Key stared at his brother and wanted to say a million things, but he was afraid if he opened his mouth, nothing would come out. Nothing could get past the knot in his throat.
“You’re not easy to reach, Key. You’re my brother and I’d do anything for you, but no way I could have told you I know how it is with Eryx. You’d have denied it and kicked my ass.”
“True,” Key managed to say.
“But it’s different now, because so much is at stake. So maybe this is uncomfortable for you to talk about, and maybe it bothers you that we’ve known all along, but you gotta set all that aside if you have a prayer of making it work with Jordan.”
Key looked up at the windows. It was snowing again. “She wasn’t there.”
“No, but you can tell her how it was. You can explain how close you and Eryx were.”
“I did.”
Jax was quiet again, until he said, “It wasn’t in our nature to forgive and accept, but we did, because we love you. If Jordan were to fall in love with you, there’s no way she wouldn’t accept this part of you. She’s Anabo before she’s Mephisto. It’s totally her nature to be forgiving.”
“But there’s a fundamental difference. We were brothers before Eryx jumped. We shared a home, and parents, and our childhood. All we had was one another. Jordan and I have known each other only a few days. There’s no investment, nothing to fall back on.”
“You brought her back to life, and she saved yours. I’d call that a ginormous investment. I’d call that a bond that’ll take a lot more than this thing with Eryx to break.”
For the first time, Key felt hopeful. “It was already hard enough because of what I am, and like you said, I’m not easy. I know that. But this takes the level of difficulty into the stratosphere.”
“Difficult, but not impossible.”
“I don’t know, Jax. She sounded pretty certain.”
“Yeah, and Sasha was actually packing her stuff to take up to the third floor.”
“You never did say what changed her mind.”
“My supreme power of persuasion.”
“No, really. What changed her mind?”
Jax shoved away from the wall. “I groveled.”
“No, you didn’t.”
“Yeah, I did. I’d die for Sasha … in fact, I did die for Sasha, so laying my pride at her feet and telling her I’m sorry for being a jackass isn’t such a big deal.”
“Were you a jackass?”
Jax turned to face him. “I’m a son of Hell. Of course I was a jackass.”
Late in the night, unable to go to sleep, Jordan was lying in bed staring at the ceiling when her phone dinged. Thinking it would be a text from Tessa, she grabbed the phone off of her nightstand and sucked in a breath.
It was from Matthew. I’m glad you’re alive, Jordan. I wish I wasn’t. I’m calling it good between you and me—it’s over. Please don’t call or text or come see me. Just forget me. This is the way I want it, and it’s never going to change.
She texted him back. I never got the chance to say I love you, Matthew, but I do. Please don’t shut me out.
Two seconds later, he replied. I don’t want to hurt you, but I guess I have to. I don’t love you, Jordan. I just said it because I was hoping to get lucky.
He was lying. He had to be. She could remember his face and his eyes so clearly, and the way he said it. Just before Eryx’s minions busted in and shot him. You’re lying.
Not lying. I cheated on you with Tori, because you held out on me so long.
You’re still lying.
Ask her.
Why would she admit it? She’s easy—not stupid.
He didn’t answer for a long time; she was just about to text a line of question marks when her phone dinged.
It was a picture of Tori. Naked. On Matthew’s bed. I’m sorry.
She didn’t text him back.
Rolling into a little ball, she cried herself to sleep.
THIRTEEN
BETSY WOKE HER BEFORE HER ALARM EVEN WENT OFF. “Upsy-daisy, young lady. Your papa wants you in the kitchen for breakfast ASAP so you can meet your new Secret Service detail.” The older woman stood with her arms crossed over her chest and looked down at Jordan with her usual drill-sergeant expression, which made total sense because Betsy used to be a drill sergeant. “They’re both built like tanks, and one of them is named Gunther.”
Jordan sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. “You are so not funny, Betsy.”
