Page 2 of The Hero

other-world lookof a physicist grappling with a problem in ionospheric mathematicswithout the use of an IBM calculator. One day he went on Liberty alone.He did not return until the fall of night, and when he came in hiselation was so immoderate that the others thought there must be bars onEngraham after all.

  "I have found the answer to our question," he said.

  No one needed to ask what question. O'Connors hurried to pour Blunt adrink.

  "I have spent the day pursuing this answer logically," said Blunt. "Ihave done what any thoughtful man would do. I have read up on it."

  "How?" cried Henderson.

  "At the library."

  Blunt then described his day: finding his way to the library by means ofpantomime; and finding at last, that file of photographs--photographs ofan utterly self-explanatory nature. And these he pulled from his pocket,for ignoring all discipline, he had stolen them.

  The pictures passed from hand to hand. O'Connors passed them on to Pane,and suddenly felt the need to open the window behind him. It was WillyLanham, the boy from Tennessee, who voiced those exultant words thatrose to the throats of all:

  He said, "Hey! They're made just like the Earth girls."

  The conversation, at this intensely interesting point, was cut short bythe arrival of the Colonel. He alighted from the native Hop-Hop--wavedcheerily to its driver, and began coming up. The bottle and glassesvanished, and Kosalowsky began to read aloud from a book especiallyreserved for these occasions. The men maintained looks of studiousinterest as the officer went through. He went up the ladder to his ownquarters, there to write in his growing volume, THE COMING OCCUPATIONAND GOVERNMENT OF ENGRAHAM. They listened until his door clicked.

  The conversation was resumed in more subdued tones.

  "Do you think," said Pane shakily, "They still _could_?"

  "Not a question of it," Blunt said. "These pictures prove it. It's whatyou might call a lost art. Once upon a time, as with all the fortunateparts of the galaxy, this art was known to the Engrahamites. Throughsome terrific foul-up, they lost it. Probably a combination of thescience of incubation, and the reign of some ghastly square, like QueenVictoria. Thus were the girls of Engraham deprived of the pleasures oflove."

  "The men, too," said Willy. All glared at him reproachfully. To careabout the happiness of the Engrahamite men was thought not quitepatriotic.

  "Gradually," Blunt went on, "they must have begun to lose interest.Probably there was some taboo. In the end they probably all thought, oh,to hell with it, and began serving on committees."

  A long sigh went up.

  "It is for us," Blunt said softly, treasuring each word, "to restorethese unhappy maidens to their original human rights.

  "But it isn't going to be easy," Blunt went on. His voice dropped evenlower. "Think what would happen if it went sour. Those Doctors would getwind of it. We'd be stuck in the Ship for the rest of the Exploration."

  There was a sober pause. Finally Banks cleared his throat and said,"Well, how do you think it should be handled, Blunt?"

  "Well, every beachhead needs an invasion," Blunt said, casually holdingout his glass. O'Connors leapt to fill it. "One guy has got to lay thegroundwork. Let him enlighten one quail. Explain things to her." He tooka long, leisurely drink, and sighed. "This quail will rush aroundtelling the others. Pretty soon there'll be so many hanging around theship that--"

  There was a general rush for cooling beverages.

  "Right," someone said, when the faculty of speech was recovered.

  "And necessarily," said Blunt, "this has to be the guy with the mostsavvy. The one who knows the score. The one most likely to succeed.Check?"

  All knew what this was leading up to. Martin said unhappily, "Check,Blunt, You're our boy."

  ----

  Blunt was scheduled to stand guard the next day, but Willy Lanham, eagerto assist the cause, volunteered to take over for him. The hours seemedto creep by. His air was swaggering and cool when he returned, and allgathered round with eager curiosity--all but Lanham, who had notrecovered from standing guard.

  Blunt sauntered to the bar, accepted a drink, sipped it, lighted acigarette, and took a long, pensive drag. Finally he said reminiscently,"What a doll!"

  Pane, never a subtle man, cried in anguish, "Well, how'd you make out?"

