“Do you know who is claiming her?” Perhaps it was a grandparent or an aunt or uncle. In that case, perhaps her own claim would be stronger.
“Her father.”
Bessie’s heart sank. “You are the only father she knows!”
“I know.” There was a world of heartbreak in the heavy words.
She clutched him. “You have to think of something, Jasper.”
“There is nothing, Bessie. We have to go to the hearing and present the strongest case we’re able to make. We’ll gather witnesses who will testify of our love for her and the care we’ve given. We will leave it in God’s hands. His will be done.”
His will be done. The words sounded final and frightening. She tried to pray, but the words wouldn’t come. Was it only moments ago she had been reflecting on how very blessed and fortunate she was? Tears burned her eyes.
Jasper pressed his lips against her forehead. “We’ll get through this, Bessie. Somehow, we’ll get through this.”
When he left her, she tried to think, to plan, but she was too numb. Tears finally fell, and when Eve came, Bessie was sitting at the table sobbing.
Eve shut the door behind her. “Bessie, what is wrong?” At the concern in her friend’s voice, the tears began again.
“Ruthie’s father is laying claim to her.”
Eve was silent. “I feared this would happen. It has become common knowledge that a white woman at Fort Bowie found a baby in the desert and adopted her. Children are precious to the Navajo.”
“We need people who will testify that we love her and have cared well for her. Would you be our advocate?”
“Of course, my friend. And I know Ben will also say how he found Ruthie and how your Jasper was searching for her.” She laid a hand on Bessie’s shoulder. “Do not despair. Our God is in control of this. We will pray for His will.”
“But what if His will is to take Ruthie from us?”
“Then that is what is best for Ruthie.”
Bessie couldn’t accept that. What was best for Ruthie, for all of them, was for their family to stay together.
The week dragged by. Bessie spent every moment with Ruth and drank in every expression of delight, every moment of joy. It was a bittersweet time that made her appreciate her daughter even more.
A pall seemed to hang over the fort, too. The men loved the baby, and they stopped by at odd times to offer their help if there was anything they could do. Bessie or Jasper thanked them and even asked one or two to testify on their behalf. Rooster would testify, as would the colonel.
Bessie dressed carefully in her best dress. The blue fabric brought out the color of her gray eyes. She wanted to look competent enough to care for the needs of a child. Jasper looked splendid in his freshly-brushed uniform, but his eyes were sober. She knew hers were full of fear. She had seen it when she brushed her hair.
Jasper handed her up onto the buckboard, and a group of twelve soldiers escorted them out of the fort. The Indian agent’s office was about five miles away.
If the circumstances had been different, Bessie would have enjoyed her first excursion outside the confines of Fort Bowie in six months. Just to see different cactus and scrub was a treat. They bounced along the rutted track, and she tried to remember all she wanted to say. She must not lose her temper or her composure. She had to convince them that the baby would be better with her.
She snuggled Ruthie close and tried not to imagine the return trip if she had to give her up. It couldn’t happen. There was no way any man would require Ruth to return to a father she had never known.
All too soon they stopped in front of the agent’s quarters, a square adobe structure with several Indians milling around. Bessie caught sight of Eve and raised her hand in greeting. The man beside her must be Ben. They both smiled a lopsided smile.
Jasper took the baby and helped Bessie down from the buckboard. She took Ruth from him and followed him inside. There were several Indians inside as well as a man in his fifties with graying hair and a handlebar mustache.
“McCloskey, the Indian agent,” Jasper whispered.
He looked like a reasonable man. Bessie sent him a tiny smile, which he returned. She didn’t have many feminine wiles, but she intended to use what few she had to keep her baby.
Glancing around the room, she was surprised to see Black Will, the young Navajo who had taught the men construction techniques. He stood with a group of three other Navajo men and two women. One of the women, a beautiful young woman of about twenty-five, sent her a glare of dislike. The other, an older woman with graying hair, nodded politely in her direction.
