I take a shower first, giving Lia a little more time to recover before handing the bathroom over to her. Mornings are something I enjoy now. This strange domesticity is foreign, but it makes me feel almost normal as I walk into the kitchen to pour us both a cup of coffee. Lia has been setting the coffeemaker at night, something I never bothered to do.
I am reading the morning news when she walks in later, dressed casually in jeans, a t-shirt, and flip-flops. She looks young and fresh. It’s hard to believe she’s the same woman I fucked to within an inch of both our lives less than an hour ago. That is part of her appeal, though, her innocence.
“Well, good morning,” she whispers against my lips as she leans down to kiss me. She takes a big sip from her now-lukewarm coffee before reading CNN over my shoulder. “Just once, I’d like to see the headline, ‘no news to report today, check back tomorrow’.” I chuckle in reply, thinking I’d like to see the same damn thing, but it’s a fantasy that’s never happening for either of us.
Looking at my watch, I know it’s almost time for Sam to arrive. She’s not going to like it, but it’s time to reiterate the rules for today; I’ll happily be the bad guy if it keeps her safe. I pull her down onto my lap, kissing the soft skin of her neck. I grin in satisfaction as she shivers in reaction. “Sam’s on his way. Remember, he drops you at the front door of St. Claire’s and picks you up there, as well. You’re not to go anywhere without him until we know what’s going on with your stepfather.” I work to keep my expression stern, and she pouts like a child.
“Is that really necessary? You need Sam far more than I do. How are you supposed to drive yourself into downtown Asheville today? Have you considered that traffic nightmare?” I am helpless to halt the grin her words bring forward. She’s a sassy little shit this morning, and I’m completely charmed, as usual, where she is concerned.
“I’ve been driving myself around this city for far longer than you have, baby. I’m pretty sure I can handle it. Just do this for me, please. After all, I cannot very well torture my employees and make money while I’m worried about you, now can I?”
Looking completely serious, which I know is a sham, she says, “Good point. I promise to follow the rules, Dad.”
I am in the middle of chasing her around the living room, intent on spanking her beautiful bottom, when a knock sounds at the door. As usual, Sam is right on time. Would it have killed him to be a few minutes late, just this once? Lia…the little wench has the audacity to stick her pink tongue out at me as she opens the door. Sam takes one look at our disheveled appearances and shakes his head, muttering something about refilling his coffee cup. I waggle a finger in her face, lowering my voice to promise, “Just delayed, baby, not forgotten.”
“I’ll hold you to that,” she says against my lips as she kisses me before leaving with Sam.
I quickly gather my keys and briefcase. I have a nine o’clock appointment, and Lia is right, the downtown traffic is sure to be hell this morning.
Chapter Seventeen
Lia
Sam and I make small talk on the short ride to school. We arrange for him to pick me up at the main entrance of St. Claire’s at three that afternoon. Without my car, I plan to remain in the building; I can use the campus coffee shop as a study hall between classes. “I hope having to drive me today isn’t messing up any plans you might have had, Sam.” I’ve taken care of myself since I was old enough to walk, so this feels a little surreal to me.
Sam gives me a reassuring smile in the rearview mirror. “Lia, this is no trouble at all. If I wasn’t driving you, then I would be driving Luc. Besides, your morning conversational skills are much better; Luc generally buries his head in his computer until we reach the office.”
My answering grin says I’m fully aware of how much Lucian loves his morning news and stock reports. The man has a brain like a sponge. After scanning an internet page for a minute, he could probably ace a ten-page quiz on the contents. “Ah, yes, the man does love his technology.” Switching gears, I decide I need to get to know the person I will be spending time with this week. “So, how long have you been with Lucian?”
The affection in Sam’s voice is obvious as he answers. “All of his life. I worked for his father and then stayed on to help Miss Fae after his parents passed away. When he started Quinn Software, he wanted me with him. Gave both me and Aidan a piece of the company from the beginning. Not many men would do that for an employee. I love that boy like my own.”
