“Me, too.” She met his gaze briefly, then looked away. The room suddenly seemed too close, creating an intimacy that caused her throat to go dry. She took a sip. The Chardonnay was cool as it slid down her throat, but still she felt uneasy.
“So tell me about your husband,” he suggested, bringing up a subject that they’d both avoided. She swallowed hard. “What happened?”
Her good mood vanished, and she twisted the stem of her wineglass nervously. “He had a heart attack while boating. Couldn’t get to a hospital in time.” Because his mistress didn’t know CPR. Quickly she took another swallow. She didn’t like to think about Aaron.
“No, I mean, what happened to the marriage?” His voice was low and familiar, and for a second Lesley wanted to tell him everything about her complicated life. She hesitated, and he edged a little closer, so that his leg was only inches from her, his shoulder brushing hers as they were both propped against the couch. “You haven’t said as much, but I get the feeling that you weren’t happy.”
“Oh. Well.” There was no reason to lie, she supposed. Chase deserved the truth. After all, he had saved her life. “It wasn’t a marriage made in heaven, if that’s what you mean.”
He waited, and she drew in a long, ragged breath. How could she explain how youthful exuberance had slowly eroded to apathy, that she’d believed Aaron when he’d said the twenty-year difference in their ages wouldn’t matter. “He, uh, was quite a bit older and had been married before. No kids.” She twisted the wedding band she still wore on her right hand. “He’d been divorced a few years when we got married, and I thought, no, I believed that I loved him and he loved me and nothing else mattered. That was foolish, of course.” She shot Chase a glance and felt her cheeks wash with hot color. “Naive on my part. Eventually we lost sight of each other, and he found someone else. The trouble was, I was pregnant.”
Chase’s eyes narrowed, his lips compressed and every muscle in his body seemed coiled, as if he was ready for a fight, but he didn’t say a word, just watched her through shadowed eyes.
“We decided to try again, to piece the marriage together, because we were going to be parents. I thought that a baby would change everything.” She rolled her eyes at her own naivete´. “I guess I just wanted to think we could do it. We went to a few sessions of marriage counseling. Aaron told the counselor that it was over with the other woman, and I wanted desperately to believe him.” She laughed softly, but the sound was without any hint of mirth. “To make a long story short, it was never the same between us. Then, one day he went fishing. Supposedly alone. That’s when he died.” Her throat grew thick, and she stared at the fire, remembering the pain, feeling the heartache of betrayal all over again. “That was a lie, of course. He was with the same woman that he’d supposedly stopped seeing.” Lesley lifted a shoulder. She wasn’t going to dwell on Aaron and his infidelity. “And that, as they say, was that. So now it’s just Angela and me.” And it was fine. The way it should be. She didn’t need a man in her life. Certainly not one who cheated on her.
“Did you love him?”
The question jolted her, though she’d asked it of herself a thousand times. “Aaron?” She thought for a moment. “In the beginning I thought I did. Now—” she shook her head at the complexity that had become her life; once, everything had been so clear “—I’m not so sure.”
“Doesn’t matter, I suppose,” he said. “I think love’s highly overrated.”
“Do you?”
“Mmm.”
“Sounds like the philosophy of someone who’s been burned.”
“We’ve all been burned. It’s part of living.” He took a long sip from his wine, then, without glancing in her direction, said, “I think tomorrow, if you’re feeling up to it, you can go home.”
“Thank you, oh, master,” she teased, but the joke fell flat.
He didn’t so much as crack a smile. All day long his mood had eroded, and now, near midnight, he scowled darkly, wrestling with his inner demons.
“What is it with you?” she finally asked.
“What do you mean?”
“You haven’t been yourself today.”
“Sure I have.”
“Oh, come on, Chase.” She wasn’t about to play word games. “Something’s eating at you, and I don’t think it’s a great, all-encompassing sadness because Angela and I are leaving.” She shook her head, her hair brushing the back of her sweater. “Nope. There’s something else.”
