“I don’t know whether to ask you where you’ve been or if you are ill. But I can see and smell that you’ve been drinking,” she said, shaking her head.
“What happened to you?” he asked. Her eye was surrounded by a deep purple bruise.
“Nothing ... I fell.”
“You’re lying to me.”
“What difference does it make?”
“Did one of your johns do this to you? Or worse … was it Bart?”
“Elias, I don’t want to talk about it.”
“But I do,” he said.
“Well, that’s too bad. You walk out of here and do what you please then you come back and start asking questions,” she said, and she got up and slowly went to the kitchen to put on a pot of water for tea. He followed her.
“You can’t dismiss me this easily, Glenda. I want to know what the hell happened here.”
“And I want to know where the hell you’ve been. I’ve been worried about you,” she said.
“You have?” He softened.
“Yes.”
“I was hurt,” he said. “I drank until I couldn’t drink anymore. I don’t want this life for you, Glenda. I want you to leave Bart and all of this behind. I can try to get another job. We could get married.”
She laughed a harsh laugh. “Now wouldn’t that be nice? But, I can’t and you know that.”
“Who did this to you?” Gently he ran his fingers across the tender skin surrounding her eye. “It was Bart, wasn’t it?”
She nodded. “Yeah, it was Bart. He was mad because I was worried about you, and instead of working, I went out to look for you. He had sent a john over here and I wasn’t home. I was out trying to find you. It made him real mad.”
“When?”
“The day you left. I knew you were angry. I wanted to talk to you. I walked the streets all night. Then when I couldn’t find you I gave up and came back here. When Bart came by to pick up his money in the morning, I didn’t have anything to give him. He asked me what happened with the john he sent. I said I wasn’t here and I never saw any customer.”
“So, he hit you?”
“Yes.”
“And then?”
“And then I went back to work. That night he sent some guy, and then he sent another one last night. He said if you came back that he wanted you out of here. So, I guess you’d better go because I am expecting him soon and he won’t be happy to see you.”
“And you, Glenda? What do you want?” Elias asked.
“I told you before, Bart comes first, Elias. I care about you, but I love Bart.”
“So it’s over with us?”
“It has to be,” she said.
“You want me to go?”
She nodded.
Looking at her in disbelief, Elias picked up his suitcase and walked out the door. For several hours, he wandered the streets. He had lost his job, his ego was bruised, and he was heartbroken. The city was being torn to pieces by the bombings. It was then that he made a decision. Britain was at war with Germany. He would enlist, join the army, leave everything behind him, and go to battle against the Nazi bastards who sent him to England in the first place. But first, he decided that he had a mission to complete, a mission that would make the world a better place.
CHAPTER 23
Elias knew where the pub was where Bart conducted his business. Elias waited outside patiently until the bar closed. Bart was one of the last to leave. Elias watched from an alleyway between two buildings as a young girl with wavy red hair handed Bart a wad of bills. He counted the money and then patted her behind and kissed her. The girl went in one direction, and Bart headed the other way. Quietly, staying several paces behind and slipping into doorways, Elias followed Bart. Once they’d left the main street, Elias could see that there was no one around as he gained on Bart. Then from behind, Elias grabbed Bart by the neck in a chokehold and threw him to the ground.
“What the hell?” Bart said. “What’s going on here?” Bart turned just enough to see Elias’s face. “It’s you, you little punk!”
But Elias wasn’t listening or answering. He kicked Bart in the face several times, until the man’s once attractive features were nothing but a bloody mess. Blood poured from his lips and nose, but Elias couldn’t stop kicking him. All of the years of frustration and displacement boiled to the surface in this moment and he took all of it out on Bart. Elias could not hear the man’s cries for pity. All he could see was the trail of johns smirking as they left Glenda’s bedroom. A vision of Mary flitted across his mind, and then another of Glenda. The women he wanted always belonged to other men, men who didn’t appreciate them the way Elias did. When his rage finally subsided, Bart was dead. Elias hadn’t planned to kill him. He was only planning to beat the hell out of him, to show him that he was not just a nobody who could be pushed around. But, it had gotten out of hand and now Elias had committed murder. First Elias wiped the blood from his shoe on Bart’s freshly pressed white shirt. Then Elias ran away. He ran as fast as he could for two blocks. Once he felt as if he couldn’t catch his breath, he ducked into an alleyway and leaned against the building. He was hyperventilating. He’d just killed a man, a devil of a man, but a man nonetheless. Elias was a murderer. The realization was daunting. He sunk to the ground and sat there staring forward into the darkness in disbelief. His head ached, his shoulders were tight, and he felt a sudden wave of nausea come over him. Elias retched and dropped to a sitting position on the ground. Until the sun began to rise, he sat in that alleyway with his head in his hands. Before he enlisted, he had to talk to Glenda, to explain why he did what he did. He knew she would be devastated, and he had to explain that he’d not meant to kill Bart, but he had attacked him out of love for her and then things just got out of hand.
Elias went back to Glenda’s apartment. But he was too late. The police were already there waiting for him. Glenda was crying. She wouldn’t look at him. She just folded her arms around her chest and went into the other room.
