“Stop overthinking. I can see the gears turning in your head, Belle,” Chelsea chided. “He digs you. You’ve lusted after him since middle school. Just enjoy it and don’t analyze it to death. It’s not a freaking thesis project, it’s a relationship. You can’t diagram love.”
Belle huffed out a breath. “I am so sick of people dissing the way I am. Do I make fun of your artistic lifestyle? Do I talk about how financially risky your life is? Have I ever done anything but support you, Chelsea? What right do you have to sneer at the way I organize my thoughts?” She stood up and tossed the blanket on the chair she vacated. “I’m going in.”
“Belle! Wait. I’m sorry!”
She heard her sister calling after her but stomped away, not wanting to hear it.
Once she got into the house she heard the phone ringing and grabbed it, eager for something to do before going back outside.
Rafe saw the argument unfold and watched as Belle walked away, torn as to whether he should go after her or not.
“Go on. Just don’t push.” Brian shoved him in the direction of his gaze and Rafe didn’t pause once he’d decided to go.
“Why can’t this wait? I’m here with my family for the holidays.”
Rafe caught part of her phone conversation.
“This is ridiculous! I haven’t had a day off since January, David. This can wait until I get back.”
Rafe saw her check her watch and heave a sigh.
“Fine. Fine. No, don’t wait for me. Just leave it in my inbox and I’ll get it signed today.” She hung up and he made noise as he came fully into the room.
She faced him and gave a wan smile. “Hi.”
“Can I give you a ride into San Francisco? We could have some alone time and you could show me your place.”
She moved to him and took his hands, kissing the fleshy part of his hand below his thumbs. “I need to go. I’ll be back later but I have to deal with this paperwork. I shouldn’t have answered the phone but…anyway. Thanks for the offer but I need to do this alone.”
His normally larger than life Belle looked pale and wan. He ached to make things right for her but knew she had to do it herself or she’d never truly come to him. He cupped her cheek. “I’ll keep the bed warm for you.”
“I won’t be that long! I’m just running to the office and coming right back. Three hours at most depending on traffic. Will you tell them? I can’t deal right now and I have to go.”
“Belle, I won’t do your dirty work. I’ll tell them but you’re going to have to deal when you get back,” he said gently.
Her jaw tensed and her smile fell away. “It’s not dirty work! This is my job. No one frowns at Brian when he has a patient delivering a baby and leaves during dinner. I won’t feel guilty for having achieved something important.” She stepped back and he felt a bit colder but he wouldn’t let her anger push him. She knew what he meant.
“All right, Belle. I’ll see you when you get back. Drive safely.” He brushed a kiss over her lips and left her there in the house as he went back out.
Chapter 6
Belle had let anger fuel her all the way until she reached her office door. It was a Saturday, two days before Christmas and during Hanukah and still there were plenty of attorneys working. Mainly the younger ones but doors to the big offices were closed with the lights on so senior partners were there as well.
She stood in her doorway and stared into the space she’d scraped and fought and given up her life for. That small space with the pretty desk and the neatly organized files and utterly clean surface.
The papers David said absolutely had to be signed sat in her inbox. They were, as she thought, something that could have easily waited until her return. She made quick work of them and took them to his secretary’s desk, leaving them there and heading to get out as soon as she could. If she took a look at anything else in her inbox she’d end up working and her family deserved her presence and her attention.
“Annabelle, there you are! Say, can you come in for a few minutes and talk with me on this case?” David leaned against his doorjamb.
“No. I thought you were going on vacation.” How could she ever have looked up to this man? He knew she didn’t need to sign those papers, knew she was with her family and he did it just to yank her chain.
“We leave tomorrow. And what do you mean, no?”
“I’m on vacation. My family is expecting me for dinner. I left rather abruptly and I need to get back. I’ll speak with you in January when you return.” She moved past him toward the elevators and he followed.
“Annabelle, you can’t just walk away! This is important.”
She hit the down button and waited. “I’m not just walking away. I’m on vacation. I came back to sign those papers and now I’m going back to what I was doing.” Belle wanted to smack him but he was, in essence, one of her bosses.
When the elevator came he narrowed his eyes at her, daring her to get on and suddenly, anger that he was just playing power games bloomed within her. She wasn’t a freaking thing, she was a person, a damned good attorney.
“Good afternoon, David.” She looked unconcerned while the doors closed on his shocked face and then leaned against the wall as she headed to the garage below.
Rafe had left by the time she got back. His whole family had gathered and she knew he would want to be with them. Or so she told herself to not feel so bad he hadn’t waited for her.
Instead she tentatively mended fences with Chelsea and ended up staying until nearly midnight, playing cards with Scott and watching old movies. In truth, she allowed herself the feeling of being safe as they lay on the big couch eating popcorn with no light but the jewel tones on the tree.
Scott didn’t press her about her job. Didn’t harass her about how she looked and didn’t try and guilt her over leaving to deal with work. He just hung out with her, hogging the food and let her be. That was his appeal, he was the second oldest of all the siblings and seemed the most comfortable with himself and his place in the world. He worked the farm with Kevin and their father and seemed to love it.
