When she had nothing left inside her, he picked her up as he usually did and sat her on the bathroom counter. She was surprised when he opened a new toothbrush for her. Seeing her questioning look, he said, “I bought you a dozen of these. I know you don’t want to use the same toothbrush after being sick.”
Beth was surprised at how his small act of kindness moved her. His thinking of something so small touched her more than she could say. She gave him a smile of gratitude and quickly brushed her teeth. He wiped her face with a wet cloth and then carried her back to bed. They had developed a routine in the last week. He supported her while she was sick, cleaned her up, and tucked her back into bed. He then curved his body around hers, gently stroking her until she drifted to sleep. He made the sickness bearable and, during those times, she felt cherished.
When she awoke a few hours later, Nick was already up and drinking a cup of coffee. She quickly showered and walked to her closet to pull out a pair of slacks. When she attempted to button them, something happened that almost stopped her heart: they wouldn’t zip. She felt the blood drain from her face as she noticed how tight the pants were. For someone terrified of gaining extra weight back, this was a nightmare come true. Nick walked in the bedroom as she was staring at herself in the mirror. He noticed her look of panic and came to a sudden halt. Alarmed, he took her arm and asked, “Princess, what’s wrong? Are you sick again?”
As tears started to roll down her cheeks, she shook her head no. Still looking worried, he asked, “Why are you crying then? Um, is this a hormone thing?” With another shake of her head, she pointed to the opening of her pants.
“I don’t have a clue what you are trying to tell me. Do you need me to zip your pants?”
“They won’t zip,” she wailed. “I can’t even pull them all the way together.”
A man to the core, Nick said, “Well, just pick another pair. You probably haven’t worn those in a while.”
The tears flowed harder and Beth gasped out, “I wore them a few weeks ago! I’m barely pregnant and can’t wear my clothes anymore. I might as well invest in some big dresses because regular pants aren’t going to cover this ass for long.”
Stepping up behind her, Nick playfully cupped the cheeks of her butt in his hands before saying, “You have one fine ass, princess, and a few extra pounds isn’t going to change that.” When she whirled around and threw her hands on her hips, she could tell he knew he had said the wrong thing.
“So now I’m carrying some extra pounds? Well, thanks so much for pointing that out. I thought maybe my body was just changing from the pregnancy, but now, thanks to you, I know that I’m just overweight!”
Nick threw his hands in the air as if trying to ward her off. “Princess . . . I didn’t mean it that way. I was just trying to say that you are beautiful no matter what size you are.”
“Get out, you big jerk!” Taking off the pants that wouldn’t zip, she hit him dead center in the back as he practically ran from the room.
When he reached the door, he risked a quick glance over his shoulder. “Are you riding to the office with me?”
My God, could he be more clueless? Did he honestly think she would get in the car with him this morning after all of his stupid comments? Deep down inside, she knew he had just been trying to make her feel better, but he had seriously botched it. Still, she needed some space. If she rode to work with him, she would probably force him to take her to McDonald’s and watch her while she ate her way through the breakfast menu. Luckily, she was saved from replying as he took her silence as no and mumbled that he would see her later.
Returning to her closet in disgust, she pulled on a soft jersey dress, which was both comfortable and flattering. She didn’t have the heart to try another pair of slacks. She took a few deep breaths, trying to fight the panic that had been with her since she tried to zip the pants earlier. No one who had never been seriously overweight could understand her paranoia over weight gain. She had worked so hard to get where she was today and being powerless to stop the pounds from piling on was enough to make her feel faint. Maybe she just needed to double her effort to watch what she ate. She wouldn’t let pregnancy be a reason to let herself go. She couldn’t go back to where she was before—she wouldn’t.
Chapter Sixteen
Nick walked into the lobby of Danvers International a few minutes ahead of schedule. He had a conference call at nine, which left him almost an hour to spare. He had been in such a rush to leave home this morning that he had missed breakfast. He was afraid that if he stayed, Beth might stab him with his fork.
