The woman pulled a long needle from her case along with a vial of clear liquid. “Are you in pain?” she asked Seth.
The simple, compassionate question nearly made him weep, and he nodded.
“This is going to fight your fever,” she said as she wiped a cotton swab on Seth’s inner elbow. The smell of alcohol stung his nose. “Hold still.” She waited for a pause in Seth’s spasms before she pierced his skin and injected the medicine into his bloodstream. Then she unwrapped his hurt hand and turned it over, keeping her expression neutral and businesslike. Seth thought for a moment that the nurse’s face was glowing with an orange light, but he blinked and she looked normal again. Now the orange light seemed to come from the guard, near his swollen belly. Seth stared at it until it faded away.
“Nan,” came Anne Mather’s voice. She sounded so smooth, so kind, so understanding.
“Yes, Pastor,” Nan said. She spoke the title with deference, as though she’d always dreamed of having a private word with her hero and was finally getting her chance. “I’ve got a young prisoner here who needs emergency medical attention.”
“Who gave you access to him?” the Pastor asked, lilting.
“Jared Carver escorted me here. He’s waiting outside.”
There was a long pause before Mather spoke again. “Nan, that boy is dangerous. We thought it best to keep him in isolation.”
“Pastor, I’m telling you. He’s not dangerous to anyone. He’s at death’s door.”
Another pause.
Nan rushed to speak. “I only say so because I know you wouldn’t want a young man to die, even if he did make mistakes. Everyone deserves a second chance, isn’t that so? Isn’t that what you say in your sermons?” Nan bit her lip, and Seth felt sorry for her. She wanted to believe in Anne Mather. She needed to.
“All right,” the Pastor finally said. “You’re absolutely right, Nan. If you think he’s in danger, we must help him. Mustn’t we?”
“I think so,” Nan said. “Shall I call the infirmary?”
“I will,” Mather said. Her voice was comforting, motherly, and Nan let out a long sigh, as though she’d been afraid that good was bad and up was down. “Sit tight, Nan. Try to make him comfortable.”
Nan took a wad of gauze from her bag and held it under the tap, soaking it with water. When she held it to Seth’s forehead, he started to cry.
“Hush, now,” Nan whispered. She smoothed the hair out of his face and wiped his brow, then pressed the cool cloth to his cheeks and his neck.
Soon two men dressed in white came with a gurney, and Nan helped them lift Seth onto it. As they wheeled him down the corridor, he was struck with a wave of horrible dizziness, and he had to close his eyes or he might fall off.
His next thought was that the brig was too bright. Someone pulled on his wrist while a middle-aged woman shined a penlight into his eyes. Her breath smelled like garlic, and a small speck of tomato sauce clung to the corner of her mouth.
“Can you speak?” she asked Seth. She moved slowly and deliberately, as though she were incapable of panic.
“Yes,” Seth managed to whisper.
“How long ago did you hurt your hand?” the doctor asked him.
He couldn’t form words to answer her.
The doctor nodded. “Doesn’t matter. Looks like broken fingers to me?”
Seth nodded.
“Okay, buddy,” the doctor said, sitting down in a chair right next to Seth’s head. He trusted her absolutely—was it real, or only because he needed to trust her? “Here’s the deal,” she said. “You can have your arm, or you can have your life. You can’t have both.”
Tears squeezed from under Seth’s eyelids, and he bit his lip.
“Are you a brave lad?” She kept her eyes on his. Green eyes, unwavering.
Seth could only look at her.
“Will you let me help you? I have your permission to do what I need to do?”
Seth looked down at his hand. The smell from the brig had followed him here.
Of course, it hadn’t been the brig that stank.
Seth nodded at the doctor, who patted his shoulder.
“Good man. Good decision.” She nodded to someone who stood at Seth’s head, and a mask was fitted over his nose and mouth. “Breathe in deep, okay?” the doctor said.
