“Did... you... want . . . to . . . fuck... her?” he enunciated. His voice was disembodied and seemed to float in the air around them. It would have been eerily spooky to the normal person, but they were all used to abnormality at that point.
Drew chuckled nervously. “What kind of question is that?”
“Obviously one that I need the answer to, or I wouldn’t have asked it.”
Kerrigan was appalled. “No! That’s asinine! How can you even ask something like that?”
He finally looked at her. “How do you know? There has to be some reason he took you into his sanctuary. If it wasn’t that, then what was it?”
“I took her there to show her a faster way to absorb my Light.” Drew thought it best to leave out the part about thinking that maybe she was his soul mate. It wasn’t important, and a completely moot at this point.
Dominic gave Kerrigan an accusing look. “So, it wasn’t the phone call with your mother that gave you the idea to take me to your sanctuary. It was the trip into his that gave you the idea that it could help me. So you lied about that, too.”
“Yes, he took me into his sanctuary, but it wasn’t until I talked to my mother that it dawned on me that pulling you into mine might have the same effect, that you would absorb my energy. I didn’t lie, I just didn’t tell you everything because I knew you’d get upset over something that wasn’t that big of a deal.”
“Omission of the truth is the same thing, Kerrigan,” he said with an air of smugness. It was the same thing she had said to him when she first learned of his secret, and he was throwing her words back in her face. “And in case you missed the memo, it is a very big deal.”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “Yeah, I get that.” Thunder rumbled overhead, and the sky darkened. “You know what? I’ve had about enough of your pity party of one. I only delayed telling you about the baby because I knew you’d stop me from helping you. Other than that, I haven’t done anything wrong, so you can go on claiming that’s the reason you’re acting like a bastard all you want, but everyone here knows the truth, including you.”
“And that is?”
“You don’t want this baby.”
“I never said that I don’t want the baby.” Dominic defended himself, but the tone of his voice gave no indication of his true feelings. Probably because he wasn’t sure of them himself.
“You didn’t say that you do either.” She had him there.
Getting no reply to the contrary, she turned to Drew, who had backed up to allow them some space. He was fascinated with the sudden change in weather, although he knew exactly what had caused it, just like she did. And then the rain fell in fat dollops.
“Drew, I will see you tomorrow night. Syd, I could really use a ride, if you don’t mind.”
“And just where do you think you’re going?” Dominic asked.
“I know I’m going to see Lucy,” she said with much attitude. “If you’ll recall, she said if we ever needed her help to come see her, and the way I see it, we need her more than ever right now. Maybe she knows how I can channel all this energy without passing out.” She walked past them. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, and even if you won’t, I don’t care... I’m in a hurry. Her shop is about to close, and I’d like to catch her before she heads home for the evening.”
“I’m coming, too.” Olivia quick-stepped it to catch up with them.
Gabe fell in line. “Y’all ain’t leaving me here with these assholes.”
Kerrigan never looked back as she walked to the Lady Bug parked in Sydney and Olivia’s driveway. But once she was out of sight, tucked away in the relative seclusion of the car with only her friends surrounding her, the tears fell. Outside the car, the clouds poured buckets of rain, and the wind howled a sad song to match the sorrow in her heart.
Dominic didn’t want their baby.
Kerrigan had insisted Gabe and the girls wait for her in the car while she went to see her grandmother’s best friend. Her mood hadn’t improved in the slightest, so it was still raining buckets with roars of thunder rumbling across the sky. One look at Kerrigan soaked from head to toe, and her friends didn’t put up much of a fight.
Lucy was just locking up her shop when Kerrigan slowed her run to a walk down the cobblestone sidewalk that led to Silver Feather. She didn’t say anything as she approached the seer from behind, but she didn’t have to.
“Running a little late, aren’t you?” Hearing Lucy’s voice soothed her somewhat.
Kerrigan laughed. “So now you have eyes in the back of your head? I thought that was just something mothers told their children to make them behave when she wasn’t around.”
