In the state I’m in now, I won’t be able to hide the rawness of the pain I’m feeling. He’ll see it the moment he lays eyes on me. That kind of hurt? It’s something that needs to be tended to free of prying eyes and ears until it’s manageable enough to address without becoming a pitiful pile of mush.
But he’ll be upset if he finds out that I’ve had the results this long without telling him. The only thing I can do is send him a message. It’ll bide me some time before I have to face him.
Results are in: negative. Congrats! No diaper duty in your near future.
I play it off as a joke, as if I’m not completely devastated by the news. Secretly, I’m hoping that if I do it long enough, I’ll begin to believe it myself and this horrible feeling will go away.
Guess that means more time on the field. You up for practice tonight? My desk is available. :wink: My hopes are on the window. Imagine all those people seeing those beautiful tits pressed against the glass while I fuck you from behind.
Jesus. Did someone crank up the heat in here? Despite my dour mood, a furious flush spreads across my chest, neck, and face, but even that can’t erase what’s in my head right now. My mood is grim as I message him back.
As fun as that sounds, rain check. You wiped me out last night. Drinks and food at your place tonight?
Instead of another message, my phone rings in my hand, startling me.
“I’m working late tonight,” Rebel’s voice rumbles in my ear. “Why don’t you come up and keep me company. I’ll order up something for dinner and have you for dessert.”
Balling up the damp paper towel, I pitch it in the trash. “That sounds nice, but not tonight.”
“What’s wrong?” Rebel’s tone shifts, and I picture him sitting at attention, his mouth forming a grim line as he prepares to wage war against whoever or whatever has wronged me.
“Nothing.” I sigh, knowing I can’t dodge this forever. “Remember when I asked you last night if you were disappointed?”
There’s a long moment of silence that follows as he puts the pieces together. “Ah, baby. I’m sorry.”
“It’s nothing. I didn’t really think I wanted it to be true until it was no longer an option. I guess that saying is true: be careful what you wish for.”
“Fuck,” he curses under his breath. His voice stronger now, Rebel tells me, “I’m coming down.”
“No, Rebel, don’t. I’m okay. Really. Just a little taken off-guard is all. It’s nothing I won’t get over with the help of a little ice cream and sleep.”
“I don’t like knowing you’re upset and I’m not there. I’m coming down, Josephine. Don’t argue with me.”
I have to smile because he knows me so well. With a silent nod, I end the call and head back to my office to collect my belongings. I won’t be getting any more work done today. I might as well let Rebel dictate where the rest of it is headed.
***
Rebel took one look at me and whisked me away from the office. We’ve been gone all afternoon and while I have zero plans to return, I know he has a lot of work still left to do.
“You don’t have to babysit me,” I inform him as I twist the plastic spoon around in the cup of melting ice cream Rebel purchased at a small cart located near the entrance of the park. “I know you have more important things to do.” He did say he had to work late tonight, after all. I scoop a chunk of brownie and vanilla up and extend it out, and Rebel leans in to accept the offer.
Sitting back, he spans his long arms across the back of the wooden park bench and takes his time savoring the sweet treat before answering. “Given the choice between being here and being shut away surrounded by papers and endless phone calls, there’s no contest. I’d rather be here with you.”
My. Heart. Melts. It never fails to steal my breath away when Rebel brings out his softer side. “I appreciate that you want to be with me, because I’d much rather spend my day with you, but you’re a very important business owner now.”
“True,” he says with a devious smirk. “But work is work, and it will still be there waiting for me tomorrow. You need me now.”
“I’m okay.” And truthfully, I am. Just taking time away from everything has helped with setting aside all the torturous thoughts and feelings and getting back to reality. I’ll be a mother someday. Just not today. Now I just have to get over the shock that I actually have a biological clock!
“Have you heard any more from the lawyers? Does it look like Florence is going to keep pushing for this lawsuit?” I ask him, hoping to turn the subject away from me.
“I got a phone call this morning. She’s dropping the suit,” he confirms.
My eyes widen. “Really? That was fast. What changed her mind?”
“The note this morning,” Rebel says with a curl of his lip.
“So that was her.” I freaking knew it!
“Yes. It was her final mistake. In allowing herself to get too emotional, she stepped over the line, and now we have hard evidence that could sink her financially and evaporate her reputation in a blink. She put me in an even bigger seat of power than she realized. She knows it, and now she’s got no choice but to tuck her tail between her legs.”
“Wow, that’s hard to imagine. She’s really done now though? No more shenanigans, no more lawsuits?”
“I never say never, but it appears that way.”
I’m shocked. After the photos, her behavior toward Rebel, and the way Rebel spoke about her, I really expected her to remain an ongoing problem. “At least she’s not after you anymore.”
Rebel just looks at me, the silence spanning a few heartbeats. Long enough to make me question myself. “Right?”
“I’m hopeful, but like I told you before, I don’t take chances,” he says, his tone low and threatening. “If she so much as comes near you, I’ll know about it and she’ll be sorry.”
I shiver involuntarily, once again thankful that I’m not on the receiving end of his wrath.
