“No, you’re wrong. You have to be wrong, Ever.”
We both sat there staring at our plates, watching the steam slowly dissipate as the butter melted into the food. Everly didn’t have to ask. She waved the server over. “Can we get these plates to go?”
We placed our untouched food into containers and walked outside. The thunderstorm had left behind air that was so clear it almost hurt to take a deep breath. We walked silently to the car. Everly stopped to put the key in the car door. Her eyes rounded as she looked past me.
“Hey, Woodstock.”
The knot in my stomach tightened more as if someone was wringing out my insides. I turned around. Jem was walking toward me with that pale brown gaze that reached right into my chest. Everly’s words were playing through my head, picking at my brain. I’d thrown my trust and my affection, heck even my love to this man without thought. He’d swept me right off my feet, and I’d let him. Even with Everly’s persistent warnings. But he’d saved Finn and he’d saved me. I was nearly shaking with confusion by the time he reached me.
He sensed something was wrong instantly. The crooked smile on his mouth straightened. “What’s up, Tash. I was about to pick you up. It’s a nice day for a ride on the bike.”
“Yeah, I’m feeling kind of hungover from last night. Couldn’t even eat my breakfast.” I held up the box as proof. “I think I’m just going to head back to bed.”
He looked over the top of the car at Everly. Then he took hold of my arm and pulled me a few feet away from the car so she couldn’t hear. I couldn’t lift my face to his, so he pushed up my chin with his fingers. “Want to tell me what’s going on?”
“It’s nothing. I’ve just got a lot on my mind.” Tears threatened again, but this was no time to cry.
“What about tomorrow morning for work?”
I looked away. “I’ve got a lot to do in the office. I think I’ll take the bus and get there early.”
He stood there staring down at me, but I couldn’t look at him. My heart was splintering in every direction.
“Right.” He looked over my head. “Hey, Everly, fuck you and your fucking lies. You think you know me, but you don’t.”
“I know you’re just like your dad,” Everly shot back.
“Yeah, and you’re just like your uncle. Guess we both didn’t fall far from the tree.”
He brushed my hand with his fingers. “Don’t do this, Tash. I need you. I fucking need you, and I’ve never needed anyone in my whole fucked up life.”
The tears flowed freely now. “I just need some time to think.” I turned and stumbled to the car. He stood and watched as we pulled out of the parking lot.
Chapter 24
Jem
I’d ridden the bike fast and hard, with no destination in mind. I just needed to get out of Blackthorn. It hadn’t done much to clear my head. I doubted anything would. It shocked the hell out of me—my reaction to Tashlyn’s coldness in the diner parking lot. I knew she’d taken hold of my heart, I just hadn’t realized how badly until she couldn’t even look at me. The fucked up thing was I had no idea what I’d done. All I could think was that Everly had finally convinced her not to trust me.
The bike rolled along Phantom Curve as I headed back into town. As my dad got closer to meeting his maker, he was letting more secrets slip. Our last conversation had solidified in my mind what I’d always known. My dad was somebody else’s grunt. He was doing the dirty work for someone else. In my mind, I’d always imagined some high caliber urban dwelling mob type calling the shots over the phone. But more and more, it seemed I’d been ignoring the obvious, that someone right here in Blackthorn Ridge was in charge. His comment that I should leave it alone or be killed seemed to prove that theory. But who the hell could it be? Everyone in town had always been scared shitless of my dad.
I turned off onto Main and rolled through town. Sundays were always quiet, and aside from the diner, the only place open was Gregor’s Market. I wasn’t sure if Tashlyn would ever speak to me again, and I needed more than ever to talk to her. Especially now. There was so much to tell her. But first, I needed to find out who was behind all of this. And I knew where to start.