Lucy unlocked the door again and turned to her with a warm smile. She tapped the outside corner of her eye. “I’m a seer, dear, remember? The last time you visited and I saw that you were pregnant I knew you’d be back today.” She looked up toward the darkening sky. Thick, gray clouds covered what was left of the waning sun. She sighed and turned her attention back to Kerrigan. “Trouble in paradise, I see.”
“Did you know I’d keep the secret from him?”
Lucy nodded.
“You know, it would’ve saved me a lot of trouble if you’d told me what a horrible mistake I’d be making.”
“It is not my place to interfere in affairs of the heart. Besides, if you had told him, I’m sure he would have refused to let you continue your training.”
“You saw that?”
“No, child. I didn’t have to. Dominic is very protective of the people he cares about. It’s a given that he would do whatever it takes to keep you safe.”
“That’s exactly what I thought.” Kerrigan shivered, completely soaked from the relentless rain.
“Well, don’t just stand there, for Heaven’s sake. Get in here.” Lucy waved toward the open door. “Standing outside in the rain is no place for a young lady with child.”
Kerrigan jogged over and Lucy stepped aside to let her into the shop before closing and locking the door behind them. Then she turned on the light and set her things on the counter beside her.
“You didn’t come here for advice on how to handle this situation with your beau, did you?”
“No. Sinclair has ordered Drew to bring Colton to her tomorrow night. The problem is that, although we know what we have to do to stop her and Drake, the energy it requires is too much for me to handle.” She shrugged in embarrassment. “I sort of passed out when I tried to do it last night.”
Lucy sighed. “I was afraid it was going to come down to this. What you’re trying to do is very dangerous. I suppose you want me to take a look and see if I can tell what you need to do to protect yourself?”
Kerrigan nodded. “I’m sorry to ask, but I didn’t know who else to turn to.”
“Nonsense, child. I told you to come to me if you needed my help.” Lucy went over to her and took her hands, giving them a squeeze. Then she closed her eyes and exhaled a calming breath to relax. Her eyes shifted back and forth under their lids, but her face showed no emotion. After a moment, she opened them again and looked up toward the ceiling with a knowing smile. “Oh, Availia, you are one smart cookie, my friend.”
“What?”
Lucy shook her head. “Your Grammy, God rest her soul, has already given you the very tool you need to control and channel all that energy appropriately. I may be the seer, but she always knew much more than I did and far sooner than my limited abilities would allow.”
Kerrigan looked confused.
Lucy fingered the bracelet her grandmother had given her all those years ago. “These precious stones have so many purposes. I can’t believe I didn’t realize it right from the beginning. The moonstone has the power to absorb energy, not only from natural sources, but from the purest of sources... the gift within you. You can use it to stabilize the overflow and then draw from it as needed.”
Kerrigan furrowed her brow. “I don’t understand. I was wearing it last night, and it didn’t seem to help at all.”
“Hmm... were you very emotional?”
“Well, yeah. That’s what helped me pull the energy I needed.”
Lucy cupped Kerrigan’s cheek. “Oh, Sunshine.” Lucy used the name her Grammy had always called her, and Kerrigan held her breath for a moment. Kind eyes regarded her with sympathy and love. “The night your grandmother was attacked, it wasn’t her they had wanted. It was you. Her passion to save you was the source of her demise. I saw as much when she and I last spoke, and even though I shouldn’t have, I tried to warn her, but she wouldn’t listen. So, I’m begging you... for your sake and for that of your unborn child, you must find a way to filter your emotions through your gift. Find the balance.”
A sharp pain stabbed at her chest and pierced her heart. Her Grammy was dead because of her, because she was protecting her. Tears sprang to her eyes as the pain and guilt of that knowledge ripped at her.
“But I wasn’t there! I wasn’t really there!” She was frantic with the need to understand. Guardians were protectors of mankind, so why wouldn’t the people to whom the powers chose to entrust that gift deserve the same protection?