He walked over to a private alcove in the spacious lobby and settled on a comfortable sofa. He picked up a copy of Newsweek and thumbed through it without reading the pages. His mind went back to the scene with Beth earlier. Could he have messed that one up any more? He couldn’t understand why she was so upset over her pants not buttoning. He had been trying to tell her how beautiful she was and damn if he didn’t keep sticking his foot in his mouth. What had happened to his magic touch with women? Beth always seemed to keep him off his mark. He could never be “Cool Nick” around her. She turned him into a clumsy schoolboy.
He almost jumped out of his seat when he felt a hand on his shoulder. “Boy, do I know that look,” drawled an amused voice. Nick looked up and cringed at the sympathy in Jason’s eyes. He sat in a chair next to the sofa and said, “So, what did you screw up?”
Jerking his head in surprise, Nick asked, “How do you know I screwed something up? Maybe I’m just relaxing for a few minutes.”
Jason laughed. “Yeah, right. I’ve had my ass in the sling too many times not to recognize the look on your face. I imagine I look the same way when I’m in the doghouse.”
Grimacing, Nick admitted, “It was about her weight gain.”
“Damn. Man, tell me you didn’t go there. You never, under any circumstances, admit to a woman, especially a pregnant one, that you think she has gained weight. That’s a rookie mistake and I never took you for one.”
“No,” Nick defended. “I didn’t tell her that she had gained weight. She was freaking out because her pants wouldn’t button and I tried to reassure her that she would be beautiful at any size. She completely went off the deep end. I thought women dreamed of a man who liked them just the way they are.”
Jason chuckled. “What kind of dream world are you in? You should have avoided the whole conversation. I’d have faked an urgent bathroom trip or whatever the hell it took to get me out of there pronto. You can’t win those conversations. You said, ‘You would look beautiful at any size.’ What she actually interpreted from that statement is: ‘Yeah, you’ve gained a lot of weight, but you have such a pretty face.’”
Nick shook his head in disbelief. “No shit? How do you know all of this stuff?”
“I’ve been there, man. And I have the battle scars to prove it. The first few months of Claire’s pregnancy were rough. She was sick all the time and miserable. I kept trying to cheer her up and just ended up making her cry. I refer to it as the first trimester from hell. When I wasn’t making her sad, I was pissing her off. She alternated crying on my shoulder and slamming the bedroom door in my face. Finally, one evening she asked me if she had a double chin. Just when I was about to give her what was probably another dumb answer, my cell phone rang and I answered it. By the time the call was finished, she had moved on to something else and I had avoided disaster. From that moment on, I used the distraction technique whenever I could. The Danvers household was back in harmony.”
Nick laughed, shaking his head. “That’s unbelievable and a lot simpler than the shit storm I created this morning. Thanks for the advice, man; you may well have saved my life.”
Gray strolled through the lobby as he and Jason were walking toward the elevator. Nick had to admit, it was hard not to envy the contentment that seemed to radiate from Jason and his brother. It was obvious that they were both happy with their lives, maybe even thrilled.
“Good morning.?
?? Giving them a questioning look, Gray asked, “Everything okay?”
With a smirk, Jason said, “Nick took the fat bait this morning.”
Gray visibly recoiled. “Tell me you didn’t! How could you live with Mom for all of those years and not know any better?”
Nick shook his head in disbelief. “I don’t know what is worse here, the fact that you know what Jason is talking about, or having you both laughing at me.”
“Hey, I’ve made that mistake before,” Gray admitted. “Both of you know Suzy well, so you know it was a mistake I will never make again. There is only one answer when faced with any questions on weight: no comment. No matter what you have to do to avoid giving an answer, do it. Suzy is still harping on the fact that I agreed that she was too heavy when she was on . . . um, well, never mind when that happened, just heed the warning.”