Reaching over, Rebel tilts the cup I’m holding toward him. “Looks like we’re finished here. Come on,” he says, holding his hand out to me. “I have something I want to show you.”
“Where are we going?” I ask as I drop the cup into a nearby wastebasket as we head out of the park.
He gives my hand a light squeeze. “My place.”
Twenty-Seven
His place is not his place. At least, not the one I’m thinking of. My jaw drops as Rebel holds the door open to a space that is easily four times larger than his apartment downtown. Polished wood floors create a seamless transition throughout the open concept living room, dining room, and kitchen and carry beyond the two-story windows onto a balcony that’s large enough to host a party.
“Rebel, is this...yours?” I ask, astonished as I step further into the space. It smells like lemons—clean, fresh, and new.
Closing the door, Rebel studies me as he stands back and allows me time to absorb my surroundings. “That apartment I told you about? This is it.”
“This is not an apartment,” I argue, my gaze darting around to all the expensive fixtures, detailed moldings, high-end appliances, and granite countertops. “This is a penthouse that rich people buy. Movie stars live in places like this.”
Rebel’s smile is indulgent. “I could have been a movie star if I’d wanted to.”
I slant him a wry look. “Well, you certainly have the face for it. So when are you moving in?” I ask as I skirt the perimeter of the room, checking out each space and imagining what the furniture set-up will be like.
“The movers will have everything in place by Friday.”
“So soon?” That only leaves him a few days. It’s a good thing everything he owns is already nearly packed.
“It’s for the best.”
I assume he’s talking about Florence. At least, that’s who I would be concerned about if I were in his shoes. He’s made a powerful enemy with that woman. Not only has he stolen her dream out from under her, but he’s also taken himself
off the table. Being under the same roof as a woman who’s just as likely to boil your rabbit as she is to suck you off is certainly cause for alarm. Even though she’s off somewhere licking her wounds, Rebel’s insistence on keeping a close watch on her has left me unsettled enough to not disregard the potential threat she poses. I wonder if we’ll always be looking over our shoulder when it comes to her.
“I agree.” Standing in front of the wall of windows, I look down at the unobstructed view of the city. It’s dizzying but equally stunning. The streets are clogged with motorists and pedestrians, but there’s an energy about it all that’s thrilling. I love city life. I don’t know that I’ll ever be the woman who longs for white picket fences to go with her two-point-five children.
I feel Rebel’s presence at my back long before he reaches me, reminding me of the connection we share. It’s not every day you come across the person you can imagine spending your days and nights with, especially when that connection began as lust cloaked in secrecy.
When his arms circle my waist, my eyes drift closed, and I allow myself a rare moment to just be present, to feel the warmth and love surrounding me.
Sometimes in life, a person has to remind themselves to take stock of what’s in front of them and appreciate it for what it is.
Rebel’s lips trace the shell of my ear, his breath light and smelling of mint and nothing else. “Do you like it here?”
“What’s not to like? It’s huge, open, and it has a great view.”
“Thank you, but I was talking about the apartment.”
“So was I,” I chuckle, elbowing him lightly in the side. A plane soaring over the skyscrapers in the distance distracts me and I sober. “It’s great. I’m sure you’ll be happy here once you’re all moved in.”
“We’ll be happy you mean.”
Turning my head, I tilt my face up so I can see his. “What do you mean?”
Running his hand up from my stomach, between my breasts, to my face, he cradles me in the palm of his hand while giving me the most heart-clenchingly tender look I’ve ever witnessed on a man before. “When there was still a possibility that you were pregnant, I considered all the options, and this is the one I kept coming back to. It’s the only one that made any kind of sense. My woman and my baby under the same roof.”
“But there’s no baby.”
Warmth reflects in his eyes as his thumb traces the edge of my jaw. “Not yet, but someday. Just because it’s not happening now...that doesn’t change anything for me. It just made me open my eyes wider to what’s happening right in front of me.”
“And what’s that?” I ask breathlessly.
“You, pussycat. You’ve changed everything. You’ve changed me, and no matter how hard I’ve tried to fight it, I’ve finally accepted that there’s no going back to how things used to be. I love you and I want to be with you.”
“Forever?”
“That’s the plan. I want to take care of you, provide for you, and protect you like you deserve. If you’ll have me. But before you say yes, you should know that I’m a difficult man to live with.” His smile is slow and self-deprecating, and it only makes me love him more than I already do.
Turning in his arms, I tie my hands behind his neck and stare into his dark, midnight eyes. “I know who you are, Rebel Scott, and I’m not afraid. You were right when you said I’ve belonged to you since Day One, but what you didn’t know was that you belonged to me, too. It’s just taken me a while to accept it.”
“So what are you saying here?” he inquires, a hopeful glint in his eyes.
“Yes, I’ll have you.” It’s not a marriage proposal. It’s not a promise of forever. It’s a promise of right now. Right now, we are vowing to give this twisted, dysfunctional, frustratingly perfect thing of ours the best go of it that we can and see how far it takes us. We don’t need a piece of paper for that. All we need is the willingness to try and the love that we share for one another.
