So soft. " He lowered his mouth to her breasts, traced lazy circles around her nipples; then he gently sucked one inside of his mouth. Her fingers tightened against his scalp. She threw back her head and moaned. Never had she imagined that a man's lips against her breasts could create such delicious sensations. It was as if a tiny string were attached to her stomach muscles and his mouth. The harder he sucked, the tighter he drew the string.
He stretched her to the breaking point. Drove her wild with the flame of his tongue. Sliding her hands through the opening of his shirt, she felt the strong beating of his heart.
"Remove your shirt," she whispered. "I want to touch you, the way that you're touching me. "
In one fluid movement his shirt was gone. The sight of his bare muscular chest always took her breath away. She ran her fingers over him. Warm, smooth, hard muscle stretched over strong bones. What would it feel like to press her naked flesh against his? He pulled her into his arms, and she had her answer. A lightning bolt couldn't have generated more heat between them.
"I should go," he said, pushing her down onto the cot. "I should go before I can't leave you be. "
She tangled her fingers into his hair and pulled his lips to hers. "I don't want you to go. I don't want you to leave me be. "
The lips she offered him in surrender, he took. His kisses grew deeper, hotter, more demanding. She met his urgency, her tongue dancing with his. Then his hand slid between her legs, caressing her in a place that no man had dared venture. But he dared much, her Beast Tamer. He stroked her - long, steady strokes that soon had her gasping for breath and moving wildly against him. It was as if all her thoughts, all her sensation, pulsed beneath his skilled fingers.
She wanted more, ached for what she could not name. When he pressed against her and she felt the hard length of him through his cossacks, she understood what she wanted. The joining. The completion that would make her his, and him hers. Bravely, she fumbled with the drawstring at the top of his breeches, loosening them to the point that she could slip her hand inside. Her fingers found him. They both gasped.
Huge, was the first thought that came to her mind. Frightening, but so warm, hard steel wrapped in smooth velvet. She ran her fingers the length of him, her courage fueled by the soft groans she stole from his lips.
"Elise," he said. "You're killing me. You will be my ruin. "
Wicked, she must be wicked through and through, because the thought of being his weakness excited her. The tip of her fingernail glided over the tip of his manhood, and he shucked the cossacks altogether. He and Elise now lay naked together, and she instinctively knew there would be no turning back. Not now. Not ever.
"Do you know about the first time?" he asked, his heated gaze staring down at her. "Do you know about the pain?"
Pain? No, Elise knew nothing about intimate matters between men and women. Her uncle had only told her they were to be avoided at all cost until she went to her marriage bed. He'd offered her nothing else upon the subject. She shook her head.
Sterling sighed and pressed his forehead to hers. "I'll be as gentle as I can. Trust me, Elise. "
She trusted him completely. A woman couldn't love a man she couldn't trust. "Make me a woman. Make me your woman. "
Her trust should have been enough to shrivel him. But it did not. He wanted her more than life, more than a normal life, leastwise. A beast, whether brought by a curse or nay, lived inside of all men. The beast was upon him now, and having her beneath him, soft subtle skin stretched over womanly curves, he could not deny what she offered him. He could not resist the love shining from her eyes. He wanted that, to be loved. To love in return without fear of what the loving might cost him. Tonight, he would show no fear.
He touched her where he knew her sensation centered. Stroked her until she moved against him, hot, wet, ready for him. He took her to the edge of sanity, and as soon as he felt the tremors begin, he entered her in one great thrust. Her shocked cry of pain mingled with her moans of release and his own deep groans of heaven and hell. Hell that he had hurt her, heaven to be inside of her, buried to the hilt within her tight confines. The force of her release squeezed him until he thought he would spill himself. He grappled for control, then bent to kiss the tears from her cheeks. "The pain is over, Elise. Now there will be only pleasure. " Eyes bright with tears, she stared up at him, and although her voice trembled, she said, "I could do with more pleasure and less pain. I trust you to keep your word upon the matter. " He smiled down at her. What a marvel. How brave and passionate despite her strict upbringing. She was the type of woman men dreamed about but seldom found. And tonight, she belonged to him and he to her. He began to move, slowly, gently, to show her that the pain would not come again. Gradually, her hips arched against him of their own will. He lost himself inside of her. All thoughts but the feel, scent, and taste of her left his mind. He nibbled upon her ear and whispered, "Dance for me, Elise. "
She did dance for him. She gyrated her hips against his, gasping when the motion drew him deeper - down into the very core of her. They were slick with sweat against each other, drowning in the moist heat of seeking mouths and tangled limbs. With each steady thrust, he fanned the flame higher and higher. She was consumed by him - by the friction of their joined bodies, the tingling, the building force that sent her ever closer to the edge of madness. When the shudders wracked her, she arched against him, calling his name over and over as she burst, heat and pleasure spreading through her like a slow burn. He thrust deep, paused as if on the brink of his own fall to death, then pulled from her abruptly, his body jerking, his words a jumble of curses and endearments that sent her cheeks to flaming even hotter.
He rolled to his side and pulled her close, their hearts pounding against each other in unison. "I didn't know," she whispered, awed by the force of what had taken place between them. "I didn't know it would be this way. That loving you would make me feel so complete. "
Sterling kissed the top of her head. "I didn't know, either," he admitted. "Until you, I had only walked in darkness. My heart and my eyes closed. Now, all will be different for me. "
Odd, but he hadn't made his last statement sound as if he found the change appealing. Elise snuggled closer to his warmth. "Would it shock you if I told you that I would like for you to love me again?"
His lips touched her ear. "It would shock and delight me," he said. "I had thought I would be forced to seduce you again before morning. You save me the trouble. "
She sighed. "I would hate to be a bother. "
"You are a bother," he assured her. "But you are worth it. You are worth everything. "
And his lips halted any further comment she might make.