“But take heed little one, I may like seeing such a fire glow behind those beautiful eyes of yours. However, I will not accept that fire being hissed my way again when I am your King,” he warned and my natural instinct was to argue back but in the end I decided against it, asking him a question instead.
“Then tell me… who are you to me when we are in this room?” I could tell my question had caught him off guard by the look he gave me. It seemed I was quickly making a habit out of surprising him.
“Who am I in this room?” he asked, repeating part of my question and stepping further into me so that he was pressed up against me. I looked up as far as I could, which forced the back of my head to brush up against the pillar. His lips came down to mine and I held my breath in hopes that they would meet my own.
“I am the man who owns you, Little Lamb,” he informed me on a firm whisper and the effect was strong enough to render me under his control if he but asked me to surrender. And this was all down to the feel of his lips that finally met my own in what was our first kiss in this time. The second we came into that delicious contact with each other it was as if all that time between us started to just crumble away into nothing but a cavernous black abyss.
I opened myself freely to him and in doing so he tasted me for the first time making him groan the way I loved. I had never fit this way to any other man before in my life and I didn’t want to with anyone but Draven. But I wanted him to feel the same way and if his reactions were anything to go by, then I would say that it was mission accomplished. He held me locked to him with one arm banded around my torso and I didn’t care about the pain I felt twinge in my ribcage as nothing else mattered but the feel of no barrier between our bodies.
His other hand gripped the back of my hair using it to keep my head back and my position as open to his erotic assault as I had first made it. It felt as though he was not only fanning the flames he spoke of in my belly but he was creating an inferno deeper down that not only touched my soul but also my sexual core. I wanted to give him everything right then and there and by the desperate way his hands held me, I would say that he was as close as it gets to taking it.
He let go of my body and ripped the cloak from my shoulders startling me before pulling me back to him. I let my mind wander for a second into wondering if he growled when undressing the others in his harem but then quickly let that thought fade away before the jealousy became a sticky residue that I couldn’t get rid of.
He was devouring me in his kiss and if I didn’t know better it seemed as though he had never felt this way before or maybe that was just my hope talking. His hands were everywhere and neither one felt like it wanted to stop discovering my body. I moaned in his mouth as his tongue battled with mine in what seemed like a fight for greater passion. The taste of him was sweeter than usual, as if he had not long ago been eating fruit dipped in honey and this,along with his masculine scent of leather and steel, was utterly intoxicating. In fact, I was getting so lost in his touch and the power he had over me that I didn’t realise just how much of himself he too was getting lost in and the power I obviously held over him.
But there was one staggering difference between the way we lost control and only one of us had a Demon that wanted to break free. Of course I was used to Draven’s demon side coming out to play but right now, he just wasn’t used to me being there to play with.
I heard the first rip of material and saw that darkness in his eyes start to glow with purple fire and I knew he was close. I found myself with the unshakable need to push him further until he could no longer hide this side of him from me and I knew just how to do it…
So I pushed.
I moaned even louder and threw my head back, arching my neck and baring it to his Demon in the ultimate sign of submission. His hands pushed up my back either side of my spine so that I arched further against him, pressing myself into him. I wondered if he heard himself growl the way I did or if he just no longer cared. Did he want me to see this side of him?
Well I soon received my answer, even if it wasn’t the one I wanted. I had just barely closed my eyes when I first saw the signs of him losing himself to his other side. He threw his own head back and looking up I saw his fangs emerge ready to plunge them into my offered neck. The primal rumble that then emerged told me he was mere seconds away from taking that last step needed but that’s when something stopped him.
What happened next did so in seconds and in a wild, still lustful heartbeat he gripped my wrists and yanked hard enough to snap the chain between the shackles. By the time I opened my eyes I found my arms had dropped to my sides like heavy weights and I was left panting… alone.
“No.” I whispered to the now empty room. I let my legs slide out beneath me as I slowly slid to the cold hard floor. I pulled my knees up to my chest and lifted my sore chained wrists up so that I could hold myself in this protective ball. Then I let my head rest back against the pillar and let go of all the tears I had stored up.
I felt more lost now than I ever had before and it was all down to a love only one of us felt. Because no matter what we had endured over the years, we had done so knowing one simple truth…our love had carried us through it together. Sure there had been times we had fooled ourselves in thinking otherwise or times we had faced our battles alone but in the end it had been the love we had for each other that allowed us to conquer not only our fears but also our enemies.
Every action taken by both of us had been done out of love. Even now by taking this quest into an unknown past, one where I would never belong, I still held on to the shred of hope that Draven’s everlasting love was strong enough to travel through space and time.
