“I’m good, Mom. Really.”
“There isn’t anything you want to talk about?”
I shook my head. “No. Really. I’m fine. I promise.”
She gave me a hug. “All right, but I’m here. Any time. You hear me?”
I nodded. “Yeah, I do. Thanks.” Then I guided her to my door, watched her walk downstairs—and quietly locked my door behind her. A few deep breaths later, I put on my cutest pajamas and unlocked my second-floor terrace door and waited for Wes.
Normalcy was all I kept saying to myself, but the truth was, it didn’t feel normal at all. I wanted him with me like I had wanted my childhood blankey. I felt alone without him. I briefly wondered if I was being unreasonable, but then decided I wasn’t. I almost died—almost didn’t have a chance to feel him near me again. Now that we were given more time, that is exactly what I wanted. I needed it like…what was it he said? Air.
Air, which was getting thinner and thinner as the minutes passed until his arrival. It was past twelve by the time he climbed the deck steps and showed up.
“What took you so long?” I whispered sternly.
He bent over to give me a kiss and then murmured. “I was giving your mom a chance to settle in with her cappuccino.”
I laughed and pulled him down onto my bed, pressing every single inch of me against his cool, perfectly sculpted physique. I even pressed my toes against his shins. I made sure every part of me was soaking up his presence then buried my face in his sweet, fresh scent, and closed my eyes. The air that filled my lungs took the place of the soft blanket on my bed. It wrapped itself around my nerves and bones, keeping warm a heart that was beating for an undetermined amount of time. I pressed myself even closer to shake the thoughts of how many beats remained.
“I love you,” I whispered into his chest.
He kissed my cheek, whispered it back to me, and began stroking my hair. And I knew that, for the moment, my normalcy was back.
Chapter 3
WORK
Mr. Healey told me I could have as much time off as needed from the bookstore, but I wanted to work. It brought things back to normal faster, and I couldn’t imagine Ms. Mary working every afternoon in my place. She was on the verge of retirement and the few afternoons she worked opposite me were more than enough for her.
Going back was good for me, and so was inhaling the musty vanilla scent that I used to shower off as soon as I got home. Now, since nearly losing all the senses I had, I grew to appreciate everything, including the scent of Healey’s Used Books. I breathed it in, just happy to be back.
But the actual working part ended up being quite a challenge. I couldn’t ring people up with a cast on my hand and my fingers still sore. Even if I could fumble my way through the register, bagging was impossible. I ended up shelving most of the time and even that took me twice as long, but Mr. Healey was nice about it. I guess some help at the store was better than no help at all, and I was more than willing to do it. So much that I shelved each book with a small smile.
As usual, Dawn Healey arrived at work after me and she sprinted to where I was. “You’re nuts,” she announced.
I laughed. “What?”
“You’re nuts. How am I ever supposed to get my dad off my back about my laziness when you’re practically working in your hospital gown?”
I chuckled. “I’m not in a gown.”
“Might as well be. But, seriously, you don’t have to be here yet. The store could certainly manage without you for a while.”
“Yeah, I’ve been told that a thousand times. I want to work. It makes me feel normal again.”
She pressed her mouth together and drew it up on one side. “Fine, but if I almost died and my boyfriend rescued me on a white horse, we’d be riding off into the sunset right about now, saying good-bye to this place. That’s for sure.” She turned around to go put her stuff in the back. After a few perky strides, she turned. “I’m glad you’re here, though.”
Glad I was here? Me too, and that’s an understatement. As I shelved some more books, I started wondering. Riding off with Wes wasn’t such a bad idea. In fact, I could see visions of it dancing around in my head. I even paused for a minute to give the images the attention they deserved, but my thoughts were interrupted before I could get too carried away.
“Hey, you.”
I smiled a large grin. “Danny.”
“Sophie. You’re a soldier.” He came up and gave me a strong one-arm hug. “You actually came.”