I pulled the bike up in front of my Great Aunt Alice’s shop. The store was closed, but she’d be inside, organizing her collection. Alice was one of those people who fit the idyllic, storybook setting of Blackthorn Ridge. There were a few people in town worthy of this beautiful place. I knocked on the door and peered down into the window on it. I knocked again, a little louder. Dane and I had no other relatives in town. We hardly ever visited Aunt Alice, which was shitty of us. Alice had tried for awhile, when we were young, to keep an eye on us and let our dad know when she thought he was doing something wrong or that we were getting out of control. But Dad had too big of an ego to listen.
The louder knock had urged Alice out from the backroom. She had on her wire rimmed glasses and her tight school teacher bun, which always reminded me of Mrs. Claus. She peered for a long moment through the window and looked slightly alarmed.
“Aunt Alice, it’s Jem.”
It took her a second to recognize the name. She smiled and pulled her keys from her apron pocket. She opened the door, and I stepped inside.
Alice looked up at me. “Jem, look at you. Did you get taller?” She laughed. “Or am I shrinking?”
I hugged her. “I think it’s just been awhile since you’ve seen me. I’m sorry I don’t come around much. How are you doing, Aunt Alice?”
“Oh you know, the arthritis is acting up, but I don’t like to complain.” She took hold of my hand and gazed up at me. “Tell me, Jem. How is your dad doing? The last time he was in here, he looked dreadful. And, do you know he walked out with one of my newspapers. Haven’t gotten it back yet.”
The missing newspaper, it gave Tashlyn good reason not to trust me. I shook my head. “Dad’s not good. He’s weak and he’s lost a lot of weight.”
She sighed sadly. “Such a shame. Such a lost life, that man. He could have done so much.”
I’d heard my great aunt lament about my dad’s failed life many times, and it always surprised me. I’d never seen even a glimpse of a man who looked as if he was destined for greatness.
“Would you like a soda, Jem? They’re cold.”
“That’d be great.”
She leaned into her small fridge and pulled out a coke. Her eyes rounded with surprise as she turned back. “I forget how big you are. You almost fill this room.” She took off her glasses and looked at me. “You always were such a picture. When you were born, I swear the nurses in the hospital were smitten.” Her gray brows squeezed together. “Don’t understand why you put such big holes in your ears and those big metal discs, don’t they hurt?”
“They did when I got them, but I don’t really notice them anymore.”
Her brows were still knitted together when she stepped toward me and lifted her slightly gnarled finger to my neck. “What’s that mark? Is that a tattoo?”
“Yeah, I’ve had it for awhile.” I popped open the can and drank. My throat was parched from the long ride to nowhere. “Aunt Alice, I wanted to ask you something about the past, if you don’t mind?”
She held out her hands. “Ask away. No one knows more about this town than me. I’m surrounded by history.” She sat on her couch. I pulled up the footstool and sat across from her. I took another sip. As much as Alice loved to talk about the past, I knew there were stories she preferred not to retell.
“I wanted to know more about what happened the day that dad’s girlfriend, Elizabeth, died.”
She considered my request as she picked up her glasses and wiped them clean on her apron. “Oh, that was a tragedy. She was such a lovely girl, and your dad, well, he was crazy about her. They were only teenagers, but it seemed definite that they would end up togethe
r after high school. She would have been the making of him. Instead, her death turned out to be the ruin of him. He never recuperated.”
“Didn’t help that the entire town had branded him a murderer.”
She reached across and patted the side of my face. “You have your dad’s eyes, you know? But that’s where the similarity ends. Yes, the town was unfair to your dad, but he used it as an excuse to do whatever he liked. He could have changed their opinion of him. Instead, he chose to maintain his reputation as a troublemaker.” She stood up. “Follow me and you can find anything you need to know about Elizabeth’s death.”
I got up and we walked down the narrow hallway leading to her massive newspaper collection.
I hadn’t been down the hallway in a long time, and I realized I had to lower my head to avoid the overhead lights. “Do you remember the date?”
