He loves me and he’s not prepared to share me? His last statement sounds like a command I need to action. I’m astounded by his articulate, almost rehearsed response and his words resonate with me in an unexpected way. Before I can respond, he takes my hands.
‘Let me ask you this. Did you want to be with me this weekend? Had you considered it before you arrived at the hotel on Friday afternoon?’ My glance shifts nervously towards my trembling hands before I eventually meet his eyes. He need only search my eyes for a flicker of a second to confirm the answer to his question. ‘Right. Same for me. Do you have any regrets?’
‘That is a very big question, Jeremy.’
‘Oh come on, sweetheart. You have come so far this week, don’t go all shy on me now.’ He pushes for an answer, pinning my arms beneath me so he has free access to keep teasing my nipples, which instantly swell and harden under his touch, and then proceeds to massage my breasts when I continue to procrastinate.
‘Perhaps I should have worn a bra tonight.’
‘Perhaps you shouldn’t be wearing anything tonight.’
My dress is suddenly sliding onto the floor beside us.
‘Now stop changing the topic and answer the question.’
‘Okay, okay, no, no regrets. It is very difficult to regret anything when you are under the masterful spell of Dr Quinn …’ Near impossible would be more accurate as my body begins to writhe under his touch.
‘Seismic activity, masterful spell … what’s all this about?’ he asks with a cheeky innocence.
The massage continues as his light kisses on my neck become more insistent. My legs spread further under the weight of his and I feel his desire for me against my groin.
‘It’s about my body betraying me at every opportunity when I’m with you, regardless of my thought processes. And it is something I am going to have to get under control very soon, particularly if we are going to be working together.’
‘Please promise me, sweetheart, that it isn’t high on your busy to-do list.’ He nibbles my ear lobe as he scoops me off the lounge and carries me to the circular canopy that is the master suite, throwing me gently into the middle of the giant round bed. ‘Do not move an inch, I’ll be right back.’
I submit to his request as my mind swishes around the edges of a salacious whirlpool. I’m just thankful I’m lying down. He returns with a sneaky grin on his face, no doubt up to more mischief. There’s no time for words as his caresses explore further, deeper. Oh good lord, here we go again!
‘When is enough, enough?’ I sigh.
‘With you, sweetheart, never, but you can always say no to me.’ His low husky words in my ear send me into overdrive, as he is fully aware that for me, it is never an option.
‘What, so you can strap me down and have me whipped until I change my mind?’
‘Hmm, something like that …’ He laughs and turns me over to position my fully naked body on all fours, as he continues to fondle and tease.
‘Try to stay still, I want to try something.’ I can feel him insert something coolish into my vagina, not too big, but not small either, and then the vibrations begin, slow at first but steadily increasing. I can’t focus on anything apart from the spasms cascading through my body. I am wet with desire in seconds. My body instantly responds to the memory of the warmth and vibrations that took place when I was strapped in place on the platform. Such sensations so soon. How is this happening?
Jeremy reaches down, slides his thumb into my anus and I tense my muscles waiting for the tightness to reject him. To my surprise, his entry feels anticipated and delightful. Oh good grief, what has he done to me to achieve this? He gently wiggles his thumb around and finds a particular pressure point and massages gently at first, then more persistently, pushing the sensation toward the buzzing in my vagina. I gasp as my mind begins to spin and my body convulses with the memory of previous euphoric waves. He is more than pleased with the result, registering the surprise on my face with a crooked smile.
‘Is it comfortable?’
‘Yes,’ is all I can sigh as the rhythms pulse through my body and his fingers continue to explore and create new sensations. I feel a rush of heat rampage through my vagina and arsehole, as he slowly withdraws his thumb and grabs a condom packet, ripping it open. He positions himself behind me ensuring the condom is secured over his length. I can’t help but send a questioning look over my shoulder, though his beauty is rather distracting.
‘Relax, sweetheart, I promise, I’ll take it slow.’
His lubricated penis penetrates the tip of my arsehole, teasing the entry before carefully, gradually moving forward, allowing me to adjust to his thick presence in such a confined space, every step of the way. Each time he penetrates a little further and deeper, asserting his position over me without losing the intensity he is creating. Seamlessly, this continues until he fills me as if his member was made to measure and I groan in exhilaration. It has never felt so good back there. His possession of me is perfect, all encompassing and totally complete. His other hand playfully massages my clitoris, becoming firmer, more insistent and I begin to lose any sense of focus.