Anger bubbled up inside of Elias as he was riding in the back of the police car. He’d rid the world of a cockroach of a man. They shouldn’t be arresting him, they should be praising him.
When they got to the police station, Elias was taken into an interrogation room. Two British police officers sat at the table across from him.
“Elias Green?”
“Yes, that’s me.”
“You killed a man last night?”
Elias shrugged. “What makes you think that?”
“Your girl told us that it was you.”
“What do you mean?” Elias asked in disbelief.
“She knew it was you.”
“Glenda?”
“Yeah, you got another girl?”
“No,” Elias said, shaking his head.
Elias was more hurt by Glenda’s betrayal than he was by the fact that he was in trouble with the law.
“You could face execution for this, you know that?”
“Yeah….” Elias didn’t care. Right now he would have gladly taken his own life to end the terrible pain that was stabbing him in the heart.
“You’re from Germany, aren’t you?”
“You ask a lot of questions.”
“That’s a German accent.”
“I was on the Kindertransport. Yeah, I came from Germany, but I don’t support the Nazi bastards. I hate them worse than you do.”
“Well, we have a proposition for you. You can either face jail or worse, a possible execution,” the cop said.
Elias shrugged.
“But, because your girl tells us you speak fluent German and because you were born there and you sound just like every other Kraut, we’re going to offer you the opportunity to go to Belgium and work as a spy for Britain. What do you think?”
Elias bit his lower lip. “Can I smoke?”
“Yeah, go ahead,” the cop said.
Elias lit a cigarette. He liked the idea. He liked it a lot. “Tell me more. Tell me what you would want me to d
o.”
“It would work like this. You’d have papers that say that you are a citizen of Belgium, German speaking. We’d have a job set up for you tending bar in a nightclub where we know that a lot of German officers meet and have a few drinks. When men are drinking, they like to talk and brag. Your job would be to keep your eyes and ears open and get us plenty of valuable information.”
Elias’s eyes lit up. It would be a real pleasure to be a spy against Germany. He’d like nothing better than to help defeat that son of a bitch Hitler.
“Don’t fool yourself, this is no easy job, and we’d always be watching you. So, you couldn’t pull any shit, like turning on us and joining the Nazis.”
“You wouldn’t have to worry about that,” Elias said.
“I have to say, I believe you,” the cop said. “So, what do you say?”
“I’ll take it,” Elias said. Then he put out the rest of his cigarette in the ashtray on the table.
“Just thought I should let you know before you start. There’s a damn good chance you won’t survive. If they catch you, they’ll kill you.”
Elias leaned back in the chair. He looked the policeman square in the eye. “When do I start?”
CHAPTER 24
1941 June
On June 22, 1941, Adolf Hitler made a catastrophic error for Germany. Believing he was unstoppable, he invaded Russia, going to war against Stalin, an enemy as formidable as himself.
CHAPTER 25
1941 London Late November
Winter was on her way, and the chill that she brought seized the city of London. The building where the Lawrences lived and worked was cold and many times the family wore their coats inside the apartment and the store. Early, before dawn on a frigid winter morning, there was a knock at the front door. Lenore Lawrence grumbled as she pulled back the blankets and forced herself out of bed to see who was there. She put on her heavy wool robe, then her coat and house slippers, and shuffled downstairs. A cold wind rushed in as she opened the door but she hardly noticed. “OY!!!! Thanks be to God. Come in, come in. Hurry up, its cold outside,” Lenore said, pulling her son into her arms. Then she turned and yelled up the stairs, “Everyone come quick, Willie is home….”
The family, including Gilde, came dashing downstairs to the shop. In the excitement, Gilde hadn’t had a chance to get dressed. She still wore the thick flannel nightgown with the heavy wool sweater and cotton socks that she slept in every night.
“Willie, you’re so skinny,” Mrs. Lawrence said, hugging him. “I’m so glad you’re here. Let me make you something to eat.”
“Wil, how did you get home?” Mr. Lawrence asked.
“I’m on leave, Papa.”
“How long can you stay?”
“I have four days, then I am being re-stationed.”
“Re-stationed where?”
“I don’t know yet. I do know that I’ll be aboard a destroyer.”
“Oy, William,” his father said, shaking his head.
“It’s war, Papa.”
The family gathered around William, but Gilde stood back. She hardly knew him. But he looked over their heads and his eyes caught hers as she stood on the bottom stair. Her feet were freezing with only her thin cotton socks.
“Gilde?” he said, smiling. “I remember you.”
“Yes. How are you?”
“Gilde is staying with us. The family she was living with was killed in the bombing,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “She’s staying in your room, so you’ll have to sleep on the sofa.”
“No. No please. I’ll sleep on the sofa. Let William have his room.”
“Don’t be silly. Why don’t you stay in my room with me and that way Wil can have his room back for the time he’s here?” Sharon said.
“Are you sure?” Gilde asked.
“I’d love it. It will be fun, we can practice your English….”
“Your English sounds pretty good to me,” William said. “What happened to your heavy accent?”
“I’m trying to lose my accent.”
