“No,” she insisted. “Besides, I’m not interested.” She wondered if a big red neon light spelling liar was flashing over her head. She was interested, but she suspected this whole attraction thing was just the result of being on the rebound. She needed to take it slow, ease into another relationship. Letting Adam Kennedy sweep her off her feet was definitely a bad idea.
He stared at her blankly. “Interested in what?”
“You. I don’t mean to be blunt or rude, but I felt I should be clear about that.”
“No problem.” He shrugged, his expression unchanged.
“I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“You didn’t,” he assured her and he certainly didn’t look put off by her confession.
“It’s just that this isn’t the right time for me to get involved,” she rushed to add, confused now and more than a little embarrassed. She wished she’d thought this through more carefully. “I’ve only had the business a short while, and all my energy and resources are tied up in it.”
“Of course. That makes perfect sense.”
“This has nothing to do with you personally.” She was only digging herself in deeper now but couldn’t seem to stop.
“Shana, it’s not a problem. Don’t worry, okay? If anything, it’s a relief.”
“It is?” she blurted out.
“We should keep each other informed,” he murmured. “Just like you suggested. Jazmine is a sweet kid, but we both need to be aware of her game plan.”
“Exactly.” She felt guilty about the things she’d said. “I hope I didn’t offend you—sometimes my tongue goes faster than my brain.”
“Not at all,” he told her patiently.
“Good.” It was probably ridiculous to be so worried about a nine-year-old’s scheme and even more ridiculous to mention it to Adam. Thankfully he’d taken everything with a sense of humor.
“Uncle Adam!” Jazmine skated into the parlor and at one glance from Shana, sat down and removed her skates. “Are you done yet? Can we leave now?”
“In a minute.”
“Great!” Jazmine looked about as happy as Shana could remember seeing her. “School’s out for the year.” She slipped on her tennis shoes without bothering to tie them.
Shana’s cheeks still burned with embarrassment and she was eager to see Adam and Jazmine leave. “You guys have a great time,” she mumbled. “Bye.”
Adam slid off the stool and with Jazmine at his side, they ambled out. After the door closed, Shana felt oddly depressed, although she couldn’t name the precise reason. She didn’t want to analyze it, either.
Business was slow for a Saturday, but experience told Shana it would pick up around lunchtime. She had two part-time employees now in addition to Catherine, the retired woman the Olsens had recommended, who was Shana’s most valuable employee. She moved easily between the ice-cream section and the pizza parlor, and she was fully capable of taking over if Shana wanted time off, which was reassuring. This was the one buffer Shana felt she needed now that she was Jazmine’s guardian.
Around eleven, the young father Jazmine had talked to a few weeks earlier stepped into the restaurant. He was without his kids today. He strolled up to the pizza counter; from there he could see Shana in the kitchen, where she was busy stirring a vat of soup. She’d discovered a brand of concentrated soups that tasted as good as homemade and was pleased with the results.
“Hi,” he said casually, leaning against the counter.
“Can I help you?” Shana pretended not to remember him, which was the exact opposite of the way she treated her other customers. She worked hard at remembering people’s names and creating a warm and welcoming atmosphere. She knew his, too—Tim—but refused to acknowledge it.
“I was wondering if you’d be interested in dinner and a movie.”
His invitation took her completely off guard. “I—I beg your pardon?”
“I…well, actually, I was asking you out on a date.” His voice was a monotone now, as if she’d deflated his ego, and Shana instantly felt bad.
“I’m flattered, but—”
“Your niece mentioned that you’re single, and well, so am I and I was wondering, you know, if you’d like to go out sometime.”
Shana wasn’t sure what to say. She hesitated, and then decided she could only be honest. “Thank you. I’m flattered that you’d ask, but I just don’t have time to date right now.” She motioned around her. “This is a new venture for me and I…have to be here.”
He frowned. “Is there any particular reason you don’t want to go out with me?”
