“Wait, you knew what I had to do this whole time?”
“It made no difference what I knew. It only mattered what you knew. What you could see. What path you took and what decisions you made. This was a journey for you and you alone. It was not something anyone could tell you. You needed to realize it for yourself. There was no other way.”
I close my eyes and breathe deeply, letting her words sink in. “I’m good,” I whisper several moments later. “I care about people and their feelings. I want to do the right thing. I want to love and be loved.”
“Yes,” she murmurs.
I open my eyes and look at her. “But I wield a dark and terrible power that takes great responsibility. I am born of an ancient force bigger than any man or creature. And I must be here in this world because I have a duty to protect the balance of life.”
Tatiana nods, her milky eyes glistening.
I turn my face to the window and smile.
“I think I need to go outside for a while. I really need to feel the sun on my skin.”
********
I’ve been wandering around the woods outside the cabin for about an hour, just taking it all in, and I haven’t stopped smiling for one second. I hear the crunching of leaves and turn to see Corrine headed toward me. I smile even wider and race over to give her a big hug.
“Whoa… hey, now. Don’t forget you have that freaky supernatural strength, girl!” she says, laughing and coughing at the same time.
I pull away and give her a sheepish look. “Sorry.”
She grins, and then glances down at her feet. “I really hope it’s okay that I came out here. I know everyone is sorta giving you your space right now, but I just needed to check in on you and see how you’re doing. Make sure you’re all right.”
“Thank you… I’m glad you came. I’m doing okay. Adjusting.” I chuckle under my breath. “Come on, let me show you this cool place over by the pond. I just can’t get over how gorgeous it is out here this time of day! I mean, I know I’ve seen this all before, but at the same time, it’s almost like I’m seeing everything for the first time! It’s so freaking surreal, like really vivid déjà vu or something. Everything is just so… beautiful.”
“Well, I’m happy to hear that. But I’ll just have to take your word for it, ‘cause I’m blind as a bat without my glasses. Stupid Belith broke ‘em. Now I need to get me some new ones.” She grimaces.
I smack my hand to my forehead. “I thought there was something different about you! Ugh, I’m so sorry! I’m all wrapped up in my own world here. How are you?” I give her arm a gentle squeeze, and suddenly I’m understanding the horrors she witnessed.
She shrugs. “Well, other than not being able to see for squat, I’m great. Maybe I’ll just—”
“Wait, stop. Don’t move.” I place my hand over her face, letting the heat from my palm radiate over her eyes. A moment later I pull away. She gasps.
She blinks several times and looks around, astonishment all over her face. “Oh my God,” she whispers. “I can’t… I can’t believe it. How did you…?”
“I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I never healed you before. I really should have – oompf!”
This time it’s Corrine throwing her arms around me in an exuberant, bone-crushing hug, and I laugh again.
We continue on our way to the pond, and I try to take in and absorb the wondrous beauty all around me. The leaves are so much greener, the sky is bluer… even the air is fresher. But as we continue along the winding path back to the cabin, my heart begins to feel heavy. I don’t want to spoil her happy mood, especially after all we’ve been through lately. But pretending that nothing happened isn’t fair to her either. She deserves better than that.
“Corrine, I need to apologize to you,” I begin as we head around a bend. “I want to tell you how sorry I am for everything that’s happened. Everything you’ve been through.”
She stops walking and reaches for my arm, holding me back. “Wait— What? I’m not! I mean, at the time, sure it was no picnic. But we survived! We won! I mean, come on… how badass are we?”
I frown and shake my head. “You went thought a lot of shit on my account. You have more horrible memories in your head than any human should ever have to endure. But I can make those memories disappear for you… make you forget the kidnappings, the demons trying to rape you, the Belith torturing you—”
She holds up her hand. “Are you crazy? No way! I earned those memories. Don’t you see? All those awful things happened, and I survived! I got through it, and I’m okay. Better than. Puts a lot of things in perspective if you ask me. Please don’t take those memories away. They’re mine. Even the horrible ones. They haven’t broken me… they’ve only made me stronger!”
