"You've been avoiding me."
Her eyes were sad. I felt like a douche. I shrugged.
"I've seen you around with a girl. A sorority bitch, by the looks of her. Is that who you threw me over for?"
"What's the point of talking about it?" I tried to step around her. "We're through. Let's leave it at that and part as friends."
"Friends?" She nearly snorted the word. "Is that what we are?" She grabbed my arm. "Friends answer texts and take each other's calls."
"Jordan, don't."
"Don't what?"
"Don't be desperate. You have your new life. New friends. I don't fit into it any more than you fit into mine."
"Is that what you think?" She looked genuinely stunned. "That you don't fit in my life?"
"It was pretty clear I didn't at that party."
"I said I was sorry." Her grip tightened. "We don't have to go to any more of my friends' parties. We've been together forever. We belong together."
"Is that why you slept with Zach? While we were still together. Because we belong together so much?" I shook her off and walked away.
"Who told you?" she screamed after me. "Zach?" She let loose a stream of threats and foul language. "I'll get you back, Dak. We belong together. Our breakups never last. This one won't, either!"
I kept walking.
Morgan
The new semester started off the second week in January with bitter, biting temperatures in the single digits and a chill factor below zero. My baby brother had been born the day after Christmas. He was a cute little thing. I hated to leave him, but I was glad to be back at school.
Seth moved out to live with Zach in his new apartment. Two new houseboys—babes, really—took their places. They were all awkward angles and gawking expressions, like they'd never seen so many hot chicks in all their lives. It was annoying. And sweet, in almost geeky way.
Breaking in new houseboys was the pits. It wasn't the same around the house without Zach and Seth. Paul and Dillon had their hands full bringing the new guys up to speed.
Fortunately, I was so busy I barely had time to notice. I was too happy. Dakota had made all the difference. Our birthdays were just a few weeks away. We were planning to have a party at the frat. With plenty of booze. Dak had already recruited a couple of seniors in his frat to buy it for us a few days ahead.
I had ordered a cake from the best bakery in town. In university colors. One half had the Tau Psi letters and Happy Birthday, Dakota on it. The other half had the Delta Delta Psi letters, Happy Birthday, Morgan, and flowers and bows and candy pearls. Two champagne glasses clinking met in the middle. I'd ordered us matching monogrammed champagne flutes. And we'd made a date for the Monday after to pick up our driver's licenses.
I'd gotten Dakota a jacket and sweater he was going to look so hot in. And as a special surprise, Dad had used his connections to get Dakota on as an alpha tester of the next big video game. It was the game everyone was going to want. They'd already spent several hundred million on its development. I could hardly wait to see his face when he found out.
Dakota had been hinting since Christmas that he had something special planned for my birthday. Something that involved jewelry. Since he'd given me a necklace for Christmas, and it was too soon to get engaged, I had fantasies of him lavaliering me. The Tau Psis both lavaliered and pinned. The order of a serious Greek relationship here went lavaliering, pinning, and finally engagement.
Two of the seniors in my house were pinned. Three were lavaliered. Two of them had been lavaliered at least twice. Lavaliering was a huge deal. The guy gave you a necklace with his house letters. It meant he valued you as much or more as his house and his fraternity brothers. Pinning was even more serious. He gave you either his own pin with his letters, or a special girlie version made just for pinning. Both pinning and lavaliering involved a special ceremony.
Both were public declarations of the guy's love before his house and hers. Very big stuff. Yes, it was early. Most of the time the couple had been dating a year or more. But we were already halfway through our junior year. And it was important to show everyone that he was over Alexis and I was over Zach. And we were serious about each other. No one took this kind of thing lightly.
Although we'd only been a couple a few months, we were each other's complete support. And we'd known each other from almost the first minute of our freshman year. Plus, how many people had the bond of almost running over the other one? I teased him about that.
A huge snowstorm hit on the first Thursday of class. We didn't get blizzards in the Pacific Northwest, but this was a complete whiteout, with blowing winds and the chill factor below zero.
