"So, I am a freak?" I asked in a strangled voice.
"Freak?" Haniel asked, rolling the foreign word off his tongue.
"Like a leper," I said, trying to paint a picture he could understand.
"A leper?" He asked in an alarmed voice. "No, Krista, you are not a freak or a leper. As I have stated before, you are a gift. As an Ascended, you are only one Heavenly Realm below an Archangel, which is why your powers are similar to mine."
"Well, I don't have the whole mind reading thing," I pointed out.
"That is incorrect. This is merely another gift you have not yet realized."
"You mean she'll be able to read everyone's minds?" Lynn questioned.
"When she chooses to fully accept what she has become, yes."
"That's so frikin' cool, Krista," Lynn said, looking at me like I had sprouted angel wings.
"Yeah, I guess," I said, not entirely sure how I felt about my new status. Reading minds sounded cool, but did I really want to know what everyone was thinking.
"It's totally awesome," Sam said, practically jumping with glee. "Too bad we're still not in school, we could have had some serious fun with that," she continued mischievously.
Her words made us all laugh and soon everyone else was throwing out their own suggestions, each one becoming more and more outrageous. I watched from the corner of my eye as Haniel quietly left the camp. I was tempted to call him back and ask him the one question that still lingered inside me, but I fought the urge, scared of what his answer would be.
Dinner was more quiet and subdued as we ate the most delicious stew I had ever tasted. It had been slow cooking over the fire the entire day. I wolfed down two bowls before my friends' had finished their first. Skipping breakfast and lunch had left me famished and the savory flavor and heartiness of the stew filled my grumbling stomach.
I watched my friends closely while I ate. I could feel their gambit of emotions over what they would be facing the following night. I used my new powers to smother out their erratic feelings and calm the mood. My interference did the trick and all the tension seemed to float away. Lynn smiled at me gratefully, knowing full well I was responsible for lifting the weight off their shoulders. I returned her smile, rising from my spot to rinse out my bowl with the water we had stowed in jugs and stored by the campfire.
Sam and Lynn joined me with a stack of bowls they had collected. We made quick work rinsing them out and drying them off.
"You girls ready?" Robert asked grabbing the clean stack of bowls from Lynn's hands.
"Yep, I'm bushed," Sam said, yawning exaggeratedly.
"Me too! I woke up way too early this morning," I said, stifling my own yawn. It had been decided that our group would sleep first, that way I could be on hand during the middle of the night in case Victor sent in another attack. My accelerated powers gave us a sense of security since they had proven to be highly useful.
I lifted the flap of the tent and crawled in first. After pulling my boots off, I slipped comfortably into my down sleeping bag. I was half asleep before my friends could get in their own sleeping bags. Sam mumbled a good night, but I was already halfway into a dream.
My eyes blinked in the bright light. I could tell I was dreaming from the familiar haze that surrounded me. Everything else about the dream was foreign though as I took in my surroundings. Over the last few months, my dreams had been filled with an oppressive darkness that filled me with dread and threatened to smother me. And before that, my dreams had always taken place at dusk with the soft sand of our beach beneath my toes and the smell of the sea air tantalizing my nose.
This dream was filled with bright sunlight and rough grass that tickled my feet as I walked. Looking down, I saw that I was wearing a long flowing white dress that wrapped around my ankles as the wind blew it back and forth. My hair whipped around my face making it hard to see. I reached back, dragging it over my shoulder and gathered it together in my hand, holding it into place. With my hair no longer a hindrance, I was able to take in my surroundings and realized I was standing atop a cliff that I could have sworn was the same one that held the hotel we had attended for prom. I turned in a slow circle, looking for the hotel, but it was as if it had been plucked off the cliff and placed elsewhere.