A couple of dozen quickly presented themselves but Shana couldn’t manage to get out a single one. “You seem very nice, but—”
“It’s the kids, isn’t it?”
“No, not at all,” she hurried to assure him. “It’s like I told you—the timing is wrong.” That was the excuse she’d used with Adam; it was also the truth. She’d untangled herself from one relationship and wasn’t ready to get involved in another.
“You mean I should’ve waited until you were finished for the day?”
“No…”
He wiped his face. “You’ll have to excuse me. I’m new at this. My wife, I mean ex-wife, and I met in high school and well, it just didn’t work out. I don’t blame her. We were both too young, but Heather’s the only woman I’ve ever dated and—I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.” He looked completely crestfallen by the time he’d finished.
Shana felt even worse. “Under other circumstances, I’d be happy to—” She stopped, afraid she’d just make matters worse if she continued. “Would you like a cup of coffee?”
He nodded and sat down on the stool. “That would be great, thanks.”
“It’s Tim, right?”
He smiled dejectedly. “I’m surprised you remember.”
He’d be shocked at everything she did recall about the last time he’d been in the ice-cream parlor—even if she preferred not to.
Shana made them each an espresso, double shot. If he didn’t need it she did. When she set the tiny cups on the counter, Tim reached for his wallet. Raising her hand, she said, “It’s on the house.”
“Thanks.”
She waved off his gratitude. For reasons she didn’t want to examine too closely, she felt guiltier than ever for rejecting him.
“Can you tell me what I did wrong?” he asked after the first tentative sip.
“It isn’t you,” she said earnestly. “It really is because of the timing. My new business and looking after my niece and everything.”
Over the next three hours, she heard the story of Tim’s ten-year marriage and every detail of his divorce. The only time he paused was when she was bombarded with questions from customers or staff, or if the capable Catherine needed her assistance.
She also learned practically the entire story of Tim’s life. He seemed to need a willing ear and she provided it, between serving ice cream in three dozen different flavors.
“You know, Tim, it seems to me you’re still in love with your wife,” she commented while he was on his third espresso.
His eyes flared and he adamantly shook his head. “No way.”
“Sorry, but that’s how I see it.”
“You’re wrong.”
“Could be, but it’s obvious you’re crazy about your kids.”
He had no argument with that. “They’re fabulous.”
“So—what else can I do for you?” she asked when he showed no sign of leaving anytime within the foreseeable future.
“You could always go to dinner with me,” he suggested.
Shana laughed, knowing she’d be in for a repeat of his disagreement with the divorce attorney. She gave him an A for effort, though. “I thought we already went over that.”
“Are you sure you mean no?” he asked again.
“If the lady says no, that’s what she means,” Adam Kennedy said from the doorway leading into the restaurant. He glared at Tim as if he wanted to teach
him a lesson. His tone was friendly enough, but his demeanor wasn’t. Shana sighed in exasperation. She was all too aware of the interest Catherine and the others were taking in this little scene. Tim was harmless, his self-esteem in shreds following his divorce, and he was counting on Shana to boost his confidence.
“Thank you very much, Adam,” she said tightly, fighting the temptation to say a great deal more, “but the lady can answer for herself.”
To her surprise Jazmine laughed outright. “Hello, Mr. Gilmore, remember me?”
Tim looked as if he didn’t know what to say. He got off the stool. “I guess it’s time to go.”
“Sounds like a good idea to me,” Adam murmured.
“Adam,” Shana chastised, but his gaze didn’t waver from Tim’s face.
As soon as the other man was out the door, Shana whirled on Adam. “That was completely unnecessary and uncalled for,” she said, trying to keep her voice down in deference to her staff and customers.
Adam looked away. “Perhaps, but I wanted to be sure he got the message.”
“And what exactly is the message?” Shana demanded.
Adam grinned as if the answer should be obvious.
“Hands off,” Jazmine supplied. “You’re already spoken for.”