Twirling the stem of his glass between the flat of each hand, he thought for a moment. “New Year’s Eve isn’t my favorite time of year.”
“But it’s a time for new beginnings.”
“Fine.” He rolled to his feet as if to dismiss the subject, but she was having none of it. Not when they’d been getting so close. “I don’t think the holidays are that big a deal.”
“What is it with you?” she asked.
He hesitated. “Let’s just say I’ve got some bad memories all tied up with tinsel and red ribbon, okay?”
Lesley wasn’t about to be put off. This man had seen her naked, delivered her baby, cared for her and Angela for over a week, taken the time to tend to her stock and house. The least she could do was lend a sympathetic ear.
“What happened?” she asked as he walked to the kitchen.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Why not?”
He reached for his jacket, which was hung on a peg by the back door. “It’s private.”
She’d pulled herself to her feet and gritted her teeth against a twinge of pain in her ankle. Anger propelling her, she hitched her way to the kitchen. “And having a baby and talking to guardian angels isn’t?”
“Leave it alone, Lesley.”
“Don’t put me off, Chase. If there’s anything I can do—”
“There’s nothing, okay? End of subject.” Angrily he shoved his arms through the sleeves of his jacket and reached for his hat. “I’m gonna check on the calves. I’ll be back in a while.”
“It’s nearly midnight.”
He didn’t listen, just yanked open the back door and strode into the night. “You’re running from something, Fortune,” she said under her breath, and decided to wait for him.
She fiddled around the kitchen, cleaning up, then folded clothes at the table. Nearly forty-five minutes passed and she was starting to get worried, when she heard him stomp up the steps to the back porch. A few minutes later he opened the door, and cold air rushed into the room, causing the fire to flare and the candles to flicker.
“I thought you’d be in bed.”
“I didn’t think our discussion was over.”
“Sure it was.” He hung his coat on the peg, and she noticed that his skin was flushed with cold, the pupils of his eyes wide.
“Because you say so.”
“It does take two.”
She saw red. “You know what your problem is?”
“I have a feeling you’re about to tell me.”
She elevated her chin to glare at him. “You’re always the cynic.”
“Maybe I have a reason to be.”
“Do you?” She didn’t believe it for a minute. “Why would anyone with the last name of Fortune be cynical? You can’t really believe you ever got a raw deal in life.” The words were out before she could call them back. “I mean—”
“You mean that just because my last name is Fortune, everything in my life had to have been perfect.” His gaze cut like a laser.
“Well, I—”
“Sometimes things aren’t what they seem.”
“No,” she said, wounded deep inside. “I suppose they aren’t.”
He didn’t answer. Just snapped off the lights in the kitchen. Angela began to fuss, and Chase carried the baby in her bed into the bedroom. He said a gruff good-night to Lesley, and she tried to push aside their argument. She’d dug too deep, it seemed. Chase was a private man, and he wasn’t going to share any of his secrets with her.
* * *
Chase was up before dawn. He hadn’t slept much, and his thoughts, damn them, had been all tangled up in Lesley and Angela. The thought of them leaving today bothered him, and as he rode the fence line, searching for the last five strays he hadn’t located, he experienced a jab of loneliness he hadn’t expected.
“Get over it,” he told himself. Ulysses snorted and tossed his head; the day was bright and clear. He should have been ecstatic to be rid of his widowed neighbor and her daughter. But he wasn’t. For the first time since Emily’s death he felt a ray of hope, a warmth in his heart. “Idiot,” he growled, and pulled on the reins, urging Ulysses up a short ridge to a copse of pine. He sensed that something wasn’t right. His chest tightened. Ulysses balked, then half reared. Chase’s stomach lurched. He’d found the strays. All five of them. Dead.
Happy New Year.
After helplessly surveying the scene, he climbed back in the saddle. Clucking his tongue, he turned Ulysses back toward the ranch house. This was the hard part of ranching, one he never quite reconciled himself with. A nagging sense of guilt chased him down the ridge and back to the barn. He should have been able to save those animals.