“Okay,” Seth said into the mask. His own voice sounded as though it were coming from the bottom of a tin can, a nice, comforting, small tin can where he fit perfectly. One day I’ll go back to that tin can, Seth thought. I’ll bring Waverly to show her … if she isn’t with that creep. Her and me in a tin can.
He shook his head to clear it, but the hand with the mask stayed firm on him.
That’s crazy was the last thing he thought.
He woke up to a dark room, immensely relieved to feel his right hand searing with pain. They hadn’t amputated after all! He lifted his hand to look at it, but it was invisible. He could feel it, he ought to be looking right at it, but … He was suddenly attacked by intense vertigo and a horrible pain in his upper arm that nauseated him.
He took deep breaths, holding perfectly still, until the nausea subsided.
Then, with a sinking feeling, he felt with his good hand along the side of his body.
He didn’t have a right hand anymore.
He didn’t have an elbow.
He didn’t have an arm.
He still had a shoulder.
“He’s awake,” he heard a soft female voice say from the shadows. He felt woozy, and he blinked. He was lying in a pool of light surrounded by darkness. The light had a strange hazy quality, as though a thin smoke were lingering in the air, but there was no smell of smoke. It was his vision that was smoky, he guessed. He should tell someone. He opened his mouth to speak but found it difficult to breathe.
“Don’t,” someone said. He got a whiff of some kind of flower, and he turned to see a bouquet of lilacs being set down by his bed on a little table. “Stay still.”
“I can’t—” he gasped.
“You still have a high fever,” said that soft voice from the darkness. Seth blinked as a thin oval face moved into the light next to him. Suddenly everything hurt a little less.
“Waverly,” he whispered. All his jealousy and doubts melted away.
She kissed his cheeks, his forehead, his mouth. She nuzzled her nose against his neck. He tried to put his arms around her and felt almost as though he could. He knew his right arm was gone, but he felt it so clearly.
“Don’t move. You’re weak,” she said. She was crying, and she draped her body over his, holding his good arm down with the weight of her torso. “Just rest.”
“I’m so sorry…”
“Shush.” She placed cool fingers over his lips, then kissed him again, warm, soft. Oh, he loved her. She put her head on his chest and lay there a long time, crying softly. Her tears soaked through his bedclothes and the thin gown he wore. He kissed her hair again and again.
When she’d cried herself out, she lifted her head and smiled at him, but it wasn’t a happy smile. It was a brave smile. She swallowed, preparing to tell him something hard.
“I know my arm…,” he began and lost his breath.
“Okay,” she said and covered his mouth with her fingers. He loved that. He kissed them. “Seth, your infection … it’s bad.”
He nodded. He could feel it, like tiny bugs jiggling all through his body, from his veins to his muscles to his skin.
He couldn’t see her face. She hid it behind her hair, a thick curtain of mahogany waves.
“They said you were missing,” Seth whispered. “Where you been?”
A shadow passed over her face. “Looking for you.”
“How did you find me?”
“I had help,” Waverly said with a glance at the doorway. Seth could see a dark male shape standing just outside the infirmary. “As soon as I was able to, I came to the brig for you. While you were in surgery, I checked on my mom and came right back.”
> “Who is that guy?” Seth asked, his jealously gone. She’s mine, he knew. We belong together.
“I used to think he was my friend but…” She chewed on her lip as she looked at the man. “I saw pictures of me in the corridors. They said truth. Was that you?”
He smiled weakly.
“Thank you.”
He thought over what she’d just told him about his infection and worked up the courage to ask, “Am I dying?”
She looked at him sharply. “Don’t talk like that.”
“Waverly,” he said.
“They’re throwing everything they have at it.”
“Tell me.”
“I can’t,” she shrieked. The room, the darkness outside their pool of light, was jarred by her voice.
Seth heard a chair being pushed across the floor, someone getting up, soft footsteps, and then the nurse who’d saved his life came into the light. She frowned at Waverly. “You need to keep it down. There are other people here.”
