“What do you mean?” Archer asked.
“Lily asked me to show you,” she replied. “That’s why I’m here.”
“By all means,” Archer told her, waving to the recording booth.
Keith wanted to argue. He wasn’t even sure why. He just didn’t want to believe that Sydney was the answer to their problems. She was a quiet, conservative school teacher. What the hell did she know about popular music?
Still, he watched through the observation glass as she entered the recording booth. She glanced around and spotted his old acoustic propped up in one corner of the room. The only people he had ever allowed to touch that guitar were Archer and Xander, so everyone in the band glanced at him now. He could admit his curiosity outweighed his protectiveness of the guitar at the moment, so he let it ride.
Sydney used the strap to hang the guitar over her shoulder, adjusting it so it rested more comfortably to play. She then gave it a strum to check the sound. Keith was reluctantly impressed that she seemed so comfortable with it.
As she competently worked her way down each string to test the pitch, he prepared to have to step in and help her. The fifth string was notoriously tricky. Archer and Xander bitched about it any time they used the instrument.
But Sydney knew what she was doing. She didn’t even use a tuner, going strictly by ear to get each string where she wanted it. When she fiddled with the fifth string and got it perfectly in tune, he felt the sensation of her strumming it like a physical stroke all the way through his body.
Holy shit.
“Sage, we’ll want to make sure this is recorded,” Lily said. “Think creatively on it. I’m sure you’ll know where I’m going with this.”
“On it,” Sage said, moving over to confer with the producer sitting in front of the studio’s recording equipment.
A moment later, Sydney stepped up to the filter in front of the microphone and closed her eyes. Keith watched her take a couple of deep breaths as though to center herself. Once she was ready, she opened her eyes and began to play.
He recognized the opening strains to Leonard Cohen’s “Halleluiah.” How could he not? It was one of the most iconic songs in all of music. But it was so far outside of The Void’s genre it was laughable. He was irritated that Lily and Sydney were wasting their valuable recording time trying to force them into a direction that wouldn’t work.
Then Sydney started to sing.
Her voice was the embodiment of Sydney herself. It was beautiful, it was pure, and it was genuine.
As she finished the first verse and made her way through the series of “Halleluiahs,” Keith realized his breath was stuck in his throat. He slowly released it as she transitioned to the second verse.
No one moved or made a sound. They were all transfixed. It jogged a memory in Keith’s mind. Jeff Buckley, one of the most well-known performers of the song, used to end his performances with it. The song would bring the previously energetic crowd to complete silence...a sort of reverence.
And he finally got it.
Sydney finished the second verse and transitioned to the third. As she got to the “cold and broken Halleluiah,” there was such feeling infused in the line that the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Noelle rubbing her arms as though easing goosebumps.
When Sydney reached the last verse, her eyes lifted and met his. It was like she knew the entire time that he was standing right there watching her.
She sang about believing there was a God above. She sang about having learned hard lessons from love. She sang again about the cold and broken Halleluiah.
And he knew she was singing the verse about him. She was saying that he had left her cold and broken.
He forced himself to ignore the dull pain that caused. It wasn’t his fault if she’d had no more sense than to develop feelings for him, for God’s sake. What the hell did he know about a woman’s heart?
Keith saw Lily wipe a tear from her cheek as Sydney sang the final Halleluiah. She pulled her glasses off and Archer took them, cleaning them with his cotton T-shirt without her asking him to.
Noelle and Xander started discussing Sydney’s performance. Sage waited for the producer to signal the all-clear and immediately started talking with him about some of his ideas.
Keith watched Sydney carefully remove the guitar and place it back in its stand. Archer walked over to the door of the booth. He grabbed Sydney’s shoulders as she emerged and placed a resounding kiss right on her mouth.
Keith almost stepped forward. He stopped when he saw Sydney’s answering smile.
“That was absolutely brilliant,” Archer told her. “Where the hell did you learn to sing like that?”
“Twelve years of church choir,” Sydney replied. “But it sure never got me kissed like that.”
Archer laughed and tugged her fully out of the booth. “Come on and listen to what Sage cooks up. Lily, have I told you how much I love you?”
“Only twice so far today,” she replied as she hunted in her purse and pulled out a roll of Cherry Life Savers. “You’ve been slacking.”
Archer immediately moved over to her and encircled her with his arms, dipping her down and kissing her far more thoroughly than he had Sydney. “There,” he said when they parted. “I love you.”
Lily smiled as he returned her to her feet. “Just for that, I’ll share my Life Savers with you.”
“Wow. Red letter day.”
Archer was so natural and open about his love for Lily, Keith thought. He looked so damn happy. It was such a contrast to Keith’s currently dark mood that he found himself wanting to say something to bring Archer down. When he realized that, he shoved his hands into his pockets and bit his tongue, pretending that he didn’t smell Sydney’s vanilla and cinnamon fragrance floating over to him from just a few feet away.