“If there is one thing I’ve learned, Sam, Lucian is nothing like other men, so I’m not surprised in the least by his generosity.” Holding out a hand to encompass the car, I add, “Just look around. Lucian and I haven’t been together long, but he is doing everything in his power to take care of me. Trust me when I say I’ve never met anyone like him.”
“Luc is a complicated man, but you’re good for him. Like you, he hasn’t had an easy life. For all those people who think money makes everything okay, he’s living proof it’s not always the case. He’s the man he is, though, because of all of those things.”
Before I can stop myself, I blurt out, “What happened to him, Sam? The scar on his neck, the dreams? I’ve heard enough to know it involves Cassie, but she’s almost like a ghost. People talk about her, but then act funny when I ask where she is. If you’ve been with Lucian for this long, you must have known her.” I feel guilty when he shifts uncomfortably and falls silent. My God, what is it about that name that brings such strange reactions from everyone? I have my suspicions, but maybe it’s worse than even I can imagine.
Finally, Sam says, “Have you asked Luc about her?”
“I have and also his aunt. Both just say she doesn’t live here. Well, I already figured that out; otherwise she would be around, right? I gather she was friends with Lucian and Aidan growing up.”
“She was…things were pretty bad between the three of them as they got older. A lot of jealousy, misunderstandings, and mistakes. What Luc said, though, is true; she doesn’t live here now, and he’s better off for it.” Sam expels a breath, obviously remembering another time and place. “Lia, it’s not my place to tell you about Luc’s past. He will, when he’s ready. Just give him time and be patient. You’re good for him, and I’m happy to see him looking more like the old Luc. Wasn’t sure that would ever happen again.”
At once, I feel bad for trying to question someone other than Lucian about his past. I am also intrigued about what little Sam has revealed. A few sentences from him provided insight I hadn’t previously known. I had already concluded that whatever happened to Lucian years ago involved Cassie. More and more, I feel that somehow it was a love affair gone bad. I’m uncertain, though, about the part Aidan plays in the trio. Was he actually the one involved with Cassie, and Lucian the collateral damage, or was it the other way around?
Thinking through the possible scenarios makes my head spin. If Lucian and I were normal people who were newly dating, life would be so much simpler. Instead, we are two people damaged by our pasts that clicked together like dominoes the moment we met. There seems to be no slow speed in our relationship. Maybe Lucian is correct, and things wouldn’t have progressed as quickly if I hadn’t been working in his home, but one thing I know for sure, we were destined to end up exactly as we are now. Two lost souls drawn together by the scars of the other. Are we moving fast? Absolutely. Do I want to stop? No. He has become so important to me; I only hope we can both put our pasts behind us enough to have a future together.
Chapter Eighteen
Lucian
Hitting the intercom button, I ask, “Cindy, is Aidan in yet?” I shuffle some papers on my desk, trying to make a dent in the work that seems to never end. Since Lia has come into my life, I haven’t been working the usual eighteen-hour days, and it’s showing. Perhaps Cindy is right; I need to start delegating more work, which is why I’m looking for my right hand.
“No, Luc, he’s not back yet?”
Surprised, I ask Cindy to come into my office
, which she does immediately, shutting the door behind her. “What’s going on? He always comes back on Sunday.” I can tell by the worried expression on her face that she’s puzzled, as well. Aidan is damn near anal about his routine; deviations just don’t happen, especially when it interferes with his job.
“I have no idea. He emailed me earlier to let me know he wasn’t back in town yet. He just told me to pass that along but didn’t offer any explanations. I forwarded his email to you.” I take a moment to check my mail and read the forward from Cindy.
Cindy is right; his email gives no explanations as to his whereabouts, but I know he’s been to see Cassie and I worry it’s fucking with his head more than usual. I give Cindy a reassuring smile, ready to end her nervous hovering. She is damned efficient, but she worries about Aidan, Sam, and myself too much. She sniffs out problems like a bloodhound. I’m surprised she’s never caught on to my coke addiction. Maybe she knows, but I doubt it; she would have kicked my ass first and staged an intervention next. Apparently, Sam does keep some pillow secrets, probably not to protect me so much as to protect himself. He’d be the second one she’d take apart, since he handles my supply and demand.