* * *
Lesley was waiting for him. Bacon was sizzling in a frying pan, hash brown potatoes warming on a side dish, biscuits steaming from a pan. She moved around the kitchen without much difficulty. She hummed as she worked, only looking up when he opened the door.
“Perfect timing,” she said with a smile, as if their argument the night before had been forgotten. “Wash up and sit yourself down. I figured that since this was my last morning here, the least I could do was fix you—What happened?” Her smile disappeared.
“I found the strays.”
“Oh.” She shook her head. “They weren’t okay?”
“Dead. All of them.” He tossed his gloves over the screen by the fire and unzipped his jacket.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“I know, but—” Her throat felt thick, and impulsively she threw her arms around him. There was so much to him she didn’t understand, so much she wanted to learn. His arms wrapped around her, and he dragged her close, burying his face in the crook of her neck, not kissing her, but clinging to her. He smelled of horses and snow and leather. His body was warm and hard, and she sighed against him. “Sometimes it’s not easy.”
“Sometimes it’s damned hard,” he replied, and, clearing his throat, let his arms fall to his sides. “You didn’t have to do all this,” he said, eyeing the breakfast.
“I wanted to. You know, Chase Fortune, I owe you a lot, and there’s something I want to talk to you about.”
“Shoot.”
She cleared her throat and forked the bacon onto a plate covered with a paper towel. As he watched, she deftly cracked three eggs and dropped them into the hot pan. “It’s about the water on my place.”
“Is there a problem?”
She flipped the eggs, then reached into the cupboard. “There could be.” Handing him a chipped plate, she said, “Dish up. While it’s all still hot.”
“Go on. What about your water?” He pronged several slices of bacon and a pile of hash browns.
“I’ve got a well on my place, but it usually dries up around August, so I use the spring in the late summer and early fall. The spring fills a pond, and I’m able to pump enough water from it for the horses and myself.”
“Is it enough?”
“It’s never been a problem before, but—” Her shoulders stiffened a little as she added, “The spring starts here, on this place, then flows into my land. I have a lease for water rights that the previous owners signed with Aaron ten years ago. But it runs out in June. Aaron claimed that he had a verbal agreement to extend it for another ten years with the previous owner, but I’ve searched through all my papers and I can’t find anything in writing. So...I’d like to renegotiate with you. Otherwise I’ll have to drill another well, and the truth of the matter is that I can’t afford it this year, or probably next.”
“We’ll work something out,” he said, picking up a couple of hot biscuits and dropping them onto his plate.
“Good. I’ll call my attorney when I get settled at home again.”
“You don’t have to call a lawyer.” He settled into a chair at the scarred table and noticed that she’d set out place mats, silverware and a tiny vase with a sprig of holly in it. She filled her plate and sat across from him. A whiff of her perfume floated over the scents of bacon grease and burning wood. He was getting used to being around her, listening to her talk to herself, watching the play of firelight burnishing her hair. He slathered a biscuit with butter and tried not to noticed that her sweater hugged breasts that were probably larger than usual due to the fact that she was breast-feeding. Though she was still a little plump in her mid-section, her figure was beginning to return. She was sexy and earthy and had started to fill a dark void in his soul. A void he’d decided to live with five years before.
He couldn’t get involved with her. At least not now, he thought as he crunched on crispy bacon.
He had too much to do in the next year in order to make good on his end of the bargain with Kate. He couldn’t be distracted with Lesley and her baby. He’d been on that road before, and it had only led to pain.
He glanced at little Angela sleeping soundly in her makeshift bed and felt a pang of protectiveness, but he swept that ridiculous emotion away with a steel-bristled broom of determination. For the next year all he could do was concentrate on getting this miserable scrap of land out of the red and solidly into the black. No one, not even Lesley Bastian, could derail him.
