‘Tomas will come down,’ she said, giving a small sigh. ‘Angelica, tell Juliet that Tomas will be down directly.’
This information proved inexact; Tomas Court did come downstairs—but he did so one hour later.
‘Would you mind not smoking?’ he said in a polite way to Juliet, moving across the white room and opening the window. ‘Angelica brought you coffee? Good. Now—how can I help you?’
Juliet slowly turned her azure eyes upon him. Angelica had said nothing of his presence in the apartment—her motive no doubt malice. Tomas Court’s arrival came as a complete surprise to her. Having met him in person only once before, at the Foxe party the previous evening, Juliet now saw the necessity for examining him a great deal more closely. She measured his height and build; she noted that he had calculated—and she was sure of the calculation—that his appearance would impart its own message. His demeanour was that of the husband, at ease in a familiar home; it was also—and markedly so—that of the lover.
He was dressed in the manner of a man who had thrown on his clothes in haste. He was unshaven, and as he moved past her, she realized he was also unwashed. A faint but unmistakable scent reached her nostrils; she understood that he had been careful to come downstairs with the smell of sex still on his body.
She felt jealousy and pain at once. Seeing he was watching her face for just such a reaction, she gave him none.
‘You can’t help me,’ she replied coldly. ‘I want to see Natasha. Does she know I’m here?’
‘Yes, I’m afraid she does.’
‘Well, I’m afraid I’ll just have to wait until she’s ready to see me.’
‘As you wish,’ he replied quietly.
Juliet’s mouth tightened. That brief exchange told her a great deal—not least that Tomas Court now knew of her relationship with Natasha. It had not taken him long to extract that confession, she thought; then she realized that, in a polite way, he had also rebuked her.
‘I came when I saw the news on TV,’ she said at once. ‘I wanted to say—I am very sorry for you both. It was a terrible thing…’
‘Terrible things happen.’
‘Is your son recovering?’
‘I hope so. He is sleeping now. The doctor will be calling in again later. He wasn’t physically harmed, apart from a small cut. But the shock—you can imagine…’
He paused, then, as if coming to a decision, sat down opposite her on the white couch; Juliet wondered if he knew it was a couch she had chosen.
‘I think it will be very good for Jonathan to get away from this place,’ he continued, in a deliberate way. ‘I’m sure it will help him to spend the next three months in England. Natasha too, obviously…’
Not a man who wasted time, Juliet thought—and that remark had been a throwing down of the gauntlet.
‘I’m sure,’ she replied, in a cool way. ‘You’ve decided not to postpone then?’
‘I shan’t alter my plans.’
‘Really? I’d have thought Natasha might need time to recover.’
‘Natasha is resilient. Very.’
Juliet flushed. She could hear the warning in that quiet remark; it was meant to suggest a more intimate knowledge of Natasha than her own, and that angered her. Meeting his gaze squarely, she said, ‘Are you flaunting something? It isn’t necessary. I always knew that Natasha would be away with you for three months while you made this movie. I’m prepared for that.’
‘Are you?’
His expression, to her surprise, became one of sympathy. He rose and began to move about the room. He reached out and straightened a picture. His manner, Juliet noted, remained calm and considering.
‘It’s a very good part for Natasha,’ he remarked, after some minutes of silence. ‘Tell me, did she show you my script?’
‘No,’ Juliet replied, knowing he would see this as an admission of weakness. ‘I have read the novel, however, and I wouldn’t share your view about Natasha’s part. I disliked this Helen Huntingdon she’s going to play. A pious, possessive, masochistic woman.’
‘I agree, particularly as the novel progresses. There’s an irresolution on the author’s part, I feel. She gives us glimpses of a far more interesting woman. She placates the conventions of her time, while also challenging them.’ He gave her a somewhat bored glance. ‘In any case, the novel is an irrelevance really. I do not make adaptations. I dislike the Brontë output on the whole, with the exception of one novel—not this one, as it happens—and I have never subscribed to all that hysterical Brontë worship. Emily excepted, the Brontës wrote women’s novels.’