Lucy wrapped her arms around her shoulders and pulled her into what was supposed to be a comforting embrace. But Kerrigan could not be comforted. She was angry and felt betrayed, like everything she and her grandmother had tried to do was for nothing if they were so easily discarded by the forces that empowered them.
“Oh, Kerrigan... you didn’t have to be there physically. Guardians from the same bloodline are linked on a much higher level. It’s for that very reason you were there spiritually. She put you in the Light so they couldn’t find you. Do you remember that?”
“I just want to know why. What’s so special about me that she had to die to protect me? Why do they want me dead?”
Lucy hugged her tightly to her chest and rubbed her back as if she could somehow smooth the wrinkles of fear, frustration, and anger away by touch alone. The battle Lucy felt in that one millisecond before she spoke reluctant words was palpable. “Because you hold the key.”
“The key to what? Who are they?” Her voice was thick with the sobs she choked back.
Lucy pulled back and shook her head, avoiding Kerrigan’s eyes. “I’ve said too much already. It wasn’t my intention to make you feel guilty for Availia’s passing. There were many causes she felt were worthy to risk her life for, but you... you were the greatest.”
She took Kerrigan’s hand and regarded the bracelet. “You were more important to her than you can ever imagine. Availia will probably never forgive me for not being more delicate with you.”
Lucy released her hand and grabbed a tissue from the box on the counter, dabbing at the streaks of tears falling down Kerrigan’s cheeks. “Now, I can’t let you leave without telling you that the path you’re traveling still has many obstacles along the way, but if you are steadfast, there is no doubt that you will overcome them.” She took Kerrigan by the shoulders. “Just remember that no matter how much you may feel that you’re on your own, it is never the case. Guardians watch out for you, Kerrigan—one at each side, taking the journey with you and providing protection, and two that lead the way, helping to clear your path. Should you become exhausted or find yourself unable to continue, they will carry you the distance. When you need it the most, help will arrive.”
There was something about the confidence in Lucy’s tone that comforted her. To know that Guardians from her bloodline were watching over her, even though she couldn’t see them, gave her renewed strength and fortified her faith. Now, if only she could find some way to be as certain about her future with Dominic. That was another ordeal altogether, but one thing was certain—she was going to that graveyard to do her duty, whether he liked it or not. Her grandmother’s death would not be in vain.
The rain hadn’t let up on the ride home. The occupants of the car were silent, seeming to sense Kerrigan’s need to be left alone with her thoughts after she assured them she was fine. She didn’t tell her friends about her connection to her grandmother’s death because the heartache and guilt was just too fresh. She would tell them once she had time to come to terms with it herself, but not before.
A very solid Dominic was sitting alone with a beer on Sydney and Olivia’s porch when they pulled into the drive. She seemed to find him like that a lot lately. He stood when she got out of the car, obviously wanting to talk, or yell, or issue orders that she would likely ignore again so she was automatically on the defensive.
“You might as well turn your tight little ass around and head right on into that house,” Gabe said. “You and Colton can shack up with the Doubledick twins tonight while us girls have a slumber party at our house, ’cause y’all sure as hell ain’t gettin’ none tonight.”
“Fine, but I need to talk to Kerrigan first.” Dominic’s voice was scratchy and tired.
Gabe put his hand on his hip. “What part of ‘you ain’t gettin’ none tonight’ did you not understand?”
“Oh, fuck off, Gabe!” Dominic yelled, and Kerrigan narrowed her eyes. Never had he raised his voice at her friend, but then again, there were a lot of things he was doing that he had never done before. She was starting to think that maybe she didn’t know him at all.
Dominic continued. “This shit isn’t about you. It isn’t about any of you. It’s between me and Kerrigan, and there’s no reason for you three to let it spill over into your own relationships and act as if our problems are yours. That’s crazy!”
The women all looked mortified, but Kerrigan seemed unaffected.
