The warmth of his blood and flesh made me tired. I jumped back up the rocky cliff to my hiding spot, pushing my clothes under an overhanging rock with my nose. Circling twice, I lay down, curling into a ball to rest.
My morning nap was suddenly shattered by the sounds of a large truck and men talking. The sun was late in the sky. I crept to the edge of the rocks toward the noise. It was too far off through the trees to see anything, but they were making enough racket that even the dead could have heard them.
“Set that one over there on the left.”
“Got it, sir.”
“Where in the hell did Grey run off to?”
My heart pounded with fear and anticipation. I could smell him—he was close. I searched the waterfall and the pond for him, but not a ripple was out of place. Why did my survival instincts not wake me up? I was a werewolf; I should have heard him coming miles away. A rock clattered from below where I hid as Grey climbed up into view. He saw me and froze but not with fear. He almost looked excited, but there wasn’t time to figure out the inner workings of his crazy mind. I threw myself off the cliff too quickly and skidded down the last few feet, ripping my flesh. The pain pulsed through my limbs. I ran through the trees, but he was following close. I could hear his footsteps. I knew if he could still see me, it wouldn’t be safe to run too fast. It would cause too much suspicion. I just had to out-maneuver him until I was out of sight.
My fascination with him had affected my ability to protect myself. Anger coursed through my veins, shooting through me like a steroid, but he was still gaining on me. Impossible. I was going to have to break the rules. I couldn’t let him get too close. I glanced behind to see his smiling face. What did he have to smile about? Maybe I should just turn around and take a bite out of his ass. Then he would have something to smile about, I snickered to myself.
I turned, breaking left through the dark canopy of the trees. Faster and faster I ran from his sight. Only small slivers of light broke through the trees to the ground, giving it an ominous look, light versus dark, good versus evil. Glancing back, I couldn’t see him anymore. He was gone and I was free. As I looked forward, my eyes began to water as a cracking sound registered in my mind, followed by the slamming of metal. The pain rippled through my body, and I whimpered as my nails tore at the metal-bottomed cage and I fell onto my side.
Trapped.
I looked through the bars; I was surrounded by cages. There had to be fifteen metal cages out here, all set and ready to catch large prey like me. I had run right between them. I must have passed about five of them before smashing my shoulder into this one. I licked my shoulder as I remembered the pain that had already started to fade.
There was a slit of light right outside my cage shining on the dented lock. If I could just reach it, I could set myself free. And this would all be a bad memory.
Who did Grey think he was, running with wolves as if he were afraid of nothing? I was a predator, he was my prey. Sure, my sole existence was to protect him and his kind, but he didn’t know that.
I shifted back into my very naked human form and shivered from the cold metal under my legs as I slipped my thin hand through the bars. The light hit my skin, and I marveled at how my pale skin looked in the ominous light. It almost glowed around the edges.
I had to get this unlocked, I reminded myself. Then I would be free. I pushed on it with all my strength, but my hand slipped, and the metal lever cut deep into my fleshy palm. I cried out from the pain and licked my palm as I would if I were my animal self. My saliva would numb the pain until I shifted again.
I reached through the bars again . . . I almost had it. Just a little harder, but it was such a difficult angle. None of this would have happened if Grey wasn’t so stupid. I fumed at his absolute disregard for his own safety. I caught Grey’s scent coming closer, and I quickly pulled my hand back inside.
“What the hell?” Grey said. As he came running over, I shifted into a wolf.
He fell to his knees to unlock the cage. “I’m so sorry, miss—are you okay? I don’t know what happened. But I’ll get you out.” Then he looked up into the golden eyes of a wild animal—my eyes.
Grey sat back pretzel-style, letting his hand fall from the lock to the ground, but his eyes never left mine. His eyes were glowing around the edges, and his scent was musky and earthy. It made me feel warm and content. I wanted to touch his face, to ease the worried lines between his eyes, to rub my lips ever so lightly across his and feel the warmth of his skin on mine.