‘I certainly hope so,’ said Juliet.
‘My script bears little relation to the novel, in any case. I’ve made drastic changes. I’ve altered the end completely…’
‘Have you also altered the husband’s part?’ Juliet put in, coldly. ‘I’m sure you’ll have made that a great deal more sympathetic.’
‘I’ve ensured it’s played by a great actor.’ He gave a shrug. ‘That will make a difference, of course. And yes, the character is certainly changed. As to sympathy—I’m not interested in evoking sympathy. That is always easy to do—quickly and cheaply.’
‘How very arrogant you are.’ Juliet rose. ‘I knew you would be, of course. I detest men like you. Why didn’t you bother to wash before you came downstairs? I don’t smell victory, if that’s what you’re hoping. Conquest, possibly. I’d rather wait here alone, if you don’t mind.’
‘That is your prerogative.’
He turned his pale steady gaze upon her. Again Juliet had the disconcerting feeling that the only emotions he felt for her were curiosity and sympathy. His refusal to betray the least indication of anger, uncertainty or jealousy enraged her, she found.
‘May I say something, though, before I go? You may feel that you know my wife—’
‘I know that I know her, and she is not your wife; you should remember that she’s your ex-wife.’
‘I never think of her in that way. If you asked Natasha, I suspect she would tell you that she never thinks of me as her ex-husband, either. Never mind that. Were you ever married?’
‘Yes, once.’
‘Then you will know, every marriage is a secret shared by two people. It’s unwise for any outsider to assume they know that secret. I’d prefer you to be spared the ordeal of a long humiliating wait, so I’d suggest, for your own sake, that you leave here now.’
‘I’ll wait until Natasha asks me to leave. This is her apartment, not yours.’
‘As you wish.’ He gave a sigh. ‘She won’t come down, you know.’
‘I don’t believe that. She wouldn’t do that—’
‘I think you’ll find that she will.’
He spoke quietly and with total certainty. So authoritative was his tone that Juliet, for the first time, felt doubt. Instantly, she was less composed; her voice rose as she replied, and she regretted this, but could not prevent it.
‘If Natasha does not come down,’ she said, ‘it will be because you are here. You’re obsessed with controlling her. You aren’t satisfied with controlling her work, you have to control her life as well. She’s frightened of you. You bully her.’
‘Is that what you think?’ He looked surprised. ‘I thought you were more intelligent. Don’t you find that scenario a little glib? Simplistic? Is Natasha really such a poor thing? I don’t believe so.’ He paused. ‘I begin to see—you don’t really know her at all, do you? Have you ever seen Natasha when she’s working?’
‘I’ve seen her on stage, yes. Many times.’
‘That wasn’t really what I meant; then you’re watching a finished performance. If you had watched Natasha put that performance together, piece by piece…’ He gave her a steady look. ‘Working with my wife is a very interesting process. Her approach is the very opposite of my own. She is oblique, timid, instinctual, and emotional; I am none of those things. She swerves in on her target, whereas I track it in a controlled, planned way. Yet she hits that target, time after
time after time…’ He paused. ‘So I have come to see, Natasha’s attack is every bit as carefully planned as my own—but being a woman, she prefers to disguise that. On set, obviously, I give Natasha direction. I can assure you, on set and off, she submits to direction only if she wants to do so. And sometimes she contrives it so that the direction I give her is the direction she has been secretly desiring.’
There was a silence. Juliet met that pale gaze. She did not like the information he was giving her, and she did not like that word ‘submit’, either. She suspected he had intended it to cause a specific unease—and if so, he had succeeded.
As she stood looking at him, weighing the implications of his words, she became aware, for the first time, of the background noises in the room, the clickings, creakings and shiftings which, in her experience, were always to be sensed at the Conrad. A radiator made a faint sound; a voice filtered into the room from the stairs. It was born in on her, with sudden force, that a woman had been killed in this building the previous night.’