I smile at her, amazed that this is the same girl I used to hide out with at lunchtime ‘cause no one else wanted to talk to us. Because we were weird. Because we were freaks.
Or maybe it was because we were just a little more badass than everyone else…
“You just can’t fully appreciate the awesomeness of life until you’ve been tortured by a mob of angry, blood-thirsty demons,” she continues with a grin. “Please tell me how anything will ever seem like a problem after that!”
I can’t help but laugh. “Good point.”
She suddenly becomes serious and peeks over at me. “How are you? Really. Everything that’s happening with you… the changes… how are you really?”
Just then the crunch of more twigs and leaves beneath heavy footsteps has us both glancing over our shoulders. Vincent is coming around the bend behind us.
I give Corrine a quick wink and whisper, “Really… I’ve never been better.”
She nods, her eyes wide. “I know, right? That guy is the hotness. And he cares about you so much. He really does. He’s been so concerned this whole time. You definitely have my seal of approval.”
“Hey. Hope I’m not interrupting anything.” He almost sounds a little shy.
“Hey, Vincent. No, we were just stretching our legs a bit,” Corrine says. “I think I’m going to go see what Demetri is up to. He was saying something about pizza earlier.” She gives Vincent a quick pat on the arm as she passes him.
I give her a small wave, and Vincent nods.
Suddenly my insides are a wild flurry of nerves, but I quell them immediately. I don’t recall having that kind of control over my emotions before, but I’m still caught off-guard by how much I like being in Vincent’s presence. It just feels so damn right.
“You clean up nice.” I run my hand lightly over his cashmere sweater. It accentuates his muscular build nicely, but without being too obvious.
He grins. “When I’m not neck deep in bloody demon carcass, I’m quite the dapper guy.”
I laugh. “Yes, you are! Actually, you looked pretty good then too, but in an entirely different way…”
His gaze locks on mine, and we fall into a hushed silence. I feel myself growing warm as I remember the last time I was with him… kissing him, holding him. And him kissing me back with such tenderness, such longing. I had thought it was going to be the last thing I ever did. I never expected to actually see him again.
Not that I’m complaining.
But all this is so much to take in. Everything is changing – and fast. My whole world has exploded and is being rebuilt from the charred remains. Like a phoenix from the flames.
Maybe it’s time for a fresh start. A new beginning.
Vincent moves closer and reaches for my hand. “Hi,” he says, his voice low and intimate. His warmth travels from his hand right into my chest.
“Hi, yourself,” I whisper.
“It’s nice to see you again. It’s been far, far too long.”
“Tattie says I was only sleeping for five days. You really missed me, huh?” I nudge him playfully.
He clears his throat and looks at me. “Believe me, it’s been much longer than that. And yes, I did.”
I look up at him, not sure I under
stand, and he graces me with a rare smile. He gently places his hand on my abdomen. “How are the little ones doing?”
I feel an excited flutter in my belly and I laugh. “They’re great. I think they like you.”
He nods, his brown eyes sparkling. “Good… That’s good. I’m happy to see you’re okay. You’ve been through so much. How are you dealing with everything?”
I hear the sincerity in his voice. This isn’t just idle chit-chat. He genuinely cares. But the nearness of his body and the memory of our passionate kiss is almost more than I can stand. Still holding his hand, I lead him over to a fallen log next to a brook, and we sit down.
“It’s kind of strange…” I begin. “I’m not gonna lie. I mean, it was the hardest, most insane thing I’ve ever had to do. I truly thought I was going to disappear and be no more. But instead of dying, I became stronger than ever.”
Vincent nods. “I’m not gonna lie either… you had me really worried there for a bit!” He chuckles softly, and my skin hums and tingles some more. “I wasn’t sure what was going to happen. I’ve seen a lot in my day… a lot… but I’ve never met anyone who even remotely compares to you.”