“But I saw you.”
I cocked my head to the side, watching his movements, trying to read his expressions. Mostly concern. Could it be concern for his mental health? Thinking he saw a woman, only to be confronted with a red wolf? Or concern for the wolf herself? He turned his head to match the angle of mine. He seemed to be humanizing me.
I winked at him, and he smiled and winked back.
“I know what I saw, Red. I know what I saw.”
What did he know? He was just a human. He thought he knew what he saw, but he didn’t know anything. Then again, neither did I. My mind whirled through the possibilities for these cages—were the victims to be destroyed? His smile faded. He looked almost expectant, as though he thought I would change before his eyes, but I could outlast his curiosity. I could stare at his perfect face all day. As though he sensed my decision, Grey stood up.
“Look, I know I’m not supposed to let you go, but I can’t leave you here. You’re far too beautiful of a creature, a vision. So you better not hurt me when I set you free. . . .” He sighed. “Geez, I’m talking to her like she’s going to talk back,” he said to himself. Grey unlocked the cage and stepped back, letting it fall open. There was an ocean of space between us, but I felt unable to cross it. “Go ahead, you’re free,” he said.
I hesitated. I wanted to be with him to ease his worry, but I decided to save my own skin. I leapt from the cage toward him, knocking him over into the dirt. He groaned from the fall. I stood with my front paws on his chest as I felt the rise and fall of his breathing. Still he showed no fear. He reached up and touched my shoulder, feeling the soft fur of my neck between his fingers. I leaned into his touch, drowning in my desire.
I licked his cheek and ran into the darkness. I ran from fear and from the passion that swarmed in my stomach like bees. The salty tang of his skin remained on my tongue, taunting me.
I had to get back to my clothes and get out of here. Luckily, I didn’t hear him following me. The sounds of the forest were silent as the creatures watched me flee from my greatest fear, a cage—whether the cage was a cold, metal box or the oppressive societal position of a woman in my culture. Forever beneath another. Even in marriage, she was never an equal. Trapped as a servant, all thoughts and opinions stripped from her. All because her father sold her in marriage. A servant to her father, a servant to her husband, a servant to the world. That was not the life I chose. Those were not my rules. I was through following the rules of someone else’s game.
I quickly shifted into human form and put my clothes back on. I sat down to slip on my boots when I heard Grey arguing with someone as they entered the clearing.
“Damn it, Grey, where have you been?”
“I was . . .”
“I don’t even want to hear it. You were supposed to be here helping us set up the cages!”
“I know, it’s just that . . .”
The older man squared his shoulders to Grey. He was probably in his forties, but his skin looked older than that, weathered. The sleeves on his khaki-colored shirt were rolled up over his elbows, he wore leather gloves, and his hair matched Grey’s.
“It doesn’t even matter what your excuse is, Grey! You always have one, don’t you? Absolutely unreliable.”
“But Dad, I had to . . .”
“Had to what? Be a failure?”
“No,” Grey said, as he squared his body up to his dad in silence. His whole body was rippling with rage. Except his eyes. They gave him away with
a deep sadness. No wonder Grey seemed so rebellious, with a father like that. His father’s hand was ready to strike him down for his defiance. In that split-second, I decided what I had to do before it even registered in my mind.
I jumped to the ground silently, out of sight, and I walked toward them calling ahead, “Grey, do you think you guys could give me a lift home when you’re done working?” I paused for dramatic effect. “Oh, you must be Grey’s father. Hi! I’m Ashling. I got myself all lost in the woods, and Grey was nice enough to help me. So sorry I took him away from his work for so long.” I put on my sweetest, most innocent smile. Grey looked confused but seemed willing to accept my lie, for now.
His father’s expression went from rage to confusion to acceptance, even almost friendliness, though he seemed warily aware of me. “Good day, Ashling. I’ve heard so much about you around town.”