“I need to go home.” He finally sat up, stretching.
Belle got up and straightened the room as he put away the movie. After a quick clean up in the kitchen, he walked her to her car and hugged her before they both headed out.
Before she closed her car door, he asked, “Do you want to stay at my apartment tonight? I can sleep on the couch and you can have my bed.”
“Thanks, Scott but I’m all right. I just needed some time to think. I’m going straight to sleep.”
He laughed. “If you say so but we both know he’s going to be waiting for you. He’s not a man to just let go of things he wants. And normally, you’re not a woman who runs from what’s important. So yeah, those are my deep thoughts for the day. I’ll see you later.”
She laughed as he closed her door.
Just like Scott predicted, Rafe was up watching It’s a Wonderful Life when she walked in, trying to be quiet.
“Hey,” she said quietly, not knowing if Brian was asleep or not.
“Is this where you try to act like there’s nothing wrong?” He remained sitting but his eyes didn’t miss anything.
“This is where I walked in the door fifteen seconds ago and said hi.” She crossed her arms across her chest and looked back at him. “Is this where you try to pick a fight?”
“You’re the one who left today and didn’t come back until after midnight. Are you saying I shouldn’t be angry?”
“What? I was back in less than three hours. You were gone when I got back to my parents’ house. I’ve been there all afternoon and evening. You’re the one who got all snippy this afternoon. I came back like I said I would. You weren’t there and now you have the audacity to accuse me of being at work when all you had to do was call my parents’ house to see where I was if you were so concerned about it?”
He stalked to where she stood but she didn’t give any ground.
“Why didn’t you come home?” When he reached for her, she didn’t stop him but didn’t melt into his embrace either.
“Why didn’t you call?”
“We’re both being stupid.” He kissed the corner of her mouth.
“You’re being more stupid than me.”
He laughed and led her toward his bedroom.
When Rafe woke up the next morning, Belle wasn’t in bed with him. Frowning, he got dressed and went in search of her. He’d traded off with Gabe and their father so he didn’t have to be up a four-thirty every morning. Even so, it was just after six and still pretty dark.
The house was quiet and she wasn’t in her room or anywhere else he looked. At least her car was still in the driveway.
He felt like shit. He’d overplayed his hand the night before, first by leaving when she hadn’t returned in two hours and then by not just at least driving by the Taylors to see if her car was there. A stupid, impulsive and sort of juvenile move on his part.
“So, did you make up with Belle or not?” Brian strolled into the kitchen as Rafe made coffee.
“Mostly. I think. She didn’t hit me with a shovel or anything. She’s not here though.”
“She’s probably on a run. She said she wanted to take one but hadn’t done it yet. She could use the time in the air and the exercise. What crawled up your ass anyway? I thought you were okay with Belle working.” Brian put some bread in the toaster and rooted through the fridge for jam.
Rafe blew out an agitated breath. “I am. But…fuck, she’s got this whole other life in San Francisco. A life I’m not a part of. It’s rich and urbane and I get up at four-thirty to drive a tractor and oversee fruit picking and cow milking.”
“Rafe, do you think she cares about that stuff? She may live in a swank condo in the city but she’s a farm girl at heart. And this place isn’t exactly a barn you know.” Brian indicated the grand kitchen they stood in.
“I don’t know. Damn it, I never expected to feel this deeply for her. I mean, I’ve always loved her like a member of my family and then things began to change five years ago and every time I saw her I resisted but now? I haven’t and I’m in love with Belle. Head over heels and I’m a damned cliché.”
Brian laughed. “As creeped out as I am by my best friend and my sister sleeping together, you saying that makes me feel a lot better. She needs that grounding influence in her life. She’s due to go back to work the day after tomorrow though. What will you do?”
Rafe sighed. “She and I need to talk it through.”
“Well, my remodel will be done in a few weeks. It’s probably done enough for me to move out now.”
“Brian, even if she does accept my proposal, there’s room for you until your house is finished.”
“Did you just say proposal? You’re going to ask her to marry you?” Brian’s eyes widened.
“Shit, I did, didn’t I?” Rafe shrugged as he realized that was indeed what he said and what he meant. “I know it seems soon.”
“Rafe, you’ve known her since she was a toddler. It’s not like you two just met. But you know, she’s not impulsive, even when she’s known the man proposing to her for over two decades. It’ll be interesting.” Brian snickered and Rafe tossed a spoon at his head.
The front door opened and closed and Rafe steeled himself. A few moments later Belle came in and he wanted to drop to his knees she was so beautiful.
“Good morning. I take it you went on a run?” He moved to her and kissed her, glad she kissed him back.
“Yeah. I’m rusty. I try to hit the treadmill a few days a week but it’s not always possible and man it’s cold out there. There was ice on the cars.”
Rafe had her sit down and hid his smile when she smoothed out the placemats.
“Let me get you some coffee. I was about to make breakfast, you up for eggs?”
“All those pretty looks and he cooks too. I’m totally in heaven.”
“Hey, play your cards right and you can have this every day.” Rafe took a risk when he said it but she cocked her head and smiled. Maybe there was hope after all.