Both he and Jason laughed over Gray’s near slip of the tongue. Suzy would probably choke him within an inch of his life if she knew that he had almost spilled on their sex life. As humiliating as it had been to have Jason and Gray laugh at him, he had at least learned a valuable lesson: where women were concerned, less is always more.
* * *
Flopping down in a chair in her sister’s office, Beth sighed dramatically, “Well, it’s official; I’m a fat-ass.”
Suzy propped her feet on her desk and crossed one black high-heeled ankle boot over the other. “Come again?”
“I had to resort to wearing a dress today because my pants wouldn’t button this morning. Nick kindly told me that I was beautiful no matter how huge I was.”
Scowling, Suzy asked, “He said that to you?”
“Something like that. I don’t remember his exact words, but he sure didn’t have to ask what I was talking about. He even patted me on the butt just to make sure I knew what he was referring to.”
“Men are pigs,” Suzy snorted. “They just walk around all day flexing their muscles and loving it when we stare at their ass. The sad thing is that it isn’t just the hot ones. Even the unattractive, out-of-shape ones still think they are hot. Can you imagine Gray, Nick, and Jason sitting around saying, ‘Hey, man, my ass is getting huge’ or ‘Does this suit make me look fat?’ Hell, no, they would never lower themselves to that. Gray looks at me like a deer in the headlights when I ask him anything about my body. It’s not like I’m going to kill him or something if he tells me the truth. But he acts like I’m speaking a foreign language.” Finally noticing that Beth was laughing, she asked, “What’s so funny?”
“I’m still laughing over the mental image of Gray, Nick, and Jason discussing their body insecurities. Instead of asking each other if they look okay, it’s more likely that they say stuff like, ‘Dude, those jeans make your dick look huge.’ They probably meet for lunch at least once a week to talk about what studs they are.” Beth laughed.
Suzy snickered. “I have taught you well. I think it’s time to set you free and let you fly. Oh, yeah, the parents will be over Saturday at five. . . . I bet that brought you crashing back down to earth, huh?”
“God, are you really going through with this? Couldn’t you just send them pictures after the wedding?”
“Hey, it’s not my fault. Gray has really been putting the pressure on me. I guess his parents want to meet my parents. I don’t know why. When they get together and our parents analyze them all evening like a science project, they will be ready to run for the hills. Of course, you and Nick making the whole baby announcement should buy me a few minutes to slip off to the kitchen and down a bottle of Scotch in between courses.”
Beth laughed before her sister’s words sank in. “Wh—what? We aren’t making a baby announcement Saturday night! Are you crazy?”
“Well . . . come on, you might as well get it over with. I figure we wait until Mom and Dad get into one of their long speeches on climate change or fossil fuels and just drop the bomb. During all of the excitement, I offer to get some champagne from the kitchen. Gray will go along to give me a hand and we will lean against the counter on which you had nasty kitchen sex with Nick and drink until we get enough of a buzz to survive the rest of the evening.”
Beth looked at Suzy in surprise and admiration. “Wow, you have really thought this out, haven’t you? You’re willing to sacrifice your own sister to make your life easier. I can’t even go to the kitchen and drink with you, so what exactly am I getting out of this?”
“It’s called taking one for the team—and you are the only one in a position to do it. They already know I’m living in sin with Gray and that we are getting married. They don’t know that their sweet little Bethie is living in sin with Gray’s brother and that she is knocked up. Come on, just think of the entertainment value here.”
Beth shook her head, laughing at Suzy’s logic. “So while I am shocking my parents into speechlessness, what are Nick’s parents doing? Don’t you think they might have some kind of reaction over the news, too?”
“Well, I don’t think they will be surprised, do you? I mean it’s not like Nick is a choirboy or anything. They probably expected a grandchild from him long before now. I’m sure they will just be thrilled that you aren’t paid by the hour or something.”
Groaning, Beth said, “You are terrible. If you weren’t my sister, I would be terrified of you.” As they were both laughing, Claire walked in and plopped in the other seat.
“Ahhh, it’s great to see some people that don’t need diaper changes.”