“You must be freezing,” William said to Gilde. Then he took off his coat and put it over her shoulders. A glance of approval passed between Mr. and Mrs. Lawrence.
“We raised such a gentleman,” Mrs. Lawrence said.
“Oh, thank you. You didn’t have to do that,” Gilde said, but she was glad for the warmth. And she couldn’t help but think that William looked very handsome in his uniform.
“Let me make you something to eat. You look so hungry.”
“Ma, it’s four thirty in the morning. I’m not hungry.”
“So? So you can’t eat because it’s early in the morning? Why not? You say you’re not hungry. You look hungry to me. Oy vey, you’re so skinny. Well, I’m your mother, mothers can always tell what their children need.”
“You want me to eat? I’ll eat,” William said to his mother, but he winked at Gilde. She smiled back at him and giggled a little.
“I want you should eat,” Mrs. Lawrence said. “It will make me feel good.”
“All right then.”
“Come, I’ll put something together for you.”
CHAPTER 26
For somebody who said he wasn’t hungry, William ate as if he hadn’t eaten in a long time. The whole family sat at the table with him.
“So, how are you?” Sharon asked, “We worry about you every day.”
“I am fine. I am in training.”
“Is it hard?”
“Sometimes, yes. Because I am not a fighter by nature. I spent my childhood dreaming I’d be a doctor. My heart tells me that I am a healer. And I am working on the ship as a medic. The truth is that I can’t even stand to kill an ant, but even so, I have to learn to fight in case I need to. And I have to stand up against the Nazis. It wouldn’t be right for me to stay at home with my family and go to school while Hitler is destroying our country. Besides if we don’t fight the Nazis, they’ll come on our shores and then we’ll have to fight them here. That would put everyone I care about in danger.”
“Not only are they destroying Britain, but they hate the Jews,” Gilde said. “It was bad in Germany for Jews when I left. God only knows how it is now.”
“We don’t know. We don’t hear or see anything. I assume it’s pretty much the same for Jews as it always is. I wish I could promise you that your family is fine. But I can’t. I won’t lie. The Germans are brutal. I haven’t had any personal encounters with them yet, but what the other fellows say is that they are cruel, heartless. I know this upsets you. So, let’s try not to talk about it. There’s nothing we can do right at this very minute. I am doing my part by serving in the navy. I feel it’s the right thing to do.”
“I am just praying that you’ll come home to us safe. Willie, you haven’t seen battle yet. I know you, son, and you’re not made for this,” Sam Lawrence said.
“Yes, but sometimes a fellow has to do what’s right, even if he’s scared beyond measure. It would be easy for me to stay here and be safe and comfortable with my family. But it wouldn’t be right. And, I would always know, that no matter what happened in the end, especially if Germany wins, that I didn’t do my part. I can’t live with that.”
“Don’t let your papa fool you, William. He’s doing his part as well. Aren’t you, Sam?”
“Oh, Lenore. I am not doing nearly as much as William.”
“Yes, but you are making an effort.”
“Your mother is making a lot out of nothing.” Sam shook his head.
“Your father has become a volunteer fire watcher. He watches a factory all night two nights a week. Even at his age he is trying to help.”
“I didn’t know this,” William said. “But I am proud of you, Papa.”
“Everyone has to do their part. I wish I could do more.”
“You’re only human, Papa. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You should be proud. What you are doing can save people’s lives and that’s something important.” William patted his father’s shoulder.
&nbs
p; CHAPTER 27
1941
The following morning William slept late. Gilde and Sharon went to school. But Gilde couldn’t wait to get home and see William again. When she’d first met him she’d thought he was attractive, but because they were in the middle of the bombing she hadn’t really paid much attention to him. But now that he was at home and she was getting to know him better, she was beginning to like his open and honest way of communicating. He had admitted to being afraid. She was impressed that he had been man enough to show both weakness, and courage. The combination won her admiration. She liked him.
William was reading a medical journal when Sharon and Gilde got home from school that afternoon.
“So, how are my two favorite girls?” he asked, smiling and looking directly at Gilde.
“Fine,” they both said at the same time, then looked at each other and giggled a little.
“It’s Friday night, you’ll be here for Shabbat dinner. That will be so nice, Wil,” Sharon said. “Gilde and I baked challah. I hate that brown Hovis bread. It’s so grainy and tasteless.”
“How did you get the flour and sugar?”
“We used our rations, and you know Papa. He always finds a way to get what we need.”
“Black market?” Wil asked.
“Probably. Papa has so many friends and connections.”
“You know how to bake?” Wil asked Gilde.
“Your mother and sister taught me.”
“Well, my mom and sister bake quite delicious bread. So, you’re learning from the best.”
“Since you’re home, I’ll bet Papa tried to get some butter off the black market this morning. We’ve been using margarine, but Papa would want the best for you, Willie.”
“The margarine has a strange aftertaste, but I don’t mind it. We have it in the canteen all the time,” Willie said.
“At first I thought it was terrible, but I’m getting used to it too,” Sharon said.
“I’ve been getting used to a lot of strange food in the navy. I can’t keep kosher. It’s impossible. But, I think God will forgive me,” he said. “However, right about now, real butter sounds like heaven.”