* * *
With her shift over, Ali went to check on Commander Dillon one last time and discovered he was asleep. His face was turned toward her and in slumber his features had relaxed. He looked younger than she’d first assumed.
As she stood there, Ali hesitated, resisting the urge to move closer. She longed to place her hand on his arm, to touch him and feel the warmth of his skin. A chill ran down her spine as she remembered he didn’t want her anywhere near him. That had been made abundantly clear during her last visit.
She wished she had someone she could talk to about the way she felt. This wasn’t something she could discuss with the other women on board. She could be putting her career in jeopardy. Any hint of a romantic entanglement, and she could be in more trouble than she wanted to consider.
Before she left, Ali logged on to her computer.
Sent: June 20
From:
[email protected] To:
[email protected] Subject: Hello!
Dear Shana,
Just wanted to see how you’re doing this week. I think of you and Jazmine every day. I’m doing well myself. We had an emergency appendectomy this week—Commander Dillon. I might have mentioned him before. Before he went under, he seemed to think he might not make it, and asked if I’d look after his affairs. I told him I would, but thankfully that wasn’t necessary. He’s recuperating nicely now. I think he’s
* * *
Ali hesitated, remembering the intense look in Frank’s eyes as he confessed he had no family. What a lonely life he must lead. Divorced and his brother dead. It didn’t sound as if his parents were still living, either. He’d wanted her to dispose of his earthly goods by giving whatever he had to charity. Ali told herself he didn’t have time to ask anyone else; she’d been handy, so he’d reached out to her. Still, she sensed that he trusted her. They were basically strangers but he felt he could speak to her and that she would follow through with whatever he’d requested. Had it been necessary, she would have.
After a moment’s hesitation, Shana returned to her e-mail. She deleted the last three words and began a new paragraph.
Jazmine mentioned that Adam was stopping by on Saturday. How did that go? I know you think my daughter’s trying to match the two of you up and I agree she has no business doing that. But the truth is, I don’t think it’s such a bad idea.
Adam is a good man and while you might have a dozen excuses not to recognize what a find he is, look again. This is your big sister talking here. I mean it: take a close look at this guy. Adam is easy on the eyes (nice but not essential), he’s intelligent and hardworking and wonderful with kids.
I just hope keeping Jazmine for the next six months will convince you that you want children of your own. I can tell how close the two of you are getting just from the e-mails. It’s almost enough to make me jealous!
Your e-mails mean the world to me. Keep them coming.
Love,
Ali
* * *
It didn’t take long for Ali to get a response. She wasn’t sure if it was because of the time difference or if she happened to catch her sister at the computer.
Sent: June 21
From:
[email protected] To:
[email protected] Subject: Commander, you say?
Dear Ali,
No, you didn’t mention anyone named Commander Dillon. What gives? Is he all right? I assume he must be. But the fact that you’re saying anything at all tells me you’re interested in him. This is a development worth watching. I know, I know, all shipboard romances are strictly taboo. But tell me more!
I’m afraid I made an idiot of myself in front of Adam this morning. Trust me, any romantic interest he might have felt toward me is deader than roadkill. I’m such a fool.
All right, all right, I’ll tell you what I did, but you’ve got to promise not to mention it again. I decided he should be aware of Jazmine’s little scheme. That seems only fair, don’t you think?
In retrospect, I still feel it needed to be said but maybe I didn’t handle it in the best possible way. When I assured him I wasn’t interested in him, I came off sounding like…I don’t know what. I keep saying it, but this isn’t the right time for me to get involved. It really isn’t, not with just starting this business.
And guess what? Another guy, who was recently divorced, came in later this afternoon and asked me out. I turned him down using the same excuse and felt terrible. (By the way, it’s thanks to the little matchmaker that he knew I was single.)
Oh, and did I mention Brad phoned? Let me tell you that was a short conversation. If I needed confirmation that I did the right thing in breaking up with him, our conversation was it.