Sage worked on his laptop with his headphones on for about fifteen minutes. Everyone conversed around him, but Keith remained silent. His gaze continued to drift to Sydney, who had taken a seat beside Lily and Noelle on the only couch in the room. They were talking about their plans for the day. Sydney mentioned she was on her way to the beach, telling Keith why she was dressed like she was.
It also conjured up some rather tortuous images of her in a bathing suit.
“Okay,” Sage said, causing everyone to quiet down. “This is just a rough run, of course. But I think we’ve got it, guys.”
Of course he was right.
“Miracle Worker” was a song about someone overcoming incredible obstacles to be with the one they loved. “Halleluiah” was about instability in relationships and the pain they could cause. The dichotomy in the tones and lyrics shouldn’t have worked, but they paired perfectly. Archer’s interpretation of the “Miracle Worker” lyrics was balanced beautifully by Sydney’s soulful treatment of “Halleluiah.”
By the end of the song, they were all nodding. They knew they had finally nailed it.
“V, you’re a god,” Archer declared after the song ended, calling Sage by the shortened version of his band nickname, Virtuoso. “This is it, guys. Right?”
The agreement was enthusiastic and unanimous. Even though Christopher hadn’t been able to attend the session, they were sure he would concur.
Archer turned to Sydney. “Are you okay with making a guest appearance on the album?”
She smiled. “I’d be honored.” She got to her feet. “I’ve got to get going now. Do you need anything more from me?”
She didn’t even ask about being compensated. Keith knew she never would.
“No,” Archer said. “You’ve done more than enough. Thanks again for being willing to help us out.”
Everyone else added their thanks. Keith, figuring his wouldn’t be welcome, remained silent.
“Any time.” She picked up her purse and glanced at Lily. “You’re going back to Archer’s after this, right?”
“Yeah,” Lily replied. “Have fun at the beach. I’ll see you tomorrow.??
?
“Thanks.”
Keith’s gaze followed her to the hallway leading back to the studio’s main lobby. She hadn’t looked at him, he thought. Not once except for while she was singing that single verse.
Why did that have him feeling worse than if she’d screamed at him?
Ignoring the others, he started after Sydney. He had to ask her about seeing Lex the next day. And if she had some idea that she was going to avoid him for the rest of her life, well, she was damn wrong about that.
He didn’t see her when he reached the lobby, so he shoved through the front doors. He had to blink against the brighter outside light even though it was overcast. It took him a second to realize that a car had pulled up about fifteen feet away near the curb. Sydney was walking around the car to get into the passenger seat. The driver was a guy Keith supposed females might find attractive if they went for perfect hair and teeth and ridiculous biceps.
Sydney was going to the beach with him?
“Sydney,” he said loud enough to have her looking up at him with wide eyes. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”
“Uh, sure.”
She placed her purse on the front seat and closed the door so she could approach him. As she passed in front of the car, Keith had a stare-down with the car’s driver. He only looked away from the guy’s level stare when Sydney stopped a few feet in front of him. She just tilted her head and waited for him to speak.
“Who the hell is that?” he asked.
That hadn’t been what he wanted to ask her. There was no taking it back, though.
“That’s George.”
“And he’s taking you to the beach.”
“For starters,” she confirmed.
His jaw flexed. “Are you trying to make me jealous?”
Looking truly baffled, she said, “Why would you be jealous? You don’t want anything to do with me.”
He stiffened as his words boomeranged back to strike him in the solar plexus. You don’t want anything to do with me.
What the hell was wrong with him?
“Besides,” she continued, “if I even thought you’d get jealous by me going out with a guy, do you really think I’d leave him out here in the parking lot all this time? How was I supposed to know you’d follow me out here?”
She had him there.
Feeling like a prime ass, he muttered, “Never mind. I came out here to ask you if you would attend a lunch tomorrow at Archer’s house with me, Lily, Archer, and Lex before the band leaves on the next leg of the tour. I promised Lex I’d ask.”
She blinked as she processed his request. “Oh. Of course. What time?”
He just didn’t get her. He had said such horrible things to her for reasons even he didn’t fully understand. She had no reason to agree to do this. She should be telling him to go to hell and getting as far away from him as she could. Yet she agreed as though it never even occurred to her to try and punish him by saying no.
“Noon,” he said. “It’ll be outside by the pool, so you might want a swimsuit.”
She smiled. “How fun. What can I bring?”
The odd feeling in his chest intensified over her genuine enthusiasm for the idea. “Nothing,” he said. “Lily and Archer have it covered.”
“Everything all right, Syd?” the guy called from the open car window, making Keith frown.
“Yeah, George,” she called back to him. “I’m coming.” Looking at Keith, she said, “I’ll get with Lily and see you tomorrow then.”
He reached out and stopped her before she could leave. “Wait. Sydney, who is this guy?”
Removing her arm from his grasp, she replied, “He’s someone who wants to be with me.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Sydney’s heart thundered in her chest as she turned from Keith with those parting words and got into the car.
“Drive,” she said.