I met Dakota for coffee at The College Grind, ducking in to get out of the wind before facing the icy hills of Greek Row. I wore my white coat with the fake fur collar, white boots with more faux fur trim, and white mittens.
He was waiting for me at a table, with his hands wrapped around a steaming cup of coffee and one waiting for me. He jumped up and kissed me, his lips hot with the promise of more body heat as he warmed my frigid blue lips.
"You look like the Snow Queen." He pulled my gloves from my icy hands, tossed them on the table, and rubbed my bare hands between his to warm them.
"Frozen, like I have a chip of ice in my heart?"
"No. Fucking beautiful."
I laughed. My phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out. "I'm amazed this thing still works in this cold. Good to know my smart phone is rated for below-zero temps." I glanced at the screen and couldn't help frowning. "It's Dad. I'd better get it."
Dak nodded as we both sat.
"Hey, Dad!" I tried to keep the tremble of fear out of my voice. My father didn't call just to chat. "What's up?"
There was a pause. "Sweetie…"
My heart stood still. He'd only spoken a single word. But I knew. Bad news.
"Grandma?" I could barely speak.
"I'm sorry." His voice broke with emotion. "She's had a major heart attack, honey. She has the best doctors. Don't get your hopes up. It's not looking good. Her heart is too weak. They don't expect…"
It was like if he didn't say the words, it wouldn't be real. But we both knew it was.
He took a deep breath. "They don't expect her to make it through the night. I'm trying to catch a flight out of Seattle to fly to see her. Nothing's flying into eastern Washington right now. I'll keep trying."
"Is anyone with her?" My heart pounded in my ears. Grandma lived about ninety miles away from the university. The rest of the family lived on the west side of the state, about three hundred miles away.
Dad paused a beat. "No. Your aunt left two days ago. Before any of this happened. No one expected…she was doing so well."
"She can't die alone!" I grabbed a napkin from the table and dabbed at my eyes and nose, trying to pretend the cold had made me a mess. I pictured Grandma alone in her room with no one there who loved her. She'd always been there for me.
"Don't get any ideas, Morgan. Stay where you are." Dad's voice was firm and worried. "I've seen the news. It's almost a blizzard over there. There's no bus service. The airport in that one-horse town is closed. So are half the roads."
"But Dad—"
"Stay put, honey. If anything happened to you… You're my baby. Stay safe and warm. I'll keep you posted." He hung up before I could argue.
I stared at Dakota and tried not to cry as I grabbed my gloves. "I have to go." I was going no matter what Dad had said.
Dakota swore and pulled his coat off the back of his chair. "Not alone."
"What?" I stared at him with wide eyes.
"I overheard your conversation. Sorry. Your grandma, right? You have to go see her. You'll never forgive yourself if you don't. I'm taking you."
"But you can't drive. If they catch you, they'll revoke your deferral and put you in jail."
"Put the sobriety buddy shit aside, Morgan." He stared me down. "You're planning on driving, aren't you? You're in the same shitty situatio
n I am."
"She's my grandma. I love her more than almost anyone in the world." Meaning him. "It's worth the risk to me. But I can't let you take the chance."
"Like hell will I let you go alone. You're too upset to drive, especially in this crap. My car's got snow tires and all-wheel drive. No arguments. I'm taking you." He took my arm. "Let's go."
There's a time to argue. And a time to give in. As much as it scared me, I needed him. I felt safer with him.
We bundled up and slipped and slid our way through the blowing snow to the frat. He tossed a sleeping bag into the backseat along with some bottles of water.
"I have an emergency kit with flares, hand warmers, and space blankets." He grabbed his ice scraper and brush and began clearing the car.
Like I cared or had even thought about that. Hurry, hurry, hurry! That was all that ran through my mind, over and over again in a continuous loop of fear.
