"Susannah is cute," he said.
"I guess she is," I said.
"You want to save the underwear?" Nicky asked.
"Yeah."
I reached back to one side of his body, Nicky echoed me, and we eased the underwear down, baring his ass, but that wasn't the tricky bit. Tricky was easing it off the front of him with him partially erect. Normally, it wouldn't have bothered me that much, but we had just broken up; it seemed weird to be undressing him after having THE fight, like it was a breach of some breakup law somewhere. A last chance at sex I understood, but just undressing him seemed odd.
"Could I date her?" He asked it about the time the underwear spilled off him and he was just there, embarrassingly prominent, but still beautiful. There was no one in my bed who didn't make me pause for at least a second and go, Pretty. Of course, Domino wasn't in my bed anymore, so . . . fuck it, I went back to helping Nicky get him out of his clothes.
"Sure, though I think your last speech to her may have queered the deal."
"Would it bother you if I dated her?"
"You mean because she's almost a friend, or because you're with another woman, besides me and Jade?"
"The last part," he said, as we eased his pants down his legs. He was taking more weight on one of his arms than the other. I didn't think his hands were hurt; it was more that one side of his ribs hurt more than the other.
I thought about it and then said the truth. "No, it wouldn't bother me."
"Thanks, that's what I needed to know."
"Remember, Domino, it doesn't bother her when Jean-Claude is with Envy, either," Nicky said.
I frowned at him. "You're not helping."
"It's just that your being okay with your men being with other women, or other men, doesn't prove you don't care."
I looked at him and let him feel that I wasn't happy with him. I was rid of one person in my bed; I did not want to make this fight up. I wanted to be done with someone, and the moment I thought it, I said, "Shit."
"See?" Nicky said.
"Fuck you," I said.
"Later," he said.
"Arrogant."
He smiled. "I didn't say tonight, I said later. A few days from now is still later."
I didn't know what to say to that, so I didn't try. I could be taught.
"I feel like I just missed a whole conversation," Domino said.
"Nicky reminded me that I'm a little overwhelmed personally right now, and feeling pressured by all the tigers and your prophecy."
"Sorry," he said.
"You don't have to apologize for that, Domino. I'm not sure anyone owes me an apology for it, but when we broke up I felt relieved."
He looked sad, even through the pain. It made me touch his bare thigh and say, "I thought, one tiger down, a few more to go. That's not a good enough reason to dump someone."
"So are we broken up, or not? I'm confused."
"You aren't the only one who's confused," I said.
Nicky started unlacing one of Domino's boots, and I did the other. He was right; we couldn't finish taking off his pants with the boots still on him. Shoes were always the sticking point when you stripped in real life; the trick was to take the shoes off early in the process if you're wearing real pants. Most professional strippers wear pants meant to rip away with Velcro and be put back together for next time. In movies, it's all distraction and stopping the scene a dozen times to change the clothes, so that some scenes it's like five different outfits that look like a single strip scene; it's all illusion. In real life, take the shoes off first.
"What does that mean?" he asked.
Nicky surprised me by answering, "It means that Anita can't be your girlfriend; there isn't enough time or energy for anyone to be a girlfriend to this many people, but she still needs to feed the ardeur and Jean-Claude still needs to feed on blood."
"Neither you nor I let the vampires feed on us."
"I'm going to try it with Jean-Claude."
We both looked at Nicky. "You were very clear on not being food for the vamps," I said.
He nodded as we got the last of Domino's clothes off him. He leaned on the grass, totally nude and a little less excited to be there, but then it had been painful and Domino didn't mix pain with sex.
"I've decided to try it," Nicky said.
"Why?" I asked.
"Because you are going to have to cut your list down, especially if you add another tiger. Keeping lovers who will also feed Jean-Claude is practical, and you can be surprisingly practical in this area."
I was in love with this man, and he thought I might jettison him because I was overwhelmed. I wasn't sure what that said about me; for Nicky it was just part of being a sociopath. If you're not meeting enough needs, why do I need you?