“Who’s kidding? The other one’s named Hank. The night-shift guys will be here at seven tonight, so don’t make plans until after that. In fact, maybe you shouldn’t make any plans. You need to stay home with your father until he feels better.”
Alarmed, Jordan asked, “Is he sick?”
Betsy dropped her arms and turned to walk toward the door. “If you’d seen what he went through after you were taken, you’d stay right here in this room until he dies, just to make sure he never has to worry again.” She stopped at the door and said over her shoulder. “Be careful out there, Jo.”
“Aw, Betsy, you really do love me, don’t you?”
“Humph! Hard enough, what with you being such a problem child. Now up and at ’em. Don’t keep the president waiting.”
Jordan slid out of bed and headed for the bathroom, taking off her T-shirt as she went. Flipping the light switch, she blinked and moved closer to the mirror to look at her birthmark. The tiny A had morphed into a bigger A, twined within an M. It was weird and way more conspicuous than the tiny A had been, but beautiful. So this was it. She was now fully Mephisto.
Her first impulse was to call Key to tell him, but then she remembered how it was between them and knew she shouldn’t. That made her feel very alone. And sad.
She got in the shower, and the whole time she was getting ready for school, she thought about him, imagined his destroying the greenhouse; she wondered if he was calmer now. She refused to feel guilty. And she wouldn’t think about the Mephisto Covenant. He would find another Anabo someday, and she could love him and ensure he earned a chance of Heaven.
Her throat made that weird noise again. She tossed the tube of lip gloss back in the drawer and faced the fact that she didn’t want Key to find another Anabo. How could she be this unfair to him? She told him she could never love him, but she didn’t want him to be with anyone else.
Dammit, why did he have to feel this way about Eryx, and worse, why couldn’t she forgive him for it? Lots of people were together who didn’t see eye to eye on certain things. Her own parents had been miles apart on several issues. So why couldn’t she see past this thing with Key and Eryx?
Anticipating seeing him today, even if it was awkward, she grabbed her backpack and headed for the kitchen. Turned out Betsy hadn’t been kidding.
“Jordan,” Dad said from his usual seat at the table, “I’d like you to meet Gunther and Hank.”
Gunther had a shaved head, and Hank had short, curly, dark hair. They stood and offered their hands to shake, and she noticed they were twice the size of hers. They both wore dark suits, and she wondered if they had to get them specially made to fit their huge bodies.
When she was seated, they also sat, and Betsy served Jordan her breakfast. As usual, she gave her a small bowl of granola with half a banana and a teeny glass of orange juice. Yeah, this wasn’t going to work. She’d have to hit the vending machine at school.
“If you need to come home,” Dad said, “do it. I don’t want you feeling miserable.”
“I’ll be fine.”
“I know how you like to dodge your detail, but you won’t do that anymore, will you?”
Glancing at the two giants assigned to protect her, she shook her head. “I may be more afraid of them than the bad guys.”
Hank smiled. Gunther didn’t look up from his eggs. Which looked delicious. “Betsy, can I have some eggs?”
“Why? You never eat eggs. You said the egg people are mean to the chickens.”
It pain
ed her to put her stomach ahead of her principles, but she was starving. The granola and the banana hadn’t made a dent. “I think I need protein.”
“I have some protein powder I can make into a shake.”
That sounded just awful. “How about some eggs, instead?”
“Whatever you want, precious.”
“Can you leave off the side of sarcasm?”
“Killjoy.”
Dad finished his coffee, got to his feet, and came around the table to kiss her cheek. “Have a good day, Jo. Call me later, will you?”
He never asked her to call him. He was seriously worried about her going to school, being out there, exposed. “I will, Dad. Bye.”
When he was gone, Hank asked, “What time does the bell ring?”
“Ten after eight.”
He stood, and Gunther followed suit. “We’ll be down at the side portico.”
As soon as they were gone, she asked Betsy, “Are they going to have breakfast with us every day?”
“No, just today. It was supposed to be a chance for all of you to get to know one another, but between Gunther, who evidently never speaks, and you with your fixation on eggs, you’re all still strangers. Here’re your eggs.”