  Blunt smiled smugly. He began his recital. He was walking along thestreet and he met this gorgeous creature. A full description followed(broken by the arrival of the Colonel and two paragraphs of the DECLINEAND FALL) making it clear that this was the dish of dishes, the mostbeautiful of the beautiful, the most charming, and the most intelligent.She allowed herself to be addressed in Blunt's few words of Engrahamicand, smiling ever patiently, sat with him for several hours. Their talktook place in a secluded bower, in one of the many parks. She wasagreeable and charmed and promised to see him again. He even managed,through terrific feats of pantomime, to impress on her the need ofsecrecy in future meetings.

  "That was all?" someone said, when he finished.

  "For the first meeting, I think I did wonders," said Blunt. "After all,sex hasn't been known here since a time corresponding to our Stone Age."

  Later, when the nightly poker game was beginning, Willy Lanham said,"Why didn't you just make a grab for her?"

  "That's the hill-billy approach," Blunt said disdainfully. "These girlsare civilized--very, very civilized. It's important not to shock them."

  ----

  Blunt's next gambit was to set about learning the language. For this hewent not to Flandeau, who best knew it, but to Ankers, who was a purescientist in every sense of the word, and not so likely to suspect hismotives. The girl proved very cultured. She took him to art galleries,to symphonies, and mountain climbing, for scrambling up and down theglassy hills was a favorite Engrahamic sport. As he advanced in thelanguage, he learned that her name was Catataphinaria, which meant "shewill attain relative wisdom". He found that she worked for the Elevenwho, while not rulers, offered general suggestions which the populacemore or less followed.

  Although his slow progress inevitably bored the crew, still, it offeredthat one precious ray of hope, and they became so tractable that eventhe Doctors noticed it. They laid it to the secret ingredient that Dr.Frank had introduced into the drinking water.

  The summer wore on, becoming hotter each day. By the end of the secondmonth of his courtship, Blunt began to speak to her of love.

  She laughed. She said that she had little curiosity on the subject,although it was now and then mentioned by the students of antiquity.Assured that it was pleasurable, she said that she heard that barbariansalso enjoyed murdering people and making them butts of jokes.

  Willy Lanham said, "Don't listen to what a girl _says_. Just make a grabfor her."

  This suggestion was laughed to scorn.

  Weeks passed, the summer began to wane. Tempers again began to shorten.Flandeau said to Frank, "The men are worse again."

  "Yes, perhaps we should increase the dosage."

  The fruits for the Joy-Juicer grew thin on the silvery bushes, and menranged far and wide, putting in supplies for the winter.

  ----

  One night, when Blunt had won at poker, all the men lay in their bunks,too dispirited to drink, to shoot craps, almost too miserable even forspeech. Blunt again began talking of Catataphinaria. Drowsily Lanhamsaid, "I think you're going at it the wrong way, Dick. Try some realrough stuff. You know--kiss her. She might like it."

  Before Blunt could defend his strategy, Kosalowsky sat up in his bunk."Yes, for cripes sake," he said, "Move in for the kill. Or shut up aboutit. You're driving us all nuts."

  "Would you like to try?" Blunt suggested softly.

  "Sure I'll try," Kosalowsky said. He turned on the light over his bunk."Give me a crack at her. I could have managed it weeks ago. All you'vedone is talk to the quail."

  "Yah, Dick, maybe you're using the wrong approach on this one,
"O'Connors suggested.

  "It's the damn places you take her," Kosalowsky said. "Art galleries.Anybody ever seduce a girl in an art gallery? Symphonies. Popping aroundin her damn Hop-Hop. Can't you ever get her alone?"

  "She lives with ten other girls," Blunt said sulkily. "They're all homeall the time."

  "Well, bring her here, then," Pane suggested. "We'll all take a powder."

  "Where?"

  There was no answer. They could not all, by day, desert the ship, and itwas getting too chilly for the crew to hide in adjacent shrubbery. "Wecould put up a wall," Pane said suddenly,
Elaine Wilber's Novels