As I finished my slow observation around, my heart lurched when I saw a lone figure standing at the edge of the cliff in front of me. The broad shoulders and windswept brown hair was as familiar to me as my own hand. My heart began to beat erratically, leaving my pulse racing when he turned to me and smiled the crooked grin that I loved so much. I knew with every fiber of my being that I was dreaming, but none of that mattered as I raced across the short distance to get to him. He gathered me into his arms, swinging me off my feet. I sighed in pleasure as his scent filled my senses. I buried my head into his neck relishing in the heat of his skin.
"I've missed you," he said, startling me.
"I've missed you too," I said, tilting my head so I could gaze into his eyes. "I've missed the way you feel and smell," I added, burying my head into the crook of his shoulder.
"I've missed the way you feel too, but something seems off. You feel different somehow," he said, sounding puzzled.
"What?" I asked, confusion clouding my voice. "Why?"
"I don't know, it's like there's no connection between us," he said, taking a step back to study me.
I glanced behind him at the churning waves that beat relentlessly against the side of the cliff. His backward motion brought him inches from the cliff's edge.
I opened my mouth to warn him, but before I could get the words out, he took another small step backwards. In slow motion, I watched as he teetered on the edge, his arms flailing around trying to help recover his balance. I raced forward, reaching for his hand, but grasped only air as gravity pulled him backwards away from me. In an instant, he was gone, snatched from me once again. I stood at the edge of the cliff searching frantically for him, but to no avail. Tears burned a path down my cheeks and without hesitating, I stepped off the cliff. My scream tore its way out of me as I plunged toward the threatening rocks and waves below.
My scream filled the small confines of the tent, waking my friends. I placed a hand over my mouth to muffle the sobs that ripped through me. The heartbreak of being separated from Mark, even in a dream state, was devastating.
"Are you okay Sis?" Shawn asked, switching on the flashlight.
I nodded my head, afraid that if I opened my mouth to speak, the screams I was so desperately trying to hold back would rise to the surface.
"You sure?" He asked again, concerned. I nodded again, lying back down as I turned to face the nylon of the tent with tears running hot and fast down my cheeks. Shawn clicked the flashlight back off and the tent was once again immersed in darkness. I could hear the rustling of sleeping bags as the rest of my Band settled back down to get a few more hours of sleep.
Soon, the sound of soft snoring filled the confines of the small dome tent. Eventually, my tears ran out and I could feel them drying on my cheeks. My dream shouldn't have surprised me. I suspected when Haniel had made his announcement earlier that day about my new status of being Ascended, that Mark and I would never be the same. Even if the outcome of the battle my friends faced swung in my favor, my link with Mark was gone. For months, I had been trudging along, waiting for the moment that I could look into his eyes one last time and see if he really was Victor's puppet. All my hopes and dreams had clung to the slim chance that it all could be fixed. My new role now had changed all that. Even if I was able to Guide Mark back to our side, he would no longer belong to me. By surviving our separation, I had ruined any chance of us ever belonging to each other.
Chapter 9
My own chattering teeth woke me up before dawn. I pulled my sleeping bag up to my chin, trying to ward off the chill. Squinting in the dim light I could see Lynn and Sam snuggled tightly in their sleeping bags also, but Shawn and Robert were nowhere around.
I wonder why no one woke me u
p for my watch shift. I thought to myself, curiously. I grabbed my hoodie out from behind my head where I had been using it as a makeshift pillow. The heat from my head had kept it relatively warm and I sighed with pleasure as some of the morning chill dissipated when I slipped it on. I pulled my cheapo mittens out of the front pocket of my hoodie and stuck my icy fingers into them.
My rustling around and chattering teeth woke Sam who was lying closest to me. "You okay?" She asked.
"Yeah, just freezing my butt off," I grumbled. "Where are the guys?"
"I know right. It's flipping freezing. They took watch themselves. Shawn said we looked like we needed a good night's sleep."
"Oh, that was nice of them. I guess you didn't put up much of a fight, huh?" I added teasingly.
She grinned mischievously at me. "Heck no, it's warmer in here."
"I'm surprised they haven't been in here yet to wake us up though," I said.
"Good morning sleepy heads," Shawn piped in through the unzipped flap of the tent.
