“Josef is not your father. When I met him, you’d already been born,” she said nonchalantly, without showing even a trace of shame for making me live a lie for years on end, thinking the man in the photo I always kept close to me was my father.
“Why did you lie to me?” I asked, my voice sounding broken. My eyes were moist, but I was determined not to show weakness in front of her.
“Because from a very young age you were too emotional and kind. Sometimes I wondered how such a sensitive kid could’ve come from me.” Having feelings was a weakness in her eyes.
“Why didn’t you tell me the truth if you knew who my father was?”
“Because your real father threatened me that I’d rot away in poverty if I ever revealed his identity. George Peterson was an egomaniacal asshole—”
“George Peterson? The director?”
That couldn’t be true. After all, he’d been one of the greatest American directors of all time, who’d proven himself with world famous films such as A Road to the Future, Meet the Angel and Unclear Feelings. He’d become popular for his ability to capture life’s most precious parts and crucial moments. It was precisely the powerful emotions coursing through his films that grabbed the viewers’ attention and made them sit on the edge of their seats with bated breath. And let’s not forget the comedy, drama, action, love and betrayal. According to the gossip magazines, he’d been one of the richest directors on Earth.
And that man, who unfortunately was no longer among the living, was my father.
“The very same. He died in a car crash. I hope he rots in hell. He left all his money to the children from his marriages. He used to give me a pittance to keep my mouth shut. But listen to me, I want this to stay between us. I don’t want Robert finding out about my past.”
The moment where we could talk like grownups had finally come. The ugly truth was now out in the open.
“Aren’t you afraid that the press might start digging into my past and bring our skeletons out of the closet?”
She showed me the huge diamond on her finger. “I’ll deal with that if and when the time comes. The most important thing is that I’m married to a rich and influential man who loves me. I don’t believe anything could tear Robert and me apart, but I should be cautious nevertheless.”
“Do you know who Fabien’s father is?”
Elise scowled. “Back then, I was dating two producers at the same time.” She said those words as if that was completely normal. “I don’t know for sure which one of the two is his father. But that doesn’t matter because it turned out neither of them had a penny to his name. They both lied they were loaded.”
“May I ask why you wasted your time with a man like Josef? As far as I’m aware, he was neither rich, nor did he have any connections in the movie business.”
Her eyes gleamed at the memory of him. “Josef Wilder was a real alpha male, the most hung man I’ve ever slept with. And having seen photos of his son… He’s even manlier. I have to admit, I’m a little jealous. Still, on the other hand, I’m proud of you for managing to wrap him around your finger.”
Money, money, money… Always money. That was her only priority in life.
I examined the jewelry on her ears, neck and wrist. Her watch, elegant in the way only truly expensive items could be, didn’t escape my attention either. “Have those diamonds made you happy?”
“Of course, Emily. Don’t be ludicrous. Money is very important. When you get married to Ryan Wilder, you’ll know what I mean.”
Our conversation was interrupted by Robert’s return. We had nothing left to say to each other anyway.
“Sorry for the interruption, but we wouldn’t want to miss our flight, honey. We’re on the way back from our honeymoon,” he informed me, his face lit up by a good-natured smile. “Emily, you should drop by when you have the time. I’d love to get to know my wife’s relatives.”
Elise’s face froze in panic.
“Thank you for the invitation,” I said, but I was only being polite. I didn’t want to see my mother anymore. She’d told me what I needed to know. And she clearly wasn’t dying to see me again either. Most likely, if she met my brother on the street, she wouldn’t recognize him.
As if she’d guessed where my thoughts were headed, Elise murmured, “Kiss Fabien from me.”
Yeah right, my brother would be very happy. He never even mentioned her these days.
“Who’s Fabien?” Robert asked curiously.
“Her brother,” Elise replied embarrassedly.