I look away. “I’m kind of a drama case, huh?”
He puts his hand beneath my chin and gently guides my eyes back toward his. They twinkle, and he gives a little grin. “Nah. Nothing that I can’t handle.”
I catch my breath as suddenly the flurry of nerves returns. “You’re pretty amazing, you know that?” I say quietly. “I don’t know where you came from, or how I got so lucky to know you. But I need to say something to you, and I hope I won’t sound too crazy.”
Vincent chuckles again and raises his eyebrow. “Sweetheart, after all we’ve been though, I think the bar has been raised pretty high on the concept of ‘crazy’.”
I smile with him. “Good point. I guess… I guess what I want to say is, well, I remember us kissing, and I want to let you know that you’re off the hook if you want to be. I mean, we both thought that was kind of the end of the line for me, so I understand if you don’t—” I pause, searching for the right words.
“Don’t what? Want to do this?” Before I know it, his lips are on mine. My body reacts instinctively, and I pull him close. His arms are around me holding me tight, and in this moment I hope he never lets go. He feels so good. So right.
Finally we pull away. My lips tingle, and my skin feels warm and prickly. He looks in my eyes and brushes a loose strand of hair from my cheek. “Just so we’re perfectly clear and there’s no room for confusion, I want to be on the hook,” he murmurs. “Haven’t you realized yet that you are meant to be with me? I’ll follow you to the depths of Hell and back. And now that I’ve found you again, I am never letting you go.”
My head is delirious as he kisses me again.
But his words trigger a memory. When we finally come back up for air, I squeeze his hand and lean my head against his chest.
“You never told me how you did find me… found us.”
“Huh?”
My question has obviously caught him off guard.
I scoot back a little and look him in the eye. “Me and Corrine. How did you find us? First you and Demetri show up when we’re being held in the middle of God knows where. And later you show up in the Belith prison. I mean, it’s not like we were just right around the corner or something. Both places were heavily enchanted. Do you have other powers you haven’t told me about? Are you some special kind of powerful bounty hunter or something?”
He slowly shakes his head, and I feel my stomach begin to twist into knots as I realize he’s totally keeping something from me. Of course he is. I’ve always sensed he wasn’t being completely open with me. I just didn’t want to admit it.
“What is it? What are you not telling me?” I press. Better find out now before I get in any deeper. “No one else seemed to find us, but you could… why is that?”
When he still doesn’t answer, I stand up with my hands on my hips. “Look. I care about you and want to be with you. But I can’t do that if I can’t trust you. Please tell me what you’re holding back from me. Please. We need to be honest and real, or we can’t be anything.”
Vincent takes another deep breath. He stands up, his body mere inches from mine, and I can feel his tension.
He gazes down on me, his loving eyes deep and full of promise. Slowly he raises his hand to my face, and gently traces the side of my cheek, down to my neck. My pulse quickens and I catch my breath as his hand wraps around my Boumeaux.
“I found you because of this,” he whispers.
“My Boumeaux? What do you mean? It’s like a supernatural lo-jack or something?” Somehow I almost feel a little disappointed.
“It is to me.”
My breath catches in my throat, and suddenly my entire body is on fire.
“Why?” My voice is barely audible.
He leans closer, and I can feel his breath on my cheek.
“Say it,” I gasp.
“You already know,” he whispers.
I shake my head. I can’t even think it… I want it so badly… but it’s impossible. I can’t allow myself to believe. I can’t lose him twice.
“You have to say it,” I whisper, my voice trembling. Oh, God… please let him say it!
His breath warms my cheeks. “The reason I can always find you if you are wearing this, is because—“
I close my eyes.
“—I’m the one who gave it to you.”
Chapter 37.
Thank goodness Vincent has fast reflexes because that ground was coming up awful fast. He sits me back down on the log. “Are you okay?”