“What? You didn’t think I would? You guys act like you haven’t seen me. You did come every day I was in the hospital. I told you I was fine.”
“Yeah, but you were doped up.” He laughed. “Dawn bet me whether or not you’d come to work today.”
“And?”
“And,” he said, heading back toward the front, “I won twenty bucks.”
At least someone around here knew me. I wasn’t a quitter, that’s for sure, and Danny knew me well enough to pick up on that. He had come to be like the big brother I never had. I really liked him, and Dawn too. They were great friends, but Dawn was like the younger sister. One that needed to be kept out of trouble. Even still, she was my closest friend here.
My other best friend was in Virginia. Kerry and I were still really close, but I hadn’t seen her since I visited last summer, so it was nice to have Dawn and Danny. And the two of them usually made working a riot, especially when their dad wasn’t around.
I was supposed to work until 8:00, and for dinner we usually ordered in or picked something up. This time we didn’t have to. Wes dropped off Thai food for all of us. Large containers of just about every sampling on the menu.
“You’re so stupid,” Dawn said as we carried it to the table in the back room.
“What are you talking about?”
“I would’ve been long gone with that guy. He can bring me Thai on a tropical island, not at Healey’s Used Books.”
“Dawn, stop it. You’re out of control. Besides, he hasn’t asked me to go with him to some tropical island.”
We had the food containers spread out now, and she busily plopped a large portion of rice noodles on her plate. “That’s too bad. I’ll have to have a talk with him.”
We both laughed and filled our plates with a little bit of everything. After a few minutes, Mr. Healey came into the back room and quietly took me up on my offer, fixed himself a sampling, and moseyed toward the door.
I called after him, in between bites, “Mr. Healey, tell Danny to come back and get some.”
“Danny left for the night.”
“What?” Dawn asked. “He’s not supposed to leave until 9:00.”
“He had some studying to do.”
Dawn and I both laughed, although my laughter was a bit more restrained than hers.
She practically spit out her food and would’ve had she not had a napkin to cover her mouth.
Rolling her eyes, she replied, “Yeah, right, Dad.”
Mr. Healey wasn’t smiling. “Dawn,” he said, authoritatively pointing his plastic fork at her, “maybe you ought to try studying sometime.”
Pointing her finger into the air as if a light bulb had just blinked on, she answered, “You know, Dad, I will. I have a test tomorrow, so I’m not staying until 9:00 to cover for him.”
He shook his head and, choosing not to continue with the way the conversation was headed, reminded us to clean up after ourselves and left the room with his food. Dawn was making it overtly obvious that she really didn’t want to work at Healey’s anymore. I wondered what was up, but figured I’d leave it alone for now.
“Why did Danny just leave without saying anything? And since when does he pass up food?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know what Danny is up to these days, but it ain’t studying, that’s for sure.”
“So what do you know?”
She shook off the question. “He’s just been hanging out with some weirdos. Ever since we went to that party, he’s had some losers over at the house
all the time. Like they have nothing better to do than hang out in our basement. They’re fronting like they’re starting a band, but whenever Mom and Dad are home, they all leave. Dad actually buys into the studying bit.”
“Maybe he is. Studying, I mean.”
“No, Danny has always gotten good grades, even if he sleeps in class. It’s sickening. He doesn’t need to study, and I’m sure he wouldn’t start now.”
“Hmm. Well, maybe he’s helping out his new buddies.”
She laughed again. “Yeah, maybe…if they were in school at all. He’s the only one still taking classes.” She shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. Danny can do no wrong in Dad’s eyes.” Some newfound resentment was in Dawn’s tone.
I figured she’d spill when she was ready and moved to a lighter subject. “Well, what am I supposed to do with all this food?”
“Take it home, or better yet, leave it here. We’ll eat it again tomorrow!”
I took a bite of some chef’s rice and agreed. She stabbed a shrimp and popped it into her mouth, seemingly unfazed by her spontaneous display of tension.
