And she walked away.
27
Back at home, she found herself in her kitchen, rolling out dough, sucking down coffee and moving a little slow because both men’s loving attention had left her sore. She smiled at that.
It was good, she realized as she sat on the plane on the way back, to just say it. All the stuff she’d shoved away because it was family and she hadn’t wanted to rock the boat had only been clogging up her life. She didn’t take shit from anyone else in her life, why should she from people she barely knew anymore, or who should have known better?
It was a new era for Jules on many different fronts. She and Gideon had needed that night back in the hotel room. They’d cleared the air and she felt as if she understood him a lot better afterward. Hell, she understood herself better too.
They’d be helping Patrick move into the apartment at the farmhouse that upcoming weekend. Cal had already put his house on the market, never being one to sit around once he’d made his mind up.
She had to call her landlord later that day to see if he’d let her out of her lease early. She’d been a tenant for years; hopefully he’d cut her a break.
Her phone rang and because it was not even five in the morning, she checked the caller ID and saw it was her mother of all people. She paused a moment. Did she want to do this?
She sighed and picked it up.
“Hello?”
“Jules, it’s your mother. I’ve just had a phone call from Ethan. Do you want to explain to me why you’ve refused to share information about your father?”
Her nervousness washed aside, replaced by anger. “Are you telling me you’re calling me about some business between me and Ethan?”
“You can’t just refuse to talk with him about John’s illness. That’s selfish, Juliet; you should know better.”
“Mother, you’ve picked the wrong day to do this. Take a step back. First of all, not that I owe you an explanation, but I’m not even in L.A. anymore. I’m back home. I’ve been back four days. If Ethan wants an update, he can call Donna. Marci knows why I stopped calling to update Ethan. And so does Ethan. Why he’d call you about it I don’t know.”
“What do you mean you left? He’s still in ICU and you left?”
She slammed her hand down on the counter. “I told you you picked the wrong day. I gave you a warning. Yes, I left. For my own reasons. Why do you care anyway?”
“That’s your father. We didn’t raise you to choose your friends over your family. I’m disappointed in you.”
“You’re disappointed in me? Really? Does the irony of calling me from Italy instead of from your son’s home miss you? Remember Connor’s birthday? Remember choosing to swan off to Italy instead of fulfilling a promise to your family? Yeah, so really, if you want to call me out, you’d better come at me from a much better position because I’m all about some truth today. Want to keep going?”
“What’s gotten into you?”
“You know, I don’t take guff from anyone. In my day-to-day life I’m a strong woman who knows what she wants and goes after it. Except from my family. Which seems silly to me. I’m equalizing that. Now it’s my resolution not to take anything from anyone. Including you. Including my father or his wife. I don’t owe you explanations. You gave up that right when you just fell off the face of the planet and call me to tell me I was a waste of your life and to yell at me over some crap you don’t know a thing about.”
“I had no idea you felt this way.”
“You should have known it. You’re my mother. But I’m telling you now. I love you and I wish you the best. I want you to find whatever it is you’ve been missing. But I’m not a friend from high school you connect with every few months when you’re feeling lonely or you need someone else to deliver news you don’t have the guts to deliver yourself. The days of Jules running everyone’s crappy errands are over. The days of me silently taking it are over. Now, if you’re done yelling at me over something you don’t understand, I have a business to run. By the way, I’m going to start using the apartment over Tart as business offices. That way you won’t have to come back here because you feel like you have to.”
“You’ve clearly been bothered by things for a while.”
“I have. And it’s not entirely fair for me to dump this all on you at once out of the blue.”
Jules poured herself more coffee and then went back to fluting the edges of the tart dough.
“I used to have a mother who listened to me. Who liked being around me. Who I could talk to about most anything. I don’t have her anymore and it breaks my heart. But I accept that you have a new direction. I can adapt, but you can’t have it both ways. I’m not giving you a pass anymore.”
Her mother was silent for long moments. “I don’t think you or Ethan are wastes of my life. I’m sorry I said that. I’m sorry you’ve been hurting and I didn’t look close enough to see it.”
“I accept your apology. I’m sorry you’re so sad and I wish I could make it better for you. But you don’t need John anymore. He’s regressed as a person. He’s better off with Donna.”
Her mother laughed. “There’s a story with that one, I can tell.”
“There is, but it doesn’t need to be told because you don’t need it. He’s not yours anymore. Not your problem, not your burden. He’s not a nice person. He’s someone else’s husband and someone else’s father and he doesn’t want any of us. And in the end, though it hurts, we’re better off because he’s not a real man.”
“He isn’t. But he was my man for thirty years. It’s hard to be something for so long and then not anymore.”
“I bet.”
“Do you hate me?”
Jules snorted. “No. I love you. I miss you. I’m telling you to find your own path because I love you. But your self-imposed distance hurts. I can’t lie about that and I don’t want to. Our relationship has to change for me to be in it and not resent you.”