Hearing from you is wonderful. Both Jazmine and I miss you terribly. I never realized how much effort went into being a parent. Don’t get me wrong, Jazz is one fabulous kid and I’m crazy about her, but I didn’t have any idea how much my life would change when she came to live with me.
You’re right, Ali, I’m absolutely certain now that I want to be a mother one day. That’s a bit intimidating, though. With everything that’s happened in the last few months, I’ve pushed all thoughts of another relationship out of my mind. I still think I need to wait a while. Is that a biological clock I hear ticking? Not to worry, I have plenty of time. Lots of women have children when they’re in their mid or even late thirties these days.
Nevertheless, I need a while to clear my head. Adam’s attractive, for sure, and I might be interested in Tim if he wasn’t so hung up on his ex-wife. (Tim’s the divorced father I mentioned earlier.)
Write back soon and tell me more about this commander guy. He sounds like one of those mucky-muck officers. Is that good or bad?
Love ya,
Shana
* * *
Ali read the e-mail through twice and discovered she was smiling when she finished. She wasn’t going to give up on Shana and Adam just yet.
Chapter Eleven
“It’s summer,” Jazmine announced the first Monday after the end of school. “Uncle Adam’s got three days off. We should all do something special to celebrate.”
Shana hated to discourage Jazmine’s enthusiasm, but she couldn’t leave her restaurant on a whim. “Do something?” she repeated. “Like what?”
That was all the invitation Jazmine needed. She hopped onto the barstool and rested her arms on the counter. “When my dad was stationed in Italy, he took me to Florence right after school was out. We had so much fun, and I saw Michelangelo’s David. It’s really cool, you know?”
“We have some interesting museums in the area,” Shana suggested, but her heart wasn’t in it. Given her druthers, of which she
had few, she would opt to visit Victoria, British Columbia. She’d heard it was a lovely city and very English in style.
Jazmine sighed and shook her head. “I’ve been to dozens of museums, but that feels too much like a school outing. This should be special.”
“What about an amusement park?” Perhaps on Sunday Shana could stuff herself into a swimsuit, make Jazmine promise not to take her picture, and they could head for the local water park.
Again Jazmine was less than excited. “I suppose, but I’m looking for something that’s not so…ordinary. Everyone goes to parks. This is a celebration. I survived a new school, made friends and Aunt Shana’s still speaking to me.” She giggled as she said this, and Shana laughed, too.
“We had a bit of a rough start,” Shana acknowledged.
“It took me a while to adjust,” Jazmine admitted in turn. “Uncle Adam helped me.”
“With what, exactly?” She recalled the backpack advice, and the fact that he’d apparently told her to stop matchmaking—hadn’t he?—but she didn’t know what else he’d said.
“Never mind.” Jazmine slid off the barstool. “That’s an idea—I’ll call Uncle Adam.”
“To do what?” Shana asked, but her question went unanswered as Jazmine hurried toward the phone.
“You should take a day just for the two of you,” Catherine suggested, apparently listening in on their conversation. “You’ve been here nearly every day for weeks.”
“New business-owners don’t take days off,” Shana said. It was true that she’d spent every day at the restaurant, although she’d taken brief breaks and nearly one whole Sunday the week before. She’d felt like a new woman afterward. The thought of one entire twenty-four hour period when she didn’t have her hands in pizza dough or her face in a three-gallon container of ice cream sounded heavenly. Getting away was just the respite she needed.
“It isn’t for you as much as your niece,” Catherine continued. “Kind of a reward for doing so well.”
Shana knew she was right. Against the odds, Jazmine had succeeded in adapting to a new school and a new home, and she’d made friends.
A few minutes later, Jazmine set the phone aside and raced over to Shana. “Uncle Adam suggested visiting Victoria, B.C.,” she said breathlessly. “I’ve never been there and he said it’s a wonderful day trip.”