We put the leftovers in the fridge and both of us worked until 8:00. Mr. Healey ended up closing by himself since Dawn wasn’t about to cover for Danny, and I simply didn’t want to stay. Working my normal shift was one thing, but staying late was another.
I had things to do and they began when Wes picked me up as part of the agreement. My mom was not ready to let me drive with my broken hand and she was still worried about my safety. And, since I refused to let her drive me, she was happy to let Wes help. He pulled up right as I walked out, and I hopped into his car too fast for him to get out and open the door for me.
“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were happy to leave that place.”
I leaned over and gave him a kiss. “No, just happy to see you.” I buckled my seat belt and turned my body toward him. “Drive me somewhere, anywhere,” I ordered.
“Your mom is expecting…”
“So what?” I countered.
He just looked at me, his stare as still as a statue’s. I tried to return one of equal intimidation, but it didn’t work. He wasn’t budging.
I rolled my eyes. “Fine, I’ll call her.” I dialed her number and the second ring was cut short as she eagerly answered the phone. I let her know we were grabbing dessert somewhere and then I put the ball in his court. “Now take me somewhere.” I smirked.
The statue came to life as his lips parted, at first with a smile and then with the words I was waiting to hear. “Where do you want to go?”
“Anywhere. I don’t care. I just don’t want you to take me home yet.”
Smoothly putting the car in motion, he confidently said, “I have an idea.” He shifted through the gears with ease and directed the car away from my house. I smiled in reaction, but of course, curiosity got the best of me.
“Where are we going?” I asked, feeling myself swell on the inside with hope of it being someplace alone.
Without taking his eyes off the road, he answered, “To get dessert. That’s what you told your mom, right?”
I frowned. “Are you always such a goody two shoes?”
He laughed. “Aren’t you?”
“Only because you make me that way.”
After a few moments, he interrupted my silent sulk. “So how was it being back at work?”
“Weird,” I answered, looking out the window.
“Weird how?”
I looked over at him and he was still watching the road, unaware of my silent wish to head off to that island Dawn had been talking about. I guess it was unreasonable, but being close to him made my desire for it all the more real. I snapped out of my secret dream.
“Well, Dawn is acting like she wants to run away, and Danny left early to study.” I laughed at the last part. Saying it out loud made me hear how untrue it sounded.
Wes smiled in response. “Where does Dawn want to run off to?”
I rolled my eyes. “I have no idea. She just kept saying I was stupid for not riding off with you on your white horse into the sunset.” He studied me briefly for my reaction to the idea. I looked out the window again. “Then she said she’d rather be on an island somewhere instead of at Healey’s. She couldn’t understand why I was still hanging around.”
“And what did you say?” His voice was softer, as if he realized he’d missed something in my mood.
“I told her you hadn’t invited me to any island.” Then I thought I’d lighten the mood. “And that you are keeping me prisoner in my mom’s house forever and that Healey’s is my parole.” He didn’t laugh, so I nudged his thigh. “I’m just joking.”
Giving me a smile that I was sure was forced, he pulled into the parking lot of a run-down pizza parlor.
“Pizza?” I asked.
“Stay right here. They have dessert. I’ll bring it out to you.” He kissed me on my cheek and got out, locking the doors behind him, and ultimately reminding me of my vulnerability. I shuddered and then ran down a list of Italian desserts in my head and came up empty on anything I would be in the mood for. But, as usual, he knew exactly what would make me more than happy.
Tapping on my window, he motioned for me to get out of the car. We sat on an iron bench facing a dark, wooded area, and had I not been with him, I might have been a little nervous. But I was with him, and I felt safe. And once he slid his purchase out of the bag, I felt elated.
“Funnel cake?” I smiled.
“For you,” he said. “But you have to let me feed it to you this time, with your hurt hand and all.”
“Yeah, right. You just don’t want to wear it.”