She tried to eat slowly, then didn’t, while Betsy did dishes and hummed the theme from Hawaii Five-0.
From behind her, a woman said, “Good morning, Jordan.”
She turned quickly and saw Carla standing there in the doorway, her eyes smudged by the shadow of Eryx. She was young, probably in her late twenties, and so pretty, with dark eyes and hair and the most beautiful skin. Jordan had always admired Carla because she was so kind and thoughtful.
But not anymore.
Feeling slightly sick, Jordan turned back to her eggs. “Since when do you not call ahead, or knock? This is our private residence, Carla.”
Betsy turned, eyes wide, probably shocked by her tone. Carla had been a favorite staffer for a long time, so it must have been odd to hear Jordan talk to her that way.
Finished with the eggs, Jordan pushed away from the table and stood. “Thanks, Betsy. I’ll see you around five. It’s Thursday. Student Council day.” She picked up her backpack and turned toward the doorway into the dining room. “Let’s go in the living room, Carla.”
She walked out, and when she was standing next to the mantel, she turned to Carla and waited for her to speak. Dad always said, in a confrontational meeting, let the other guy talk first. See where he was coming from.
Carla didn’t disappoint. “No point beating around the bush, is there?”
“No.”
“I know what you are now, but don’t think you can intimidate me. You probably expect me to quit, but I’m not leaving this job.”
Was she serious with that attitude? “Eventually, you’ll be leaving life.”
“Eryx promised me immortality.” She sounded completely confident.
“Big deal. All that means is that you’ll live forever in Hell on Earth. It must be the worst kind of horror down there, all those rotting bodies, and the immortals who wish they could die but can’t.”
She was gratified when Carla took a step back.
“Eryx will protect me,” she said. “He’ll make sure I don’t end up there.”
“What else did Eryx promise you, Carla? What was worth your soul?”
Carla sort of preened and actually looked down her nose at Jordan. “I’m going to be the chief of staff.”
Her soul for a stupid job. Jordan clenched her fists. “When? Dad just appointed Mike Willis.”
“Mr. Trent told me—”
“What difference does it make what he told you? He’s gone, so he can’t keep any of his promises.” Jordan took a step closer. “If you mention Eryx and your twisted agenda in a reply to even one kid who sends an e-mail to the First Daughter account, I’ll make sure you’re fired. I’d do it now except I have no cause other than that I despise you. That’s not intimidation. That’s a fact.”
“You think you scare me?”
“I don’t give a damn if you’re scared. I won’t tolerate you or Eryx jacking around with any kid who writes to me. I’m pretty sure Mike Willis, your new boss, will feel the same way.”
Carla smiled like she’d just won the lottery. “Why don’t you ask him, Jordan?”
Oh, no. “Is he … did he—”
“Yes, he did. And Robert Threadgill.”
Mr. Threadgill was the press secretary and Carla’s direct boss, reporting to the chief of staff. If all three of them were lost souls, where did that leave her? She had no leverage.
Carla knew it, too. She looked ready to laugh with glee. “I’ll be replying to lots of e-mails today, and every single kid with a problem will get a thoughtful, compassionate response, along with a suggestion to join their local Ravens group. If there isn’t one, I’ll invite them to start one. Do you know about the Ravens, Jordan?”
Jordan remembered Jax telling her that some of the kids at Sasha’s school in San Francisco had pledged to Eryx; they had called themselves the Ravens. Then she moved to Telluride, where there was another group of Ravens.
Feeling all the weight of all those kids who wrote to her looking for help, for answers to their problems, Jordan clenched her fists and took a step closer to Carla. “You will not mention—”
“Yes, I will, and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
Rage slammed into her, turning her vision blood red. All she could see was Carla and her damned shaded eyes. She dropped the backpack and went for her throat, knocked her down, and straddled her, pinning her to the floor while she choked the life out of her.
“Jesus, Joseph, and Mary!” Betsy cried, her hands on Jordan’s arms, trying to pull her away.