“I’m sure he just got a late start home. I’ll give him a call.” Since she’s still giving me a nervous look, I decide to give her a mission. Hell, anything to get her out of my office for a while. “Could you go to Madeline’s office and see when the quarterly numbers are going to be ready? I’ll need those soon to prepare for my meeting tomorrow.” I hide a smile as she immediately snaps into bulldog mode. Poor Madeline; Cindy will be on her all afternoon now, and I really don’t even need the damn numbers. I stay on top of the finances for my company daily; I don’t like surprises where money is concerned.
I click an open line on the telephone and punch in Aidan’s number. It rings four times before going to voicemail. I try texting him next, getting no immediate reply. Aidan never falls off the grid, and he damn sure wouldn’t on a workday. Fuck. Now, I’m right there with Cindy. Something is going on; I can feel it in my bones. I try to push it aside while I return calls from the previous day.
At lunchtime, I decide to have a sandwich at my desk and check in with Lia. I’m not sure if she’s in class or not, so I settle for texting her.
Lucian: Hey, baby.
Lia: Hey, yourself. I was just thinking about you. :)
Lucian: All dirty thoughts, I hope.
Lia: Behave. I have to sit in a boring classroom. I can’t be thinking of that…
Lucian: Why not? I’m sitting in a boring office thinking of nothing but that…
Lia: You can show me tonight.
My cock stirs to attention at her teasing words. I hadn’t been thinking of sex before our verbal wordplay, but thoughts of fucking her have now moved to the forefront of my mind. I want to continue this teasing conversation, but I don’t relish having to jack off in my bathroom after lunch, and that’s where it’s headed. Practicing a little self-preservation, I change the subject grudgingly.
Lucian: So…you made arrangements for Sam to pick you up this afternoon, right?
I grin, knowing Sam’s not far away. I had him stay close to the school today just in case Lia needs him for something.
Lia: Yep, I’m all set. I gotta run, need to grab a drink before my next class. See you later?
Lucian: Of course. See you at home, baby.
I marvel at how easily I refer to my apartment as both of our homes now. This woman has so quickly become my constant. When she mentions staying at her apartment, I firmly nix the thought. I know she doesn’t really want to leave my place, but she feels like she should offer to give me space. Strangely enough, though, I don’t want that space. I’ve grown fond of going home to her in the evening. Hell, I’ve put Cindy on finding us a housekeeper now because I’m tired of Lia insisting on cleaning up after me to pay for her schooling. I admire her independence, but we’re together now; I want to take care of her without strings.
Standing, I toss the wrapper from my sandwich into the trashcan and stroll to my bathroom where I keep my workout clothes. I have a workout room adjacent to my office with a treadmill, elliptical, and weights. At some point each day, I run for several miles then lift weights afterwards. It’s a good way to stay in shape and relieve stress. Throwing on some basketball shorts, I hit the treadmill, going through a warm-up before my feet start pounding the surface. I watch the news on the television suspended from the wall as I pound out the miles.
I finish my workout and shower quickly before redressing. When I sit back at my desk, I pick up my cellphone, seeing I’ve missed a call from Aidan. It’s about damn time; I was getting ready to send out a search party for his ass. I click to return his call and am pleased when he answers on the first ring. “Luc…hey.”
“Hey, man. Where are you? I’ve barely been able to stop Cindy from hunting you down.” Aidan laughs softly, knowing how Cindy is.
“Sorry ‘bout that. I’ll give her a call next so she won’t worry.” When he doesn’t add anything further, my earlier feeling of foreboding returns full force.
“So…what’s going on? We don’t usually have to resort to hunting you. Are you back in town?”