“Well, I’ve tried not to think about that terrible day much, but I know your dad and Elizabeth were seventeen. It was the summer before their senior year.” She opened the door to the backroom. The smell of old newspaper almost overpowered the ever-present smell of coconut oil, my great aunt’s elixir of life. “Elizabeth was at the head of the class and so pretty,” Alice continued as she walked to a shelf at the far end of the room. “She rode the Independence Day parade float just before her death. I think July 6th, 1982 is the date we’re looking for.” She lifted her glasses and pushed her face closer to the boxes. Her eyes followed the boxes up. “At the top, naturally. Grab the ladder, Jem. Of course you could almost stand on your tip toes and reach it. So tall. That’s nice to be so tall.”
I picked up the stepladder and positioned it beneath the stack. I climbed up and grabbed the top box. A cloud of dust followed it off the shelf.
“See, too high up for me to clean. Bring the box to the table, Jem.”
I carried it to the table.
“Of course, if your dad hadn’t run off after Elizabeth got hurt, people wouldn’t have been so quick to blame him. He was scared. But anyone who saw his face at Elizabeth’s funeral could tell that he loved her.”
I pulled off the lid. “He ran? He never mentioned that.”
“Not his proudest moment, I’m sure.” She fished into the box and pulled out a paper. “Front page, of course.” She handed it to me. “I’ll let you read it.” She placed her hand on my arm. “Jem, your dad did one thing right and that was he raised you two boys. Don’t sell yourself short. Or your brother. I know Dane has a little harder time of it, but you both turned out all right and that was your dad’s doing. Just make sure you take a different path than him, and you’ll do fine. And follow your heart. It always knows best.”
I leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Thanks, Aunt Alice. Words to live by.” She walked out, taking her tropical sweet fragrance with her. I sat on the couch and stared down at the yellowed paper. Elizabeth Nelson’s picture was on the front page. I’d seen her picture a few times. She was definitely pretty, the kind of girl you’d want to hang out with on a lazy summer afternoon. The article was relatively short, but one detail surprised the hell out of me. My dad never talked about that day, but he’d never mentioned that Rebecca Gregor, Landon’s sister and Everly’s mom, was with Elizabeth the day she died. Rebecca had run for help, it said, when Elizabeth had fallen and hit her head. She had been playing on the rocks near the river with her close friend, Alcott Wolfe, when she slipped and knocked herself out. According to Rebecca, Alcott got scared and ran off. By the time Rebecca had returned with help, Elizabeth had disappeared. Her body was found half a mile downstream. The coroner claimed that drowning was the cause of death and not the contusion on her head. Police theorized that she’d gotten up and, disoriented from the bump on her head, she’d fallen into the river.
I sat back and stared down at her photo. The police theory seemed sort of a stretch. No wonder the town had decided that Dad had had something to do with her death. He was a fucking coward for running off. I read the article once more. Something seemed to be missing from the story. It was no wonder my dad had always avoided the subject. He’d run off and left the girl he’d supposedly loved to die.
It seemed strange that this was the first time I’d heard of Rebecca Gregor’s involvement, especially since she was a witness. I placed the paper back in the right place and put the box back up on top. I stepped off the ladder and walked out of the room, wondering how the hell I was ever going to live on the outside of my dad’s shadow.
Chapter 25
Tashlyn
I looked out across the sawmill yard to the river. Everyone was clocking out, but Jem remained out there, near the water, looking lonely and broken. Or maybe I was just hoping his feelings matched my own. I’d tromped around the office all day feeling dreary as if someone had tied weights to my feet.
I blamed myself. I’d let Everly’s inherent mistrust of the Wolfe’s infect my opinion of Jem. He’d done nothing to deserve it. The opposite, in fact. Many times during the work day, I’d let my gaze drift out the window to watch him work. Everything about him was heartbreak to me. He’d come to my rescue more than once, and all the while, he was stealing my heart. I’d cried myself to sleep the night before and chided myself for so easily dismissing him at the diner. Even Everly seemed to regret the whole thing.