“Not true. You can do it if you want.”
“No,” I interjected. “I want you to.”
I ate almost all of it before I felt like I was going to explode. He finished what I didn’t eat and then he started talking.
“We used to eat here all the time, you know.”
“We did?” I perked up and turned, completely facing him.
“Yes. It was the only place where your dad didn’t know anybody.”
“You mean Lenny’s dad. The evil dad?”
He nodded. “Yeah, that dad.”
Frank was my dad when I was Lenny. I had come to learn that I’d lived at least twice before. Amazing, unbelievable, but true. Not something I would’ve ever known had Weston’s life not been unnaturally altered to near immortality in 1916. But, because it had been, he had known me then and assuredly identifies me now as the same person.
Lenny was born Lenore Lee Emerson in California in 1944. Maria and Frank were my parents. I have no memory whatsoever of that life, other than one dream and details that Wes tells me from our time together. And those all occurred after I met him in 1963.
Up until now, we hadn’t had much time to talk about all the things we’ve really been through. I knew that Lenny’s dad didn’t like Wes because of his absentee parents. Of course Wes had no parents because they had died decades before, but Lenny’s dad just assumed he was a misfit. Lenny had actually gotten into a big fight with her dad on the night she died.
Wes pulled me from my thoughts. “So we used to come here all the time because no one would ever be able to tell your dad you had been here. You used to love the pizza and the funnel cake.” He smiled. “Anyway, it’s family owned, and the owner might remember you, so I didn’t want you to go in.”
“What about you?”
“You know I can get away with resembling my ‘dad,’ but with the two of us together? Well, you know how that panned out last time.”
“Right.”
I didn’t need the recap. I knew that Andy pieced together part of the puzzle when he thought I was just some girl who ‘looked’ like Lenny, until he saw me with Wes, and then he knew it wasn’t a resemblance, or a coincidence. I shuddered a little, and Wes wrapped his arm around me.
“I thought you might like to see the place. Are you ready?”
I wanted to see if I remembere
d anything. I turned around on the bench and stared at the shack. That’s what it was. A pizza shack. Rectangular building with a flat roof. One neon sign that spelled out Spitony’s. I looked up, hoping something would bring my mind to pleasant memories with Wes, and got nothing. Instead, thinking of Lenny having to sneak around to get away from Frank annoyed me. I stood up and nodded and Wes walked me back to the car. I was about to get in when he stopped me.
“Sophie?” He was so close to me, I could’ve kissed him. He started wiping powdered sugar away from the corners of my mouth.
“Yes?” I answered softly.
“I am going to get that white horse and take you to that island.”
I leaned in now, only millimeters from him, and I could feel his breath. “Now?”
He shook his head gently. “No. You’re not ready.”
“Yes, I am. I just want to be with you.”
He kissed me in a tender way that reassured me of his affection, and also in a way that told me he would always be there for me. But it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t binding, like a plane ticket would be if it was purchased for us tomorrow.
I broke away. “We’re not going any time soon, are we? I have to keep waiting for you to pick me up or come over to my mom’s?”
That all sounded too immature and shallow for us. What we had become was so much more than that. A century of belonging to each other was undeniable. Our lives were connected, and even though the purpose of that had yet to be discovered, there was no doubt that I was born to be with him. Our destinies were intertwined, and I wanted to own up to it. Make it ours to mold. I wanted a place where we didn’t have to hide our affection, a place where we could do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted.
He kissed my forehead and drew me to his chest. “We’ll go when the time is right. I promise you.”
I thought about pressing the when and where, but I knew it was better not to. Wrapping my arms around him, I gave in to the idea that Dawn would just have to see me again at Healey’s tomorrow, and I was fine with that, for now. I knew deep down that he was right. I was overreacting in my desire to be with him, and only him, right now. My mom would freak and that wasn’t fair to her, but it didn’t change the way I felt.