I stare at him. “I’m okay,” I murmur. “Just got a little dizzy.” Then I shake my head. “Actually, no. I’m not okay. I must be crazy… high-bar crazy.”
“You’re not crazy.”
Tears fill my eyes. “Bones gave me this.”
He doesn’t respond.
I look up at the sky as the tears fall freely down my cheeks. He gently turns my head and looks into my eyes. And I see it.
I see him.
“Yes,” he whispers.
I choke back a sob and throw my arms around him, burying my face in his neck. His powerful arms wrap around me, pulling me tight. The energy, the scent, the essence… all unmistakably Bones. How could I not have known?
I hold him, not wanting to let go, as I try to grasp the reality of it. Vincent is Bones. He is alive. He is here in my arms.
“But… you died. I saw you die!” I sob. I pull back to look at him again. It’s Vincent’s body, but all I see is Bones.
“Yes, that is true.” He frowns, and a shadow flits across his handsome face. “That form of me you knew as Bones was destroyed. Illegally, I might add.”
I wipe my tears and stare up at him, still stunned. “How are you here then? I’m so confused… did you hijack this guy’s body or something?”
He chuckles and shakes his head. “Nah… He’s all mine.”
“You need to explain this to me. Break it down, like I’m really, really stupid.”
He places his hand on mine. “You’re not stupid. Far from it. Your soul recognized me right away… I could feel it. But your mind rationalized it away as being impossible.”
“But how…?”
He clears his throat and sits up straighter. “Actually, I’ve had this form as a shifter for many centuries. But it was never of much use other than as the occasional messenger, which I already explained to you. In fact, I hadn’t even been able to access it for several decades. I spent all my time either being a Hellhound, or as Bones. That’s how it was supposed to stay. Forever.”
I let his words sink it. “But you never mentioned anything to me…”
He laughs. “With all due respect, love, there are a lot of things I haven’t mentioned to you. Remember, I’m a few millennia older than you are, so you’ll have to forgive me if there are some insignificant details that I don’t remember to share.”
>
“I wouldn’t call this insignificant!”
He cocks an eyebrow. “That’s true. I admit I was quite shocked to wake up in this form again after such a long time. Hellhounds are not designed to be in Guard mode full time unless assigned by the Legionare to do so. But I guess since my Bones body was destroyed, the only other option left was this one.”
I quickly check him out top to bottom. I would never have believed there could ever be a man as deliciously irresistible as Bones if I wasn’t sitting here staring at him right now.
“Nice back-up bod,” I mutter, and he smirks.
“Yeah? Ya like?” He flashes a movie star grin and raises an eyebrow suggestively.
“Oh, puhleeze!” I laugh and playfully hit his arm as he starts flexing his bicep. But my light mood quickly turns somber. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? You let me think you were dead. You let me mourn you.” I wipe away the tears again with the back of my hand, surprised to realize I actually feel some anger toward him right now. Thinking he was dead, and that it was all my fault had shredded me up inside.
He clenches his jaw and looks away. “I thought it was for the best,” he says quietly. “I always seemed to cause you such anguish, never being who, or what, you needed me to be. And with your condition, and only half of you loving me but both of you loving Kieron… I… I just thought I was doing the right thing. I thought you’d be happier with me out of the picture so you could just focus on him and have a happy life.”
I turn around and whap him on the arm again, hard this time. “Happy?! You think any part of me is ‘happier’ with you out of my life? Are you insane?! I love you, you idiot!” I whack his arm again and he grabs it, laughing.
“Okay, Okay… I’m sorry. Gee, I’d hate to see what you’d do if you didn’t like me.”
I stand up and stomp my foot on the ground. “Ugh! This is why I fell for Vincent so fast… why right away he was all I could think about. All I wanted. Even more than Kieron!”
He raises an eyebrow. “Oh, really? Tell me more…”