Grasping the back of my neck, Rebel hauls my face up to his, forcing me onto my tiptoes to meet him halfway and crushes his lips down on mine. His kiss is brutal, just like the man behind it. His tongue doesn’t so much coax my mouth open as it shoves its way inside, demanding entry and total obedience as he licks the roof of my mouth and delivers stinging nips from his teeth to both of my lips.
We’re both breathing heavily when he ends the kiss. “Come on. Let me show you the first piece of furniture I’ve selected.” Taking my hand, Rebel leads me down a short side wing located just off the living area. Excitement and anticipation thrums in my veins as we approach a closed door, and Rebel shoots me a sly look as he pushes it open.
The moment I see it, a wave of fire shoots through my veins and laughter erupts from my chest. “You didn’t.”
Standing back, Rebel waves me inside. “You might not perform on a stage anymore, but that doesn’t mean you have to stop dancing.”
The room is large by anyone’s standards. Painted a rich shade of blue that’s bordering on the right side of being black, it’s the only room in the place that houses any kind of furniture. And that one piece is all that’s really needed here.
In the center of the room is a chair—a low-back cigar chair upholstered in ebony leather with brushed bronze tacks all along the outer edges of the arms and back. It’s positioned directly in front of a brand new, gleaming silver pole that’s been mounted to the ceiling and floor.
Approaching it, a familiar thrill settles low in my belly. I reach out, running a finger over the cool, hard metal. “You have a real eye for decorating, Mr. Scott,” I purr. “What do you call it...Feng Shui?”
Crossing the room in slow, unhurried strides, Rebel seats himself in the single leather chair, draping his arms over the sides. His large frame dwarfs the piece, making him look like a giant. He’s even more imposing now than he ever was at the club, nothing but a dark figure waiting in the shadows for me to come out and play.
“I call it seduction,” he drawls, his voice dark and husky. He makes a twirling motion with his finger. “Dance for me, pussycat.”
Grinning widely at the very idea of performing for him, I strip off my clothes until I’m standing in only my bra and panties. My stomach clenches and my chest tightens as I reach up and wrap my hand around the poll. Rebel’s pupils dilate as he watches me take an experimental spin. I haven’t danced in weeks, but already it feels like I’m revisiting a different world.
A mix of emotions fills me as I pull myself up and lock my feet at the ankles. I remind myself that it’s just like riding a bike. The fear will pass. As I let go of the pole and arch back, leaving only my legs to hold me, I release all the pent-up stress and anxiety I’ve faced recently and focus all of my energy into this single moment in time. Rebel is all that matters right now. He’s my audience. My mystery man. My admirer. My lover. Once upon a time, I fell for him because of the danger he represented. Now I fall for him in spite of it.
I don’t know where this life will lead us, but I know one thing for certain: where ever we end up, it’s going to be one hell of a journey getting there.
Epilogue
Five years later...
After my parents passed away, I never imagined I would find myself surrounded by family again. I never pictured myself in a committed relationship with a man that I adore more than life itself, either.
Knowing how we started out, I imagine most people would agree that Rebel and I aren’t a good match.
They’d be wrong.
As unlikely a couple as we make, we somehow manage to work. We complement each other. In the last five years, Rebel has grown into an even more amazing man than I already knew him to be. He’s softer now, more trusting. He’s still jealous and possessive and temperamental but, most importantly, he’s good to me. He’s supportive and provides for me in all the ways he promised and then some.
In the time that’s passed, I think we’ve grown as people as well as a couple. We’ve figured out that delicate balance that most couples
attempt to find but fail at, and we’re happy—a feat that eluded both of us once upon a time.
“Do you want another lemonade, Josephine?”
Lifting my gaze, I find Seraphim’s black-as-night eyes smiling softly back at me. “Sure, I could use a refill.” I move to get up, but she waves me back down.
“Nope, you just stay put. Pregnant women should be treated like the queens they are. Rebel! Bring this young lady another lemonade when you get a minute, would you?”
Standing off in a private circle with his father Vincent, Ransom, and Brody, Rebel pauses to look over at us. When his eyes find mine, they’re full of such love and warmth, my chest expands on a deep inhale and my heart skips. Those eyes say everything without the need for words.
A slow smile forms, causing my cheeks to ache, and as he leaves the group and heads toward the table, I can’t bring myself to look away. He’s perfect...and he’s all mine.
After he refills my glass and his mother’s, Rebel crouches down beside my chair and clasps his hand around my knee. “How are you girls doing over here?” he asks. His gaze drops down to where my hand strokes over the back of a toddler who’s been nestled against my chest for the better half of an hour.
“Good,” I say softly, careful not to wake her. At the age of four, Madeline is a holy terror, but considering who her father is, I can’t really say I’m surprised. “I think you boys wore her out.”
“Hell, I think she wore us out,” Rebel chuckles. “Where’d Annie run off to?”
“She’s inside taking a call. Jason again,” I say with a roll of my eyes. The guy ran off to California while Annie was still living with her parents in Virginia. He’s more than moved on with his life, failing to come back even when his daughter was born. But that doesn’t stop him from making the occasional token phone call just to rile things up.