“I think we’re all here now,” McCloskey said ponderously. “Please be seated, all of you, until you are called to tell your side of the story. Let’s hear from the man laying claim to the child.”
One of the young men with Black Will stepped up. “I am called Thomas by the white man. The child is mine.” He was tall and well-built with a self-confidence unusual in an Indian.
His quiet, confident demeanor caused Bessie’s heart to sink. She should have known the man who would father a darling like Ruth would be someone with whom to reckon.
“What proof do you have?”
“I have those who will testify where the child was found as well as the family birthmark she carries on the inside of her knee. It matches the one on mine. My mother is here to swear that the woman was my wife, and that we were legally wed according to our laws and lived together as man and wife.”
How did he come to speak such perfect English? Bessie had to wonder about him.
“Bring forward your witnesses.”
His mother testified first of her son’s marriage and his wife and the love they shared. She told of their joy when they found they would have a child.
“How did the mother come to give birth in the desert?” Agent McCloskey asked.
“She was on her way to gather supplies and was set upon by Apaches. They took her wagon and left her in the desert. The shock brought on her labor,” Thomas explained quietly.
“How do you know this?”
“My brother found my wagon and persuaded the thief to tell the story.” He smiled grimly as he gestured to Black Will. “Black Will is my brother.”
The agent cleared his throat gruffly. “I see.”
Then the Navajo who had been their guide told how the baby had been found by Jasper and Bessie. He had seen the dead woman with his own eyes and testified as to the clothing she had been wearing. He had taken the grieving husband to her grave and he had identified the clothing as belonging to his wife. “My brother saw the child’s birthmark with his own eyes.”
The chips were stacking up against them. Bessie could feel the panic rising. When did she get to plead for her daughter?
Abruptly, the agent turned to Jasper. “Have you anything to add to this, Lieutenant? The evidence seems pretty clear.”
Jasper stood and cleared his throat. “Yes, Sir. We freely admit we found Ruth. We have loved and cared for her these seven months as if she were our own child. Indeed, we feel she is our own child. We could not love her more if she was our own flesh and blood. We ask you to think of her welfare also. We can give her many advantages and much love. We have several witnesses who can testify that we have given her excellent care.”
Agent McCloskey waved his hand. “That won’t be necessary, Lieutenant. I’m sure you and your wife have been good caretakers. But this child belongs to her father, and since you are not disputing that fact, I have no choice but to order her be given back to him.”
“No!” Bessie sprang to her feet. “You can’t. Think of Ruth. We’re the only parents she knows. She’s too young to understand. Please, you must not do this.” She began to weep, wringing her hands. How could she make them understand? She turned imploring eyes to the young father. She thought she saw compassion in his eyes, and she took a step toward him.
Jasper put a restraining hand on her arm. “Bessie, don’t. It’s no use.”
&n
bsp; She shook off his hand. “I can’t let them take her. Please, Jasper.” She turned back to the agent. “Please don’t do this, Sir. She’s our baby. We love her so much.” Sobs wracked her body, and she held Ruth close.
“I’m sorry, Ma’am. I have no choice.” He turned back to Thomas and his family. “You may take the child.”
Bessie whirled and would have fled with Ruth, but Jasper stopped her. Thomas walked slowly toward them, then turned back and faced agent McCloskey. “I will give Lieutenant Mendenhall and his wife two days to say their good-byes to my daughter and prepare for the separation. I do not wish to cause them any more harm. I am grateful for their care of my daughter.” His eyes were full of compassion when he turned and faced them. “I will come for her in two days. Please have her ready.”
He walked away, and Jasper took Bessie’s arm and half carried her to the waiting buckboard. She was dazed. This couldn’t be happening. She fought the feeling of lightheadedness and stumbled along as best as she could. She saw the shocked faces of her friends as she passed. Eve moved as if to go to her, but Ben restrained her.