“I’m sorry,” Waverly cried, panicked and trembling. “Please don’t send me away.”
Before Seth’s eyes, Waverly fell apart, no more composed than if she were made of loose powder. Her hands caught in her hair, pulling at it in handfuls. Something was wrong with her. Really wrong.
The nurse softened a little, but her words were hard. “Now you know what it’s like to be a hostage.”
“I recognize you,” Waverly said tearfully. “You were on the medical team we took hostage. I know I scared you. I just wanted my mom back.”
“You almost killed Anthony.”
“I never wanted to hurt him.” Waverly pulled on the woman’s shirt like a little girl begging. “Please. Let me stay.”
“I will if you let me give you a mild sedative. You’re hysterical and you’re disturbing the other patients.”
“I know.” Waverly nodded, her eyes dancing over the floor as though she were remembering something, or trying not to.
“Wavey,” Seth whispered. He’d meant to say her full name, had faltered with his tongue. “What did she mean … hostage?”
Instantly she was calm. “How do you know to call me that?”
He crinkled his eyebrows in question as he panted. He was sweaty. His sheets were soaked, and he was overtaken by a sudden falling sensation, as though his bed were being lowered by increments.
“My daddy used to call me that,” Waverly said, smiling through her tears. “I’d forgotten.”
“What happened to you?” he managed to ask just as his bed fell again.
Her face crumpled. “I’ll tell you sometime. But right now, just don’t talk about dying. Okay?”
“Okay,” he whispered. He motioned her over with his right hand, with what should have been his right hand. He felt it moving, beckoning her. The movement made a horrible pain in his shoulder. Oh God, stop moving my hand. Stop moving it, he told himself, but he couldn’t stop. That ghost hand kept beckoning to Waverly, over and over and over.
As though she’d seen the missing gesture, she climbed onto his bed, her body tucked along the length of his. She didn’t move a millimeter when the nurse plunged a needle into her shoulder.
He put his arms around her, the real arm and the missing one, and he held her as long as his strength let him. It wasn’t long, but it was enough for now.
They slept like that a long time.
THE DEVIL
Waverly jerked awake and looked at the clock. She’d slept for hours! She had to go!
Seth was still sleeping, though his body shuddered with every breath and droplets of cold sweat glistened in his hair. She eased off his mattress, tucked the blankets around him, and put a palm to his forehead. He was blistering hot, and he shuddered with every breath. He looked so ill she was afraid to leave him alone, but she’d stayed too long already. Those lunatics had Kieran and she had to do something.
She was about to leave the room when something caught her eye: The glass vial of tranquilizer that the nurse had given her still lay on the counter next to Seth’s bed, nearly full. The nurse had called it mild, but that must have been a lie. It was powerful, and it had acted fast.
Waverly glanced around. The nurse was at her desk at the front of the room looking through a file drawer. Jared was still in the corridor outside the infirmary, dozing on a chair. Careful not to make a sound, Waverly opened the top drawer of the cabinet by Seth’s bed and peeked into it. Nothing. The next drawer down had what she needed. She chose the largest syringe she could find, pierced the skin on the vial of tranquilizer, and drew in as much medication as she could. Then she placed the vial back on the counter, capped the needle, and slipped it into her pocket. With one last look at Seth, she started toward the entrance.
She stopped at the nurse’s desk, waiting for the woman to look at her. “Will you please tell Seth I’ll come back as soon as I can?”
“If you’re so worried,” the nurse said through pursed lips, “why don’t you stay?”
“Someone needs my help,” Waverly answered.
“My, aren’t you important.”
Waverly left without another word, walking right past Jared down the hallway. He jogged to catch up to her.
“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry?” Jared said through the side of his mouth. “It was Kieran’s life or yours.”
“I’ve seen the way you fight.” Waverly made a fist. “You didn’t have to use Kieran. You gave him to those maniacs because the doctor wanted to hurt Mather and save me!”
“Right,” he said with a chuckle.