"I don't think I can be with Jean-Claude like that. I've seen him take blood and it's too close to sex," Domino said.
"True, but Jean-Claude respects limits."
"Why not get rid of people that she only sees every once in a while, like Rafael, or the swan king?"
"They're too powerful as allies, and the feeding of the ardeur is part of what keeps them our allies, and it is an amazing power feed when she takes either of them," Nicky said.
"Yeah," Domino said, buck naked on the grass, "it's a rush, like a drug rush."
Nicky nodded.
"We undressed you so you could change form, not so you could discuss my feeding schedule."
"If Jade liked you better, would you be okay with just her?" Nicky asked.
He nodded, winced, got very still, and said, "I would love her if she'd let me, but she's so afraid of men, it makes me one of the bad guys to her, just because I'm attracted to her."
"She's a mess," I said.
"That's not fair," he said, and motioned at me, as if he meant to point, but the moment he did fresh blood spilled out of his mouth, and he began to gasp, as if he couldn't breathe.
"Your lung just collapsed," Nicky said.
"Shapeshift," I said.
Domino collapsed slowly to his side, his breathing so harsh it hurt to hear it. His skin was already darkening around the edges as he fought to breathe.
"Why doesn't he change?" I asked.
"I don't know."
"He'll pass out and then he'll change, right?"
He shook his head. "No, if he passes out he could die."
"What?"
"Vampires don't need to breathe; we do."
"Fuck!" I touched his face and the moment skin touched skin I couldn't breathe. My chest was on fire, and there was one sharp point that just fucking hurt. I was on the ground still touching him; our eyes locked. I stared into those orange and yellow eyes and thought, We're dying.
38
NICKY JERKED MY hand off Domino, and I could breathe again. It still hurt, but it was distant, dull, aching, as if my chest were sore from a days-old beating. Nicky pulled me into his lap and I lay there watching Domino writhe, gasping for air. He reached out to me, and Nicky grabbed my hand, kept me from touching again.
"Change form, Domino," Nicky said.
Jean-Claude's voice was loud in my head as he said, "Ma petite, what is happening?"
I didn't bother talking, just let him "see" what I was seeing. "Shield from him, Anita." He almost never used my real name. "Shield, or he will drag you down with him. I will shield as many of the others as I can."
And he was gone, doing what he'd urged me to do, shielding hard and complete like the walls of a castle newly made, perfect and unassailable. My shields hadn't had six hundred years of practice, and they weren't as perfect as his; I could still feel Domino through my shields, and it was hard to ignore him while he was right in front of me dying. I could feel Nathaniel and Damian the strongest, because they were the first animal to call I'd ever found and my vampire servant. Damian was supposed to be to me what I was to Jean-Claude. I felt the others I was tied to, but Jean-Claude had done his best to shield them from me. I felt them all offering their energy down the leash tha
t held them to me, but there was other power even closer. I looked up at Nicky while he held me. I'd accidentally drained him to death once, and I wasn't joking about the "death" part. The doctor had to restart his heart twice, and no one had been nearly this badly hurt. If he'd been my lion to call I would have been able to feel him giving up his energy, but he was my Bride, which meant the energy flow was one way, and much more subtle. I had to fight through the aches, the fear, worries, all of it, to find a quiet place in my head where I could feel the flow from him to me.
It was there flowing from his skin to mine. I pushed myself out of his lap to fall on the grass and crawl away from his reaching hands. "NO!"
I lay there between the two men, one trying to drain my life away and the other willing to give his. I turned on my side and told Domino, "Change, damn you!"
He stared at me, eyes wide, face starting to change colors the way you do when you're choking. I knew it hurt as much to breathe as it sounded, as he lay on the ground and gasped his life away.
I knew how to call someone's beast. Richard had taught me, and as if thinking about him was enough I smelled forest, thick with evergreens that didn't grow anywhere near this cemetery. I heard Richard whisper in my head, "Anita."