She found herself looking at Tomas Court’s hands; her throat had become dry; he had strong square hands, of some beauty. Suddenly, information rushed at her. She had been telling herself that Court’s presence here could be explained, that if he had been admitted to Natasha’s room now, it was because, after the night’s events, she was afraid and desperate for consolation or protection. Now she saw that supposition was wrong; she knew it with every instinct in her body. Court’s sexual reunion with his wife had another explanation—and it was one she had no wish to examine.
‘It’s a little hot in here, don’t you find?’ he said.
‘A little, yes,’ Juliet replied, moving further away from him.
‘I’ll ask Angelica to turn down the thermostat.’
He removed his jacket as he said this, and rolled back his shirtsleeves. Juliet saw—and knew he intended her to see—that he had a scratch on his inner arm. He had read her mind, Juliet thought, and he was now answering an unspoken question. She looked at the scratch, which ran from elbow to wrist. Since she had a similar scratch on her own back, she knew precisely who had made it and in exactly what circumstances.
‘You’ve injured yourself,’ she said.
‘The injury was not self-inflicted.’
‘Your marriage is over,’ she said, paling with anger. ‘It was over before you divorced. It’s finished.’
‘You would want to believe that, of course.’ He paused; for the first and only time she saw his equilibrium threatened. ‘I wouldn’t deny there’s been pain in my marriage. Considerable pain is involved—and that pain is mutual.’
‘I’m not discussing pain—of any sort—with you,’ Juliet said sharply. She moved further away. ‘I’m aware of your interest in the subject. It’s apparent—only too apparent—in every one of your damned movies.’
‘True, true.’ He gave her a pale glance. ‘But I do at least avoid the banalities of pain, you know. Give me credit for that. You won’t find whips or masks in any of my movies. That kind of tawdry game doesn’t interest me remotely…’ He paused. ‘Nor, in case you’re wondering, does it interest Natasha.’
He bent and picked up his jacket. Juliet, uneasy and distressed, looked at him with loathing. He was intensely male, she found; the fact that even she was aware of his sexuality made her violently angry. She was beginning to see that Natasha might desire and fear this man—or desire him because she feared him. That idea sickened her; of that need, Natasha could be cured, she told herself. Giving Court a glance of defiance, she returned to her chair and sat down again. This, she was glad to see, annoyed him.
‘Shall I tell you why you’re wasting your time here?’ he said, ‘and why my wife will not come down to see you, however long you wait?’
‘Natasha will come down. She loves me.’
‘Perhaps, to an extent. There is one requirement, however—and in your case, it’s missing.’
Juliet gave him a look of disbelief and scorn.
‘Oh, please,’ she said, ‘don’t tell me you’re that stupid. Believe me, that particular lack is an advantage, as Natasha has often told me.’
‘Has she? Well, my wife will always try to be gentle, but I’m afraid you misunderstand.’ He paused. ‘There is one difference between you and me, and it has nothing to do with gender. You cannot hurt Natasha, you see, whereas I can. And my wife retains the ability to hurt me. She is the only woman who has ever had that ability—and don’t smile, no man has it either.’
‘I wasn’t smiling. I don’t view the ability to cause pain as a distinction.’
‘Then we differ.’ He gave her a quiet glance. ‘And now, if you’ll forgive me, I have to work. I’m going down to my loft in TriBeCa. You’re sure you won’t let me see you out, drop you off somewhere?’
‘No. And I find it astonishing you can even consider working at such a time—’
‘Oh, I can always work.’ His pale eyes rested steadily on her face. ‘No matter the circumstances. The work, ultimately, is the only thing of any importance.’
‘Another male boast.’ Juliet returned his look coldly. ‘If your son had died last night, would you be working this morning?’
‘No.’ His gaze moved away from hers and came to rest on the blank wall opposite. ‘But next week I should have worked, or the week after.’
His tone reproached Juliet, who at once regretted her remark.