CHAPTER FIVE
“We’re home.” The words sounded hollow as Lesley, carrying Angela in her infant seat, stepped into her empty house. As if sensing a change she didn’t much like, the baby squirmed and let out an irritated cry. “Shh, sweetheart. It’s okay.”
But the old farmhouse felt like a tomb. It was warm enough, the lights bright, but it seemed vacant inside, without that special glow that makes a house a home.
Stop it, Lesley. You’re imagining things. Fool that you are, you just don’t want to leave Chase Fortune, that’s all. Get over it. Setting her jaw, she walked across the kitchen and tried to ignore the fact that she experienced no sense of homecoming, no relief at being home again.
Chase carrying groceries and Rambo were right behind her. “Stay,” Chase commanded the old hound as he was bounding through the door.
“No, it’s all right. He can come in.” Lesley had become fond of the dog and didn’t want him left freezing on the back porch.
“He’s wet.”
“Aren’t we all?” she asked, lifting her eyebrows as she stared pointedly at the snow melting on the shoulders of Chase’s jacket.
Rambo, as if understanding that he was the center of the conversation, cocked his head, then, tail tucked between his legs, slunk into the house and took up residence under the table.
Chase muttered something under his breath about “spoiled mutts who don’t know their place,” as he set a sack of groceries they’d picked up at the local market on the table by the window. He shifted Lesley’s suitcase from one hand to the other. “Where do you want your bag?”
“Just leave it anywhere. I’ll take it upstairs later.”
“I’ll do the honors.” He didn’t say anything else, but she knew he was thinking of her ankle, and it touched her in a way that surprised her. For a rawhide-tough cowboy with a stubborn streak that would give any mule a run for his money, Chase had a kinder side, as well, one she only caught glimpses of.
She tucked Angela’s blanket more tightly around her and set the carrier on the counter where the baby could watch Lesley as she turned on the coffeemaker and put away the groceries.
The coffee was just beginning to drizzle through the machine when Rambo let out a low woof.
Chase’s boots rang on the hallway upstairs.
A truck’s engine
roared down the drive. Lesley peered out the window and recognized Ray Mellon’s Dodge plowing down the lane. Snow was piled on the roof of the cab and inside the bed of the truck.
“We’ve got company,” Lesley said, winking at her baby. Aside from Chase, Ray was the first neighbor she’d seen since Angela’s birth. “You’d better be on your best behavior,” she whispered to the baby as Ray cut the engine and hopped down from the pickup. Wearing a parka, wool cap and insulated pants, he hiked through the snow and stepped onto the back porch. He brushed the snow from his clothes and started to knock, but Lesley threw open the door.
“Lesley, gal!” A wide grin split his face.
“I wondered if you’d made it back from sun country.”
“Just yesterday. The airports were a mess, let me tell you.” He stepped into the kitchen and shook his head. “Look at you!” Giving in to impulse, he grabbed her around the waist, picked her up and twirled her off her feet. “My God, girl, I was worried sick about you and don’t tell me, this—” he cocked his head to the counter where Angela, peering through wide eyes, was focusing on the ceiling “—must be your new little girl.”
“Meet Angela,” Lesley said as he set her on her feet. Her heart was racing, and she felt her cheeks flush.
“She’s gorgeous. The spittin’ image of her mother.”
Laughing, Lesley caught a movement from the corner of her eye and spied Chase, his expression guarded, standing in the archway between the kitchen and dining room. “Chase, meet Ray. Ray Mellon, remember, I told you about him? He’s back from Phoenix. Ray, this is Chase Fortune, my new neighbor and the man who probably saved my life and Angela’s.”
Chase extended his hand, and Ray, after yanking off one of his gloves, grasped Chase’s palm firmly. “Glad to meet you,” Ray said. “You’re related to Kate?”
“Her great-nephew.” Chase sized the guy up as he dropped his hand. About five feet ten inches of wiry muscle, with brown hair beginning to turn silver at the temples and eyes that didn’t linger on any spot too long.
“So you’re ranchin’ the old Waterman place?”