"Help me bring his beast." I said my part out loud, because it was too hard to think inside my head, in that moment. I expected him to argue with me, because we always argued, but he didn't. I don't know if Jean-Claude had contacted him, or if he saw what was happening, but he just reached down that long metaphysical line and poured the warmth of his energy into me. I smelled the musk of wolf, and saw him, the morning sunlight shining through his shoulder-length brown waves with lines of gold and red, all framing that permanently tanned face with its almost heartbreakingly handsome lines. The moment I met his brown eyes they changed to wolf amber and the rush of energy danced along my skin in a warm surge of power. I rolled over and pressed my hand to Domino's shoulder. This time he didn't drag me down into his pain; I shoved power into him, and didn't care that it wasn't gentle, we were out of time for gentle. I slammed it into him the way you'd hit someone's heart with electricity and adrenaline to restart it.
Domino's body reacted as if I'd hit him with real electricity, spine bowing, limbs straining, blood pouring out of his mouth as the ribs ripped through more of his lungs, and then his pale skin rippled like silk over water one moment, and then the next his body exploded in a wave of hot liquid that poured over me, so that I was blind until I used my other hand to wipe my eyes.
A white tiger lay on its side, black stripes crisp and clean in the light, like it had been newly made right this moment. It lay dry and somehow unreal in the middle of the wet grass. It was a white tiger twice the size of a natural one, which made it the size of a horse. I didn't see my lovers in their pure animal form much; sometimes I forgot just how massive they were in this form.
I felt that warm pulse of energy again, and the scent of wolf and evergreen was strong. Richard thought at me, "Is Domino okay?"
I looked at that huge, furred side and waited for it to breathe. I didn't realize that I was holding my own breath waiting for it until the tiger breathed, and I let my own out, and had to take another quick breath to sort of catch up.
Nicky took its pulse inside the leg, near the armpit, the way you do on dogs. He nodded. "He's unconscious, but pulse is good."
"Thank you, Richard, thank you so much."
"I'm glad I could help. Domino is a nice guy. I'll look forward to hearing how he got hurt tonight after the meeting."
"What meeting?"
"Rafael and Micah called a meeting of the local leaders. I'll be over after my last class."
"I didn't know."
"Busy day," he said.
"Yeah."
"I've got to run, hitting the gym before my first class."
"Thank you again, Richard."
He smiled and it was a good smile, if not quite the one that used to melt me into my socks and out of my clothes. "You'd have figured it out."
"But maybe not in time."
"This is part of what the triumvirate is supposed to be for, Anita. I'm sorry that I didn't understand that for so long."
I heard someone say, "Oh my God, it's beautiful."
"Company," I said, "gotta go."
"Tonight," he said.
"Tonight," I said, and cut the connection at the same time he did, so it was almost disorienting. It felt odd to be on the grass, covered in wereanimal goop again, and not standing in Richard's driveway--though I was left wondering about tonight, and exactly what he might expect. We hadn't seen each other much lately. Which probably meant he was dating someone seriously, and I had plenty to keep me busy.
Susannah was standing gazing down at the gigantic tiger with a look of awe on her face. She started to drop to her knees and reach out, but Nicky interfered. "Not a good idea; when he wakes up he may not know where he is for a few seconds. You don't want to startle him."
She looked at Nicky, blinking, uncomprehending.
I said, "Think of him as a combat vet; they don't startle awake well."
She nodded, looking serious, because I knew that one of her ex-boyfriends had let his post-traumatic stress disorder ruin their relationship and his life. I'd heard too much about that failed relationship, too, come to think of it. There was a reason that Susannah and I had never gotten together for drinks and girl talk; I didn't want to know more about her love life than I already did.
"That is a damn big cat," Zerbrowski said.
I nodded. Nicky offered me a hand up and I took it, though I was shaking gunk off my hands and scraping it off my clothes again. Jesus, I was going to need another shower. Nicky was almost untouched except for the knee of one pant leg where he'd knelt to check Domino's pulse.