“My greatest apologies for keeping Grey from his work, sir.” Looking up at him through my lashes, I smiled my way into his thoughts. Simple creatures, really. I was quite sure a man like Grey’s father liked his women to be quiet. A lot like my father, I mused. I could play that role if it meant getting Grey out of trouble, although now I had to explain my presence in the woods to Grey. I hadn’t even consider that. He was never going to let this go. Yet there I stood, protecting him. Like a fool.
“I’m Grey’s father, Robert Donavan,” he said. “I’m glad Grey was able to help you out. A pretty little thing like yourself, lost in the woods? You could have been eaten up by a big bad wolf. I’m glad my boy was there to save you,” he said slapping Grey on the back. He said “my boy” as if he owned Grey—it was a fatherly assumption I knew all too well. It disgusted me. I had to fight my urge to tell him what I really thought of him.
“Oh yes, sir,” I agreed. What was I doing, I wondered. I should have just stayed hidden. Instead I had to put my little nose where it didn’t belong, and Grey was smiling at me. I wasn’t that good of an actress to have him being all cute over there, looking at me. “I’ll just go sit by the water and watch the animals until you’re done working, Grey. I promise to stay out of the way, sir,” I said. Grey had his father’s chin and strong nose but very different eyes. Robert’s were harsh and uninviting. He studied me suspiciously, and I smiled with all my charm, and he smiled back.
“That is out of the question. We can’t have you out here in the woods alone. There are all sorts of wild animals out here. There were wolves seen just the other day. Grey, you take the rest of the day off and get her home safe.”
“Oh no, sir, that’s not necessary. I can wait. I would hate to be a bother.” I winked at Grey. I was out of my bloody mind.
“I will hear no more about it. Grey, you take her home, and we can pick this work up tomorrow. We’ll head back to the office. Nice to meet you, but next time let’s do it in civilization, shall we?”
“Thank you so much. You’re too kind,” I replied.
Robert walked away, looking over his shoulder at me, leaving me standing next to Grey with a river of lies between us. I figured I had only seconds before he’d seek the truth, which I could never tell him, but that would always separate us.
Grey studied my face and eyes for a long time before fully and obviously taking in my whole body. It was easy to hear the appreciation he had for my body by the sound of his heartbeat. But it was only a physical attraction, not emotional. The best I could hope for was that he would be thankful for my help. Beyond that, there would never be anything between us. He could never feel for me the way I felt for him. The taste of his skin lingered still on my tongue, and I wanted desperately to touch him. I bit my lower lip, breaking the skin; the pain helped slow my raging pulse.
“Shall we?” he asked, gesturing toward the south.
I walked next to him, but neither of us spoke. I caught a glimpse of him watching me out of the corner of his eye, and I looked down at my feet, trudging along, kicking leaves with my boots. I would never be good enough for someone like him.
He surprised me by reaching over and wrapping his fingers with mine, weaving them together. The warmth of his skin radiated against mine. I looked down at the woven tapestry of our hands, fitting perfectly together. I glanced up at his face, but he was looking ahead, allowing me a tiny bit of privacy in this intimate moment.
I had never held the hand of a man before; never such an intimate touch as our palms together. I was sure he had done so much more. Mund would be furious if he knew. I was never allowed to be alone with a male who was not family, and yet Grey’s hand touched mine. It felt as if it had always been there, as if I had been waiting for it. I tightened my grip; I wanted this feeling to last forever. Even if I knew we could never be.
Just for this moment, he was mine.
“So were you out here spying on me?” he asked with a wolfish grin on his lips.
I laughed and tried to pull my hand away, but he didn’t let go. He started rubbing his thumb over the back of my hand, leaving a blazing trail of warmth behind each stroke.
“If you wanted to see me again, you could have just asked,” he said.
“I wasn’t spying on you,” I said, unable to hide my smile.
“Well, that’s disappointing.”