They ate breakfast and visited until Brian left to go see some patients and to run errands. Working side by side, Rafe and Belle cleaned the kitchen and that’s when he noticed the change in his cabinets.
“Minx. My organized little beauty.”
“Now you can find your spices. I made a list of the things you needed more of. Some of that stuff is really old. I also took the liberty of tidying up your silverware and cutlery. You know if the knives are all loose in there without being in any order, they’ll hit the blades and get dull.”
She looked so serious, he kissed the tip of her nose instead of laughing like he wanted to. “Thank you.”
“I hope you don’t mind me doing that.” Her voice had a hesitance and he shook his head.
“I love that you did it for me. I want you to be at home here. And it’s not like I’m complaining that you cleaned stuff up.”
“I like being here. I like being with you. I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings yesterday by leaving to deal with work shit.” She swallowed hard and shook her head. “It wasn’t even important. He just yanked my chain because he could.”
Anger washed through him at that. “Why would he do that?”
“It’s all a power play. Dominance games. It’s normal in some firms. It is with mine.”
“Belle, I don’t want to be judgmental but is that what you want?” He shoved a hand through his hair, annoyed that anyone would toy with her that way.
“I want to take a shower. Can we do that together or do you have someplace to be? We can talk about this afterward. I’ve been thinking and I have more thinking to do but I really just want to be clean right now and to be with you.” The way she asked was so sweet, so vulnerable it nearly broke his heart. For all that strength and ambition, there was a woman in there who faced some big changes and she was scared.
Even if he had to be somewhere he would have tossed it aside to be with her when she asked. He was so in love with Annabelle Taylor his world canted to the side for a moment.
“I don’t have to be anywhere but with you. Go ahead on and get the water hot, I’ll be in with towels right after you.”
She hugged him briefly and he watched as she jogged away, all her best parts jiggling a bit.
She’d stepped into the now hot spray and tipped her head back, letting the water warm her and wash away the morning’s run. She wished it could wash away her doubts too.
Every moment she could remember, she’d known what she wanted. She’d made a plan to achieve it. She worked through it and made it a reality and moved to the next thing. Her life was one big to do list and she crossed off achievement after achievement. That’s how the universe made sense. Whenever anything felt out of focus, she had her lists and her charts.
But her job was not what it needed to be. God, she actually let that asshole David treat her like shit the day before. For no other reason than that he could.
She hadn’t gone to school and worked her ass off to lose contact with her family, work every waking moment and get treated like shit. Especially when she excelled at what she did. She knew she was a damned good attorney and HPG was lucky to have her.
She had a great condo with a spectacular view. The kind of view people dreamed of when they thought of living in San Francisco. But what good was it when she never saw it? Her beautiful furniture and art, the gorgeous sunrises and great neighborhood restaurants were all just a fantasy to her because she was always at work.
Her dream was dissolving and she felt as if she were clinging to smoke. The only real thing in her life was Rafe. When had she fallen in love with him? And it was love, she knew that for sure. She supposed it happened day by day and once something romantic unleashed between them, all that love she already felt simply shifted into the spot that’d been waiting for him and only him.
“Mmm, it’s Christmas day already. There’s a luscious younger woman in my sho
wer. Whatever shall I do with her?” Rafe joined her, his hands immediately caressing her, sliding over her soap slicked skin until she writhed.
“Have you been good, Rafe?” she asked as she opened her eyes to take in the masculine beauty of his face. The strong, square jaw, the neat, closely trimmed beard and mustache, the full lips and those brown eyes fringed with thick lashes. No man had ever been more handsome in her opinion, than the one currently looking at her like she was the best thing ever.
“I plan to be a lot better in just a minute. Turn around, Belle. Spread your legs and put your hands on the tile when you bend forward.”
Shivers ran through her when he repeated back her fantasy from a few nights prior. The cool of the tile in the enclosure was in marked contrast to the humid air and the heat of his hand against her hip as he held her in place.
“I saw you watching me today when I played basketball with the guys, Belle. Did it make you hot?” He thrust into her body in one arch of his hips, filling her instantly and totally.
“Y-yes. Yes, it did.” She closed her eyes, her fingers pressing against the tile to find some sort of purchase, emotional and physical, as he surrounded her.
“I thought so. Your nipples were hard when you walked past and you licked your lips. I thought about what they’d feel like wrapped around my cock. Your shorts showed off your legs, cupped your ass and I wanted to follow you into the house and fuck you. We’d have to be quiet because everyone was right outside.”
Just like in her fantasy.
He rammed himself into her cunt over and over as she struggled to breathe. “You’re so tight and so wet, I want to feel you without a condom on, Belle. I want to feel the walls of that sweet, hot cunt when my cock is naked.”
She wanted that too. Wanted to give him every part of herself.
“You want to touch your clit right now, don’t you?”
She nodded vigorously. “Please, you do it,” she gasped out.
He fucked into her so hard her breasts bounced and she saw bursts of light behind her closed eyes. He reached around and soapy fingers found her clit. She stuttered a plea for release and his dark chuckle brushed against her ear.