He jumped in and started the car to get it warming up. By the time he'd finished dusting off the entire car, snow was already accumulating again on the roof.
We jumped in and buckled up. Greek Row sat at the top of the hill with the university. The roads out of it toward the edge of town and the freeway were all treacherously steep. Fortunately, the snow was light, and very cold. It wasn't slick, but visibility was practically nil.
We drove in silence toward the highway out of town, Dak concentrating on the road. Several of the roads down from Greek Row were already closed. We had to turn around twice. When we finally reached the highway, it was closed, too.
"I know a back way. It runs parallel to the highway, through a bunch of tiny towns. I was routed through it once when there was a fatality blocking the highway."
Fatality. That was not what I needed to hear.
He carefully swung the car around. "It will take longer, but I doubt they've closed it yet."
He crawled through town. He was right. It was still open. The truckers had thought of it, too. We got behind a semi. Dak stayed close on its tail. Even still, its lights were barely visible in the ever-darkening storm.
"I hope to hell it doesn't jackknife." His gaze was fierce.
I squinted, but couldn't see the road. "This is insane."
He nodded. Up ahead, we caught a glimpse now and then of a car or truck ahead of the one we were following.
"I hope the lead car, wherever it is, can see where it's going." I bit my lip. "And that we're not driving across wheat fields instead of roads."
His gaze didn't leave the road. "I hope so, too." He handed me his phone. "Put some music on, will you?"
I plugged it in. "What do you want—smooth and calming? Or loud and screaming?" He liked screamo and hard rock.
He named a band. I brought it up. We rode without speaking, listening to his music as the miles inched along. I put my hand on his arm. His muscles were taut and tense.
The truck ahead of us slowed as we crawled up a hill. Dak downshifted, cursing beneath his breath as the car fishtailed. "Black ice? What the hell? It should be too damn cold for that. Why hasn't it dried up? If that truck stops, we'll never get going again."
I said a silent prayer. The truck kept inching forward. We reached the top of the hill and picked up speed.
I let out a sigh of relief. "There's no one else I'd rather be stuck in a snowstorm with. Just so you know."
It broke the tension just enough. He actually grinned. "It would be fun staying warm with you."
The two-hour drive stretched into three. We finally merged back with the highway, but we hadn't reached the divided road. Everything was white. I had no idea how far away we were.
I just wanted to be there. This couldn't all be for nothing. If Grandma died before we reached her…
Dak snapped off the music. "We'll make it in time, Morgs. Keep believing that."
It was like he'd read my mind. "Yes," I said, like he was right. Because I had to believe. "Let's think of something happy." Suddenly, I was Little Miss Sunshine. Because if I thought of anything sad, or scary, I was going to lose it.
"Like what?"
"Like our birthdays."
"Our birthdays?" He grinned again.
"Yeah. What do you have planned for me?"
"Like I'm going to tell you. What do you have planned for me?"
"Something that will show you how much I love you." I covered his hand, which rested on the gearshift, with mine.
"That's exactly what I have planned for you." He paused.
"How much do you love me?" I said.
"I'm driving through a snowstorm for you."
I smiled. "I know that. But am I more important to you than your frat brothers?"
He smiled as he studied the road. "You're more important to me than anyone else. Now stop prying." He paused, and then casually said, "Do you like pink roses?"
A pink rose on the table at dinner in the sorority was a sign that a girl was going to be lavaliered.
"Love them. What are you implying?"
"Nothing. I'm not implying anything. Just that, maybe, a birthday run won't be the most important thing on your mind that day."
The truck in front of us geared down and pulled toward the right. That was when I saw the flash of police lights.
"Shit!" Dak geared down and swore beneath his breath. "The cops are pulling everyone over."
Chapter Twenty
Morgan
My heart beat so hard, it threatened to pound right out of my chest as Dak pulled to a stop.
"What are we going to do?" I whispered. "If they ask to see your license—"
Dak rolled down his window.
A cop stuck his head in. "We're closing the road. Where are you headed?"