“Bring him along when you decide to visit us. I’ll be glad to meet another member of the family. Our house in Beverly Hills is big, so we can accommodate many guests.” He didn’t have the foggiest how right he’d been when he’d said ‘member of the family’.
“I sure will,” I replied, forcing a smile. But my smile dissipated when Elise hugged me out of the blue. Her scent, which I’d forgotten so many years ago, reached my nose. My knees went weak and treacherous tears threatened to stream from my eyes. I suddenly wanted to remain in her arms forever.
Why, for God’s sake? Why did I continue to love her?
“Forgive me, Emily,” she whispered.
Forgive me… There were so many things I needed to forgive her for. The list seemed never-ending.
A few minutes later, they climbed into a taxi and disappeared into the distance.
I went up to the suite, closed the door and leaned on it.
What a day. Who would’ve thought I’d see my mother again after so many years?
Seeing Ryan’s coat hanging on the backrest of a chair, I picked it up and lay down on the bed. I dug my face into the leather material and started crying. I wept for my brother and for myself, for having our childhood snatched away from us, for the lack of motherly love, for all the suffering Fabien and I had gone through, for the pain I’d caused Ryan. Guilt tore me apart. I’d believed Elise and lived a lie for so many years. Because of my gullibility and credulity, I’d brought so much suffering to the man I loved.
I’d never forgive myself for that. I hoped at least Ryan would have the strength to forgive me.
16
Emily
I woke with a start and realized I’d fallen asleep, exhausted by crying. In my hands, I still held Ryan’s jacket.
As I was getting out of bed, I checked my watch and mumbled, “Goddammit.” There was only an hour and a half left until the concert.
In spite of how hungry I was, I couldn’t spare time for dinner. I had just enough time to take a quick shower and get changed.
Just when I thought my run of bad luck was over, another misfortune befell me. I took a taxi to reach the hall quicker, but it got stuck in a massive traffic jam. If I’d taken the subway, I would’ve got there on time.
I abandoned the taxi and sprinted in the general direction of AccorHotels Arena. By the time I arrived, my heart felt like it’d explode. Luckily, the concert was just about to start. The hall was dark, with spotlights pivoting and firing beams in all directions. The most impatient people in the audience whistled or called out the name of their favorite Blackstone member.
I’d tied my hair in a ponytail, hoping nobody would recognize me. We were in France, so it was less likely, and I hadn’t yet seen my picture in a single gossip magazine. I didn’t want to imagine what would happen if one of Ryan’s groupies recognized me. She’d definitely try to scratch my eyes out in a jealous rage.
Silence suddenly fell and gentle piano sounds filled the hall. The spotlights focused on the pianist. Ryan’s manly handsome face appeared on the huge screens on either side of the stage and the audience lost it. Women started to scream and shout, “Ryan… I love you.” Amid this chaos, my heart started beating hard against my ribcage again, in time with the music. The hysterics mostly died out toward the end of the song, but not for long.
Ryan stood up, showing off his powerful masculinity, and grabbed a guitar. Light flooded the stage in a feast of color, revealing all members of B
lackstone. The fans greeted them with a new wave of cheering.
“Bonsoir, Paris,” Ryan shouted into the mic. Ecstatic, the people screamed back.
I took advantage of the brief brightness in the hall and made my way to my booked seat. I tried to ignore the girls behind me who wouldn’t stop shrieking Ryan’s name. I thought I’d got used to the fact that the man who captured my heart and soul was a big rock star, and that there’d always be women who’d jump at the chance to take him from me. But I was wrong. Slowly but surely, jealousy reared its ugly head. However, I quickly pushed it out of my mind, repeating to myself that Ryan loved me and would never betray or hurt me.
Ryan asked, “Are you ready to hear our new tune?” and the audience deafeningly replied ‘yes’.
He smiled and the girls started screaming again, some of them pulling their hair out. The effect he had on them was mind-boggling. The fans truly adored him. Ryan Wilder was the epitome of manliness, sexiness and sensitivity. An intoxicating and fast-acting cocktail for weak female hearts.