‘That wouldn’t be true of Natasha,’ she said slowly, considering him. ‘If anything happened to Jonathan it would destroy her.’
‘I think so too. I expect that is the one difference between us.’ He paused. ‘Now I must go. I’m glad to have met you.’
With that—and Juliet sensed he meant his final remark—he left. Still angry and discomposed, she remained in the room. She sat there for four hours, trying to understand the information she had been given, and the information she was certain he had withheld.
Several times she rose to her feet, intent on going upstairs and confronting Natasha. Each time, realizing that such a confrontation at such a moment was unthinkable, she sat down again. As Tomas Court had predicted, she began to feel a pained humiliation. When she could endure that no longer, she left.
She called many times over the following weekend, to find all calls fielded by a machine or a surly Angelica. Not one of her calls was returned and, subsequently, not one of her letters was answered.
She suffered, but less than she would have done when younger, she told herself. Refusing to speculate any further on the nature of the bond that held Court and Natasha together, it came to be her view that Natasha had accepted her husband’s aegis—an error fatal in its consequences, she believed, and one made by too many women. She wrote no more letters, and in this way, with many questions left unresolved, she came to accept that the Conrad chapters of her life, as she now thought of them, were over.
Being a resilient woman, she determined not to look back, but to close the book on the entire episode; in her experience, such ends were always best viewed as a new beginning.
ADVENT
XVII
‘I’M GOING TO SHOW you the south front first,’ said Colin.
‘Where is it? Where is it?’ said Lindsay.
‘You can’t see it yet. Wait until we come out of the wood. You’ll see it clearly from the deer park…’ Colin hesitated. ‘That is, well, it’s not much of a park. More a sort of field, really.’
It was going to be a park; Lindsay knew that immediately. She could hear the anxiety and hope in Colin’s voice; she now knew what to expect when Colin began on qualifications and understatements. It was going to be a park, a huge park, a demesne, a place of appalling perfection. She had encountered this park in innumerable films and novels and, in her mind’s eye, she could see it already.
It had been landscaped by Capability Brown, or some similar man of genius. It would declare at a glance the mastery of his vision, his gift for disguising artifice, and his sublime use of asymmetry.
&
nbsp; There would be oaks. She could see these oaks now, in their venerable majesty; she could see not grass but ancestral greensward, descending from the brink of the house to the brink of some lake, a lake created 200 years before (or thereabouts; she was not too sure of the exact dates here), a lake which now looked as if the hand of God had put it there.
She was sure that, on the far side of that lake, there would be some quaint temple, the vista towards which, and from which, would have been contrived with eighteenth-century grace, wit and decorum. She was afraid of this temple, this lake, these oaks and this greensward. She was afraid of any property large enough to boast a park, and she was terrified of the house at the heart of it. The reason for this fear was simple: she feared temple, lake, greensward, oaks, park, house, because they belonged to Colin.
For the past two days, she had been trying to persuade Colin to describe his house—forewarned is forearmed, she had told herself. She had tried on the long overnight flight from New York, which they had taken that Friday; she had tried in her London apartment, to which they had returned from the airport in Colin’s extraordinary car, the most powerful she had ever driven in. She had tried on the motorway down here, and when they finally arrived—not at some country inn, that plan had changed, but at Shute Farm—she had tried again.
Not at first. She had been so entranced by the farmhouse, which proved even lovelier than it had seemed in photographs, that for some time she had forgotten Shute Court altogether. Colin had somehow ensured that the farmhouse had been made ready for them; they could spend this night there, he had suggested. Some fairy had been in, Lindsay felt, forgetting the magic wand of money. This benevolent personage had lit the cooking stove, lit the fires, polished and cleaned, made up the brass bed with lavender-scented sheets, and left food and wine for them. Even the lights had been left on, so, as Colin’s great car purred and bumped its way up a rutted track, and she saw the house for the first time through the gathering dusk of a winter’s afternoon, its lighted windows seemed to welcome them.