He flattens my chest toward the bed, causing friction between my nipples and the crispness of the sheet. His elevated body gives him complete control of the desire he is stirring within me, cleverly replicating the position of my previous experience, without the constraints. His fingers carefully tease me to the edge of orgasm, but refuse to thrust further and ignite what is ready to explode. Oh god! My anus is stuffed to the brim as his member shoots electric pulses through my body and to my astonishment, I feel my hole open wider to take him deeper and deeper into my nether regions. I yell, not from the pain of it, but from the depth of my love for this man and the sheer, exquisite pleasure he can incite from deep within my core. I am literally drenched in desire as his fingers complete their final play and I can’t hold back my voice as I am thrust over the edges of mind and body. My screaming continues unabated and I climax over and over, wave after wave, from both my physical reality and my neurological memories. Completely out of control, only animal instinct powering my guttural cries. He adjusts slightly and it happens all over again. And again. I moan and groan with each equally penetrating wave as once again I lose all sense of self. Spinning and toppling into a world I hadn’t known existed before this weekend, I ascend to my newly discovered unconscious orgasmic universe, absolutely saturated in sex. I would do anything, go anywhere, for this man and the things he can do with my body.
What has happened to me? Am I a sex maniac, an addict? I can’t even think of the correct term. I have never in my life imagined so much sexual pleasure. How is it even possible? Of course, like most people, I have read about some people’s ability to have multiple orgasms, but this, what I have experienced, is out of this world. The intensity is so overpowering I remain lost in sensation for quite some time.
‘Is this normal, natural? It is so sudden, so full on …’ I ask as my consciousness returns and I reacquaint myself with my surroundings. I find Jeremy’s face equally as amazed and fascinated as I feel. He gently removes the vibrator and carefully seals it in a plastic bag. ‘More tests?’
‘More results, more discoveries, greater good, you know …’
‘From mind-blowingly awesome sex, who would have thought?’
‘Even I never believed it would be like this.’
‘Well, I’m very happy to partake in these experiments, Dr Quinn.’
‘Right back at you, sweetheart!’
We don’t say much else for a while, lost in our own little worlds and too satiated, just comfortable with each other’s bodies, touching, caressing, arousing. Words aren’t necessary as we happily prolong our experience and the infectious waves of pleasure and aftershocks.
‘While I have you here, it’s time for more ointment.’
‘You have to be joking? You did it not long ago,’ I complain.
‘And how effective do you think that will be after our recent
activity?’ he questions, raising his eyebrows.
I just shake my head.
‘I promised to look after you, and you know how dedicated I am to my work!’
He holds my buttocks in position while tenderly applying the ointment. As I look back up at him over my shoulder, he gives me a cheeky wink and blows me a kiss.
True to his word, Jeremy spends the rest of the week looking after me. He feeds me, bathes me, monitors me, medicates me, stimulates me physically, stimulates me intellectually, exhausts me emotionally, ensures I sleep, brushes my hair, massages my body, heals my wounds and my bruises. I don’t make a single decision or liaise with the outside world. It is as if there is no world outside Avalon. I am securely wrapped in the carefully constructed cocoon of Dr Quinn. I have never felt like this in my life. So utterly cared for, so utterly fragile, almost as if I had always needed him to take care of me. How had I ever survived without him?
We continue to talk, laugh, play and reminisce; it’s as if we are on our own little version of a honeymoon. It’s pure bliss. Except that I miss Jordan and Elizabeth and it’s so hard knowing I can’t contact them in their wilderness. It has never been this long, but even if I were at home they wouldn’t be back yet, so that eases my mind. I push the discussion I know I need to have with Robert on my return to the far outskirts of my mind. Presumably, the world is operating as it always has outside of this place and I, removed from all other reality, exist solely within the isolation of this luxurious treehouse and Jeremy’s love and attention.
‘Come here and let me check your blood pressure. You appear to have more energy than before.’
‘Not again! You’ve monitored me so much I could well be the most examined case study in history.’ He ignores my exaggerated statement.
‘If it has returned to normal, we’ll go to the beach. Actually, it is really good. No wonder you have more energy. Why don’t you get yourself ready and I’ll pack a picnic lunch? There is a box in the walk-in robe with everything you need.’
I stand staring at him dubiously, firstly wondering if he is serious and secondly, what he is up to this time.
‘Go and get ready before I change my mind.’ His words trigger me into action.
I breathe a sigh of relief to find normal clothes in the box, thankful that I am no longer required to play ‘dress ups’. I put on a swimming costume under a sundress, just in case the water is warm enough for a quick dip. I grab sunglasses, hat and sunscreen and feel more energised and fabulous than I can remember. Jeremy has a backpack ready to go and we finally embark out the giant double doors of the treehouse. A driveway heads up behind the house towards the ridge of the mountain. I notice a large man standing outside a checkpoint-type hut. He is in uniform and has a rifle slung over his shoulder. Jeremy acknowledges his wave as I am swiftly guided in the opposite direction, down toward the beach. Shivers scale down my spine as an eerie feeling flows through me.
‘I thought we were completely alone. Is that necessary?’
‘I’ll explain everything when we get to the beach.’
For the first time in days, I notice a perilous undertone in Jeremy’s words, but I don’t want to think about it.