“No.” Just when I think I’m going to have to prompt him again, he finally continues. “Luc…something happened here. I don’t really know what it means, but when I stopped by yesterday on my way out to tell her goodbye…fuck, she knew me. She called my name.” I sag back in my seat, weak with shock. Aidan’s voice is choked, as if he’s overcome by emotion.
“Fuck!” I hiss, feeling a strange urge to end the call and sever the connection. I don’t want to hear anymore, but I need to know. “What exactly happened?”
The sound of him taking a breath fills the line. “I—I stopped to see her after I checked out of my hotel, like I always do. I had been there about an hour, you know, just talking about everything and nothing. When I was leaving, I kissed her cheek and told her I’d see her soon. When I pulled back and started to straighten, she…shit, Luc, she touched my face and said, ‘Bye, Spence.’”
I take a shaky breath myself, wanting to collapse for a completely different reason. Cassie had always called Aidan by a shortened version of his last name. He was never Aidan to her, just Spence. That she had called him something so personal had to indicate some level of recognition on her part. If she had just said bye, I might believe it was just some kind of reflex action. “What else?” Shit, do I want to hear anymore?
“That was it. Luc, her eyes were so clear for a moment. She seemed to really see me instead of looking straight through like she usually does. I tried to get another response from her, but it was like she had blanked back out almost immediately. I spoke to her doctor, and he thinks it’s a good sign. It’s the first time in eight years she’s shown any recognition toward anyone around her.”
It’s then that I hear it. My cocky, self-assured friend is crying. The woman he’s loved for most of his life…the woman who had a psychotic break after attempting to kill herself…and me-the man she professed to love. That night changed our lives in ways the three of us have never recovered from. On that night, the only person she did kill was my son…my unborn son. And the only other person who was there…who tried to save us all, was Aidan. In our twisted love triangle, Cassie taught me what it was to love and in the next breath, she taught me loss, despair, and finally hate.
I feel the need to cry along with Aidan but for totally different reasons. I don’t know if I am ready to handle a world where Cassie might one day be free. I’m just learning to live again with Lia, my beautiful girl. “Aidan…” I begin, just as Max bursts into my office. “Hang on,” I say quickly, pushing the mute button. Raising a brow to my lawyer that conveys my irritation at his unannounced interruption, I ask, “What’s going on?”
“Sorry, Luc, but Cindy wasn’t at her desk. I tried to call you, but you weren’t answering. It’s Jim Dawson; the court released him a few hours ago. He’s out. We should
have been notified earlier, but someone fucked up.”
“Son of bitch,” I snap. “What else today?” Putting the phone back to my ear, I say, “Aidan, I’ll call you back. I need to take care of some things here. Just…we’ll talk later, okay?” Part of me is just relieved to have a reason to end the call. Communicating with Aidan about Cassie is difficult at best. He loves her and I hate her. At what point could we meet in the middle on something like that? The only way I can have a rational conversation concerning her is to think of her as the girl we used to know and not the woman who had damn near killed me.
By the time I end the call, Max is sitting in a seat in front of my desk. It’s never good news when your lawyer feels the need to make himself comfortable. I really just want him gone so I can check in with Lia to make sure everything is okay and also to warn Sam about Jim Dawson’s release. “Luc, about the other matter you asked me to check on.” At my look of confusion, he promotes, “Lia’s biological father.”
“Ah, yeah. Did you find something?” I had asked Max to use his connections when Lia told me she’d never known her father. I thought Lia might need the information one day; plus, I like to know everything about the people close to me. I wasn’t expecting much after meeting Lia’s mother in the courtroom. She was an attractive lady, but what a bitch. I can’t imagine that time has changed much there.
Max gives me a look mixed with equal parts amusement and disbelief. “You could say that. Of course, this would have to be confirmed through a blood test, but my investigator has been able to confirm who Maria Dawson was involved with around the time of her pregnancy with Lia. Luckily for us, she didn’t have a lot of men in her life, so it wasn’t hard to pinpoint it.”