Hal pulled his keys out and put on his hat. “Don’t forget to turn out the lights, Tash. Looks like everyone’s clocked out except Jem. He’ll probably be up shortly.” He lowered his voice as if we weren’t the only two people in the office. “To tell you the truth, I think he sticks around just to make sure you’re all right. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Have a good night, Hal.”
I walked over to the window. Jem was pulling some branches off the river. The final sunlight of the day glanced off the water’s surface, temporarily illuminating his face. It was a face I already knew in my dreams.
I didn’t dare let myself think that he’d come early and stayed late today to make sure I was safe. After my cold dismissal of him, I didn’t deserve it. Either way, I felt much safer knowing Jem was only a few hundred yards away.
I returned to my desk. I had about fifteen minutes of filing and a good hour before the bus. I spent a few minutes organizing the papers, wondering how I’d gotten anything at all done today. I pulled a few drawers out and reached toward the desk for the folders. I knocked them off, and the papers I’d just organized flew to the ground.
With an irritated huff, I got down behind the desk to collect the papers. As I straightened, I caught sight of the tall figure walking toward the office. Jem’s fists were at his sides, and there was a storm of emotion in his light brown eyes as he lumbered across the yard.
I stood up and walked in front of the desk. It wasn’t fear or mistrust I was feeling as I watched him stomp toward the office.
A cold rush of air swirled around the room as he yanked the door open and stepped inside. He stopped in the center of the floor and stared at me, his chest moving steadily with deep breaths.
His throat moved with a swallow before he spoke. “Every spot of dirt in this town has my footprint on it. There are two sides to this town. Half is redeemable, people like my great aunt, who are just trying to live their lives. The other side is closer to hell than anyone wants to admit and that half has slid so far into the darkness, there’s no way to pull out. I’m on that side, but I’m still holding onto the edge. Plenty of demons pulling on my ankles and making it hard to hang on but I’m trying. I’m fucking trying. I lay awake at night worried I can’t keep you safe and knowing I can’t lose you or I will fall right into that fucking hole. You’re the first light I’ve seen in a long time—”
I ran to him and threw my arms around his neck before he could finish. I pressed my mouth against his. “I’m so sorry,” I said between kisses. “I was scared and confused and—” His mouth devoured mine.
He took hold of my face and pressed his forehead against mine. “Don’t you ever leave me, baby. Never.”
I shook my head hard. “Never.” I kissed him again. “It’s been a long day, Jem. Take me home.”
Chapter 26
Jem
Tashlyn stretched and a soft sound came from her lips. She was sleeping soundly, but that didn’t stop me from wrapping my arms around her. And it definitely didn’t stop me from wanting her . . . again.
My hands trailed across her breasts as I pulled her back against me. She moaned in protest but pushed her naked ass against my raging erection and wiggled it. I’d spent an entire day thinking she was never going to talk to me again, that I was never going to have her in my arms again. It had been a long fucking day, and it had stunned the hell out of me. I’d never needed anyone until now, until Tashlyn.
I reached down between her legs to coax the cream from her pussy but as my fingers pushed between the folds, they slid into hot moisture. “Baby,” I whispered, “have you been thinking of me in your sleep?”
She giggled. “Could be.” A sigh followed as I stroked her clit.
She pushed her bottom against me and my cock nudged her. “I want to feel all of you,” I groaned. “No barrier. Please, Tash. I’m always good about the condom, but with you, it’s different. I don’t want anything between us. I want to feel every hot inch of you.” As I spoke, I coaxed her closer to coming with just my fingers on her clit.
She answered by jutting her ass out even farther. She reached up and clutched the pillow as I pushed inside of her.
“Your pussy feels so fucking good. I knew it would be perfect . . . like you.” I moved with long, slow thrusts into her, penetrating as deep as I could go. The hand between her legs filled with slick moisture as it dripped from her pussy. She squeezed her thighs around my hand and braced herself against me as I jammed my cock inside her.