I won’t hide that, just like everybody else, I felt turned on and terribly excited. My heart beat wildly against my ribs, and when Ryan began playing the guitar, goose bumps crawled across my skin.
His voice was incredibly sexy—deep, rich and slightly hoarse.
His fingers slid up and down the strings, making his biceps stand out with every movement. The other Blackstone guys were also giving everyone a run for their money, raging wildly on the stage. Tom was lead guitarist, Benjamin played bass, Jax was on keyboard, and Andrew beat the drums.
There was a raised platform behind the band, where Travis and other half-naked dancers did their thing. The men’s naked torsos were drenched in sweat and the girls swung their hips in time with music, wearing skimpy pieces of fabric. Misty had mentioned that Travis would be at the concert. Seeing him on stage now, wearing a permanent smile on his face, made me very proud of him. He’d managed to make his dreams come true.
So did you, but then gave up very quickly, I reminded myself silently. Yes, I’d been weak and naïve for blindly trusting my mother.
But now it was all over. I’d woken from hibernation. All I had to do was wait to find out if Ryan would forgive me for the pain I’d caused him. Would we get back together?
An amazing pop-rock song emanated from the speakers, and it’d been written especially for me.
You make me so hard, baby, only with a dance
You are so beautiful, I’m in a trance…
When I first met you on the beach… as if that was yesterday
Oh baby, I wanted you to be mine… like I want today
You are my Princess, my Cinderella, my everything
Let me be your husband and give you my ring
Ryan continued singing, every verse tearing my soul apart. The lyrics were full of passion, love and so much sadness. Sadness for the future that had been taken away from us.
But what should I do, God? What should I do?
I want to marry her, but how? Tell me what should I do?
I’m in love with my half-sister
Damn… she’s my half-sister.
As the song ended, Ryan ripped his black stringer tank top off and threw it in the crowd. Women screamed and the girl who caught it started crying from happiness and shock. She pressed the garment to her face, excited that she’d managed to obtain a piece of Ryan Wilder, the rock star who’d won the world over with his sexiness and talent.
Naked from the waist up, his sweaty muscles gleaming in the floodlights, Ryan was now an even sexier sight.
Perfection!
To me, he was sheer perfection.
The performance made the hairs on my body stand up and sent me into the same ecstatic state as everyone else. I hadn’t been to one of his concerts before because money had always been tight. Yet here I was now in the one of the best seats in the arena, watching the show without a need for binoculars.
Playing a relentless sequence of hit after hit, the Blackstone boys were tireless. The entire crowd sang along with the band, trying to make themselves heard over the sound blasting from the speakers. The floor shook as people jumped up and down, hands above their heads. The fire smoldering in my heart started burning at full flame, making me proud of Ryan and his entire band. The tunes he’d written were sexy and romantic and radiated the full range of human emotions at the audience, drowning the people in a sea of love. The fans screamed and clapped in honor and worship of their favorite musicians.
At one point, Ryan climbed down to the barriers and shook the fans’ hands, sparking a wave of euphoria among the crowd. Right then, he turned his head in my direction and spotted me. His eyes told me he wanted to come over, but that seemed impossible. He turned and said something to one of the security guards. Two of them quickly made their way through the throng and led me to Ryan.
“You came,” he whispered, but I managed to hear him despite the noise around us.
He hadn’t truly believed me that I would. He’d lost all trust in me.
As Ryan put his hands on my cheeks, I said, “You’re not my brother.”
“What?”
He leaned toward me and I shouted into his ear, “I spoke to Elise. Josef is not my father.”
Ryan rested his forehead on mine, overcome by emotion.
A tear escaped and rolled down my cheek. “I—”
He interrupted me with a kiss. His lips took control of mine, our tongues danced and suddenly the world around us ceased to exist.
Ryan pulled away from me for an instant and then resumed the kiss, giving me not just his heart, but his soul too.