I breathed in his masculine scent, and my skin tingled. Every part of me wanted him. I tried to tell myself I was no good for him, but I couldn’t stop my desire. It was overwhelming, and it didn’t make any sense.
“Who are you?” he asked.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“Who are you, really?”
“You know who I am.”
“Do I?”
We fell silent while his words echoed in my mind. He knew something wasn’t natural about me. And my nerves twitched with warning. I should run away from him, but there was nowhere in the world I’d rather be.
When we reached his motorcycle, the sun was nearly down and what light remained cast mysterious shadows across his face. He hesitated to let go of my hand, fidgeting with my fingertips, and I was in no hurry to let go of his hand either. So we just lingered that way, but finally he let go, letting my hand fall back to my side. Grey mounted his bike in one fluid movement as he glanced back at me over his shoulder.
“Hop on and let me take you for a ride.” His ridiculously cute smile curved up at the corners of his lips. It was impossible not to smile back as I slid right up behind his warm body and I wrapped my arms around his chest, pulling myself closer. I wanted to feel all of him. I rested my face at the nape of his neck, breathing him in.
The bike roared to life, as did his pulse. I felt overwhelmed by the need to be with him and to be touching him. I was losing control and I knew it, but I didn’t care.
I don’t know what direction we drove or how long it took to hit the road. All I knew was how it felt to have my arms wrapped around him, and it was all over too soon. He parked in front of a diner, and my arms reluctantly released him, long after it was appropriate. He slid off the bike and held his hand out to me. I slipped my hand into his as he led me into the diner. We sat in the back corner booth, and he slid his body next to mine. He seemed as eager as I felt to have our skin touching.
A current flowed through my veins every time we touched, and I never wanted it to end. It was a stolen moment, hidden from the world, from rules that weren’t ours, from the inevitability that I would never feel this again.
He brushed my wild curls out of my face as he let the back of his hand lightly brush my lips. I exhaled sharply. Mund had described mates binding and how the overpowering essence of love was instant, but this was incredible. There wasn’t a doubt that it was happening to me, at this very moment. Every inch of my body burned for him.
“So what were you really doing alone in the woods today?”
Finally it came, as I dreaded it would. What could I ever tell him that wouldn’t send him running away? The truth was forbidden. If I let him try to decide, then I wouldn’t have to lie. I could just go along with whatever he dreamed u
p. My nervousness gnawed at me, and I began fidgeting with the napkin-wrapped silverware, unable to meet his probing green eyes.
“I got lost.”
He laughed. “I doubt that. There is more to you. Anyone can see that.”
“No,” I whispered.
“Don’t you see how everyone reacts to you? They flock to you.”
“They are just being polite.”
“Can’t you see how every guy you meet falls over himself to be in your presence? Just to be near you?”
I shook my head, trying to get his words out. He couldn’t say these things to me. I realized then, even though I barely knew him, I loved him with every fiber of my soul, as though we were created from the same material . . . but this could never be. I was immortal, and an immortal couldn’t bind with a human. They were sacred to Old Mother. This was forbidden. But from the moment I met him, I wanted to be his. It didn’t make sense, we didn’t even know each other, but I was unable or unwilling to resist him.
“Ashling . . .” he paused. “What are you?”
The question took my breath away, and my body went rigid. I could tell him everything right here, spill every secret, and watch him run away, to never see him again. I could lie and convince him to stay, but then what would we have? A relationship built on lies. I didn’t know what to do.
Without a word to say, I hung my head. Defeated.
He put his finger under my chin, raising my face back up to meet his eyes. “Ashling, I don’t know if you are some sort of goddess sent here to torment me, or if you are sent by the devil himself. I know nothing about you, and yet I feel as though I have known you my whole life. I don’t know how, but . . .” he hesitated.”
“Grey?”
“I love you,” he said.
His words melted any resistance I still had; any sense of duty or reason were gone. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his, kissing him. My first kiss. His lips were gentle yet urgent, and they pulsed with his promise.