"How come you're clean and I'm covered in it?"
"I was almost two feet farther away," he said.
"Far enough, I guess," I said as I flung the goopy stuff from my hand onto the grass.
Zerbrowski was grinning at me.
"Oh, just say it, before you bust trying to keep it in," I said.
"This has got to be a fetish, it's like clear bukkake."
I gave him a dirty look. "It's thicker, lasts longer, and doesn't break down as quickly." I scraped more of it off my arms and onto the grass.
"Wow," he said, still grinning so hard it looked like he'd hurt himself.
"Do you need help getting him into your SUV?" Manny asked, gazing down at the tiger.
The air flexed, almost like heat over a summer highway, and then the enormous tiger seemed to shrink in upon itself, and Domino's human body appeared like an insect melting out of an ice cube, until the only thing left was him.
"Wow," Susannah said, and she wasn't remarking on the stuff I was scraping off my face. She was looking down at the still-unconscious Domino almost the same way she'd looked at his beast, like it was one of the most beautiful things she'd ever seen, except this time there was good old-fashioned lust mixed in with the nature-admiring awe.
It was a bad sign that he'd shifted back so quickly and been unconscious through both changes; it meant he was very hurt. Nicky and I exchanged a look between us. We were the only ones standing there who knew it was a bad sign. But two of the people with us knew my face well enough to know it was bad.
"He going to be all right?" Zerbrowski asked.
Manny just studied my face and Nicky's.
I nodded. "Eventually."
"He's easier to carry like this," Nicky said, as he knelt down and picked up the unconscious man. Domino's long legs trailed over his arms, but the rest of him was tucked in close to Nicky's chest, the way you'd carry a child.
"You really are as strong as you look," Susannah said.
"Stronger," he said, and turned to me. "We ready to go?"
I nodded. "Yeah, I'm past ready to get out of this cemetery."
Manny helped me pack my bag up and carried it for me so I wouldn't get gunk all over the nice leather
. I carried two of the long guns, and Zerbrowski carried the second shotgun. Eddie told me that he had a call in to the company that ran this and several other cemeteries in the area.
"Hopefully we'll get a contract for the ghouls, before nightfall," he said.
I nodded. "Yeah, we can hope."
Susannah kept looking at Domino, still very nude in Nicky's arms. She'd catch herself staring and then look away, but her gaze kept going back to him. It was a nice sight, but it was still a little rude. I started to tell her to keep her eyes in her head, but then I remembered Domino asking if I'd be all right if he dated Susannah, so I kept my mouth shut. If they dated, she'd be doing more than just looking at him nude. It wasn't my business, really, honestly, it wasn't, so why did her staring at him like it was a peep show bother me so much? That was the question, wasn't it? Damn.
39
THE THREE OF us that were conscious put on sunglasses against all the morning sunlight. I called Special Agent Manning from the car; let's hear it for Bluetooth actually working. "You want to watch the videos using your ability with the dead, is that what you said?" she asked.
"Yes."
"Didn't you use your expertise with the dead the first time?"
"My expertise, but not my ability."
"Explain the difference to me."
"I looked at the videos like a cop who can raise the dead. Now, I want to watch them with my psychic ability actually active, to see if I can pick up any clues I couldn't see with just my eyes; does that make sense?"
"Actually, yes."
"I'd like to include a second animator for this second viewing, Manny Rodriguez."
"He's the animator who trained you originally; we're familiar with him." She said it like the words meant more, like she'd checked into him in a more than typical way. I let it go with him sitting in the car with me, since I hadn't mentioned that I was making the call on the Bluetooth so that everyone in the car could hear it. I would ask later, though.
"Can he be my second set of eyes on the viewing?"
"No, Marshal Blake, he can't be."
"If I asked why not, would you answer me?"
"You know that he was an intimate of Dominga Salvador, whom you've described as one of the most evil people you've ever met."
It was hard not to look at Manny, but I managed. "I'm aware of Manny's past."
"Then you can understand why we don't want him involved on this case."