“You got it,” George replied, reaching over to put an arm over the back of her seat as he guided the car out of the parking lot. “Was that him?”
“Yeah.”
“Hot damn. You really didn’t do him justice. He has that broody and intense thing really working for him.”
“Well he’s straight, so you’re out of luck.”
George clucked his tongue, making her smile. He was her cousin—the very one who had taken her to her senior prom—and a very dear friend. They bonded years ago over being seen as black sheep in their families, him for being gay and her for going away to college rather than marrying a good man in Bakersfield and starting a family like her parents wanted. George was the one who had helped draw her out of Bakersfield, inviting her to room with him while she got her first year of college under her belt.
When she had called him the day before to say she needed a day away from her life, he had dropped everything for her. She appreciated it more than words could say. She had been feeling so bereft.
She’d even broken down and called her parents just to feel connected to someone who loved her. The call had only served to depress her more. Her parents had lasted ten minutes before asking her when she was going to give up on her idea of exploring the world and come back home to meet the perfect guy they had found for her.
The saddest thing was she almost considered doing it.
Lily had tried her best to get her to talk about what was troubling her, but Sydney hadn’t felt there was any point in creating ill feelings between Lily and Keith. Lily would see him all the time. Sydney hadn’t expected to see him again outside of this single studio session.
She wasn’t quite sure what to think about seeing him again the next day. On the one hand, she never tired of looking at him and he was so sweet with Lex. She knew they would have fun.
On the other hand, just being near him was complete and utter torture.
She had tried really hard to work up a head of steam towards him before the studio visit, hoping it would keep her from hurting so much. It hadn’t worked.
Yes, what he’d said had been harsh, cutting, and unnecessary. And anger was certainly one of the emotions she felt towards Keith. But there were too many others for her to be able to hold onto just that one.
“You okay over there?” George asked.
She leaned her head back against the headrest and felt his arm there. She knew his stern expression and the arm over the seat thing had been done for Keith’s benefit.
“Not really,” she admitted. “But thanks for helping me save face.”
“Anything for you. Did I sound hetero enough?”
She found a smile. “Totally butch. I’m sure he has a man crush on you now.”
“Don’t tease. Now you have to tell me why I’m supposed to hate him. We’ve still got a drive until we get to Ray’s.”
She told him everything. He listened, making sounds of support or sympathy when appropriate. When she got to the kiss, he sighed.
“You’re killing me, Syd. Cotton candy and root beer?”
Another fleeting smile crossed her face. “It was perfect.”
“He sounds too perfect. We’re to the bad part now, aren’t we?”
“Yeah. He didn’t like the kiss.”
George gave her an incredulous look. “He said that?”
“Well, no,” she said with a thoughtful frown. “But he said he hadn’t wanted to kiss me. He said it was all a mistake. He said...”
“What?” he prompted when she trailed off.
She didn’t want to tell him. It was so painful, so humiliating that it had kept her up nearly every night since Keith said it. But she and George had always shared everything.
“He said he doesn’t want to be involved with a woman whose only experience with sex was at the hands of a guy armed with a date rape drug.”
George didn’t immediately reply. She expected him to jump to her defense and rail about how off-base Keith was. His silence prompted her to look over at him.
“You told him about Wes?” he said eventually, his eyes still on the road.
r /> “Well, I told him about drinking too much that night.”
He sighed again. “Oh, Syd. I tried to tell you. You didn’t want to listen.”
Her throat tightened. “You actually believe what Keith said? You think that Wes...that he...?”
“Yes,” he said softly.
She couldn’t speak. Pain speared up from her stomach to grab her around the throat. In that instant, she realized that this was what had kept her up at night.
Because she had believed Keith, too.
“I’m sorry, honey,” George said, reaching over and taking her hand as the tears started to spill from her eyes. “Keith should never have said that to you, not like that. Not at all, for that matter.”
Keith had only spoken the truth, she thought. It wouldn’t have made it any less awful if he had prettied it up for her. Prettying things up wasn’t his style.
She’d known on some level. Of course she had. Since that night, she hadn’t had an alcoholic drink. She didn’t accept beverages unless they were handed to her by a bartender or waitress or served to her in a sealed container. If she ever had to leave her drink with someone she didn’t trust, she didn’t sip it again.
Oh, yes. She’d known. She just hadn’t had the courage to face it.
Did knowing it now, accepting it now, change her life in any way?
She didn’t know.
Wiping her eyes with a napkin from George’s glove compartment, she asked, “Is that why you assaulted Wes after he broke up with me?”
“I don’t recall doing anything of the kind.”
She gave him a knowing look. “You put him in the hospital.”
“Doesn’t ring a bell.”
“You blackened both of his eyes, knocked out one of his teeth, broke several ribs, and bruised his spleen.”
“Didn’t he tell the cops he fell down some stairs?”
“Your knuckles were nicked and swollen when I saw you the next day.”
“Utter coincidence.”
She shouldn’t feel better about someone getting hurt as badly as Wes had been, but she did. Her grip tightened on George’s hand.