“Hey, I hope that never happens, but if it does, it’s nice to know that you will take care of it,” Suzy said, smiling.
Claire turned toward Beth and asked, “So since Nick survived the babysitting the other night, does that mean you’re going to give him a chance to do the family thing?”
With a sigh, Beth said, “I don’t know. I still feel like he’s going to cut and run when things get serious. I just don’t know how else to test that theory, short of throwing him out.”
“Hmm,” Claire said. “Let me think a minute.”
“No need to think, I’ve got it,” Suzy announced with an evil smile. “It’s time to commence Operation Clinger.”
With a wary look, Beth asked, “Operation what?”
“Operation Clinger. It’s time to see if Nick can handle having a noose around his neck. So far, Nick has mostly been coming and going as he wants so it’s time to give him a glimpse into the future. You may not be a clingy woman, but fatherhood will certainly put some demands on him. Let’s give him an early preview and see how he handles it.”
Intrigued despite herself, Beth asked, “So how would we do that?”
Claire jumped to her feet in excitement. “You will be the baby or babies, Beth!”
“I will? You two are starting to scare me.”
“It’s time that you became clingy. All of the freedom he takes for granted needs to suddenly become a lot more difficult. You need to be waiting at the door when he comes home and hanging on his sleeve when he leaves. He shouldn’t be able to walk more than a few feet without tripping over you. His swinging single days are over. Let’s see if he is ready to say good-bye to them. If he can survive it for even a few weeks without running like hell, then he might be a keeper.”
“I . . . I don’t know if I can do it. I like my space just as much as he does.”
“Well, if you don’t think you can pull that off, I can let you babysit Chrissy every evening for a few weeks to see if that does it,” Claire offered.
“Um . . . no, that’s okay. I think I can do clingy,” Beth quickly added.
“Okay, get started tonight and let us know how it goes tomorrow. Boy, I wish I could see his face,” Suzy said, and laughed.
Chapter Seventeen
Beth almost laughed aloud when Nick slowly walked through the doorway that evening. He approached her with a wary expression. She had intentionally avoided him all day, knowing it would keep him on edge. Part of her thought she wasn’t being fair to him, but then she remembered the babies she was carry
ing and how devastating it would be for all of them if he decided he didn’t want to be involved later on. Nick was a good guy, but sometimes good guys hit the road when things got tough.
In her limited dating experience, each guy she had once hoped might be different had ended up disappointing her. She always thought if she were thin, they would stay, but was that really true? Seeing coworkers’ marriages falling apart through the years seemed to indicate that even being slim couldn’t make someone stay if they wanted to go. So if they were going to raise a family together she had to know that no matter what, he was going to be here. Maybe she still had issues from her fat days. In her experience, all men left her eventually. She was just somewhere they stopped until something better came along. It would kill her to let Nick into her heart and have him leave her, too. She just couldn’t take the risk. She had to know that he was more than a fair-weather man.
Giving Nick her most charming smile, she patted the couch beside her. “Hey, honey, come sit with me. I didn’t think you would ever get home.” She hid a smile as he looked at her in surprise. The poor man was probably afraid she had forgotten she was pregnant and drank a bottle of wine. As he still looked at her uncertainly, she patted the couch again, saying, “Hurry up, I’ve missed you.” Boy, she must have really been bad this morning if he was so afraid to approach her. He finally walked over and sat beside her.
“Hey, princess. Are you . . . um . . . feeling better?”
Giving him a confused look, she asked, “What do you mean?”
Clearly stumbling now, he quickly said, “Oh, never mind. I just meant I’m glad to see you so happy.”
“Ah, thanks.” Then giving him her most adoring look, she added, “I ordered Chinese for dinner from that place down the street. I know it’s your favorite.”
“That’s great, princess.” He kissed her lightly on the mouth and started to stand. “I’m going to take a shower before dinner if you don’t mind. As you can see, I came straight from the gym.”