But I was wrong because at the moment of truth…
Draven had left me
Chapter 46
Journey’s End
I don’t know how I did it but I must have passed out from emotional exhaustion. I didn’t remember much after Draven left, not that there was much to remember other than my tears and looking out to the dark city wondering where it all went wrong. I had come so far only to fall at the first hurdle. I felt broken and worst of all, I’d finally allowed all my old fears to come flooding back. I felt like I did that day when seeing Draven on the balcony with Celina, when he pretended she was his fiancé. I knew now that it hadn’t been real but the feelings I felt at the time certainly were and it was the same as I felt now…
I wasn’t good enough.
At least not for the Draven of this time. And why should I be considering the pick of beauties he had lined up and waiting for just a look from their handsome king? I knew that somewhere in the back of my mind there was a part of me trying to break through with some shred of reasoning, but right now I wasn’t letting it in enough to take shape. I didn’t want to give him excuses, I just wanted to sit here and allow myself the time to wallow in self-pity like anyone else would. I was getting so tired of being strong and pushing through the hurt until it looked brighter on the other side. No, I just wanted to live out a few simple moments of my life thinking like most would. Sod being the Chosen One! I just wanted to play the heartbroken girl that felt crushed by rejection.
Was that really so much to ask?
Well I didn’t think so as I spent the rest of the night sitting there crying myself to sleep. Or even when I allowed my dreams to mirror my feelings into the subconscious. Because instead of just allowing him to leave me behind in my dreams, I chased him. I reached out and tried to grab onto the figure of him running away from me. But as it was in life it was in my dreams and he was too fast for me to catch.
I would run until my legs were close to crumbling. Racing first down the corridors of this sandstone palace before it started to merge into a better world I knew. But even being back in Afterlife brought me little comfort as I still chased Draven down the corridors of a place I considered home.
Why was he still running from me?
I felt like I would never reach him and even when I lost sight of him I didn?
??t give up. I spun around and around looking everywhere for just a glimpse of his shadow, casting shapes and pointing me in the right direction to go. I knew I was calling out for him as I could feel my lips moving but yet I heard no sound echoing along the walls. I even asked why he was running from me, hoping that the question would travel these old walls. But there was nothing but silence.
I asked myself what it was that I had done wrong or I would shout out what it was I could do to make it right but again the emptiness around me didn’t answer. So I did the only thing that my heart told me to do and I let it lead me into the Temple.
I was shocked to see what faced me there and even being surrounded by the smoky images of my past was the last thing I expected to see. I watched on in amazement as they acted out as if they were stuck to live out the misery in some morbid play like ghosts that couldn’t cross over. The mystical show started with scenes of my first steps into the sacred tomb. I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the scared little girl who was so naive back then and who looked around in terrified wonder.
Then I watched Lucius battling the skeletons of Supernaturals once laid to rest and my former self building up the strength to help him. I shuddered at seeing Alex again even if it wasn’t in the corporal sense. Just seeing that evil sneer through the floating vapour was enough to have me running away from the nightmares of my past. I didn’t want to see Lucius die for a second time, the first time still haunted me to this day.
And even though I made it without witnessing it, I stepped through just as I heard my past screams of pain behind me. Of course, I didn’t need to look to know what I would find. It made me wonder if ever given the opportunity to go back and warn those we love what would happen? Would it change the past enough to bring peace or would it backfire and only cause more pain? Well running into the next room had me thinking about what I would tell the foolish girl hiding from Draven’s temple guards as she waited for a demon girl to be dragged from her cell.
I thought back to that night and realised now how much I still had to learn. How much pain and heartache I would endure over the coming years and not just by the mistakes I made but also by the mistakes of others. Was that what I was doing now? Was I dreaming of all this as a way for the Fates to try and tell me something. It did often feel like history was repeating itself and chasing Draven as I was now felt like life on replay. So much so I was almost too scared to find out what the Temple itself had in store for me. Thinking back on all that had happened within its elaborate walls was too much for anyone to deal with, let alone for a second time.
So I wasn’t surprised when I walked through years of memories all bombarding me one after another. Life on fast forward and flashing through a smoke screen. A room full of hooded figures all fading into the next like dominos until reaching their master plunging a knife into a wasted vessel.
Lovers experiencing their first dance then replaced by the gruesome truth of Draven’s responsibilities as a misty crowd looked on and cheered. Then happiness too quickly evaporated into a great battle between good and evil fought with equal amounts of love and hate and ending by a brother’s blade forged from dangerous loathing and magic.
But last and most important to date was a wedding of the likes of no other, one consummated under a pair of wings belonging to the two sides of Heaven and Hell. A union of chosen hearts merging as one under Heaven itself to witness. It was painfully beautiful really and it made me grip my heart as if it was being pierced from behind. But as I watched that last image fade another pair of wings took its place, one belonging to the same man, only this time…
He was alone.
It was a haunting sight as the smoke cleared to reveal the broken shell of a man beneath. The figure of Draven on his knees and praying to the very Gods he was at the same time cursing to damnation. His wings outspread and shaking with both anger and utter anguish. I couldn’t stop the silent tears as they fell with each step I took closer and I dug my nails into my palm if only to keep the sobs at bay. I wanted to comfort him. To run to him and tell him all would be okay now, I was here. But for some reason I didn’t…
I couldn’t.