My brain regained its ability to perceive our surroundings only after we’d stopped kissing. It was only then that I heard the audience’s shouts, wolf whistles and applause.
Ryan smiled, took my hand and led me to the microphone.
“This concert will forever remain in my heart,” he shouted down the mic and the crowd responded with even louder clapping. “Today, my girl…” He glanced at me and smiled again. “Today, she made me the happiest man on this planet. What I’m feeling right now is so powerful, I can’t find the words to describe it. So, all I can do is thank you for this amazing night, which I’ll always remember, and sing one more song. Are you ready to hear ‘The girl with the bright red hair’?”
The audience erupted in wild applause and screams again, with some of the cheekier boys whistling in approval.
The music began, Ryan grabbed the mic and started singing, and the words that came out were meant only for me—the girl with the red hair who’d captured his heart at first sight.
17
Ryan
On our way to the hotel, Emily told me about the chance meeting with her mother and apologized profusely about our breakup. I wished I’d been at that meeting, so I could’ve seen with my own eyes the woman who’d caused Emily so much pain. And who continued to hurt my girl even when she wasn’t around.
What I wouldn’t give to take away her sadness, to erase the bad memories and replace them only with good ones!
In the hotel’s elevator, unable to restrain myself any longer, I put my hands on her delicate face. I kissed her again and again, whispering in her ear how much she meant to me between kisses. Emily Delon was my other half and she’d captured my heart and soul. I belonged to her fully. She belonged only to me. And it would be so until the day we died.
“I’ll never forgive myself for what I did to you. I gave up on our relationship and betrayed you. I ran away—” she said, interrupted by a tear falling from her eye and sliding down her velvet-soft skin.
God, she looked divine even while crying. Her blue eyes seemed to have grown even bigger. Her lips were swollen and soft.
She frowned and continued, “We should’ve had the tests done right away. I was wrong to run away.”
Yes, we could’ve spared ourselves from that grief, but we couldn’t turn back time. Instead of wallowing in the past, we have to move on and look to the futu
re.
I leaned in and bit her lower lip, provoking a soft moan.
“Shush… It’s all over. We’re together now,” I murmured between kisses. I was losing myself in her deep blue eyes.
“I promise, Ryan, I’ll never leave you again. Never!”
I pressed the button and the elevator stared ascending smoothly. I put my hands on her face and stroked her cheekbones with my thumbs. I dried her tears with my lips. Her hands slid under my T-shirt and I growled in pleasure. My mouth covered hers, and my kiss fulfilled every sigh, ache and desire. I wanted her right there and then. To lose myself in her warmth and forget the past.
I slid my hand under her skirt and pulled the thong aside, sinking my middle finger into her. Her pussy muscles contracted instinctively. We both moaned at the same time. My lips couldn’t get enough of her as they slid along the exquisite curve of her neck. Emily was wearing a black tank top that clearly showed her erect nipples. I hungrily started sucking on one of them as she dug her hands into my hair.
“God… Ryan… You’re driving me wild.”
Our burning emotions engulfed us completely.
The elevator bell pinged and we pulled away from each other just as the door opened, finding ourselves face to face with an elderly couple. The woman was gaping in outrage, but her husband was smiling, probably picturing what we’d been doing seconds ago. In a man of seventy, sexual fantasies were still alive even if the package in his pants was more or less dead.
I greeted the couple with a nod, took my girl’s hand and exited the elevator.
I repeatedly reminded myself that I needed to be gentle, but once we were in the suite, I pushed Emily against the corridor wall and threw myself at her like a raging beast. Fortunately, her sighs and moans proved I wasn’t going too far. I hadn’t scared her.
“I want all of you tonight, Emily, and you’ll give yourself to me.” That sounded like an order, rather than a request, but how was I expected to control myself when my body felt like it could explode any second? I needed her to give herself to me fully, without holding back in any way.