Sam and I giggled together at his words. If I didn't know him better, I would think I somehow influenced him to pipe in at that moment. But no, that was just my brother being a wise guy.
"Hey, be a good boy and come in here and give me a kiss," Sam teased.
"Good boy? What am I a dog?" He crawled into the tent and kneeled over her, using his tongue to lick her face.
"Eww gross," She yelped.
"I'm just giving you a taste of what it would be like to kiss a dog," he teased.
The goofy expression on his face made Sam and me laugh as he let his tongue lull off to the side of his mouth like a dog would.
"Sheesh, could you quiet down over there, some of us are still trying to sleep," Lynn mumbled in her usual morning cranky tone of voice.
Sam and I laughed harder as Shawn nodded his head with his tongue still lulling off to the side.
"Ugh," Lynn groaned, throwing her small travel pillow at us.
The pillow bounced harmlessly off Shawn's head, but not one to fall out of character, Shawn retaliated by sending a mock growl her way. He grasped the pillow between his teeth, shaking his head.
Sam shook with laughter as he whipped the pillow back and forth, growling deep in his throat the entire time.
"Okay stop, my side hurts," she managed to spit out between giggles. She reached up to pluck the pillow out of his mouth, but Shawn growled over his prize like a dog would.
Lynn, and I, and now Robert, who poked his head in through the opening of the tent, howled with laughter as Shawn and Sam proceeded to have a tugging match over the pillow.
"Enough," I said holding my own side that ached from my belly laughs. Shawn dropped the pillow and lavished one last slobbery kiss on Sam's upturned face.
"Fine, come on though, everybody's up," he said, sauntering out of the tent.
The four of us looked at each other and busted out laughing again. "Wow, I'm so jealous I'm not multi-talented like Shawn," Robert said helping Lynn to her feet.
"I don't want a dog babe, I prefer the whole angel rock star thing," Lynn said, shooting him a steamy look.
I looked away uncomfortably at the sudden sexual current that had developed between them. Ugh, picking up that vibe with my new powers was definitely something I could live without, I thought to myself as I grabbed my boots and hastily climbed out of the tent, suddenly anxious to be outside.
My dream nagged at me as I pulled on my boots outside of our tent. It was wonderful to see Mark again in my dreams, but to have him once again, snatched away in such an extreme manner, hurt. I would have sunk to my knees in agony if not for the fact that I was surrounded by an audience.
"You okay Krista?" Jenna called out, spotting me by our tent.
I plastered a smile on my face and headed toward where they were gathered.
"Yeah, I was just pulling on my boots," I said shivering as a breeze blew through our campsite. "Holy Moley-Cannolie, it's freezing out here," I griped.
"It's much better by the fire. Come sit over there with us," Jenna said, coming out of her tent with a small throw blanket. "I'll even share my blankie with you."
"Sounds good," I said as another shiver ran through me, making my scalp tingle. "Wow, those look like some serious snow clouds," I added, observing the ominous clouds that seemed to blanket the entire mountaintop.
"Yeah, John thinks we'll definitely see some snow today," Kieran said.
"How is John this morning?" I asked.
"Fit as a fiddle. Not a mark on him, and he said the ache he felt the majority of the day yesterday is completely gone. I can't thank you enough for getting Haniel there so fast Krista," she said earnestly, grasping my hand between both of hers. "I know you're unhappy with the changes you've had to undergo. I also realize what your biggest fear is, but I will always be grateful that you were there when John needed you the most," she added, giving me a quick hard hug.
I nodded my head, not trusting myself to answer as unshed tears clogged my throat. I knew she was right, the changes my life had taken had allowed me to save our lives. I had been so focused on my own selfish pain and what I had lost, that I'd forgotten to look at the bigger picture. For months, my one goal was to get to Mark and find out the truth. Everything hinged on that moment alone. I would either have him with me or I would give up and let myself go. All of that had changed now. How could I deny what I had become and how could I put my own selfishness above my friends? I might never again experience a fraction of the love I had shared with Mark, but I was given a role that I could no longer ignore.