“All right. I’d like it very much if you and I could meet somewhere. To visit and talk. We’ve got a lot to talk about.”
“I can’t go to Italy right now. I have . . . so much going on. Speaking of that, since I’m being honest and all, I’m in a relationship. It’s not conventional, but I’m happy and it’s good.”
“You’re a lesbian?”
She laughed. “No. I’m with two men. Cal Whaley and Gideon Carter. We’re moving in together in a few weeks.”
“Wow. Really? Two? And Cal looks just like his dad, which is a good thing because he’s a handsome man. Two. I’m impressed.”
“You are?” Relief washed through her.
“Juliet, I’ve made a lot of mistakes. I wasn’t brave when I needed to be and I hurt you. I just needed to be away, I guess. But I took too long. I don’t wish for you to be unhappy. If these two men make you happy, what’s it to me that there are two instead of one?”
“I wish Ethan felt the same.”
“Well take it from me, you can’t live for other people’s expectations. It never works. I can’t . . . I can’t be the woman I was before. I don’t know if she’s even inside me anymore. But I’d like to be who I am now and have a relationship with you. I’m coming back to the States in two months. Your aunt has some business she needs to deal with at home. Will you meet me in Chicago then? We can hit the city. Do some shopping. And talk.”
“All right.” She only hoped her mother kept the promise.
If she didn’t, Jules would walk away once and for all.
• • •
Cal was waiting for her in the alley when she came out after work. He leaned against his pretty sports car, looking long and lean and handsome.
“Honestly, Calvin Whaley, can you stop being so delicious for a few minutes and give a girl a chance to breathe?”
He smiled but he was up to something, she could see it.
“Gideon called. He’s going to be late coming back tonight. So how about you and I have a quiet night in? I’ve cleared my calendar and have turne
d off my phone.”
“Will there be sex? Because I insist that if I make you dinner, you have sex with me.”
“I think we can manage that, yes.”
“I’ll be at your place in forty-five minutes or so. I have to run home first.”
He kissed her hard. “Wear that navy blue skirt I like so much.”
“Who am I to refuse you?”
“Exactly, Jules. Just remember that.”
• • •
Cal waited for her at his house. He poured them both a glass of wine as he checked on the prawns marinating in the fridge. He had her all to himself for a while and he wanted to take advantage of that.
She’d been . . . different since they got back from L.A. She always had been a confident person, but it was as if standing up for herself had thrown the doors wide open. She worked hard on putting the stuff with her family away. He believed she needed to confront her brother and mother, but that needed to come on her time and no one else’s.
He put on some music and settled in to wait. But it wasn’t very long until she showed up. Ever punctual, was his Juliet.
And she had a pastry box. Score.
“What’d you bring me?” He sidled up to her as she laughed.
“Nothing fancy. Just an apple cranberry tart. I heard someone I know liked them.”
He peeked at the masterpiece she referred to as nothing fancy. “Looks pretty fancy to me. Almost as tasty to eat as you.”
She blushed. “You’re in a mood.”
“I am. You make me that way. I poured you a glass of wine. The shrimp is marinating. Let’s give it another half an hour or so. I picked up fresh ginger today so I want it to really get in there.”
She sipped the wine. “Hits the spot.” And then she told him about the call with her mother.
“Look at you, Jules. Grabbing all sorts of bulls by the horns and handing out Come-to-Jesus talks right and left. Sounds hopeful though.”
She shrugged. “I think so. But I can’t afford to totally trust it. I figure if I keep my expectations low she won’t disappoint me. And if she does what she’s supposed to, it’s a big plus.”
“I can’t believe your shit of a brother called to tattle on you.”
“He’s being a dick. I can’t fix that either. I can only refuse to let it in my life. Maybe one day he’ll get his act together. I wanted to thank you.” She put her wine down and walked to the windows to look out.
“For what?” He moved to stand behind her, his chin on her shoulder, arms around her waist.
“For being there. I was wrong to leave without talking to you both first. I told you on the phone and I told Gideon. But I needed to say it to you again. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust you, but I needed to fix it. To make it better and I just went into that mode. I should have turned to you first.”
“I hated that you were alone for part of it. I hated that I wasn’t there to hold you and protect you from whatever was going to happen. I know . . . I know it’s hard for you to trust me. But I’m trying to prove myself to you.”
She breathed in deep. “It’s not hard to trust you at all. I’ve trusted you since we were kids. I’m sorry I made you feel that way.”
“I’ve been with other people when I should have been with you.”
She laughed then, putting her arms over his, leaning back into him. “We’re dumb. Cal, you were with other people and you had a life before we got together, yes. But you shouldn’t be sorry for that. I never wanted you to be unhappy. I just wanted you to be happy with me instead of Tom, Susie or Harry.”
“I see what you did there.” He kissed her cheek. “I don’t want to fuck it up. You’re the best thing in my life and I want to do right by you.”
“You do. That’s what I’m saying. I was the wrong one for not talking to you guys, not the other way around.”