Jasper helped her into the buckboard and climbed up beside her. They were silent with shock and sorrow as the buckboard lurched along. Bessie stole a glance at her husband. His jaw was set, and his face was white.
“How could he do this, Jasper? I don’t understand how this could happen.”
“I feared the worst. I think the agent felt he had to keep the Indians appeased. We have enough trouble with the Apache without riling the Navajo. And as her father, he does have a right to her. Think how we would feel in his place.”
Bessie shook her head. “Let’s just go, Jasper. Just keep driving until we reach the stage stop. We’ll go to California or back to Fort Bridger. Somewhere they’ll never find us.”
“The army would find me, Bessie. I would be a deserter.”
She had forgotten that. But there must be somewhere they could go.
“What are we going to do?”
He sighed heavily. “We have no choice, Bessie. We must give Ruthie back to her father.”
She was shaking her head before he even finished. “You’ve never been a quitter, Jasper. Why are you giving up now? We can’t give her back. We just can’t.”
He stopped the buckboard and turned to face her. “You have to stop this, Bessie. We have no choice. None. I would give anything if we could keep her with us. But the fact is that she is that man’s daughter, the child of his own body. What if your true child had been lost to you and you found she was alive and living with another family. Would you want her back?”
She stared at him. She would want her child back. Could she blame Ruth’s father for wanting what any father would desire? Hopeless tears leaked from her eyes, and she buried her face in her hands.
They finished the trip in silence. Bessie wished she could just die. How was she to face that man when he came to her door? How could she hand Ruthie into his arms? She closed her eyes and moaned.
When they reached their quarters, Jasper helped her down. “I need to report the decision to the colonel. I’ll be in shortly.” He hugged her gently and hurried across the parade ground.
She carried Ruth inside and laid the sleeping child in her crib. Soon that crib would be empty; soon her arms would be even emptier. She dropped onto the cot in the living room and buried her head in her hands. She couldn’t bear it. Why did God allow something like this to happen? Could this really be His will? She didn’t understand; she couldn’t begin to think of any way this could be the right thing. Was it only her own will that made her so certain?
Neither one of them could eat supper. Jasper just picked at his stew, and Bessie didn’t even try to eat. She felt if a single morsel passed her lips, she would throw up. Ruthie was particularly adorable that evening. She giggled and pulled on Jasper’s pant leg. She blew bubbles at Bessie and gurgled. Every time she babbled what sounded like Mama or Dada, they winced. It was all Bessie could do to keep her composure throughout the evening.
The next two days were bittersweet. The fort commander gave Jasper the time off to spend with his family. They took Ruth for walks, gathered the clothes Bessie had so lovingly made, and spent time just holding the baby. Bessie told her she was going for a nice visit with her daddy, but that they would always love her.
The knock on the door came too soon. Bessie held Ruth’s soft body against hers and trembled. She couldn’t do it. Praying for strength, she nodded to Jasper to open the door. His face white, he walked to the door and opened it. Thomas and his mother stood on the stoop.
“Come in,” Jasper said. “The baby is ready, but I can’t say we are.”
The Navajos did not answer that comment but stepped inside. Ruth’s grandmother smiled at the baby, then her grave eyes met Bessie’s.
“Again, I thank you for all you have done for my daughter,” Thomas said. He approached Bessie with Ruth in her arms and spoke softly to her in Navajo.
Ruth buried her face against Bessie and didn’t look at him. Bessie tightened her arms around her, and tears spurted from her eyes. “Please don’t do this,” she begged softly.
Thomas’s eyes met hers. “She is my daughter. I have searched for her for seven months. Would you deny me the right to raise her in the traditions of her people? What can you give her that I cannot? Love? I love her more than you know. Money? I have my own ranch and am not a poor man. I have enough to see to her needs.”
“She loves us,” Bessie whispered. “Can’t you see that? We are her parents now. I don’t mean to hurt you, but she doesn’t know you.”