“What?” Waverly said with a half turn of her head. Jared looked away, embarrassed about something, as though she’d struck close to home without meaning to. “What are you hiding?”
“Nothing.” Jared tried to laugh. “You’ve been through a lot—”
“Don’t.” She held up a hand. She didn’t want any mention of her time with the Pauleys. She studied Jared now, trying to understand why he looked … guilty? No. Embarrassed, as though she’d caught him in a lie. She searched her memory and lighted on something Ginny Pauley had said. “Ginny asked you if the doctor had changed his mind about something. What did she mean?”
“Don’t overthink this.” He lifted up his handheld com unit, and Waverly watched his thumb fly over the small keypad. He typed in a password: mynx101 or mynx1901 … something very close to that. She lifted her eyes to his, hoping he hadn’t noticed her watching. “The cord I used to tie Kieran up?” he said. “It’s got a tracking device in it, no bigger than a pencil eraser.” He rounded on her so that they stood toe to toe, and she could feel his breath caressing her cheek. “I could help you find him, but you’ve never even thanked me for saving you.”
“You’re right,” she said as she took a step back. The easygoing Jared had been replaced by a callous, hard man who matched up a lot better with the violence she’d seen him do. “I’m grateful that you helped me. Really. I … I just need to help Kieran. Okay? Can you help us?”
“It’s just that,” he said, his eyes perfectly still on her, weirdly still, “I love you. But all you care about are these little boys of yours.”
She could only stare at him. “What are you talking about?”
He turned away from her abruptly, walked down the corridor.
“So you’re tracking them?” Waverly asked, trying to make her tone curious and friendly as she jogged to catch up. “You know where Kieran is right now?”
“Yes,” Jared said distractedly. He pushed the button for the elevator, tapping at his leg impatiently. “It doesn’t matter to you that I love you?”
She hesitated. She didn’t know how to have this absurd conversation.
“It doesn’t matter that I saved your life?”
“For that you have my gratitude.” She allowed no trace of emotion into her voice.
Jared looked at her flatly until the elevator doors opened, then he stepped on, his body taut with anger. There were other people already on the elevator, and a man quietly
stepped forward and pushed a button for the next floor. The other people stood in the corners, their eyes fastidiously trained on the floor indicator until the elevator stopped for them, and they stepped off, but as they left a woman looked over her shoulder, first at Jared and then at Waverly. There was an unmistakable fear in her eyes.
The elevator doors closed, and Waverly was once again alone with him. “Why are people afraid of you?”
“People aren’t afraid of me,” Jared said, small voiced.
She said nothing.
“Why do you think they’re afraid?” he asked quietly.
“It’s the way people look at you,” she said. “The women especially.”
“You think you have a reason to mistrust me?” A droplet of spittle flew from between his lips. “I thought we were friends.”
The elevator shook slightly, and Waverly realized she didn’t know where he was taking her.
Jared laughed. “The doctor always warned me about pretty girls,” he said and raised one finger, bending it into the twisted shape of an old man’s talon. “‘If they’re too pretty, they’ll expect you to bend over backward to please them.’”
His impersonation of the doctor was flawless, but this time it was chilling.
“I don’t expect anything from you,” Waverly said quietly. Was he taking her to the habitation levels? She watched the counter above the elevator doors, calculating the levels in her mind. They went past the floor where she lived with her mother, descending deeper into the ship.
“I was once popular with women,” Jared said as they passed the granaries and headed for the forests. “But I sure am striking out with you, huh, Waverly?”
“Maybe you should try someone your own age,” she said.
He punched the elevator wall. “What’s a guy gotta do if saving your life isn’t good enough?”
Waverly wedged her shoulders into the corner. “Why did you help me find Seth?”
He held up the com unit, flicked a button, and Waverly’s voice filled the air. “Seth, your infection … it’s bad…”
“You were recording us?” she asked, stunned.
He grinned. “The doctor likes to know who all the players are.”