"To the hospital." Dak's voice was confident. Polite. Totally respectful. "This is going to sound like a smartass excuse, sir. But it's the absolute truth. We're on our way to see her dying grandma." He nodded toward me.
I teared up. It wasn't faked.
Dak winced and gave me an apologetic look before returning his attention to the cop. "We got a call this morning that she might not last through the night. We're trying to make it before it's too late. You can check with them if you like." He sounded completely sincere.
I let out a gasp of pain and sorrow, sniffed, and dabbed at my eyes. "Please." I held my breath.
The cop looked thoughtful for a moment as he studied us. "All right. Take it slow." He pulled his head back out of the window and waved us on.
I let out a sigh of relief and started shaking.
Dak grabbed my hand. His touch steadied me. "It's all right. I love you. We're at the divided highway. We're almost there."
I nodded.
The drive should have taken another half-hour. It took an hour and a half before Dak pulled into the hospital parking garage. We jumped out of the car. He took my hand and beeped the car locked.
"You okay?" He squeezed my hand.
I nodded, but I was a mess.
We found the cardiac wing and asked for my grandma. I nearly collapsed into Dak's arms when they said she was in ICU.
"She's not dead," I whispered to myself as much as Dak. "We made it in time." I clutched his arm. He was my hero.
I had to show ID to prove I was indeed family. All I had was my student ID. Thankfully, no one asked any questions about why I didn't have my license with me.
They refused to let Dak into the room with me with the excuse that only family, and only one person at a time, was allowed. I would have pushed it, but I was sure they'd ask for his ID. We didn't need more questions. And he wasn't family.
Dak squeezed my hand again and gave me a light kiss on the lips. "I'll be right here, waiting." He left "as long as it takes" unsaid.
I nodded and followed the nurse alone toward Grandma's room, looking back over my shoulder just before we turned a corner out of sight. The sight of him gave me courage. I couldn't believe we'd made it.
Inside, Grandma's room sounded like the machinery of hospitals and a fight for life. Th
e rhythmic pumping of a respirator. The beeps of a heart monitor. The electronic pulse of a half-dozen machines. The drip of an IV. She was behind a curtain that slid on metal rings.
The nurse held the curtain aside for me without looking, and disappeared to give me privacy as I stepped behind the curtain.
My grandmother was hooked to every possible machine. The beating of her heart looked weak even to my eyes as it pulsed on the monitor. She gasped and struggled for each breath as a machine breathed for her.
Her blankets and sheets had slipped back. Her hospital gown was open in the front, revealing flat, old, sagging breasts. Exposing her in a way that would have petrified her. That upset me.
I took a quick step to her bed and gently pulled her gown together and pulled her sheet up to make her modest again, to preserve her dignity. I didn't speak or give myself away for a minute. She didn't stir or acknowledge me. She wasn't conscious. But I didn't take a chance.
I took a step back, hoping to make it seem like I'd been a nurse doing my duty. I took a deep breath and tried my approach again, sitting in the chair next to the bed and taking her cool hand.
"It's me." I clasped her hand gently between mine. My hand was cold, but warmer than hers. Her veins stood out in her pale hands, blue, like they were gasping for oxygen and life, too. "Morgan." I bit my lip. "I'm so glad you hung on and waited for me." Tears welled in my eyes.
"I came through a snowstorm like the one I was born in. Remember the stories you told about flying through a rare Seattle snowstorm to come to the hospital to see me be born?" And now I was coming to see her die. Snowstorms. Bookends on life.
I kept those thoughts to myself.
"I love you, Grandma. You've always been my rock. I'm trying to be like you. I promise I'll keep on trying and make you proud. And tell my baby brother all about you and what a wonderful grandma you are."
She didn't stir. Tears filled my eyes. I had no idea if she heard me.
It's hard to talk to a person who doesn't respond. I babbled about nothing and everything. About how Dad was trying to get here.