"It's what I'm made to do now," I finally answered Kieran, pulling my mind back to the conversation.
Kieran looked at me closely, obviously trying to gauge how I was feeling, but I deflected her attempt without an effort. I was not ready for anyone to know the rollercoaster ride my emotions were on as I sorted through my new priorities.
"Is Haniel around?" I asked, changing the subject before she could pry any further.
"I haven't seen him this morning. Do you need him for something?"
"Yeah, I have something I need to run by him. I guess I can always page him," I said, shooting her a smile. My mind sent the message before the words could even leave my lips and within seconds, Haniel was striding through the woods toward our campsite.
"Did you require my assistance?" He asked, stopping in front of me.
"I was hoping we could go for a walk and talk," I said, making my point clear. My friends had stopped all their morning rituals at Haniel's appearance and were all studying me intently. It became abundantly clear by their expressions that my nightmare the night before had woken more than just my friends in our tent. By the looks they were shooting my way, it was obvious they were expecting some kind of nervous breakdown from me.
"I'm fine guys," I said, trying to reassure them. "I just need to iron some stuff out with Haniel."
My words seemed to ease their stress a little, but I could still feel their stares boring into my backside as Haniel and I left the campsite behind.
Instead of walking up toward the stream like the previous day, Haniel and I walked down the mountain until we hit another small clearing not too far from camp. The clearing was empty except for a lone boulder that was roughly the size of one of the cute Mini Cooper cars I loved. The boulder was smack-dab in the middle of the clearing and was covered with a soft blanket of moss that begged you to sit down. I scrambled up the side of the boulder and perched myself on the flattest spot I could find. The height of the boulder allowed me to make eye contact with Haniel from where I sat, which I felt was crucial for what I had to say.
Haniel's face was a blank slate and he watched me without saying a word. His blue eyes turned guarded as I finally turned to him.
"Sooooo," I said, dragging out the word. "I guess you could say things are starting to look a little clearer for me today. For months now, in the back of my mind, I've held on to the fantasy that Mark allowed his father to alter his feelings to protect
me. I thought all he would need to do is see me again and I would be able to help him find his way back, but I've come to realize that even if that proved to be true, our relationship will never be the same again." I said in a rush, trying to get all the words out before he could interject. "Because, I'm no longer a Guide, right?" I asked.
Haniel nodded his head, letting me continue.
"And Mark is no longer my Protector, right?"
"That is correct."
"If Mark can be saved, will his soul link with another Guide?" I asked, ignoring the phantom hand that seemed to grip my heart.
"Your link was severed when Mark left with his father, eliminating what you were both created for in that instant. Mark is no longer a Protector; therefore, his soul will not link with any other Guide."
"If I have become some mystical Ascended being, what has Mark become?" I asked, finally getting to the root of my questions.
"That is yet to be determined. The Dark One has cloaked Victor and Mark well, leaving us unable to know their futures."
"So, if Mark can be saved, he will be something else like me?" I probed.
"Yes."
"And that something could be very bad if we are unable to save him, right?"
"That is correct."
"So, in order to help the outcome tonight, I have to come with you." Haniel tried to reply, but I held up my hand. "Wait, let me finish. I understand why you and The Light may have felt cautious before. You were concerned that my feelings could jeopardize the lives of all the Links, I get that. But Haniel, this has become more important than just Mark and me. If Victor really has become what you say he is, I can't let my friends risk their lives in that kind of danger without me. I could never live with that, and you can't expect me to. If I have become an Ascended, they need me there," I said, finally laying all my cards out on the table.
Haniel studied me appraisingly for a moment before answering. "You may accompany us," he said decidedly.
I thought I misunderstood him at first, ready to pitch a fit if need be. His sudden consent threw me off, I had an entire second part to my speech all prepared about "how I could help save the lives of the Links while he dealt with Victor." I never expected him to cave so easily.