We settle ourselves down on the blanket with a beautifully laid out picnic feast before our eyes. The expansive view is as endless as it is breathtaking with the sky crystal clear. ‘Wow, this place is incredible. I hope we’re in no rush to leave.’
‘We have plenty of time. It’s great to be outdoors with you again.’
‘It’s even better being able to see the outdoors this time.’
He affectionately smooths some loose strands of my hair away from my face and tucks them behind my ear.
‘How are you, really?’ he asks gently.
‘I feel so much better now, thank you. How could I not? I have had your undivided physical, emotional, mental and medical attention. What about you? You look like you have much on your mind.’
‘I do. There’s quite a bit I need to explain to you and I couldn’t risk it up there.’
His hand motions behind us.
‘How come?’
‘Truthfully? I’m not sure whether it’s bugged or not. I know we will be safer out here.’
‘Bugged? By whom? What’s this about, Jeremy?’ I look at him nervously. ‘Or do I not want to know?’
‘I would love not to involve you in any more of this, Alex, but you need to know some of it, as you are right in the middle of it now.’
I have a foreboding that the cocoon Jeremy has so meticulously orchestrated during our time together is slowly but surely about to unravel. He holds my hand and caresses my fingers, as if lost in thought for a while.
‘I think you had better tell me what you need to, Dr Quinn.’ He nods and begins.
‘I don’t need to enlighten you on the statistics for depression; the market for an effective drug is massive and is only looking to grow over the next decade, particularly in western economies. Antidepressants are a billion dollar industry and every large pharmaceutical company around the world is currently undergoing a frantic search for more effective medications, researching many different avenues and spreading their seed funding nets far and wide. This has become even more urgent given the recent studies conducted by the FDA, which concluded that some antidepressant drugs can be linked to an increase in suicidal tendencies compared to a placebo. All hell has broken loose for companies to develop a new drug. Competition is fierce and desperate and although I hate to admit it, not always above the line. Which is why we need to have this conversation.’
He sounds a little on edge, which is unusual for him and it’s why he has my undivided attention.
‘Someone hacked into Sam’s computer in the last twenty-four hours and will have access to the results I sent him. This is the reason for the added security. We haven’t been able to determine who it was and it may take some time. I don’t mean to scare you more than necessary, Alexa, but if our competitors stumble upon the potential of the formula we’re developing as a result of last weekend, and your involvement in it, well, let’s just say it may put you in undue danger. And that is a risk I’m not willing to take. I have organised a qualified bodyguard who will pose as your full-time research assistant at UTAS to ensure your security at work when you return.’
‘You’re serious?’
‘I put you into this situation and I’ll take full responsibility for ensuring your safety. I don’t know what I would do if anything were to happen to you.’
‘What could happen, Jeremy? What are you so worried about?’
‘All pharmaceuticals are concerned with protecting their existing and potential patents and the major companies spare no expense in doing so. They have special departments for their investigative work and they aren’t staffed by the average person, if you know what I mean. They recruit ex-SEALs, computer hackers, scientists and neurosurgeons, and ex-judges who are or were at the top of their field. Some of the most highly trained and skilled people on the planet are retained on exorbitant sums of money to fulfil certain requirements of the firms they work for.’
‘And are you one of those people?’
‘No, not necessarily. I have a specific arrangement with a pharmaceutical company in relation to the development of a drug for depression. These special departments are all about ensuring the intellectual property of the company is protected at all stages of development — and at all costs. In essence, they protect the security of our research results. As we get closer to developing a formula or product and embark on the process of preparing for a legal patent, which can be a long-winded process, they become more engaged. Intellectual espionage is rife in the pharmaceutical industry and for some organisations the human cost of achieving patent rights is of no consequence. It’s part of the way they conduct business. My concern is that if one of our competitors is involved in the hacking, which hasn’t been confirmed at this stage, they may well want to verify our results for themselves.’
‘You me
an with me?’ To say that I’m shell-shocked would be an understatement.
‘It’s unlikely, but not totally out of the question. I don’t want to alarm you, Alex, and I won’t let anything happen to you, but you must accept the extra security that will be coming your way. I won’t be taking no for an answer.’
‘Do you honestly think something could happen?’
‘We hope not, but we will certainly be taking extra precautions, just in case. In the meantime, I’d like to give you something, Alexandra, both as a memory of our time together and in the hope that it will help to keep you safe.’ His expression is serious. He pulls a small box from his backpack, opens it carefully, and places a solid silver or platinum bracelet into my hand. I study it closely. It appears to be encrusted with what looks like pink diamond chips and illustrated with ancient Gaelic inscriptions, their intricate and delicate design a stark contrast to the bracelet’s robust weight.
‘Jeremy —’ I start.
‘Alexandra, since you’re not in a position for me to be putting a ring on your finger just yet, I’m hoping that you can promise me you will wear this and not remove it.’ He looks deeply into my eyes. ‘Will you do it for me?’