If it had been anyone but Betsy, she’d have shoved him back so she could finish off Carla. But somewhere in her wrath-induced mania, she remembered Betsy was older now, with arthritis. And she loved Betsy. She couldn’t hurt her. So she allowed the woman to drag her off of Carla, who was rubbing her throat, coughing, and glaring at Jordan.
“I’m bringing charges,” she said hoarsely, sitting up with a cell phone in her hand.
Betsy said, “You punch one number on that phone, and I’ll be telling President Ellis what you and Mr. Threadgill really do in his office.” Carla lowered her hand and looked surprised. “Yeah, I know what goes on. Now put your phone away, get up, and leave. If you speak a word of this, especially to the president, count on getting fired.”
Carla gathered up her leather portfolio and got to her feet. Jordan could see bruises forming on her neck, which meant Carla didn’t have to tell anyone. They’d know she’d been attacked, and she’d tell them Jordan had done it. There’d be more trouble for Dad, more bad PR, and another giant problem for him to take care of. His daughter getting charged with assault just might be his breaking point.
Now she understood what Key had meant about how hard it would be for her in the real world. He’d said she’d want to kill the lost souls. She wondered if maybe Eryx had told Carla to egg her on, hoping Jordan would lose it and do something that would get her into trouble. Then Eryx would show up and offer to fix it for her if she’d agree to give him what he wanted.
From now on, she was going to have to be way more careful.
“Wait,” she said to Carla before she left the residence. “Sit down on the couch.”
“Why? So you can try again?”
“Just do it. I need to tell you something.”
Undoubtedly full of questions and fear, but always Jordan’s champion, Betsy went to stand between Carla and the door. “Do as she says, Carla.” Betsy looked across at Jordan. “I’m still bigger than you, so don’t get funny.”
Carla went to the sofa and sat down, glaring at Jordan as she came close and wrapped her hands around her neck again. Except this time, Jordan didn’t squeeze. This time, she concentrated on Carla’s creamy skin, on the pulse she could feel beneath her fingers, on smoothing away the bruises. She f
elt warmth travel through her arms, into her hands. It was amazing.
When she let go of Carla, she heard Betsy gasp. “Saints alive, child, how did you do that?”
“She’s sold her soul to Satan,” Carla said.
Betsy opened the door. “Time for you to go.”
Springing to her feet, Carla walked away, shooting a murderous look at Jordan as she went.
When she was gone, Betsy looked at Jordan with tears in her eyes. “I should tell your father, but I can’t stand to break his heart. Swear to me you won’t attack anyone again, and promise me you’ll go to that appointment and work through this.”
“I swear and promise.”
Betsy looked behind her at the door. “I can’t hardly believe she said you sold your soul to the devil. I always thought she was so nice.” She looked again at Jordan and crossed herself. “I’ll be taking you to mass with me Friday afternoon, and no arguing.”
“I’m not Catholic, Betsy.”
“Been taking you to mass since you were a grasshopper, and it hasn’t hurt you any. I want to pray for you, and it’s easier when you’re there. I can show you to God.”
Jordan retrieved her backpack from the floor, then walked over to Betsy and hugged her, accepting her old nanny’s bearlike embrace, which nearly crushed her spine. “I’ll go, Bet. I’ll even be nice to Father Simon.”
“Aw, Jo, I worry so about you. And now this healing thing. How did you do that?”
Still hugging her, Jordan wished with all her heart that Betsy hadn’t seen her do that. For that matter, she wished Betsy hadn’t seen any of it. She hated for her old nanny to think badly of her, and how could she help it? Jordan had almost killed someone, right here in the White House. She sighed. “It’s just something I realized I can do.”
Betsy pulled away, looking confused. “What did you realize you can do?” She looked around and became more confused. “Where’s Carla? Why are we hugging?” Betsy put her hand to her head and shook it. “Glory be, I must be going senile. I came in here because … I was doing dishes, and …”