“She will learn. It will be hard for a few days, but she is just a baby. She will adjust. My mother and sister look forward to teaching her.” There was no compromise in his eyes. She could sense his compassion, but she knew he would not change his mind. He would take Ruth, walk through the front door, and she would never see her again.
“Could I visit her?” She found it almost impossible to speak past the tears in her throat.
He hesitated. “Perhaps someday. But not now. She needs time to accept us and for us to accept her. She will be happy with us. She would never be truly accepted in your world. I think you know this in your heart.”
She tightened her arms around Ruth and backed away a step. She saw tears in Jasper’s eyes as he came toward her and stood beside her.
Thomas held out his arms. “My daughter, please.”
Bessie searched his eyes and then looked at Jasper. The pain she saw reflected there almost broke her composure totally. She buried her nose in Ruth’s neck and inhaled her baby scent for the last time.
Jasper bent his head and kissed Ruth’s cheek. “Take her quickly,” he muttered brokenly.
Bessie thrust the baby into her father’s arms, and then she turned and ran from the room.
fourteen
The bright sun shone most of the time in Arizona Territory, but Jasper knew that Bessie never saw it for days. A dark cloud of despair seemed to have wrapped itself around her heart and colored everything she said and did. Jasper was helpless to penetrate her depression. He missed her gentle smiles and thoughtful gestures. He didn’t recognize this hollow-eyed stranger who never laughed.
He was dealing with his own grief, too. The house echoed with memories of Ruthie, her laughter, her smiling eyes, and childish voice. How would they ever find their way out of this maze of despair? Perhaps if he were a real husband to her and there was the possibility of a child, Bessie could throw off this depression. But now was not the time to discuss that subject.
He stopped Eve on her way to his house nearly two weeks after Ruth was returned to her father. “What am I to do about Bessie?” he asked her. “Does she talk to you at all?”
Eve’s eyes were filled with grief. “She does not speak. It is as if the laughing part has died.”
Jasper raked a hand through his hair. “The evenings are like sitting alone. She stares into space and only answers my questions when she has no choice.?
??
Eve nodded. “Could she go home for a visit? Perhaps it would help her to see her own people.”
His heart sank. He hated to think about being without her. But he didn’t have his Bessie now. The woman sharing his home was not the Bessie he had come to admire and love. And he did love her. He knew that now when she had left him in spirit. Several times he had tried to tell her, but the words stuck in his throat.
He thanked Eve, and with lagging steps he went to check on a ticket. This was the only thing he could think to do. Once he checked the stage schedule and the cost of a ticket, he headed back across the parade ground to tell Bessie.
§
Bessie didn’t bother to give Eve any instructions. Her friend knew the house as well as she did. Besides, none of it seemed very important. Their quarters could have been covered in dust and cobwebs, and she wouldn’t have noticed. What reason did she have to keep it clean? No precious baby would crawl across its floors; no pudgy fingers would reach to put stray dirt into her mouth.
She thought of Boston. The emerald lawns and trees, the parties and laughter. What would Jasper say if she told him she wanted to go home? She longed for green grass, for parties to take her mind off her loss. She wanted to share with her family what a lovely child Ruthie was. Surely they would understand her loss if she told them in person, wouldn’t they? She wanted to get away from this house filled with memories of her smiling baby.
If Lenore were no longer seeing Richard, perhaps Bessie should step aside and let Jasper have the woman he really wanted. Although it would mean her own ruin, Bessie would have some satisfaction in seeing another’s happiness. What did it matter if her reputation was in tatters now? Her daughter was gone. She stared at the bright spot of sunshine on the kitchen floor. Why did the sun continue to rise each day when in her heart she felt only darkness?
She knew Jasper was concerned for her. He stared at her when he thought she wasn’t looking. First he was saddled with a wife he didn’t know, then he was left with this shell. And that’s how she felt. A shell. All the joy and happiness had fled from her spirit. Jasper deserved better. She thought she still loved him, but any emotion was hidden deep inside. It hurt too much to care. If she went away, he would soon forget her.