That’s when I finally realised why.
One by one the room started to fill with the last of my memories yet to come and each of them held the same shadowy grief on their faces. The room started to change too and looked just as broken as the people I loved who all looked on at the depressing and final scene that played out in front of them. However, I was the only one to brave stepping closer to see what it was that Draven now held in his arms.
I gasped into my hands as I took that last step as it all started to make sense now. The reasons Draven ran from me were not for the reasons I first thought. The life the Fates wanted to show me as I journeyed to where I knew I must go. For what was waiting for me when I got there was the cold slap of reality I never wanted to see. The horrific truth that faced my future no matter what paths I travelled down.
The destination was always to be the same place…
Dead in Draven’s arms.
Chapter 47
We Will Burn
Hearing Draven cursing my choice to leave him as I lay dead in his arms was by far the worst of my nightmares so far. In that moment I could almost feel my heart shatter within my chest as I tried to grip onto it with both hands. I looked down at myself and saw that it wasn’t just my heart that was fading away into a million pieces but also the rest of my body. It was as though I was made from thousands of pure white skeleton leaves and someone had opened a window. I was slowly blowing away in this painted underground tomb with nothing to hold onto but my broken soul.
And as the last pieces of me floated away the memory of Draven throwing his head back and roaring his fury up at the Heavens would stay with me like a punishment for my unintentional sins. It was the way he held my bloody broken body in a crushing hold to his chest as black tears fell from the eyes of a Demon in utter agony.
“No…no…please…” I pleaded down at him, but it was no use as it was drowned out by his demonic rage. I was floating so far now that it almost felt as though the pieces of me were being carried away by Angels.
“I didn’t want to leave…I never wanted to leave you…” I whispered down at him because I was desperate for him to know this as my last goodbye.
“Neither did I, Nāzanin.” I gasped when I suddenly heard his voice whispered back in my ear as it broke the spell. I tensed my body which was once again whole and when I opened my eyes I was no longer locked in my nightmare…
I was back to being locked in this reality.
“Ssshh now, don’t be scared for I will not harm you,” Draven said looking down at me with concern. Seeing him this way immediately after seeing him in my dreams was like swallowing a bitter pill and having no choice but to force it down just so that I wouldn’t choke. I loved him but he wasn’t the man I fell in love with.
“I…I am not afraid,” I told him after clearing my croaky voice.
“Then why is it you shake like an arrow in the storm?” he asked as he lay me down on his bed made thick from the piles of furs. I looked down at my hands and frowned when seeing them not only still shackled but like he said, shaking like a leaf. I had obviously fallen asleep after he had left me and from how sore my eyes were, I gathered I had done so crying. I decided to answer him with the truth, no matter how childish it made me sound.
“I had a nightmare.” His reaction wasn’t what I expected it to be and when his eyes softened I could relish these few foolish moments to allow myself the time I needed believing I was looking at the Draven I knew…the Draven from my time. It was the same look I always woke up to when he knew I had suffered from what my dreams had put me through.
“Then I am even more sorry that I left you alone,” he told me sweetly after he joined me on the bed and I blushed as he stretched out beside me.
“Why did you?” I braved asking, too curious to let it go. He had his head propped up on his hand and bent elbo
w and I was flat on my back so had no choice but to look up at him. At first I didn’t think he would answer me as he seemed too lost in his thoughts to even hear me. He had started playing with strands of my hair and wrapping them around his thick fingers like he had so many times before back in a bed I called ‘ours’.
“Because I know that I should stay away from you as being with me will only bring you a heartache I will never be free to soothe.” The truth of his words surprised me as it sounded like a heartbroken confession. Therefore, I couldn’t help asking,
“You are destined for another aren’t you?” His eyes snapped up to mine with his own shock. He looked thoughtful for a moment as though he wanted to explain but then how would he? So in the end he settled for something else and unbeknown to him, it was equally as painful.
“The Gods have their plans for us all,” he told me and I wanted to laugh out loud only it would have been without humour and more out of irony.
“Yes and I often wonder what they will throw my way next,” I told him honestly before turning over and facing the other way, knowing that I couldn’t look at him any longer. I knew I sounded bitter but really, how could it be helped? I wanted to scream out at the same time that I wanted to run away. I think he was also thankful that he no longer had to see the underlying pain in my eyes for he let me turn from him without protest. Instead he put his arm under me, pulled me close and moulded his front to my back, making me feel even smaller than usual.
Thinking about what he’d said and combining this with his actions I knew there was no hope, even lying here in his arms the way I was. He was waiting for his Chosen One and even though he was obviously conflicted with how he felt about me, it made no difference and his statement about the Gods only confirmed this. Because if his reaction after just one kiss was to rip himself away from the moment, then I couldn’t see how we were ever going to take it further?