“None of them, the ones before, were near what we are. Do you understand that?”
“I do. You show me that every day.”
“None of them ever had a key. I never wanted to pick out paint with any of them.”
“Cal, you don’t want to pick out paint with me either.”
He laughed. “You’re right. But that’s about the tedious process of paint choosing, not the person choosing it. And while we’re being so honest and all, are you still worried about me leaving you for Gideon?”
“I told you it was a stupid fear. A small stupid fear I had back at the start. I don’t have that fear anymore.”
“Good. I hated that you’d ever think that. I wouldn’t. Not ever. I do love Gideon. But you’re my heart, Jules. You’re mine in a way no one else could ever be and while I do love that pussy of yours, the choice has nothing to do with your plumbing being indoor.”
“You’re so poetic.”
“I am!” He stole a kiss. “You’re with us then. All three of us.”
“Yes. I’ve never been anyone else’s. Surely you know that.”
“I guess I did, but it can’t hurt to hear it.”
“I love you. Not just because you’re handsome and well dressed. Not just because you make me dinner and seem to really enjoy eating pussy. There’s no one else like you. No one else knows me the way you do.”
He kissed her temple. “We’re good now.” It wasn’t a question.
“We totally are.”
“Glad you wore that skirt. You know I love it.”
He pressed his cock into the luscious flesh of her ass.
“I do. Why is that? You really like blue, is that it?”
“It makes your legs look long and gorgeous.”
She arched into him as he slid his palms down her thighs. He reversed, pulling the hem of the skirt up as he did. “It’s short enough for me to get at your cunt whenever I want.”
She was his to tease. She leaned back, affording him a great view in the glass of the window.
He let the skirt go, skimming his hands up her belly, to the hem of her shirt and he pulled it apart, sending her buttons flying. She gasped and the sound licked along his senses. Enticing.
She braced herself, palms to the window, watching him in the reflection of the glass, watching his hands on her breasts. Watching as he peeled the cups of her bra back, exposing her breasts.
He paused to admire them as he tugged and rolled her nipples until she made low, needy sounds.
“If you were my camp counselor, would you have kissed me?”
He groaned. “Yes. I shouldn’t have kissed you the first time. You were my sister’s friend. So young. God. But I had to. I couldn’t bear the thought of any dumbass college dude kissing you.”
“Fuck me.” She paused, meeting his gaze in their reflection. “No one else is around. I won’t tell.” Her mouth tipped up on one side.
“Pull your skirt up for me. And be very quiet. We don’t want anyone to hear us or I could get sent home from camp.”
Her nipples hardened as he ground himself against her from behind. He slid his hand down the front of her panties and she widened her stance, giving him better access.
“I’ll make it good for you. I promise.”
She gasped as he slid her clit between thumb and forefinger, plumping it ever so gently. “Will it hurt?” She reached around and cupped his cock through his pants. “You feel so big.”
Christ, she was going to kill him with this game.
He thrust into her hand. “Will you kiss it? After I make you come. You need to be ready first.”
He fingered her pussy, watching her face in the window, knowing she was close as she made sounds low in her throat and began to roll her hips, stroking her cunt on his hand to get what she wanted.
“Yes, take what you want from me,” he murmured in her ear as she gasped and came in a hot rush all over his fingers.
“Touch it,” he said as he spun her and backed her to the nearby doorway. He planned to fuck the hell out of her and didn’t want to break a damned window doing it.
She unbuttoned and unzipped his pants a
nd pulled his cock out. Sending him a coy look through her lashes, she licked her lips. “Like this?” She gripped him, pumping her hand up and down a few times.
“Mmm, yes. Do you want to kiss it?”
“Really?” She fluttered her lashes.
“On your knees. Just a little kiss. You can stop if you don’t like it.”
She caught her bottom lip between her teeth for a moment before going to her knees. The first lick was a tease, but then she sucked the head of him into her mouth lightly, keeping him wet. No high school girl he’d ever met knew how to suck cock like that, though.
“Yes, god, yes, that’s it. Touch my balls.”
She looked up at him as she reached back to touch his sac, dragging her nails over him, sending a shiver up his thighs.
“For your first time, you’re pretty good at this.”
She pulled off his cock with a pop. “I’m an honors student.”
She went back to work, taking him deep, all pretense dropped. She pushed him closer and closer to the edge until he grabbed her by the upper arms and hauled her to stand.
He stumbled back, resting his weight on the arm of the couch. He held his cock just so and she backed up, sliding her cunt down over him, sending him a thousandth of a second away from blowing.
“Hands at the small of your back.”
She did and he grabbed her wrists, holding her exactly how he wanted as he levered himself into a position where he could control the thrusts.
In the windows, the sun had begun to set and they were reflected, her skirt up high, blouse hanging open, her breasts exposed as he fucked her.
“No one else has ever come close to making me feel the way you do.”
She sucked in a breath. “I’d totally have let you get to third base, Calvin.”
He laughed even as he groaned when she tightened around him.