“Oh, don’t get your girdles all twisted. I’ve had the same talk with them,” he said, just barely redeeming himself. “Tyson, Talon, Colton... they’re good men, and they put up with a whole lot of shit from you, just like you put up with a whole lot of shit from them. All of you... you need to get your acts together before you let something that has nothing to do with you destroy what you have.”
Kerrigan looked around at her friends, noting the way they hung their heads. She hated to admit it, but Dominic was right. There was no reason for them to let their relationships crumble because of the issues between the two of them. She could tell by the looks on her friends’ faces that they wanted to make amends with their significant others. In truth, that was probably the reason the ride home had been so quiet.
“He’s right. You guys should go on in, get dry, and snuggle up to your men. Dominic and I need to talk.”
“Are you sure?” Olivia asked.
She looked Dominic over, not seeing any indication of the direction their conversation might go, but knowing it needed to happen. “Yeah. I’ll talk to you in the morning. Goodnight.”
She was soaked to the bone, but she turned and started toward her backyard instead of into the house. She needed to be close to her grandmother, and the garden was the closest thing she had to her. She could hear Dominic’s footsteps behind her, stopping when she did next to the old magnolia tree.
“You’re wet. We should go inside.”
Kerrigan looked up at the night sky, not really sure what she was looking for. Something to help calm her—the moon and the stars maybe, but of course the dark storm clouds she had caused more than dwarfed them.
She could feel the warmth of his body against her back when he stepped closer to her. “We need to talk about tomorrow night.”
She had hoped he wanted to talk about the baby—that he would apologize for acting like an ass and tell her that he was happy. The fact that he didn’t only solidified what she already knew. He wasn’t happy about the baby. She had been so stupid to believe his feelings had changed in such a short time and as much as she tried not to be, she wasn’t only hurt, she was angry.
But if their rendezvous with his ex and his father was what he wanted to talk about, that was fine. At least that way she could get her anger out without looking so pathetic. The wind picked up as a thunderous clap roared above them. “I’m going to the graveyard.”
Dominic took her by the shoulder
and forced her to turn around and look at him. His eyes blazed with emotion and a look that said she was being impulsive and stupid was written all over his face. It only served to enrage her further. “You can’t be serious. After what happened to you just in the training session alone? Are you crazy? You could get killed.”
She stuck her chin out defiantly, steeling herself in her decision. “It’s my duty as a Guardian, and I am going to be there tomorrow when Drew takes Colton to Sinclair. End of discussion.”
“I’m not going to let you do that.” Fat droplets of water fell from the tips of his hair with each adamant shake of his head. His body was rigid with pent-up frustration, his cotton T-shirt soaked through and showcasing the rippling muscles that defined his upper torso.
The storm’s anger seemed to mimic Dominic’s as bands of rain carried by gusts of wind whipped around Kerrigan. Petals that had been shaken from the magnolia blooms above them drifted to the ground. Raindrops fell onto her face, and she batted her lashes to keep them out of her eyes. Her shoulders shook with a humorless laugh as if to say he had some nerve, and then she turned to walk away.
Wet tendrils of her long hair slapped at his skin when he grabbed her by the elbow and spun her around to face him. “Don’t turn your back on me. We need to talk about this.”
Kerrigan jerked her arm out of his grasp. “You don’t own me, Dominic. And you sure as hell aren’t going to tell me what I can and can’t do.”
“You’re pregnant with my baby!” he yelled while jabbing a finger into his sternum.
She guffawed at his audacity and narrowed her mascara-smudged eyes at him. “Like you give a damn.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked, backing her up to the tree and putting his hands on the low branches to cage her in.
“It means you couldn’t care less that I’m carrying your child. Besides, that has nothing to do with any of this, and you know it. You’re just trying to use our baby as a tool to control me. Well guess what, Dominic? It doesn’t work like that. You don’t get to walk around here regretting that we’ve created this life, and then when it suits your purpose suddenly act concerned just because you think it gives you a right to dictate my life. It. Doesn’t.”